请美国人做essay修改，adcom会怎么看？

茹公子

请问，让美国人认真给修改一下，或者花钱请essay服务，会不会让商学院怀疑essay的真实性？
因为美国人应该知道中国人真实的英语水平，词不达意，用句古怪在他们看来是理所当然的。经过美国人之手后，essay看起来那么流畅，会不会让他们有其他看法？
请过来人谈谈看法，谢谢！

arthur05

你2个考试作文得分高就问题不大

zhupp

晕死了，lz想太多了，当然是写得越通顺越好！美国人都找editor的。

cannedpineapple

I've never looked for an editor. It is far more important to have clear thought than clear grammar. It is easy for an editor to help you with the latter, but not the former. Unfortunately, it is frequently the former, rather than the latter, that has a bigger impact on an essay's 通顺性.

You are absolutely right- we do not expect the same standard of English composition from applicants in every country.

zhupp

有的时候我们不能保证自己的writing deliver了我们想要表达的意思。jason, 我同意你的观点，不能完全rely on editor。不过我做为foreign speaker的感受是，语言上的局限性还是很大的。有个editor的帮忙，会好很多，不光是grammar拉，还有wording，sentence structure。。一些subtle的difference我们没有办法把握！当然，我们自己要占主导地位，需要多跟editor 交流，告诉他们我们要表达的意思，我觉得这也是个学习的过程。我每次都会让editor track changes，然后仔细读他改动的地方。
我同意jason，adcom会考虑到我们是inernational，会放松些标准，我个人还是prefer能deliver 和 native speaker 一样好的writing。At least，it doesn't hurt！不会有人认为你文章写的太好而怀疑你的故事是不是真的。我想从正常人的逻辑来讲，他们会认为你懂得利用现有的资源把眼前的事情做到最好！
另外我觉得editor就够了，essay服务不一定有必要。因为自己的故事还是要自己来讲！

jenery

没有必要找editor的，能申请MBA的，尤其Top MBA的，本身英文水平就不会很差。认真写就可以了。重要的是思想的表达，遣词造句其实是次要的。想想adcom的人每天要看多少essay，根本不会认真分析你的语法有没有错，结构是不是工整之类，他们在乎的是你的申请动机和leadership potential以及profile是不是他们正在找的。当然，如果你的英语词不达意，那也许真需要editor，不过，同时也需要想想自己是不是真的应该到海外去读MBA。

aspirant2010

我想从正常人的逻辑来讲，他们会认为你懂得利用现有的资源把眼前的事情做到最好！

-- by 会员 zhupp (2009/12/29 5:08:03)

MBA学校未必会同意这个正常人的逻辑。比如Yale:
Because it’s important for your essays to be entirely your own work, we don’t condone using editing services. If you do get advice on your essays from a friend or family member, it’s best to have them review without a pen in hand.


记得见过另一所Top 10的MBA也有同样说明。我相信很多人都会选择editing service，学校也知道这一点。但其实MBA学校并不欣赏，因为这并不是真实的你自己。尤其是如果他们看到过于native的英语，而你的toefl写作并不特别突出，adcom会认为editor替你改动了很多地方甚至重写。所以最好还是稍微隐藏一点。

cannedpineapple

On using essay editing services:

I've talked to the adcom of both Chicago Booth and Wharton, and they say the number 1 problem is that applicants like to use editing services, particularly those from overseas- and they can tell straight away. One issue is, it is often difficult to understand where the lines between 'grammar' and 'structure' and 'story' and 'motivation' are drawn- PARTICULARLY if you are not a native speaker. Using track changes is better, and then making your own decisions on what changes to keep is better- but even then, how will track changes help, if you don't know what changes to keep and what to throw out in the first place (which was why you needed help, no?).

Another variation of using editors is this: I've also seen a lot of people not use 'editors', but instead get alumni to help them edit the essays.. While these are not paid services, you end up with the same problem. Your voice gets lost, and a lot of these applicants end up with very poor results. They think that they've "利用现有的资源把眼前的事情做到最好", and are completely shocked when they don't even get an interview.

When you ask others to tell you about your own voice, it is best to get it from a 'friend or family member', because they know you best. But they too have their own voice, hence Yale asks you to not have them 'edit', but merely 'give advice'. Unfortunately instead of asking people who know them best, most applicants instead ask 'editors' or 'alumni' who don't really know them very well indeed. So if you ask, you should ask for 'advice', not 'editing'; and you should ask people who know you well, rather than worry about whether they know the school well. Most people do the complete opposite, on both counts. They ask for 'editing' rather than 'advice', and they ask it of people who don't know them well at all.

It is ALWAYS true that you should "利用现有的资源把眼前的事情做到最好". The problem is you need to understand what is a 资源, and what will hurt you. Most people don't realise that this is not like applying for a job, where you try and figure out what the company is looking for. In this case, it's the opposite- you need to figure out who you are, and THAT'S what schools are looking for. What is normally a “资源” (asking 'insiders'), has, in a business school application context, quite the opposite effect. By asking someone else, you are in effect saying 'I don't know you at all, and you don't know me, but please tell me what seems to matter most to me."

The result of this process? Not surprisingly, not so good. I've seen this over and over again with many otherwise very qualified applicants.

Just my 2 cents worth.

zhupp

jason, 谢谢你码这么多字！你比我们都看的深，很inspiring的意见！jenery and aspirant2010，我保留我的意见，be yourself 和deliver good essay，这中间的度需要每个人自己去把握。每个人还是需要按照自己的实际情况做出最让自己comfortable的决定。
hehe，希望lz能够figure out 你自己的plan！

aspirant2010

Anyway, 别太明显就好，更别以为学校会欣赏你这样做。尤其是Yale等几所已经明确声明“不能容忍使用editing service”，更是要小心

相信已经足够LZ作出判断