slave918的作文贴

GJason · 发表于 2014-8-12 17:44:11

这篇不是你写的吧，和你的水平不符啊

slave918 · 发表于 2014-8-12 17:56:33

GJason 发表于 2014-8-12 17:44
这篇不是你写的吧，和你的水平不符啊

谢谢啦，就是我写的。。

slave918 · 发表于 2014-8-12 21:27:41

In 20 yeas, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today.

Car, as a major transportation, plays a definitely important role in human society. However, using of car has has three severely negative problems— which damage the environment of earth, decrease the efficiency of transportation and need to consume much nature energy in earth. Thus, we can easily reach at the conclusion that there will be fewer cars in use in the future.

The exhausts that cars emit, including carbon dioxide, undeniablely deteriorate the environment of earth. The increasing carbon dioxide lead to the global warming which deprives the homeland of vast amounts of animals and the souring sulfur dioxide bring us the acid rain which worsen the situation of trees and nests of many birds. Take the Antarctic as an example. Since the globe warming, the ice in the South Pole is melting in an aggressive speed, rendering that a slew of icebergs broken into pieces, the south bear need to take multiple efforts to find food, and the circumstance is not appropriate for animals to survive. The problems not only threaten the subsistence of animals in Antarctic but damage the whole biology system of earth. Due to the water melting from ice bergs, the ocean already cover some small islands, impelling the people living there to move to another place. Also, people need to use air condition more frequently, governments have to divert more money to deal with flood, and the acid rain impairs the appearance of buildings. Thus, we can see that the exhausts from cars not only influence the nature but also undermine the living condition of humans.

What's more, diminishing the using of cars would certainly increase the efficiency of transportation. We can already see that in metropolitan in China, the cars occupied every corner of a city, causing a host of traffic jams. Also, people goanna need enormous room to place their cars. In Bei Jing, the government already enforces some policies to control the numbers of cars, discouraging people to buy more cars and encouraging people to use mass transportation which is more efficient, such as bus, subway and etc. Mass transportation no doubt has more merits than cars, for it can transport more people, spend less time in certain distance and cost fewer resources like oil or space.

The last but not least, the energy, including the charcoal, oil and gas cannot support the using of car in the future. Since the speed we consuming these energy is far faster that the speed that the formation of these nature energy, the nature power would be exhausted within 100 years. Within 60 years, the nature energy would become extremely expensive due to its scarcity, people then cannot afford to run a car, even though the price of car is not high.

Admittedly, using cars is kind of convenient for us in current situation. However, using cars can't fulfill the future demand of humans. Since the 3 disadvantages of using car, in twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use that there are today.

GJason · 发表于 2014-8-13 13:58:09

1.字数很够啊，500多，词汇我也从你文里学了不少
2.有几处语法错误，需要注意。

slave918 · 发表于 2014-8-19 11:16:51

Admittedly, some movies and television may contain violence and sex which may misguide adolescent. However, we can see that movies and television still have many merits—which offer individuals some education, a new world to experience, and a simple way to relax.

Movies and television offer people a terrific way to learn. The story in the movies and television often convey the thoughts of editors. By extracting the gist of that story, audiences often can apply the experience of the protagonist into their real lives. Take my favorite movies, The Shawshank Redemption, as an example. Through the movies, the protagonist always show his positive attitudes to life, never give up in the most desperate situation and even remember to help others when he become totally free. Every time when I confront a dilemma in my life or on the edge of giving up, it is the mind of the protagonist that always cheers me up. Thus, we can see the movies and television sometimes better our lives.

Furthermore, movies and television enable individuals to experience a fictitious world. In authentic lives, people would play their own roles—somebody is accountant, somebody is waiter/waitress and someone is manager of a company. However, when people are watching movies and television, these entertainments provide us a new experience far from our real life, ranging from the ancient society to modern society. Take my favorite TV show, The Game of Thrones, as an example. There is a new world in that story, including dragons, white walkers, warriors and many fantasy creatures. It is purely exciting for me to imagine I am the protagonist climbing on an ice walls, killing my enemies to defend my lords, intriguing evil plots. On the country, I am an ordinary student without magic power in the real world. Thus, it is undeniable that movies and television permits people to get more experience in a fictitious world.

The last, watching movies and television is a fabulous way for people to get some relax. As for me, when I am swamped by my assignments or exhausted for preparing exams, the best way to relax is always watching Friends which is so funny. When I am enjoying the happiness of watching Friend, I often forget all the nuisance and totally released from all the pressures.

After rumination all the factors above, we can no doubt reach at the conclusion that movies and television are essential in our daily lives. We don't have to be so nervous to discourage adolescent to watch movies and television. They are just entertainment ways.

slave918 · 发表于 2014-8-26 18:40:51

Do you agree or disagree:
young people nowadays do not give enough time to help their communities.

The communities are places where we humans live, so it is really weired that nowadays young people do not give enough time to help their communities. Do they all show apathy to their commnuities? I don't think so. There are several reasons which could explain this phenomenen.

It is the current intensely stiff competition that hinder the ability of younth to care about their communities. After graduation from university, young people need to make a lot of important decisions in a very limited period. They gonna choose a career, eternal spouse and, etc. Their lives are just occupied and swamped by these things, so they can't engage themselves into caring about communities. For example, after I graduated from colleage, I found it is purely difficult to choose a carrer. The current undergraduates far outnumber the current positions that the companies offered to students. Not to mention some jobs like accountant, lawers, and doctors which requied an expertise. These professions are in a more stiff competition. At first, I became an computer scientist in a big company. Whereas, after 2 years, I just found out it is totally boring to me. Now I am concerning about the next job I should do. Thus, I really just don't have the time and energy to take care of my commnunities since I even can't take care of myself.

Furthermore, young people often don't have enough knowledges about communities. They don't know what field needs to improve, what part of government are responsible for certain problem, and what they can do to better the communites. Take my friend-Jim as an example. He is an outstanding computer science with the highest grades in my class. But what he knows has nothing to do with the communities. When we are looking the local news in the TV, sometimes we don't understand what they are discussing about. Once he wants to foucs on the topic about infants mortality, and he strive so hard to accquire some information. But it ended that we still are confused the derivation of the data, the department in govenment which is responsible for this field, and what questions do our commnities have now.

The last but not least, young people don't enjoy a good and virtuous environment of mass meadias. Often, the news of communites are not good informed. There are no details, including location, time and people. However, some other news for entertainment like eating, singing, or star affairs are usually mentioned details. Once, when I open the newspaper and try to read some activities in my communties. I find it is difficult to read. It is fiiled with words without an picture and there are no highlights information too.

Admittedly, helping our communities undeniably benefits everybody. But after rumination all the factors, we can easily reach at the conclusion that the young people do not give enough time to help their communities. But we should not just blame them, certainly there are some other problems in our society.

mygirlzini · 发表于 2014-8-27 14:48:31

1 连句比较丰富，篇幅也够
2 句子之间因果关系可以加强
3 建议多使用情态动词，程度，频率副词

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