ChaseDream
搜索
返回列表 发新帖
查看: 1486|回复: 1
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[作文互改] [求批改]argument135求批改啊

[复制链接]
跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2012-10-10 20:39:42 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
Topic:
135/137/140
The data from a survey of high school mathand science teachers show that in the district of Sanlee many ofthese teachers reported assigning daily homework, whereas in the district ofMarlee, most science and math teachers reported assigning homework no more thantwo or three days per week. Despite receiving less frequent homeworkassignments, Marlee students earn better grades overall and are less likely tobe required to repeat a year of school than are students in Sanlee. These resultscall into question the usefulness of frequent homework assignments. Most likelythe Marlee students have more time to concentrate on individual assignmentsthan do the Sanlee students who have homework every day. Therefore teachers inour high schools should assign homework no more than twice a week.
Write a response in which you discusswhat specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument
and explain how the evidence wouldweaken or strengthen the argument. Attra 州的教育部建
议高中学生应该每天都被布置家庭作业。然而最近一项对于全州的数学和理化高
中教师的调查却对每天布置家庭作业的作用提出了疑问。在Sanlee 地区,86
的教师报告说他们每周布置35 次家庭作业,而在Marlee 地区,只有少于25
的教师报告说每周布置35 次作业。而Marlee 地区的学生综合成绩更好,而且
比起Sanlee 的学生更不容易留级。因此,我们高中的所有教师每周布置作业都
不应该超过两次。

Outline:
这个结论是荒谬的不可能仅因为一个调查报告就施行这个政策
首先这个调查是否可靠受访者是否如实的回答的问题结论是否受到了相关利益团体的影响
论者展示了两个地区的学生成绩的差异他的结论是根据两个地区老师布置作业的不同做法把一前一后出现的现象当成了因果关系这是一个在此之后,因此之故的逻辑错误为准确的判断论者的推理过程以下几个疑问需要证据两个地区的老师都像这个两门课的老师这样布置作业吗如果不是这两门课的老师的做法是否有代表性这两个地区的学生成绩的差异很有可能是由其他因素引起的比如Sanlee的学生成绩差是由于教育设施落后 经济不发达 学生基础较弱老师的整体水平不高 Marlee地区的学生成绩好 留级较少 是否是因为采取了不同的评分和升级的政策如过Marlee地区鼓励给学生高分 一般不对学生进行留级处分 以此来树立学生的信心Sanlee地区则刚好相反 则论者的结论就有问题
论者提到了两个区教数学和科学老师在布置家庭作业这件事情上的不同做法的影响 Marlee地区的学生没有家庭作业的负担 个人活动时间充足 Sanlee地区的学生每天都有家庭作业 但结果却是家庭作业少的成绩好 家庭作业多的成绩差这可能是个假象假如Marlee地区的学生没有家庭作业却把课余时间用在学习上 Sanlee地区的学生因为厌倦家庭作业而采取了消极的态度 这样的话两个地区学生成绩的差异并不是作业的多少而是学习的态度
  作者的结论有以偏概全的逻辑错误每个地区都应该根据自身的不同情况来采取措施教育学生


Text:

The conclusion is arbitrary. It is impossible to make a decisionon the base of such an convey.
  First we do not know whether the convey is reliable, whether theinterviewees answer the questions faithfully, whether the conclusion isinfluenced by some interrelated benefit organizations. The author should showsome introductions to prove it.
  The author showed the difference of the students` grade between the twodistricts. His conclusion is this appearance result from the divergence of the homeworkassignment of the two districts. The author regards incorrectly as thephenomenon of the tandem comes to appear as causal relationship. This is a logicmistake about it is the reason because it is the later. We need some evidenceto criticize the author`s conclusion. All of the teachers make the some homeworkassignment as math and science teachers in the two districts. Is it also berepresentative if is not all do like that the behavior of the teachers of thetwo lessons. Maybe the bad score between the two districts as a result of thefall behind of the educational installations, the underdeveloped economic, thelevel of the teachers. The good grade and the less repeat a year of school inMarlee may be on account of the standard of the graded and upgrade. Perhaps thestandard is loose in Marlee, they encourage teachers gives the high scores tostudents, they may be less easy to let a student repeats a year of school. Theymake such a policy in order to set up the students` confidence. But maybe it isopposite in Sanlee. The author`s conclusion is problematic if it is true.
  Then the author referred to the different practice treat to homeworkassignments of the math and science teachers in the two districts. That is, mostlikely the Marlee students have more time to concentrate on individualassignments than do the Sanlee students who have homework every day. Students inMarlee got good grades with the less burden of homework and students in Sanleeare not good grades but they should do homework every day. This is more likelyan illusion. If students in Marlee spend their after-school time on studyingvoluntarily in spite of they undertaken less homework. Otherwise, students inSanlee taken a perfunctory attitude because they were tired of the burdensomehomework assignments. So the reason to different grade between two districtsthat it is not only the frequency of the homework assignments but the attitudeto study.
  There are Overgeneralization of logic errors in the author`s conclusion.Every high school should take homework assignments according to their own situation.


收藏收藏 收藏收藏
沙发
发表于 2012-10-11 09:43:36 | 只看该作者
作者分析得很好,但是英文部分应该重新组织好。写英文不用于写中文,最好段落和逻辑结构很明显,有很概括性的开头结尾会加分。
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 立即注册

Mark一下! 看一下! 顶楼主! 感谢分享! 快速回复:

手机版|ChaseDream|GMT+8, 2025-8-13 07:52
京公网安备11010202008513号 京ICP证101109号 京ICP备12012021号

ChaseDream 论坛

© 2003-2025 ChaseDream.com. All Rights Reserved.

返回顶部