414夏雨霏霏的作文贴，求恨拍

夏雨霏霏

101203NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should encourage their children to do their schoolwork independently rather than help children to do their schoolwork.



An education issue which recently has been brought into the public focus is that whether parents should encourage their children to do their schoolwork independently or help them with it. So many people engage in this discussion. However, by now, we haven’t reached a satisfactory conclusion. When it comes to me, I believe that it is better for the children to do homework on their own for the following reasons.

First of all, as many teachers say, doing homework independently can help children check out the weak points in their study. Without the help from their parents, the children have to reread their book to find the solutions when they have difficulties in doing their homework. In this way, they can deepen their understanding of the knowledge they learn. When I was a child, I usually regarded doing schoolwork alone as a efficient way to test how I learned in the class and then reinforce my weak part. While, children may pay no attention to the problems they cannot solve if the answers can be easily got from their parents.

Another more subtle point we cannot oversee is that doing homework independently is a character-shaping activity for children. It is a process from which children can not only learn how to solve problem by their own effort but also build up the spirit of independence and confidence. Since children will leave the shelter of their parents one day, Independence and confidence are essential qualities for their future lives. According to a survey conducted by an education research project, the young adult who rarely get help from their parents tend to be more independent, more confident and more adaptive to the society. However, those who has been relied on their parents’ help since they were children claim that it is hard for them to live in a new lives, which require them to depend on themselves. From this survey, it is apparent that encouraging the children to do their schoolwork by themselves has long-term benefits to their future.

Of course, there is no denying that helping the children to do their schoolwork also has advantages. It is more time-saving. However, after all, the disadvantages far outweigh the advantages of it.

In short, encouraging the children to do their homework alone has so many merits that it even has favorable influence on the children’s whole lives. Parents should encourage their children to do their schoolwork independently.

夏雨霏霏

327 independent
Honesty is one of the most essentials qualities of human beings. Someone argues that we should be honest to others, especially those who are close to us, like our friends. However, is it possible that we can be completely honest to our friends? From my point of view, I hold a negative attitude for two reasons.

Firstly, we should admit that people have secrets, which they would like not to share with others. Sometimes these secrets may be so personal that we prefer to hide it in heart. Sometimes these secrets are so embarrassing that we prefer not to tell others, even our friends. Last semester, I failed in my auditing examination, although I had prepared it for a long time. Feeling ashamed , whenever my friends asked me about the result of the examination, I refused to talk about it or told them that it was so so. Telling them the truth was the last thing I want to do at that time.

Another point we cannot ignore is that under certain circumstance, it is unnecessary to tell our friends what our real thought about some unimportant things so that we can protect their feelings. One day my friend came to my in a new dress that she had dreamed for a long time. In order to buy the dress, she even found a part-time job. She asked my how she looked in the new dress. In my eyes, the dress was nothing special and I told her exactly what I thought. Immediately, the smile on her face disappeared. Later, she told me that she was hurt by my words that day. From this story, I realize that sometimes we should care more about the happiness and feelings of our friends rather than being honest to them.

Of course, the possibility that we may not be completely honest with our friends does not mean we can always cheat or lie to our friends. Only under certain circumstance can we be dishonest to them.
Considering what has been discussed above, we can conclude that although honesty is an essential factor in building a long-term friendship, it is still hard for us to be completely honest to our friends.

Lillian安

Honestyis one of the most essentials qualities of human beings. Someone argues that weshould be honest to others, especially those who are close to us, like ourfriends. However, is it possible that we can be completely honest to our friends（似乎不是用to?习惯用语be honest with 对...说老实话, 同...规规矩矩来往be quite honest about it 老实说）? From my point of view, I hold a negativeattitude for two reasons.
Firstly,we should admit that people have secrets, which they would like not to sharewith others. Sometimes these secrets may be so personal that we prefer to hide it（指代secretes是them?） in heart. Sometimes these secretsare so embarrassing that we prefer not to tell others, even our friends. （这里可以考虑加点举例子的标志词组） Last semester, I failed in my auditing examination, although I hadprepared it for a long time. Feeling ashamed, whenever my friends asked meabout the result of the examination, I refused to talk about it or told themthat it was so so（soso可以考虑换一下，not very good?虽然似乎我自己也常用= =）. Tellingthem the truth was the last thing I want to do at that time.
Anotherpoint we cannot ignore is that under certain circumstance（s）, it isunnecessary to tell our friends what our real thought about some unimportantthings so that we can protect their feelings（有点儿奇怪，换成in order to protect或for the purpose of…可能好点？）. One day my friend came to my (see me? Or my room/home?少打了吧= =) in a newdress that she had dreamed for a long time. Inorder to buy the dress, she even found a part-time job. She asked my how she looked in thenew dress（感觉语序可以换下，发问的这一句其实可以直接加到之前过来看我那里，还能多个长句少个短的= =然后说明这裙子来之不易的那句可以考虑变为让步句之类的：即使我知道……但我仍然告诉了她实话）. In my eyes, the dress was nothing specialand I told her exactly what I thought. Immediately, the smile on her facedisappeared. Later, she told me that she was hurt by my words that day. Fromthis story, I realize that sometimes we should care more about the happinessand feelings of our friends rather than being honest to them.
Ofcourse, the possibility that we may not becompletely honest with our friends does not mean we can always cheat or lie toour friends. （possibility有点儿奇怪，去掉the possibility that感觉好些，这样就是“我们不能做到完全怎样不代表我们可以任意怎样~~”）Only undercertain circumstances can we be dishonest tothem.
Consideringwhat has been discussed above, we can conclude that although honesty is anessential factor in building a long-term friendship, it is still hard for us tobe completely honest to our friends.
句与句之间可以考虑加点成分使叙述更为连贯，某些部分可以考虑加些连词并成一句，长短句交错比较好噢，另外我叙事无能= =，上面的建议选择性接受哈，不对的地方再探讨探讨

Lillian安

An education issue which recently has been brought into thepublic focus is that whether parents should encourage their children to dotheir schoolwork independently or help them with it. So many people engage inthis discussion. However, by now, we haven’t reached a satisfactory conclusion.When it comes to me（可以这样用么？我感觉奇怪，但我不能确定这个对or错）, I believe that itis better for the children to do homework on their own for the followingreasons.

First of all, as many teachers say, doing homework independently canhelp children check out the weak points in their study. Without the help fromtheir parents, the children have to reread their book to find the solutionswhen they have difficulties in doing their homework. In this way, they candeepen their understanding of the knowledge they learn. When I was a child, Iusually regarded doing schoolwork alone as an efficient way to test how I learned in the class and then reinforcemy weak part（and前后稍显奇怪）. While, (这个不适用于书面语)children may pay no attention to the problems they cannotsolve if the answers can be easily got from their parents.

Another more subtle point we cannot oversee is that doing homeworkindependently is a character-shaping activity for children. It is a processfrom which children can not only learn how to solve problem by their own effortbut also build up the spirit of independence and confidence. Since childrenwill leave the shelter of their parents one day, Independence and confidenceare essential qualities for their future lives. According to a survey conductedby an education research project, the young adult who rarely get help fromtheir parents tend to be more independent, more confident and more adaptive to the society（be adapted to？）. However, （用这个是否不太合适？考虑In contrast?）those who has(have) been relied on their parents’（word红了= =） help since they were children claimthat it is hard for them to live in a new lives(word竟然没红= =) which require them to depend on themselves. From thissurvey, it is apparent that encouraging the children to do their schoolwork bythemselves has long-term benefits to theirfuture.

Of course, there is no denying that helping the children to do theirschoolwork also has advantages. （可以考虑并成一句）It is more time-saving. However, after all, thedisadvantages far outweigh the advantages of it.

In short, encouraging the children to do their homework alone has so manymerits that it even has favorable influence on the children’s whole lives.Parents should encourage their children to do their schoolwork independently.
句间衔接需要完善~~~
光年来了可以再看看哈

晨依Jacqueline

TPO15 综合修改
The lecturer does not agree that the three methods stated in the passage will stop the spread of cane toad and she even points out that they may cause fierce environmental disaster.

Firstly, the lecturer says that even if national fence may prevent some mature cane toad from entering the region they have not colonized, it cannot stop the eggs and young toad that are able to flow with the water. As we all know, rivers and streams run from one end to another, then the young and egg be wherever in Australia.

The second method is also criticized by the lecturer. Lecturer figures out that the untrained volunteers will not only decrease the number of the cane toads but also capture and destroy the native fogs（frogs）, which can hardly be told apart from the cane toads, especially when they are young.

Finally, the lecturer rejects the third method as well. As she indicates, using virus will bring unexpected harmful outcome that the virus can be brought to the central and south（South） America where is the native habitat of cane toads by researchers and pet collectors. Under this circumstance, the cane toads will be endangered. However, the passage ignores this devastating consequence.

In conclusion, according to the lecturer, the three methods presented in the passage should not be implemented.
霏霏的作文写的非常好，三个要点都写到了，而且有的提供了细节，听的好认真~！赞一个~！然后我的一点点小建议就是语言方面，比如lecturer出现的比较多，可以换成speaker、professor、the listening等等增加一下多样性，晨依是吹毛求疵啦、、真的很佩服你哟~！

光年

Nowadays, aconflict between whether we should teach children to manage their own money isbecoming greater than ever before, especially when the financial crisisoccurred. It is undeniable that adult can help children to manage their moneyto establish good manner. As far as I am concerned, it is more important to educate children the importance of financial manage and letthe children to manage their own money at young age so that they can becomefinancial responsible adults? From my point of view,
First of all, it is indisputable that people build up their habit when they are young, and it ishard for them to change the habit which has formed. Have you ever heard of the story of the Jews? It is atraditional custom for the Jews to teach their children how to manage money.They allow their children to make their own decisions to spend the money,invest the money and even earn the money. In this way, managing money hasbecome a habit of the Jew and almost all the Jews have a subtle sense of money.No wonder that a majority of bankers in the world are Jews.
Admittedly ，the children are facing so much incentives to spend the moneythan before that it is urgent to teach them to manage their own money. Theadvancing technology brings out new shopping models and attractive products.More and more people are shopping online and a great number of them arechildren. The online shopping enables the children to buy things by easilyclicking their mouse. According to a survey conducted by the Consumers’ Association, more than eighty percents of children buy thingsthey don’t need when they are shopping online. Moreover, many childrenhave no ability to resist the attractiveness of the developed electronicproducts such as the Iphone and the Ipad that they always ask or even beg theirparents to buy them one. As we all know the prices of these products areusually high. If we teach children learn to manage their own money, they willrealize how wasteful to spend money in the way I mentioned above. Then they maybegin to learn to spend money more wisely. It is start for them to build up thesense of financial responsibility.

To put all in a nutshell, I believe building the financial responsibility is so important thatit can infect the whole world. After all the advantages overweigh thedisadvantages, we should teach our children to manage their money at young age.

夏雨霏霏

这篇写的我各种纠结阿
Famous entertainers and athletes have many fans who like their movies, listen to their songs and concern about their performance in the sports competitions. However, these fans not only care about the celebrities’ work but also are curious about their private lives. In order to satisfy fans’ curiosity and increase the sales of their newspaper and magazines, the professional paparazzi follow the entertainers and athletes wherever they go to dig the information about their private lives or even their scandals. However, the paparazzi have deeply affected the normal lives of these entertainers and athletes. I strongly suggest that the famous entertainers and athletes should have more privacy than they have now.

First of all, there is no denying that privacy is the basic rights for anyone. Even though the work of these entertainers and athletes offers them a lot of opportunities to expose themselves to the public, we cannot say that these people no longer have the right of privacy. As a proverb says ”We should treat others in the ways we want to be treated”, imagine how inconvenient our lives will be if we are followed by a stranger? If we do not want to live in such a kind of life, why should the celebrities be treated in in this way? I remember a actress once said in show that in order to reduce the probability that the paparazzi waiting outside take pictures of her, she never rise the curtain.What a pity life this actress has.

Another more subtle point we cannot oversee is that so much rumors about the private lives of these celebrities are not true and detrimental to their reputation. When these rumors are reported by the newspapers, the celebrities always have to face the pressure from the public and explain for something that does not happen . What’s more, these rumors can even pose a greater threaten to their career future. A example of this situation is that a actor lost many film contracts because a paparazzi spread the rumor that he was a drug addict.

Besides the points I mentioned above, the violation of celebrities’ privacy may results in unexpected and miserable outcomes. For example, it is said that the direct cause of the traffic accident that killed Princess Dianna is that Dianna’s driver was driving too fast in order to get rid of the paparazzi who were chasing after them.

In a nutshell, although the career of these celebrities is extraordinary, they still have the basic rights to protect their private lives and they deserve more privacy than they have now..

喵喵了个咪

Famous entertainers and athletes have many fans who like their movies, listen to their songs and concern about their performance in the sports competitions. However, these fans not only care about the celebrities’ work but also are curious about their private lives. In order to satisfy fans’ curiosity and increase the sales of their(and前后主语不一致media’s) newspaper and magazines, the professional paparazzi（复数paparazzo） follow the entertainers and athletes wherever they go to dig the information about their private lives or even their scandals. However, the paparazzi have deeply affected the normal lives of these entertainers and athletes. I strongly suggest that the famous entertainers and athletes should have more privacy than they have now.

First of all, there is no denying that privacy is the basic rights for anyone. Even though the work of these entertainers and athletes offers them a lot of opportunities to expose themselves to the public, we cannot say that these people no longer have the right of privacy. As a proverb says ”We should treat others in the ways we want to be treated”, imagine（imaging） how inconvenient our lives will be if we are followed by a stranger? If we do not want to live in such a kind of life, why should the celebrities be treated in in this way? I remember a actress once said in a show that in order to reduce（reduced间接引语我觉得应该用过去式）the probability that the paparazzi waiting outside take pictures of her, she never rise（rose同上） the curtain.What a pity life this actress has.

Another more subtle point we cannot oversee（改为overlook.oversee没有忽略的意思） is that so much rumors about the private lives of these celebrities are not true and detrimental to their reputation（我觉得这里是递进关系，可以用not only…but also…）. When these rumors are reported by the newspapers, the celebrities always have to face the pressure from the public and explain for something that does not happen . What’s more, these rumors can even pose a greater threaten to their career future(future career未来的职业生涯). A example of this situation is that a actor lost many film contracts because a paparazzi spread the rumor that he was a drug addict.

Besides the points I mentioned above, the violation of celebrities’ privacy may results in unexpected and miserable outcomes. For example, it is said that the direct cause of the traffic accident that killed Princess Dianna is that Dianna’s driver was driving too fast in order to get rid of the paparazzi who were（was主谓一致） chasing after them.

In a nutshell, although the career of these celebrities is extraordinary, they still have the basic rights to protect their private lives and they deserve more privacy than they have now.

总体来说还不错，只有一些小的语法问题。文章结构中规中矩，我觉得你可以相对调整一下你的模板。如果被考官一眼看出来是背模板的话，估计分数不会太高。

Lillian安

“While, (这个不适用于书面语) children may pay no attention to the problems they cannot solve if the answers can be easily got from theirparents.”
关于while，之前给忘了，觉得奇怪后问朋友得到的是上述回复，刚看书发现，这种用法是错误的而不仅仅是不适用= =|||
“while这个词的常见错误是把它当成句首副词用，写成while,…的形式，这样写的同学们明显是把它和However，…弄混了。请注意: while的后面一定紧跟英文，而永远不可能紧跟一个逗号” ----摘自《十天突破托福ESSAYS》

夏雨霏霏

402 independent
Nowadays, the intense social competition makes people live and work under great pressure. It is universally acknowledged that many people’s work bring about so much stress to them that they cannot endure. The following result is that their health condition is keeping decline.Facing this situation, many experts advocate that we should take time to relax with hobbies or physical activities that are very different what we do at work. Will this suggestion work? Many people doubt that. In my opinion, I think we should take this advice for the following reasons.

Firstly, let us think about whether it is efficient and healthy to work all the time without rest? According to a survey conducted by a research institution, it is impossible for a people to focus on one thing, for example their work, for a long time. The longer we work consistently , the less satisfactory outcome we will get. It is because our brain and body will definitely feel tired if we concentrate on one thing without a break. As the old saying goes ”All work no play will make Jack a dull boy ”. At this time, it is necessary for us to take a break and doing some hobbies and physical activities will be a good choice. Only in this way can our body and brain get a completely rest and be refreshed, a perfect physical condition needed by an efficient working. So we can say that in order to get our work done much better, we should take time to do some hobbies and physical activities that are different from what we do at work.
Another merit of doing hobbies and physical activities we cannot ignore is that those activities can offer us extremely precious opportunities to meet people from different areas. Meeting and communicating with people from different areas enable us to develop our interpersonal skills,which we should attach great importance to in the plural and fast-changing society. What’s more, we also get a chance to expand our horizon through this kind of communication. Using myself as an example, I meet a friend in a hiking club, who’s a manager of a sports- wearing company. We always hike together, talk to each other and share interesting experience. In this way, we have learned a lot from each other and when we are sharing thoughts, I can also obtain some valuable inspiration about life. This is a fantastic experience that we cannot get from work.
As something that can release us from the heavy work, something that enables us to develop social skills and make friends, something that provides us countless fun and joy that beautify our life, we have no reason to refuse to do the hobbies and physical activities that are different from our work.