twe85，拜求指点

这是小妹的第一篇文章，拜请高人给点意见。thx先

Topic 85

Topic 85

A foreign visitor has only one day to spend in your country. Where should this visitor go on that day? Why? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

To a human being, the main purpose of his or her trip aboard is to experience another culture, to meet people of another life style and to understand another way of life.  As a result, if I happen to have a chance to be a tourist guide of a foreigner, museums will be my top choice considering the limited time, say only one day.

To （for）almost all countries, museums are places where they (to) display important antique objects or heritages---we may take fossils for an example---either genuine or copied, as a means of showing the culture and history of the exact country.  With a lot more interests and knowledge than you could have imagined, museums are the best place to explore even for the local people, whose schedules are so tight that they cannot squeeze much time to travel around the country to know their own culture deeply.  So how can a foreigner lose such an efficient way to know a new country?

One single day will never be enough for one to understand a new culture in the round (around), which takes (makes) generations of experts to study.  To this extent, museums are definitely a much better choice because they show a brief idea of every part of the culture but, magnificently, cover a wide range of domains.  Within 24 hours, there is no chance to travel a long distance to appreciate the beautiful landscape and explore the vestiges scattered within the country. Take museums in to concern, I see no reason to bother to do such an all-consuming job.(We need not bother to do such an all-consuming job if our trip includes visiting museums)

Besides, museums are always located in big cities such as Shanghai and Beijing.  In consequence, the foreigner will also have a chance to meet bunches of local people, who he can talk with to know the people well,(建议修改) adding a vivid highlight to the one-day trip.

Concerned with all the factors, I firmly recommend museums to be the tourist resorts for a foreigner who only has one day to spend in our country.  He can scratch a general notion of the background of the culture through his experience in the museums.

谢谢，紫霞

不知道能不能提些建议，我好改进一下

整体不错，个别我觉得有些不妥的地方在文中已经标明了

关于理由方面，我觉得第一和第二的理由有重叠现象，希望能重新考虑，作作修改；第三条理由，可以多写几句。

期待你的帖子！