请大家帮我改改这篇吧!! 谢谢了!

ISAIH

A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do you think this person would like and dislike about living in your town or city? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay.
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I was born in a small city named Leshan. I have lived in this city for more than ten years, and I have traveled to the other places of China with my parents for about seven years. Compare with these cities, I think Leshan is a good place to live. Although it is not developed as Beijing or Shanghai, I believe many people will live comfortable in Leshan.

One of my friends is planning to move to Leshan, I have told her many advantages of living in this city, but there is some minor disadvantages of settling in there. First at all, this city is too small. There is no McDonald’s, KFC, or Puzzle Hut at all. I know many young people favor these. Second, although the people who live in the city can get new information from the Internet, it is not convenient as living in big city. For instance, if a new computer game had began to sell in June in Beijing, then one month later we could buy the game in Leshan, even may be two months later.

I can’t deny there are some disadvantages of living in Leshan, but this city is really suitable for people to stay. One of the most important points is there is no pollute at all! Because this city is not modernized as the other big cities, there is not many cars. People are accustomed to take buses, so the traffic is not as terrible as the Beijing’s. I know my friend hates traffic jam, may be she will prefer the traffic situation in this city. In addition, there is no factory located in Leshan or the areas around this city, so the air is very clean.

My friend prefers to live in a city that is different form the other places, and then Leshan is a good city for her to stay. The Great Buddha, which is very famous in the world, is located in this city! The Great Buddha is one of the Seven Wonders of the World. Millions of people travel to visit it every year. If my friend settled in Leshan, she could watch this great structure every weekend.

I prefer to live in this wonderful city, although it is not modern. I believe my friend would like it too. Some disadvantages wouldn’t affect her opinion, and the fact that she has that tiny bit of inconvenient is definitely part of its appeal. Some people say Leshan is just like the never land, the person who is careerism can’t live in there forever.
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The Great Buddha is one of the Seven Wonders of the World.

这句俺想说的是: 乐山大佛是世界七大奇迹之一.
但是没学过这种表达法, 不知写的对否? 还望高人指点一二. m_ _ m