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吉迈特作文贴,求猛喷(勿人身攻击)

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楼主
发表于 2013-8-11 23:05:23 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
0811独立作文 第一次写,开头结尾都不会,字数也不够,慢慢向各位大牛学习!
Different choose lead to various ways. In my opinion spending the money in investing in social activity for student after is wiser.

First of all, the social activity provides the students the chance to practice their skills such as communicate skill, team work skill etc. Each of these can help students to gain a better job. A survey about the relation between salary and social activity studied by PKU investigate 30,000 employee who has graduated from college in 3 year has conform it. The survey shows that 80% of employee in top 30% salary rank assert they had done a lot of social activity in the spare time in college.

Secondly, the social activity help the students to make more friends. In the social activity students can meet different people with different background, some of them may charming to you. The more friend you have the less possibility you will feel depress. Zachary is my neighbor, last year he had a hard time for his hard work and life. He is so shy to share his confusion to us. He looks depressed every day. Then he meets a friend called Jerry after he took the advice of his father Mike. Jerry is a fabulous listener. Zachary told every pieces of the worrier to Jerry and he feel good after that. Now Zachary is shining every time I meet him.

Admittedly, the good quality of food can make students feel satisfaction and stronger. However, the social activity experience can help students to gain more confidence in their study and life. With confidence around, students may get involve in class more, and they may not be afraid to express their opinions in class. My professor Tom told me the turn point of his life is the time the find the missing confidence. After that he felt he is strong enough to handle everything in his life, and he did it.

In a word, I think the money should invest in social activity for students after school.
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沙发
发表于 2013-8-12 19:54:17 | 只看该作者
从word中改的,再粘贴到帖子中就无能了,各种乱七八糟的,我上传了个附件,改的内容在附件了,还要麻烦你下载一下了,汗
写的思路挺清楚的,大家一起努力啦!!








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板凳
发表于 2013-8-12 21:04:45 | 只看该作者
呃 是不是因为我作文贴晚了你木有看到呃
我粘过来......http://forum.chasedream.com/thread-868294-2-1.html
地板
 楼主| 发表于 2013-10-10 20:21:01 | 只看该作者
10.10独立作文

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5#
发表于 2013-10-11 17:09:03 | 只看该作者
吉迈特 发表于 2013-10-10 20:21
10.10独立作文

详细的批改内容在附件中
红字是你写完自己修改过的吗?

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