以下是引用djcong在2006-8-15 15:45:00的发言:也许我理想主义。我总觉得真正好的东西没有那么容易得到。包括感情。所以,年轻的时候不在一个地方也许可以令彼此更珍惜也不一定,如果真心相爱的话。路还长着呢,年纪轻的时候当然要追求自己的梦想。要不然即使你们为彼此放弃了机会,将来感情淡下来一定会把这个提出来,觉得我为你牺牲了如何如何。。。 This is indeed an important issue to consider. No matter how one makes decision, there's chance for regret in the future: giving up opportunity might lead to bitter feelings when affection subsides; on the other hand, if one gives up relationship for career, he/she might very well regret such a decision too. Therefore, if possible, it is better to take some kind of compromise so that the sacrifice is not too dramatic. For example, giving up one's going abroad dream is probably too dramatic and may be invoked as a tool in future quarrels. Similarly, for Chinese students in US, giving up a promising job in China and becoming a F2 housewife/house husband is also one of the most frequently cited reasons for marriage problem. It's best if the one who sacrifices one valuable thing can find a similarly valuable alternative to compensate for the loss. For example, if one's graduate study in US leads him to even greater career advancement in the future, then such sacrifice is not quite a sacrifice any more. Of course, such ideal scenario is not always possible. It's after all a tough decision to make, and it may very well be the case that I am being too idealistic here.
[此贴子已经被作者于2006-8-15 16:23:23编辑过] |