劳烦修改。

qinxing

In some countries, teenagers have jobs while they are still students. Do you think this is a good idea? Support your opinion by using specific reasons and details.

Although a lot of people think that teenagers are not good for having job when they are still studying, different people would have different opinions. As far as I am concerned, I strongly believe that teenagers are very good for having job. I will illustrate my views by following discussion.

First of all, teenagers can learn a lot of practical experiences which they can not learn from books. Moreover, they can use their knowledge which learned from books to us in the work. As a result, they get a lot of experiences before they graduated from university. They can take a lot of advantages to find job in the future when they graduated.

Secondly, teenagers working can reduce their family financial problems. Furthermore, these working experiences enable the students to know how hard to earn money and understand the value of money and that “Money does not grow on trees.” After the students see how hard they has to work to earn money, they will be more reasonable while spending it, thus their purchasing behavior will be enhanced.

The last but not least, they would know how to reasonable management their time. They should earn money and learn knowledge at the same time, and also they should do some exercises to build their body.

In conclusion, based on the reasons that I presented, I strongly believe that teenagers can have a job. They will benefit significantly from the working experiences. In this way, teenagers will be more precious their time and they will know better how to spend money.

pengstone

以下是引用qinxing在2005-4-21 13:27:00的发言：

In some countries, teenagers have jobs while they are still students. Do you think this is a good idea? Support your opinion by using specific reasons and details.

Although a lot of people think that teenagers are not good for having job （正确的表达应该是 it is good for teenager to have jobs）when they are still studying, different people would have different opinions. As far as I am concerned, I strongly believe that teenagers are very good for having job. I will illustrate my views by following discussion.

First of all, teenagers can learn a lot of practical experiences which they can not learn from books. Moreover, they can use their knowledge which learned from books to us in the work. As a result, they get a lot of experiences before they graduated from university. They can take a lot of advantages to find job in the future when they graduated. 划线部分的时态有问题

Secondly, teenagers working 怪怪的 （teenagers can reduce their family's financial burden by earning their own money）can reduce their family financial problems. Furthermore, these working experiences enable the students to know how hard to earn money and understand the value of money and that “Money does not grow on trees.” After the students (they, 注意代词的使用)see how hard they has to work to earn money, they will be more reasonable while spending it, thus their purchasing behavior will be enhanced.（learn how to use money more wisely and how to improve their purchasing behavior）

The last but not least, they would know how to reasonable management (语法错误)their time. They should earn money and learn knowledge at the same time, and also they should do some exercises to build their body.

In conclusion, based on the reasons that I presented, I strongly believe that teenagers can have a job. They will benefit significantly from the working experiences. In this way, teenagers will be more precious their time and they will know better how to spend money.

qinxing

thanks for the modification

qinxing

In some countries, teenagers have jobs while they are still students. Do you think this is a good idea? Support your opinion by using specific reasons and details.

Although a lot of people think that teenagers are not good for having job (it is not good for teenager to have jobs) when they are still studying, different people would have different opinions. As far as I am concerned, I strongly believe that teenagers are very good for having job. I will illustrate my views by following discussion.

First of all, teenagers can learn a lot of practical experiences which they can not learn from books. Moreover, they can use their knowledge which(which they/划掉which) learned from books to us in the work. As a result, they get a lot of experiences before they graduated (have been graduated) from university. They can take a lot of advantages to find job in the future when they graduated (have been graduated).

Secondly, teenagers working (teenagers) can reduce their family (family’s) financial problems (burden by earning their own money). Furthermore, these working experiences enable the (划掉) students to know how hard to earn money and understand the value of money and that “Money does not grow on trees.” After the students (they) see how hard they has to work to earn money, they will be more reasonable while spending it, thus their purchasing behavior will be enhanced (learn how to use money more wisely and how to improve their purchasing behavior).

The last but not least, they would know how to reasonable management (reasonably manage) their time. They should earn money and learn knowledge at the same time, and also they should do some exercises to build their body.

In conclusion, based on the reasons that I presented, I strongly believe that teenagers can have a job. They will benefit significantly from the working experiences. In this way, teenagers will be more precious their time and they will know better how to spend money.

brace

请把标题改一下吧。 谢谢