[心经] 回报cd，附英文老师对我作文的修改和建议

3月24号北美考的，我的成绩还没出来，感觉考得不好。即便如此，还是很感激cd的xdjm.机经写得不够全，还想把lg学校英文老师给改的作文跟大家分享一下，让大家看看美国老师的思路。

我用kaplan test2的 topic。先是我写的，然后老师修改的。

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Distance learning and online computer classes should replace classroom learning Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

I believe that classroom learning should never be replaced by either distance learning or online computer classes. Because traditional classroom learning offers us the opportunity to study under the directions of professional teachers, which is more efficient for our study. It also benefits us through the communication at classes with other students of different background and experiences.

It is out of question that we can learn more easily and efficiently under the directions of the professional teachers. Whenever we have a question, we can raise it at the class and expect a satisfying answer from the teacher promptly. If we study online, we are studying from less intelligent computers. Sometimes we can get an answer, other times it may come up with a totally unrelated answer, which might make us more confused. It is obvious that classroom learning competes over distance learning or online computers classes at this point.

Another reason why I prefer classroom learning is that it offers the opportunity to communicate with others. We can learn the ideas and views of others in the process of class discuss. We can also learn how to get along with each other and further build up a friendship between us. That’s exact what we need but couldn’t expect to get from an online class.

However there are also some advantages of distance learning and online computer classes over classroom learning. The advent of computers and Internet makes it possible for us to learn more convenient online. By learning online we could greatly save our time. We no longer need to drive a long way to school. What’s more, we can even set a schedule of our own. It enables us to study at any time we want.

So far, distance learning and online computer classes can’t replace classroom learning completely. To study more and study efficiently, we must go to the classroom to learn and communicate with the teachers and our classmates as well. However, distance learning and online computer classes could be a beneficial complement of the traditional classroom learning.

老师修改的如下

I believe that classroom learning should never be replaced by either distance learning or online computer classes. Because traditional classroom learning offers us the opportunity to study under the direction of professional teachers, which is more efficient for our study，benefits us through the possibility of communication with other students of different background and experiences.

There is no doubt that we can learn more easily and efficiently under the direction of professional teacher. Whenever we have a question, we can raise it at the class and expect a satisfying answer from the teacher promptly. If we study online, we are studying from less intelligent computers. Sometimes we can get an answer, other times it may come up with a totally unrelated answer. In this category classroom learning wins over distance learning.

There are also some advantages of distance learning over classroom learning. The advent of computers and Internet makes it possible for us to learn more convenient by online. We can greatly save time. We no longer need to drive a long way to school., and what’s more, we can even set a schedule of our own. It enables us to study at any time we want.

However, why I prefer classroom learning is that it offers the opportunity to communicate with others. We can learn ideas and in the process of class discussion. We can also learn how to get along with each other and further build up a friendship. That’s exact what we need but can’t expect to get from an online class.

At this point distance learning and online computer classes can’t replace classroom learning completely. To study more and study efficiently, we must go to the classroom to learn ; communicate with our teachers and our classmates is also an important benefit of face to face learning.Distance learning and online computer classes could be a beneficial complement to the traditional classroom learning.

老师说，他们喜欢把我原来的段落顺序变成12435，这样比较合他们口味。另外，老师说第一句话用什么开头，那么这个时态就要贯穿在整个文章当中，所以他把我所有的could 改成了can.

从上面可以看出老师把我文章段落顺序打乱了，他说他们喜欢看12435（对照原段落号）这样的文章，其中我们要反驳的，论述好的一面放在中间。

老师还说了,;的用法。，我不说了，主要说;

;用在有紧密关系的句子当中，“；”后的单词要小写。如果有and等连接词了，就不能用分号，要用,

恩，对的。谢谢山版。

我原来打算用word的编辑模式，贴过来大家就能看到哪里被改了，可是贴过来一看，不是那么回事。