破个釜沉个舟，11.24要杀TTTTTT！！！！求狠狠劈！！

修一一 · 发表于 2013-10-20 16:02:44

10.19 独立作文 A\D students can get as many benefits from organization or club activities as they can get from their academic studies

It is universally acknowledge that there are a lot of organization activities and academic studies in colleges. Some people believe that academic studying is no doubt the most important thing we should do in college. While other people consider that we cannot emphasize the importance of club activities too much. As far as I am consider, both are necessary in our college life. But different students should take time to know into which category they fit.

Firstly, for students whose major are somewhat specialized such as engineering and accounting and medical science and so on, they need focus on their major because the knowledge they should master are technological and professional. Therefore they need more academic studies and they can get many benefits from them. The situation also could be applied on those pupils who are concentrated their grade. Take my brother Mike for an example, Mike studied engineering and he wanted to use his grade to apply for some postgraduate school; but he did not accomplish his goal because of his low grade in all of his four years in college, the reason why his grade was not enough is that he joined many club activities rather than studied his major.

On the other hand, I think students whose major is management and business can get more benefits from organization activities than from academic studies. An advantage of club activities is it will train people's abilities to communicate with other people, as a result of which, a person's confidence and experience will be enhanced. Because the humanities of a administer or a generalist is the strongest foundation for them to succeed, it is conceivable that academic studies are not as important as club activities.

All in all, as a college student, on no account can we completely ignore each one of the both aspects because we live in aworld where knowledge is accumulated exponentially and at the same time become more and more specialized and we need to fill ourselves with not only academic intellectual but also practicing experiences.

Aprilmi · 发表于 2013-10-20 16:24:04

好的，不过sorry，有点事可能要迟点才能帮你改了，顺便弱弱地问一句，那个A\D是什么意思~

修一一 · 发表于 2013-10-20 16:38:07

Aprilmi 发表于 2013-10-20 16:24
好的，不过sorry，有点事可能要迟点才能帮你改了，顺便弱弱地问一句，那个A\D是什么意思~ ...

木关系~ A|D 是agree or disagree 滴意思。。。

修一一 · 发表于 2013-10-21 16:16:28

10.21 独立 A\D the rules that the whole society today expect young people to follow are too strict

We live in thea world where knowledge is accumulated exponentially and at the same time becomes more and more specialized, so there is no denying that nowadays society bring out some stricts rules such as specialization and generalisation.

Firstly, specialization. Many area like engineering, accounting and medical science need specialists who are educated with technological and professional knowledges. These young men are often full of press because they must be always focusing the work they are handling to make sure the qualitified ratios. Take my parctice job in a mechnical factory for an example, when I firstly got my job allocation, I was been shocked for the details of my job. What I need to do is to measure a length of a frame of a product. However, I was a student who hadn't touched this type work before, so that it was conceivable that I was at a loss what to do. Even though I finally worked them out through others' help, I had to say what a strict job it was for a young man.

Secondly, generalisation. There is an increasing demand for people who are capble to see all of things of an area in a glance, people who are able to see the whole forest rather than trees, people known as generalist, especially in occuption such as administrater or manager. Today when young men are just graduated from university and walked into work place, the society make excessive demands for them to communicate with colleagues very well and to organize work and time perfectly. For instance, my friend Mike was admitted into a company last year, later he complained to me that he often critized by his boss because he could deal with other people and was unable to planning his own work very well wheareas he thought he had done his utmost to do his work. As far as I am concerned, most companies indeed have strict rules.

Admittedly, there are some aspects that society does not regulate strict rules such as ceremony and convention because our society has made a progress from the old customer.

All in all, I believe the rules of whole society are too strict for us young people. To make us better to work and more confortable to live, it is the time that society should concern about quality of our mind and life.

Aprilmi · 发表于 2013-10-21 22:05:24

终于改好了，楼主饶命~

Aprilmi · 发表于 2013-10-21 22:07:01

http://forum.chasedream.com/thread-877818-1-1.html 我的作文，谢谢！

修一一 · 发表于 2013-10-21 22:24:52

Aprilmi 发表于 2013-10-21 22:07
http://forum.chasedream.com/thread-877818-1-1.html 我的作文，谢谢！

好滴，木有关系，但我今晚貌似木有时间帮你改了，明天下午6点之前肯定会帮你改完哒~~

修一一 · 发表于 2013-10-22 15:56:12

Aprilmi 发表于 2013-10-21 22:07
http://forum.chasedream.com/thread-877818-1-1.html 我的作文，谢谢！

小伙伴，你的我已经改完啦~ 红色错误，蓝色建议，高亮是我觉得好的我应该学习的地方。
改的如果有错误要向我反馈啊~

Aprilmi · 发表于 2013-10-22 22:10:34

修一一发表于 2013-10-22 15:56
小伙伴，你的我已经改完啦~ 红色错误，蓝色建议，高亮是我觉得好的我应该学习的地方。
改的如果有错误 ...

谢谢了！楼主改的太好了！感谢！学习了！

yagiliang · 发表于 2013-10-23 00:13:09

不好意思，改晚了

破个釜沉个舟，11.24要杀TTTTTT！！！！求狠狠劈！！

本帖子中包含更多资源

本帖子中包含更多资源

本帖子中包含更多资源

所属分类: TOEFL / IELTS

正在浏览此版块的会员 ()