[原创]我的第一篇TOEFL作文，有拍必回

 Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

When I was 12 years old, my family moved from Baoji, a small town in China, to the capital Beijing, which definitely changed my later life and benefited my future development. According to my own experience, I prefer to live in a big rather than in a small town due to the following reasons.

First and foremost, big city that is equipped with advanced and ample educational resource can guarantee a greater opportunity of accepting a better and more comprehensive education. That will, out of question, bring more opportunity in social survival. To make it specific, as I learn in the high school in big city, the content of computer class contains more advanced usage of computer and even the basic instruction to the computer language, all of which I cannot gain from the school in the small city. Plus, there are more useful and interesting classes, which are seldom cultivated in the small city, available for me to choose. So, to get prepared better to the further education in college, big city will virtually preferred.Additionally, big city can continuously add fresh challenges to our routine, which brings great excitement and enthusiasm to my personal life while small town fail to. Living in big city, I can meet with different kinds of people with varied backgrounds, even including foreigners. Those people can particularly break the current schedule of my life by establishing a new friendship, informing me interesting stories, and inspiring fresh thinking. Also, competition in big city is much more serious compared with the small town in which I can always be noticeable; consequently, the formal encourages me to try harder to improve my quality and capacity while the latter just turn me proud maintaining the ceased level.

More importantly, big city can provide myriads of convenient social circumstances, which makes the life more comfortable. Whereas, the limited resource in small town make many living demands rigorous and impossible and that we may need to cost much money. For example, living in big city, there is developed transportation system by which citizens can go anywhere they want to. But in small town each family needs to own their car to travel around fulfilling their business. Again, we can buy anything we want directly and quickly in the big city; contrarily, we have to travel a long distance to find the things we need, or even ask the relatives who will go to the big city to buy it for us. For that matter, the resource in big city guarantees a better living condition. 

After recorrection by myself: 
   

When I was 12 years old, my family moved from Baoji, a small town in China, to the capital Beijing, which definitely changed my later life and benefited my future development. According to my own experience, I prefer to live in a big city rather than in a small town due to the following reasons.

First and foremost,the big city that is equipped with advanced and ample educational resource can guarantee more opportunities and options of accepting a better and more comprehensive education. That will, out of question, bring more advantages for me to find good job offers and even fulfill my own demand and interest. To make it specific, as I learn in the high school in big city, the content of computer class contains more advanced usage of computer and even the basic instructions to the computer language, all of which I cannot gain from the school in small city. Plus, there are more useful and interesting classes, which are seldom cultivated in the small one, available for me to choose. So, to get prepared better to the further education in college, big city will virtually preferred.

Additionally, big city can continuously add fresh challenges to our routine, which brings great excitement and enthusiasm to my personal life while small town failed to. Living in big city, I can meet with different kinds of people with varied backgrounds, even including foreigners. Those people can particularly break the current schedule of my life by establishing a new friendship, informing me interesting stories, and inspiring fresh thinking. Also, competition in big city is much more serious compared with that in small town where I can always be noticeable. Consequently, the formal encourages me to try harder to improve my quality and capacity while the latter just turn me proud maintaining the ceased level.

More importantly, big city can provide kinds of convenient social conditions, which makes the life more comfortable. Whereas, the limited resource in small town makes many living demands rigorous and impossible and that we may need to cost more money. For example, living in big city, there is developed transportation system by which citizens can go anywhere they want to. But in small town each family needs to have their car to travel around fulfilling their business. Again, we can buy anything we want directly and quickly in the big city; contrarily, we have to travel a long distance to find the things we need, or even ask the relatives who will go to the big city to buy it for us. For that matter, the resource in big city guarantees a better living condition.

besides the language, I want to know whether the way I develop such topic is effective and cogent, thanks!
     
   

After recorrection by myself: 
   

When I was 12 years old, my family moved from Baoji, a small town in China, to the capital Beijing, which definitely changed my later life and benefited my future development. According to my own experience, I prefer to live in a big city rather than in a small town due to the following reasons.

First and foremost,the big city that is equipped with advanced and ample educational resource can guarantee more opportunities and options of accepting a better and more comprehensive education. That will, out of question, bring more advantages for me to find good job offers and even fulfill my own demand and interest. To make it specific, as I learn in the high school in big city, the content of computer class contains more advanced usage of computer and even the basic instructions to the computer language, all of which I cannot gain from the school in small city. Plus, there are more useful and interesting classes, which are seldom cultivated in the small one, available for me to choose. So, to get prepared better to the further education in college, big city will virtually preferred.

Additionally, big city can continuously add fresh challenges to our routine, which brings great excitement and enthusiasm to my personal life while small town failed to. Living in big city, I can meet with different kinds of people with varied backgrounds, even including foreigners. Those people can particularly break the current schedule of my life by establishing a new friendship, informing me interesting stories, and inspiring fresh thinking. Also, competition in big city is much more serious compared with that in small town where I can always be noticeable. Consequently, the formal encourages me to try harder to improve my quality and capacity while the latter just turn me proud maintaining the ceased level.

More importantly, big city can provide kinds of convenient social conditions, which makes the life more comfortable. Whereas, the limited resource in small town makes many living demands rigorous and impossible and that we may need to cost more money. For example, living in big city, there is developed transportation system by which citizens can go anywhere they want to. But in small town each family needs to have their car to travel around fulfilling their business. Again, we can buy anything we want directly and quickly in the big city; contrarily, we have to travel a long distance to find the things we need, or even ask the relatives who will go to the big city to buy it for us. For that matter, the resource in big city guarantees a better living condition.

besides the language, I want to know whether the way I develop such topic is effective and cogent, thanks!
     
   

I only read the first 2 paras. It seems there are some grammatic mistakes. You can review the points in ().

Read it again and find other grammatic problems first

好的

写了以后没有修改，不好意思

已经改过来了，呵呵！