搜索
查看: 3330|回复: 93

[备考心经] 8.25二战110(28+28+24+30)10天作文23-30不是梦!

  [复制链接]
发表于 2018-9-5 10:46:06 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
7.14一战成绩:104(28 29 23 24)
8.25二战成绩:110(28+28+24+30)
先说题外话,我准备二战之前时间比较紧张,只剩不到10天左右了,当时我决定口语先放一放,维持原有水平就可以了,阅读和听力也保持现状就行,专攻写作。结合个人情况来看,我的口语想要短时间内提升是最困难的(毕竟是个口语渣渣),所以我10天基本上都花在了写作上。和我有一样情况的托友们,也可以有针对性的专攻一项。

一、综合写作的重要性
准备过程中我最大的经验教训就是:不要轻视综合写作!考试之前有问周围的同学朋友,大家的反应普遍都是:啊我综合写作就考前随便练了两遍,套套模版就可以了啊,最后是good。所以我一直错误的认为综合写作就很轻松的可以搞定,第一次考试把90%的精力都放到了独立写作上面去,最后出来的结果是综合Fair独立good24分。

关于综合写作的重要性,我觉得这篇文章讲得很到位:

http://bj.xdf.cn/vip/zd/48465.html
以下是文章中的原话:
“同样是28分,很明显综合5独立4的28分的难度远远低于综合4独立5。究其原因,仍然是在于综合写作不需要我们表达任何自己的观点,只需要忠实重现听力与阅读的反驳关系就可以了。
而独立想要拿到5分,不仅举例要详实,更要论证全面,语言表达还要地道(尤其是使用地道的小词)。逻辑和语言上的要求,加上托福独立写作话题的广泛性,平时基于大量阅读的长期的语言积累和对一些普遍社会争议性话题的必要的有一定深刻程度的思考就成为阻碍我们托福独立写作拿到满分的最大障碍。很明显,这不是短期突击能够达到的。
但阻止托福独立写作拿到满分5分的障碍并不是阻碍独立拿到Good的障碍,独立的4分对于任何能够正常在高中英语课没有一觉睡到下课的中国学生都不是问题。
独立想要拿到4分的Good,我们只需要保证自己没有明显的语法错误,不用偏难怪词秀自己的单词量,不写从句套从句的“长难句”,不写“通篇只有主谓宾”的流水账;能做到长短句结合,逻辑拆分简单合理,举例论证逻辑连贯,故事讲述用词生动,语言风格娓娓道来,独立就能拿到Good。”

二、托福综合写作如何提高
http://bj.xdf.cn/vip/zd/48465.html
还是这篇文章,下面有举例两个TPO的写作示例,我觉得受益匪浅。

例2:TPO30最后一段论证
TPO30的最后一段是这样说的:
阅读认为,burning mirror相对于flaming arrow并不是一个更好的武器。既然他们俩都能点着罗马战船,在flaming arrow已经是一个成熟武器的情况下,古希腊人没有必要额外费力去制造和使用burning mirror。但听力认为,burning mirror确实是相对于flaming arrow更有效的武器。
首先flaming arrow是一个成熟的武器,这意味着罗马人也对这个武器十分熟悉。他们会时刻瞭望提防flaming arrow,一旦射到船上起火,罗马战士可以随时扑灭。但是burning mirror发出的burning rays罗马士兵是看不到的,他们只能看到burning mirror。
因此,burning mirror可以魔法般地在一个罗马人没有注意到的船上的地方点起火。burning mirror确实是一种更有效的武器。
这一段英汉混合段落有235字。不总结,即使细节都能在听力中记录下来,咱们也不可能有时间把字打完。
下面直接给大家看总结和反驳关系都写作到位的例子:
“Third, the lecturer argues that the passage ignores one important advantage of the burning mirror--the burning rays are invisible. In fact, Roman soldiers were constantly watching for flaming arrows and were ready to put out any fire they might start. The unpredictable fire surprisingly and magically started by the invisible burning rays would make the burning mirror a more effective weapon than a flaming arrow.” (66 words).
各位同学可以挑战一下在同样的信息量下能否比这段写的短。通常情况是,要么字数达到90以上,要么减少信息量维持在60多字,要么自断双臂缺少重要信息量才能低于这个字数。注意这里听力展开的细节。
听力的主论证是“因为罗马士兵不能很快扑灭burning mirror的火(原因),所以burning mirror是比flaming arrow更有效的武器(结论)” 。这时我们要添加“原因的原因” 才能让我们的原因成立,论证才能有说服力。这里我们添加的细节是“ 因为罗马士兵看不到burning mirror的“燃烧光线(burningrays)”。
听力的细节部分,要展开完整逻辑,即展开至“原因的原因”。理由很简单,听力的论证是“理由-结论”这种格式。而反驳冲突点,一定会出现在听力的理由和阅读的某个理由之间,这时如果只说“因为听力的A理由正确所以阅读的Z理由错误”,这样的论证强度不足。因为这样写,听力只是宣称(assert)A理由正确,而没有提出足够的支持去论证(argue)A理由正确。只宣称不论证仅仅是一个嘴炮。我们必须要让听力的理由也成立才能使反驳足够有效。
这时我们就要再展开一层论证,去添加A理由成立的理由。换言之,增加的多一层论证能使一个valid argument(逻辑上成立的论证)变成一个sound argument(事实上成立的论证)。


综上,我觉得托福写作其实不难,重点在于你要把听力的细节全都概括好,重在考查你行文的逻辑。就好像如果你实际去国外上课,先阅读相关文献再听教授lecture,然后要写一篇概括的话,那么你的文章一定是要把道理和逻辑能自圆其说了,别人才能看懂,对吧?
比如上文提到的要把“理由的理由”说明白,直到你觉得这事儿说清楚了,你给一个没上过课的人看人家也能看懂你在说什么,那么你的文章肯定是good呀!

三、独立写作
我个人来说,自己的最大的毛病是老是写着写着思维像一匹脱缰的野马跑走了,最后文章不能很好的切题。至于词汇积累、语法、行文什么的我基础还说得过去,所以主要是后期在切题和文章逻辑上面下了很大的功夫。
在我的理解中,如果词汇丰富、单词拼写错误少,语法错误少,句式丰富分情况下,想要拿到高分就要特别注重:1、切题 2、论证的逻辑
在附件中我贴出来了我23分时候写的作文练习和考前两天写的作文练习,里面也有老师给出的评价和批改,大家可以看一下区别在哪里。


考前2天的作文练习也贴出来了:
Do you agree or disagree with the statement: Many people think that athletes or celebrities that are from the entertainment business can change their careers to be politicians. Do you agree or disagree with this idea of profession change?

Actor Schwarzenegger is famous worldwide not only for his muscular figure but also for his success in the election of the governor of California. It is not rare for many athletes or celebrities to change their career and run for a position in the government. However,  I am not in favor of such profession change for several reasons.

Being in the entertainment industry for so long, celebrities often lack the essential knowledge to do the political work. In other words, they are far from being qualified. Many celebrities choose to seek a high position in the government, with no idea of how complex the system is. To deal with it, professional knowledge in related fields is a must. For instance, when the horrible global financial crisis hit Chinese market in 2008, profound knowledge in economy and deep insight of the financial system are needed to turn the tide. What can an actor do when faced with the same situation? Maybe the only "contribution" he can make is delivering an inspiring speech to the public. If a politician is not even able to explain the term "credit crunch", how could he earn the trust of the masses and do his job? The same goes for the athletes. Many brilliant athletes start training at a very young age. To acquire a medal in the international games, they have to undergo extremely intense training from day to night. Consequently, a good command of knowledge of other aspects is impossible for them. The number of gold medals he earns in the Olympics does not represent extraordinary statesmanship. After all, we are not talking about electing a coach for the national team.

Unlike shooting a film, in which an actor can redo the scene freely if he forgets his line, being a politician means that there is no second chance. The reason is quite simple: every decision the politician makes concerns the well-being of thousands of citizens. Under the command of a politician, a bridge might be built; a community can be established; a financial policy might be implemented. Thus, politics is of no doubt a complicated process which involves an overall and careful evaluation of the interests of all parts. Absence of critical knowledge may lead to catastrophes in decision-making and there is no turning back. Therefore, candidates who are truly experienced in politics deserve our vote the most.

Candidates in the limelight draw more attention from the fans and public, which is definitely unfair to other candidates running for the same job. Too much fame may mask one's inability to govern. The public tend to focus solely on the perfect images that celebrities built or the past success of the athletes, ignoring other candidates' real capacity.

To sum up, politician is a hard job that is not suitable for everybody, especially celebrities and athletes.








本帖子中包含更多资源

您需要 登录 才可以下载或查看,没有帐号?立即注册

x
 楼主| 发表于 2018-9-5 11:02:05 | 显示全部楼层
还在码字中!稍等大家!
 楼主| 发表于 2018-9-5 11:36:09 | 显示全部楼层
顶顶顶
 楼主| 发表于 2018-9-5 12:19:08 | 显示全部楼层
顶顶顶
发表于 2018-9-5 12:47:47 | 显示全部楼层
发表于 2018-9-5 13:48:53 | 显示全部楼层
Mark一下!               
发表于 2018-9-5 13:49:42 | 显示全部楼层
想问一下楼主口语是怎么练的
发表于 2018-9-5 14:03:28 | 显示全部楼层
Mark一下!               
发表于 2018-9-5 14:34:22 | 显示全部楼层
看一下!               
 楼主| 发表于 2018-9-5 15:28:23 | 显示全部楼层
zsq947 发表于 2018-9-5 13:49
想问一下楼主口语是怎么练的

口语的话推荐一个喜马拉雅栏目《坤哥托福口语高分示范》,准备时间比较紧张的话可以听音频,见缝插针地练习~
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 立即注册

Mark一下! 看一下! 顶楼主! 感谢分享! 快速回复:

近期活动

正在浏览此版块的会员 ()

手机版|Archiver|ChaseDream ( 京ICP证101109号 )

GMT+8, 2018-12-10 14:36 , Processed in 0.214912 second(s), 6 queries , Memcache On.

ChaseDream 论坛

© 2003-2018 ChaseDream.com. All Rights Reserved.

返回顶部