写作小分队 开作文贴 (⊙o⊙)

jacki1

考试临近了， Keep practicing!

jacki1

8.5 Tpoic: To increase economic growth, governments can neglect environment concerns.

The world today faces two main problems: the economy and the environment. In some countries, economic development is the hub of all national affairs because only by doing this can these undeveloped countries feed poor people and push the nation to a more industrialized level. On the other hand, for rich countries and areas such as US and UK, there is no need for fast speed growth and fast speed resources consumption. In my opinion, whatever the country is poor or not, there is no excuse for neglecting environment concerns.

First of all, I do agree that economic development is a vital part of the construction of a country or area. Effective government policies and healthy plans would bring the country with prosperity and success. And of course many social problems will be solved such as poverty and unemployment. So undeveloped and developing countries need financial and technical assistance from richer ones if we want to balance the world's wealth and create a harmonious global village. So, since so many people are living in poverty and difficulty, generating economic growth has its necessity and possibility.

However, we must point out that some developing countries shelve the environment concerns, focusing on development only. That is a detrimental thing because the fast economic development and high GDP growth is dangerously based on overuse of natural resources, destruction of ecosystem, huge emission of pollutants. China, I have to say, now is facing this kind of dilemma. So as you can see the evidence by such example that ignoring the environment would make those irrational governments flourished and succeeded in the short run, but they all will end up with both economic failure and environment destruction. So it is apparent that government must take into account the concerns of energy use, resource efficiency and environment protection.

What should we do if we want a more balanced and sustainable growth? Well, in my viewpoint, advanced technologies should be taken in the field of extraction industry and chemical and electronics industry. To run the economy stably and properly, governments also have to erect regulations and policies on relative fields. As citizens, we should turn our lifestyle into a greener one intentionally.

As we have discussed from above, governments should and must concern environment issue seriously in order to lead a increased economic growth.

jacki1

0806的三选一题目好难写啊 写了一个小时。。。
求指点 这种范围很小的题目怎么写 交友 之类的

We begin to build our social ties since we enter the primary school. As we become older, the social network become wider and wider. The way making friends differs from person to person. Among  joining a sports team, participating in community activities and traveling, I prefer to making friends by participating in community activities.

The first advantage is that we can meet a broad range of people through community work. People who attend activities may have different intersets and hobbies,different age and different major or strength that we can learn from. When a group of people, especially young people, meet with each other, they are provided an opportunity to find the guy he or she is intereted in or the guy he or she want to learn from. Of course, joining sports team we can find fresh and robust guy who have a broad knoledge about basketball, but chances are that we can only share sports-related topics with one another. As a member of  community activities, chances are much higher for us to share knowlege associated with different angles and fields. And people discuss similar interests tend to be friends later on.

As the community work moves on, strong friendship based on working experience can be built up. We all know work we engaged in is not always as easy as we assume. Sometimes obstacles and barieers are lied ahead of us which will not be overcome unless we cope with works hand in hand.The finished community work encompass all of our devotion, and throughout the process, strong and profound frienships founded. Take myself for example. I once joined a community and had difficulty in how to propogate our project to the whole campus and appeal students joining us. However, there was an intensive disagreement on making posters and other mangments. Finally, we made division of labor and allowed one only focus on his duty. I find out later our friendships strenghtens after  coordination.

Considering sports team and traveling, we can absolutely have fun and even get special team spirit from that. However, in my opinion, community work is far more complex than any of them, which means what we handle is challengeable and we learn more from that. Besides, after work, we can gain a strong sense of cooperation and this kind of awareness will also have a profound impact on our jobs in the future. At that time, we may think of the original team member of community work and say thanks to them.

To make a conclusion, while there are many ways to make new friends, participating community activity is the most effective one. It is an ideal platform for one to make friends, learn knowledge and gain experiences. Surely, friendships build on activities will last for a lifetime if we cultivate properly.

jacki1

0806 综合写作
TPO26
The passage talks about zebra mussel, a kind of shellfish native to Europe that is unstoppable in all of North America due to invasion and now poses threats to fish population in North America.However, the lecturer points out there are ways to control the spread of  zebra mussel and the threats on fish population is unclear.

First, the reading states that the spread is unstoppable because zebra mussel can attach its body to ship's bottom and thus can be carried by ships through transportation. On the contrary, the lecturer offers a solution to the problem: since mussel can only survive in freshwater, ships can leak out freshwater and instead use ocean salty water which is deadly to mussel.

Second, the passage states that zebra mussel dominate the new habitat with a high rate of reproduction and having no predator. But the lecturer disagrees with this statement because the fact that local birds here change their eating habits to trap mussel and also can eat a lot. So  the opnion that zebra mussel dominate is unlikely to be true.

Third, with regard to zebra mussels competing with plankton-eating fish proposed in the reading, the lecturer says that is not the reason cause the overall decline of fish population.  zebra mussel has positive impact on the fish population because it can produce a kind of nutrient which is useful to some fish and therefore raise the fish population.

时间用的相当紧，唉， 语言组织也困难， 笔记速度也跟不上来......

laneesherry

第一次帮人改综合写作，不足之处还望指出



0806 综合写作
TPO26
The passage talks about zebra mussel, a kind of shellfish native to Europe that is unstoppable in all of North America due to invasion and now poses threats to fish population in North America.However, the lecturer points out there are ways to control the spread of zebra mussel and the threats on fish population is unclear.

First, the reading states that the spread is unstoppable because zebra mussel can attach its body to ship's bottom and thus can be carried by ships through transportation. On the contrary, the lecturer offers a solution to the problem: since mussel can only survive in freshwater, ships can leak out freshwater and instead use ocean salty water which is deadly to mussel.（这里的第一点似乎没有写到点子上。原文是“First, the history of the zebra mussel，s spread suggests that the invasion might be unstoppable.”从历史教训来说，Z的繁殖是不可控制的。接着举了事实的例子说这是由于它留在船底云云。关键词是“history”。在lecture 里，教授反驳的话是：“True, the spread of zebra mussels couldn't be controlled in the past, but that's because people didn't have enough knowledge. ”关键词是“enough knowledge“，而不是用作示例的“Z在咸水中无法生活”。）

Second, the passage states that zebra mussel dominate the new habitat with a high rate of reproduction and having no predator. But the lecturer disagrees with this statement because the fact that local birds here change their eating habits to trap mussel and also can eat a lot. So the opnion that zebra mussel dominate is unlikely to be true.

Third, with regard to zebra mussels competing with plankton-eating fish proposed in the reading（第三点原因，原文是Z的竞争会使得本地鱼的数目减少，关键词个人认为是“reduce”而不是“competing”）, the lecturer says that is not the reason cause the overall decline of fish population( 在这里professor的原话是“It's true that zebra mussels may have a negative impact on fish that eat plankton. But on other fish, they can have a positive impact.”，所以说教授并没有全盘否认lecture的观点，而是认为它在减少一部分鱼的数量的同时也会使另外一些鱼的数量上升，原文这样讲是片面的。 ). zebra mussel has positive impact on the fish population because it can produce a kind of nutrient which is useful to some fish and therefore raise the fish population.


以上~
觉得楼主最主要的问题还是把“例证当观点”，以后要注意

jay871750293

8.6 独立修改~

sorry，亲，今天实习了一整天，刚改好昨天的文章

BTW，同样迷惑关于三选一的话题，之前没练过，完全不知道如何下笔+构思...

jacki1

0807 综合写作
TPO1
The professor disagrees with the opinion presented in the reading passage that partly  transition from five-day workweek to four-day workweek will cut companies spendings, change economic conditions and improve workers' lives.

First, he argues that hiring more staff to compensate for same amount of work will force companies to spend extra money on providing employees with training opportunity and medical benefits. More workers mean more office space and more work-used computers, all of which will cut into profits. So actually increasing companies' profits is almost impossible.

Second, for reducing unemployment rate, the professor says that the fact workload shifting to others doesn't work because many companies would rather expect employee do the same amount of 5-day work within 4 days, which renders no more jobs and unpleasant feeling for present workers.

Third, the passage states that lower wages and more free time means individuals can spend more time on accompanying family members and on interested activities. However, the professor points out that chances are that there are risks reducing life quality and decreasing job stability. For example, less time paid on work will make workers less competitive and less chance for a promotion. This is bad for workers to advance their career according to the professor.

jacki1

0807 独立作文
If you look at the history of recent decades, a huge fraction of the improvements in the standard of living have come because of the effective and efficient development of economy in many countries. These days, many people believe that nowadays it is rather easier to maitain good health compared with the past. For super advanced technology and medical facilities are available as well as highly qualified doctors. However, in my perspective, that is exactly the opposite of what is true. Let me explore that.

In modern society, with the big bang of massive knowledge, competion between companies and countries are becoming increasingly vigorous. To both while-collar workers and blue-collar workers, additional worktime is needed and thus cause a lot of pressure on them. You must have felt the acceleration of developmental pace of modern society when you see the swift flow of people in the subway stations. Busy work exerted on people means less time to spend on leisure activity and exercise. By the way, nowadays people tend to exercise less and just  sit in the sofa having enough rest because they are too tired. After a 10-hour working, I suppose no one would say I am still energitic and  not overwhemed at all!

We all know that US innovators bring us two indispensable things : the Internet and the personal computer, two of which have change our lives so profoundly. And until now, most of family has their own computers and access to the Internet. So compared with the past that we often go outside, we today are likey to choose to stay at home. Indeed, we use most of our waken time to interact with our personal computer. What I really want to focus on is  that the existence of PC and Internet has some bad impact. Internet right now has caused many disadvanges such as social isolation, obesity and depression. Let me give you one example, my friend Tony, a very fat boy, his favourate sports is surfing the Internet. He spends every waking hour in front of computer playing games. So it is not strange he is so fat and unhealthy.

Of course, I do agree that reasons proposed by some people that there are enough super advanced medical equipments and more experienced doctors and nurses. When one gets ill, he  certainly will ask hospital for help and then take pills regularly and have surgery etc. But none of these health care will make a difference unless people get something wrong with their unhealthy body. So it also proves that nowadays people tend to hardly easier maitain health than in the past.

In all, if you want to keep healthy, exercise more and going outside regularly, otherwise you will be harder to maitain health than in the past.

zengyuruo

亲，感觉你的作文句式和用词都挺好的。
句子结构上多注意就近原则，调整一下读起来更顺畅一些。
但是整个文章读起来比较空，论证较少。很多观点，读者可能并不认可，如果没有恰当的展开和论证，就比较难达成共识。多积累一些例证会好一些。

以上。

懒蜗窝

The professor disagrees with the opinion presented in the reading passage that partly ）（partly是副词 transition from five-day workweek to four-day workweek will cut companies（阅读里提的是company) spendings, change economic conditions (改变就业率不代表改变经济现状吧？会不会转述的有点不恰当？）and improve workers' lives.First, he argues that hiring more staff to compensate for same amount of work will force companies to spend extra money on providing employees with training opportunity and medical benefits. More workers mean more office space and more work-used computers, all of which will cut into profits. So actually increasing companies' profits is almost impossible.Second, for reducing unemployment rate, the professor says that the fact （that）workload shifting to others doesn't work because many companies would rather expect employee （to)do the same amount of 5-day work within 4 days, which renders no more jobs and unpleasant feeling for present workers.Third, the passage states that lower wages and more free time means individuals can spend more time on accompanying family members and on interested activities. However, the professor points out that chances are that there are risks reducing life quality and decreasing job stability. For example, less time paid on work will make workers less competitive and less chance for a promotion. This is bad for workers to advance their career according to the professor.
感觉楼主写的很好有很多值得学习的地方~加油！继续保持哟~