请各位好心的版友帮我做下proof-reading吧？

baishi7948

以下文字是用来申请学校的mentor program的information letter。请各位好心的版友帮我做下proof-reading吧。因为我的英文文法不是很好，自己检查也看不出什么。thx!

The chance of taking part in mentor program is an awesome opportunity for me, because I can learn out-of-campus skills from this program, build networks with mature people already in an industry and have a culture experience in a business background.



First of all, a mentor is a one-to-one teacher. With his/her help, I can touch the industry I want to enter in earlier and become more aware of what I really want. After quitting the job of audit assistant, I went back to school to learn more finance stuff, because I want to enter in corporate finance world finally. Now I am learning finance-focused materials that I have never touched before as an accountant student. I am really excited about what I am going through and can’t wait to use what I have learned so far in the real industry if an opportunity is available.



As a business student, I think networking is important; as a foreign student, I think building a relationship with local working people is especially valuable. Mentor program can provide me with this channel of knowing more people in the industry.



Additionally, culture experience is one of my reasons of studying abroad. Actually, I am curious about what the real big differences between people doing business in the east and in the west are. I think mentor program can provide me with an office-working opportunity in which I can taste a different office culture and have challenges in real business world.



In my belief, experiencing more is the origin of self-growth. I think the mentor program is a good event that can open me a door to a wider world where I can have a chance of contacting business people in a different culture, which is important in finance industry, an international industry in my opinion.

baishi7948

拜托拜托，大家至少回句话可以吗？