mint的写作贴~~大家来猛拍吧~~感激ing

remint

7月6日独立On a Sunday afternoon,I tried to clear upthe old stuffs of the house which mainly came from my grandfather’s.Besidesboxes of books and letters,what I found were boxes of tapes which arouse mycuriosity.After asking my grandfather,I learnt that the tapes were for Englishstudy and were very precious material at that moment.
If you have never had such experience as mygrandfather’s,you would never know how easily to become educated nowadays.

Undeniable, technology exert significantimpact on our daily life by changing a lot of living ways,specifically,thestudy ways. On no account can we ignore the convenience and efficiency broughtby the advancing techonologies.When we need the information for researches orpaperes, instead of searching piles of books in the library in order to findout the useful ones, we just need to click the mouse,type several keys words into the computer and wait the proper information shown on the screen. In thisway, we saved our time which can be used to further learning or can be spent onmore fields which we are interested in. With the help of rapidly growingtechnology, people begin to change their learning method into a easier wayconveniently and efficiently.

What’s more, the fierce competition amongpeople get them into the habit of learning. It is widely acknowledged thatpeople are easily influenced by the environment they involve in. Just imaginewhat it would be like if your friends and family members never read books orstudy in high motivation, you will certainly get the implications that to beeducated is unnecessary at all. However, most positions in the job markets needthe employee either has high education or expert in certain technical skill.That is the reason why everybody keeps studying after graduation and even makeit a life-long process. The pressure from the surroundings acts as the motionto push us to chase further on the way to the palace of knowledge.

Last, we cannot emphasize the importantrole played by the government too much. In the past, the government used toinvest mainly on the public infrastructures to help economic growth. Overrecent years ,since the government realized that education is an essential wayto improve the international reputation , investments spent on education ,suchas the compulsory one for the children from 6 to 15 years old, has risesignificantly. In this way, the basic education covers so wildly over thecountry that the government report has shown continuous drop of the illiteraterate. What a golden age we live in !

From what discussed above, we can draw theconclusion safely that many factors lead us easier to be educated. So many goodopportunities are welcomed us that we can’t waste the time any more. Takingactions right now, pick up a book from your bookshelf and learn something!

DanielleZ

7.10 这篇mint是限时写的么？感觉单词拼写的错有有点多啊。需要注意哦论证的挺好的，还有些建议，我已经用蓝色字体标明了。加油哦~
Working andliving in the city with rapid growth seems make people adapt to the fast-pacinglifestyle. It seems that patience is gradually replaced by ambition, that is,people are less like to wait before taking action. In a result, a firecely debate over patience is discussed widly bythe public. Some hold the point that action equals to efficiency and cannot be emphasized too much underthe current condition. Others who stand on the opposite side claim thatpatience is the most important element for success. In my opinion, it is tooearly to make a conclusion.

Initially, the neccesity of patience cannot be ignored, forpatience is always accompanied with more consideration and better preperation. ‘Inner Peace is the key characterastic to help you defeat your enemies!’ The line, which is from Kongfu Panda, one of my favorite cartoons,indicates the truth of patience. Armies can never win during wars if they arewithout well-planned tactics on which leaders would have spent months pondering; badhabbtis onlycan be eliminated by preverence and strong wil instead of permenat actions; closely relationship between couples depends onunderstanding and tolerance rather than the first-sight crush. All of the characterasitic aboveoriginate from patience and it really exerts geartinfulence on a person’s whole lifetime.

On the other hand, taking action never weightslighter than having patience. I still remembered the situation in 2008,when(建议把situation后面用从句引出earthquake) the ever-biggest earthquake happened in China:thousands of people were buried by collapsed builings ,(建议用.) fortuanately, as local government and other districtsdispatches the searching team immeadiately to help find the hurt people(建议不要啦), some(建议改成many) people survied from the catastrophy. No one could imagine(我觉得可以再加一句how many people would die from that catastrophe，因为imagine后面没有宾语), if the descion made with a littler delay. And the exmples in other areas are not rare: in the stocking market, fast and accurate decisions must betaken by the investors, while long time hesitation in seekingfor the best opportuniy probably results for(in) missing the right time to bid. It always paysto take action properly.

As far as I am considered, action and patience isto suceess what paint and water is to abeautiful painting(怎么理解啊？).It is indispensable to combine them together as to reach the goal. During aidactivity, the team members need to search patiently for days, saving as mostpeople as they could; after spending years together with the one you love,furthering the step to marrigage needs the determination to take action(我觉得可以只说抢险一个例子，正面说要快，反面说同样需要耐心。感觉会更有说服力一些). Inthis way, the two parts is not conflict each other but rather compatible.

From what has been discussed above, I could safelydraw the conlusion that action is not less important thanpatience and vice versa. I prefer their combiniation to an absolute ‘one or the other’ answer.

DanielleZ

hello, 7.10的独立我写完啦~麻烦帮忙修改一下吧~http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-727156-8-1.html

remint

7.10
Working and living in the city with rapid growth seems make people adapt to the fast-pacing lifestyle.It seems that patience is gradually replaced by ambition, that is, people are less like to wait before taking action.In a result , a firecely debate over patience is discussed widly by the public.Some hold the point that action equals to efficiency and cannot be emphazied too much under the current condition.Others who stand on the opposite side claim that patience is the most important element for success.In my opinion, it is too early to make a conclusion.

Initially, the neccesity of patience cannot be ignored for patience is always accompanied with more consideration and better preperation.‘Inner Peace is the key characterastic to help you defeat your enemies!’The line from Kongfu Panda ,one of my favorite cartoon,indicates the truth of patience.Armies can never win during wars if they are without well-planned tactics on which leaders would have spent months pondering; bad habbtis only can be eliminated by preverence and strong will instead of permenat actions; closely relationship between couples depends on understanding and tolerance rather than the first-sight crush. All of the characterasitic above originate from patience and it really exerts geart infulence on a person’s whole lifetime.

On the other hand, taking action never weights lighter than having patience. I still remembered the situation in 2008,when the ever-biggest earthquake happened in China: thousands of people were buried by collapsed builings , fortuanately, as local government and other districts dispatches the searching team immeadiately to help find the hurt people, some people survied from the catastrophy.No one could imagine if the descion made with a littler delay.And the exmples in other areas are not rare: in the stocking market, fast and accurate decisions must be taken by the investors,while long time hesitation in seek for the best opportuniy probably result for missing the right time to bid.It always pays to take action properly.

As far as I am considered, action and patience is to suceess what paint and water is to a beautiful painting. It is indispensable to combine them together as to reach the goal.During aid activity, the teammembers need to search patiently for days, saving as most people as they could; after spending years together with the one you love, furthering the step to marrigage needs the determination to take action.In this way, the two parts is not conflict each other but rather compatible.

From what has been discussed above, I could safely draw the conlusion that action is not less important than patience and vice versa. I prefer their combiniation to an absolute ‘one or the other’answer.

DanielleZ

Hello mint, 不好意思啊，我的作文来晚啦~下面是我7月9号的独立作文连接，麻烦帮我修改一下哦~谢谢啦~
http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-727156-7-1.html

remint

谢谢~~我去拜读一下

jasonliu119

It is not an uncommon situation （个人对这个曲折的表达很反感，呵呵，不知道ETS怎么看）that your friend comes up with the problems while deal （dealing）with his school tasks. In that case, those who prefer to give their friends a hand believe that to be a friend in need is undoubtedly（什么意思？用形容词吧？） .But whether the help is effective, I think is （两个动词了。it is吧？）still open to discuss. Actually, after considering every aspect, I would rather suggest my friend to ask professional tutor for help. To fully understand my view, it’s necessary to see the following reasons.



Common though the way to help a friend with the schoolwork ourselves, it is no more convenient than to ask for the tutor directly. My own story can provide a good proof to this point. Last term before the final exam, my best friend phoned me for a difficult math question. I promised to figure it out without hesitation, but after racking my brain for the whole night, I failed to solve the problem. What made it funny was that our tutor told us this problem was out of the course content in class, which meant the exam would not involve any related knowledge of it. How frustrated I was at that time, as the whole night wasted could have （此处应该用被动，been） spent on other important subjects. The story is not rare in daily life. If only we had asked the professional tutor directly, we could have solved the problem more efficiently and more conveniently.（好句）



Another key point is that discussing the schoolwork with the tutor is definitely a good way to improve personal communication skills. Nobody is more familiar and specialized to the course than the tutor of a certain subject; what’s more, they have better understandings of what the professor teaching the class focuses on. Discussing with the tutor, not only can we learn a lot from solving problems（此处改用the solutions to to the problems 更好吧？）, we can also deepen the perception of the whole filed in an academic way. Some extra benefits, such as more information about the exam range, will be given to you if you are lucky enough.（这点我怕老外不太理解，呵呵） As a result, the more questions you discuss with your tutor, the more improvement you will get. （好句）After a term, you will find how largely it helps you with the communication skills, especially in academic part.（这段中心是说问问题时提高自身的交流能力，但是觉得你的论证不够贴切哦。我会这样说：当问一个问题时，学生会尽力阐明这个问题和自己的看法，这样就可以提高表达、交流能力了。）



Certainly, solving the problem with my friend has its own advantages. Our friendship will be enhanced by sharing time together, our study passion will be aroused through fiercely debating and our impression on the problem will be very clear. But all of those can be got by other methods discussing the problem together after going for the tutor.（这句话我看不懂，got改为received吧，然后那个by other methods discussing the problem together after going for the tutor什么意思啊？methods指什么方法？然后discussing这个主动结构是修饰methods的？给我的感觉是methods拟人化了、、、、）



From what has been discussed above, we can safely draw the conclusion from the merits of the help from tutor. Next, when the phone of asking aids from you, you should not easily lend a hand as a so-called true friend.

总的来说不错的啊！
最大的特点就是句式丰富，论证得很丰满。就是个别地方我觉得是弄巧反拙了，可以表达更加直接、简洁和有效吧~
http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-712479-1-1.html 这是我对写作的一些看法~

remint

With the rapid growth of the economic, oncompanies does not want to take usage of the trend to make more profits. The decisionsfor the investment always need to be cautious for hundreds of companies become bankruptdue to the incorrect decisions. That’s the reason why no matter the shareholdersor the executive boards often have controversial ideas about the investmentissues. Some of them hold the idea that money should be invested into thetraining programs for workers to improve their skills, which make their workingmore efficient and proficient; while others express other views. In my opinion,it’s too early to make a hasty conclusion for investment is a complex processdepending on different types of companies and different conditions.

Admittedly, workers’ skills are veryessential to the development of companies.’ In the 21 century, human resourcesare the core competitive capacities for companies.’ Just imagine what it wouldbe like if a company runs with all the employees who are lack the professional knowledgeand not familiar with the advancing industrial progress. Definitely, it willpose a great threaten to the daily operation of the company, let alone thefuture development. If human resources are as blood of the company, the updated training for them acts as the fresh air providing the fresh oxygen tokeep it run healthily.  However, otheraspects are also indispensable in order to help the company win the success.

On no account can we less the importance ofhigh-tech equipments in manufacture industry. The companies in this field havethe following characteristics: their massive products are made from thestreamline and the profits rely largely on the equipment efficiency. A reputablecompany called Bao Gang in China
is famous for its high –tech equipment for management and steel production. Theadvancing technique makes great contribution to the in-time demand worldwideand emphasizes much more on environmental protection by reusing heat from the exhaustionand recycling the waste water. By investing majority funds on this part, BaoGang is well known for decades and continuously devotes to GDP growth of China. Thus, itis not hard to tell the importance of the high-tech equipment investment.
Brand marketing and sales promotion arealso need to be focused when making investment decisions. P&G spends lotsof investment on building up  its goldenbrand, specifying its products from other companies like Luxury, and promotingnew products by attractive various advertisements. No denying the success ofP&G is due to its brilliant investment on this special perspective.

So as discussed above, there is no absolutestandard for a big company’s investment decision.

包子不包子

7.8综合

The reading passage raises the issues that the yellow cedar is decreasing since about 1880 for three main reasons.The professor refutes that the claims are not adequate by providing further different evidence.

The speaker mentions that the healty cedars are more resistant to the insect infestation than other species,because their leaves and tree barks are saturated with poisonous chemicals.The reason why the record in the reading for beetles attack is that the beetles attacks the trees which are already damaged and sick,which are likely to be dead.According to his statement,the beetles are not the fundamental factor for the decrease of the trees.

The next view made by the professor is that the dropping exists all over the northwestern coastline of the United States,including both the mainland and the island.What needs to be pointed is that on the island,the Cedar's population still decreased withou bear living.The above evidence shows that the bear is also not the key factor.

The speaker also demurs the third hypothesis by declaring that an important fact is missing in the reading.The decreas is more seriously in the low elevation areas than the high elevation ones .What's more ,the temperature in the low elevation is warm,while in high elevation is cold.This indicates that the root systems are not sensitive in cold weather.If not,the trees would die more in the high elevation places.

可以适当提携阅读中的观点 对照比较起来逻辑更清楚
蛮好的了 小问题 标点后要加空格哈

remint

7.8综合

The reading passage raises the issues that the yellow cedar is decreasing since about 1880 for three main reasons.The professor refutes that the claims are not adequate by providing further different evidence.

The speaker mentions that the healty cedars are more resistant to the insect infestation than other species,because their leaves and tree barks are saturated with poisonous chemicals.The reason why the record in the reading for beetles attack is that the beetles attacks the trees which are already damaged and sick,which are likely to be dead.According his statement,the beetles are not the fundamental factor for the decrease of the trees.

The next view made by the professor is that the dropping exists all over the north coastline of the United States,including both the mainland and the island.What needs to be pointed is that on the island,the Cedar's population still decreased withou bear living.The above evidence shows that the bear is also not the key factor.

The speaker also demurs the third hypothesis by declaring that an important fact is missing in the reading.The decreas is more seriously in the low elevation areas than the high elevation ones .What's more ,the temperature in the low elevation is warm,while in high elevation is cold.This indicates that the root systems are not sensitive in cold weather.If not,the trees would die more in the high elevation places.