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Argument 14 处女作 憋的好苦啊 求大神拍砖!狠拍狂拍用力拍~~

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楼主
发表于 2012-7-26 15:59:40 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
The following appeared as part of a newspaper editorial.
“Two years ago Nova High School began to use interactive computer instruction in three academic subjects. The school dropout rate declined immediately, and last year’s graduates have reported some impressive achievements in college. In future budgets the school board should use a greater portion of the available funds to buy more computers, and all schools in the district should adopt interactive computer instruction throughout the curriculum.”




In this argument, the author concludes that school should buy more computers and adopt interactive computer instruction throughout the curriculum.In support of the conclusion,the author cites that the school dropout rate declined immediately after interactive computer instruction being introduced in Nova High school.This fact,coupled with the fact that the last year's graduates have reported some impressive achievements leads to the conclusion.However,this argument is unconvincing because it suffers from some critical flaws.

Firstly, the author's conclusion from the example of Nova High school's three academic subjects depends on the assumption that all school and all curriculum are the same ,and they could easily be adapted for distance learning program. The author unfairly assumes that all schools have the budget on effort to enhance its facilities like Nova High school does and all curriculum rife with data and theory. Yet, the author offers no evidence to substantiate this assumption.The author must show that all the curriculum including the ones that need actual operation,experiments for example,can be adapted for this instruction.Otherwise,the author cannot confidently draw any general conclusions about the necessity for schools to adopt interactive computer instruction throughout the curriculum.

Furthermore,the example of the Nova High school's three academic subjects cited is insufficient to warrant their truth because there is no reason to believe that the three subjects polled constitute a sufficiently large sample,and that the sample is fully representative,or the author cannot confidently draw general conclusion.

What is the most important is that the only evidence the author can offer to support the claim that the decrease of dropout and the achievements of last year’s graduates’ are owe to the introduce of the instruction is that both the decrease and achievements happened after the adoption of the instruction.While admittedly the adoption of the interactive computer instruction may be one factor of the decrease of the dropout and the increase of achievement,other factors that could result in the effect should also be considered and eliminate.For example, the improvement of the teachers' skills or of the quality of the students the school enrolled may also lead to the decrease of the dropout and the increase of the achievement.What's more,the evidence is insufficient to establish the claim in question because a mere chronological relationship in only one of the indicators of a causal relation and, therefore,does not necessarily prove a causal relationship. The author's failure to investigate or even consider other possible explanations for the example renders the conclusion based upon it highly suspect.

In summary,the author fails to validate the conclusion that school should buy more computers and adopt interactive computer instruction throughout the curriculum.To make it logically acceptable,the author should demonstrate that no other factors may contribute to the effect and that the data is convincing because it comes from a sufficiently large sample.Moreover,I would suspend my judgment about the credibility of the recommendation until the arguer can provide concrete evidence that all the school are affordable for the interactive computer instruction.
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沙发
 楼主| 发表于 2012-7-26 18:44:02 | 只看该作者
有没有大神帮我看看啊 马上要考试了 我知道有很多很多的拼写和语法错误什么的 求大神指导啊~~~~~
板凳
发表于 2012-7-29 09:36:29 | 只看该作者
第一次量就这么大,莫非装处?
地板
发表于 2012-7-29 09:58:09 | 只看该作者
模板很强,整个文章基本已经撑起来了。
第三段不如不要。

其实这个段子攻击点蛮多的:
交互式计算机授课是否作用于退学率下降和毕业生成就
是否所有课程都能得益于交互式计算机授课(这不是采样问题)
提高交互式计算机授课比例就要买电脑?
nova高中的经验能否通用与其他学校

还有其他的,比如有没有副作用,两年前的经验能否在今后试用,不过都比较弱了。

如果是限时的情况下,第一次能写成这样lz还是很有慧根的。
语法句法错误短时间也搞不定,而且我解读OG觉得这个不重要。
5#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-7-29 10:43:23 | 只看该作者
真的是处好吗…………主要不是限时写的 所以才能凑出这么多字数~~
6#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-7-29 10:44:34 | 只看该作者
我承认第三段是后加上去的~感谢指点~~~~~><
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