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gyh530

题目How do movies or television influence people’s behavior?

 

文章：

Now people have been walking into the information stage, which has brought many new information exchanging styles into our daily lives, such as movies, televisions and Internet, and these new forms have made their effects on our behaviors unconsciously.

Firstly, unlike traditional information exchanging ways, for example books and magazines, movies and televisions transport information more quickly and visually. In those old days without movies or televisions, it is difficult for one person in the eastern world to know what has happened in the western world, the only way s/he could find was to get a book or a magazine which was published maybe months or years ago, and the information it brought probably was out-dated, but for now, one can get what s/he wants to know through televisions at the same time, especially the sports games s/he loves on live. Furthermore, the traditional ways give us information abstractly, but televisions and movies give them to us vividly, for instance, you can read a travel guide to Beijing in many books, but it must be more attractive to see a travel guide program on television or in a theater.

Secondly, movies and televisions bring us a new way to get education. Before their births, for one who had a full-time work, it was hard to continue his/her studying outside where s/he has worked, movies and televisions provide a new form to continue their studying, through televisions’ educational program, one can stay at home after work in Beijing to learn what s/he wants to learn from a teacher in Shanghai, by which it saves lots of money and efforts for s/he to transport from one place to another place. Moreover, through this way, it also brings us new ways of entertaining, such as learning how to dance tango at home from a dancing program.

Thirdly, movies and televisions accelerate the communication of peoples at different parts of world, which help us to know each other better, concerning eating habits, life styles, and customs, etc.

In conclusion, although they have disadvantages, movies and televisions bring us more convenient, and their invention was the great progress of human beings evolution; their advantages greatly overweight their disadvantages.

 

Joypan

以下是引用gyh530在2006-12-17 20:12:00的发言：

Now people have been walking into the information stage, which has brought many new information exchanging styles into our daily lives, such as movies, televisions and Internet, and these new forms have made their effects on our behaviors unconsciously.

（首先，应该让英文的时态充分发挥作用，既然楼主的第一句话已经表明了时态，用NOW就是多余的了，并且NOW和楼主句子中的时态也不符合。其次，information是不可数名词，应该用much.lives是生命，life才是生活，单词的词性及其意思，楼主需更明确些。最后一个and容易和前面的混淆，但显然前面的是在举例，而后面的则是对句子的衔接，楼主可以换成其他的衔接词，避免重复。）