【求助】TWE032 帮朋友改了个作文，实在自己能力有限，请大家帮着看看

greenland127

一个朋友写的文章，想让我帮着改改，因为自己水平有限，怕误导了她，所以还请大家帮着看看，谢谢大家！蓝色是我改过的，估计错误也不少

032 Is it better to enjoy your money when you earn it or is it better to save your money for some time in the future? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion

People live in a materialistic society and the attraction of luxury products is getting more serious in our daily life. Therefore, the issue, whether to enjoy the money when we earn it or to save the money for some time in the future, concerns almost everyone in the modern life. I think both ideas are important for people who work hard and also deserve good lives.

          People live in a materialistic society and face increasing attractions from various luxury products in our daily life. Therefore, the issue, whether to enjoy to money when we earn it or to save the money for some time in the future, concerns almost everyone in the modern life. I think both ideas are equivalently sensible for those hard-working people, who deserve good lives.

       A great amount of people enjoy spending money they earn and living in good life. There is nothing wrong to encourage ourselves by purchasing something as a reward after a period of hard work. This can also be a means to control people's desire; you can only enjoy the fruit after you work hard. These people spend every penny they earn; therefore, they might cherish it and think before they buy.

        A great amount of people enjoy spending money they earn to purchase some expensive merchandise. There is nothing wrong to encourage ourselves by getting a desirable product as a reward after a period of hard work, such as a pair of shoes, a new technology gadget, even a brand new car. Actually, this is a healthy attitude and it helps as a means to control our buying desire-as you can only enjoy the fruit after you make the effort. Moreover, most of people would exert themselves harder motivated by their “wonderful presents”.

        However, enjoying too much is unrealistic because people always need to save for future plans and unexpectedness. Some people have regular saving every month for education, marriage, illness, and some other special occasions. The saving makes people feel secure and it is surely a good preparation for life.
     

      
       However, spending every penny on current enjoyment is not only unrealistic but also unadvisable. It is human nature to desire more. Thus, for most people, they can never balance all the expenditure if they keep spending money on expensive items. Moreover, it is a dangerous to deplete all the money without concerning the unexpectedness. We can never guarantee that there is not emergence happen to us, which almost always requires money. Besides, in my observation it is a wise choice to have regular saving for further education, marriage, illness and some other special occasions.

        For example, I have planned to purchase my PhD study in the US. In order to achieve this goal, I need to save some money for both my tuition and living while I am preparing for the application. Without money, I may not realize my dream even I acquire an admission. Money is not everything, however, without money people can hardly do anything, even survive.

        For example, I have planned to purchase my PhD study in the US. In order to achieve this goal, I need to save some money for both my tuition and living fee while I am preparing for the application. Without money or scholarship, it is still impossible for me to realize my dream even if I can obtain an offer. Money is not everything, however, without money people can hardly do anything, even survive.

     In sum, it is important to enjoy the life by spending money which you earn from hard-working, but it is crucial to save money for the future as well. So, it will be brilliant if we can have a plan of money management which to spend some after the pay day and also save certain percentage for the future. Then, everyone can really enjoy a satisfactory life without financial problems.

     In sum, it is important to enjoy the life by spending money which you earn from hard-working, but it is crucial to save money for the future as well. Therefore, it is advisable to
   plan a management of the income following which we may spend some after the pay day and also save certain percentage for the future-probably a good way for most of us to enjoy a satisfactory life without financial problems.

[此贴子已经被作者于2007-3-1 12:15:16编辑过]