ISSUE 81 球拍

DancingAme

81. All parents should be required to volunteer time to their children's schools.


Someone has said parents just need do their own job to afford their children's tuition, however, someone says  that parents should volunteer their time to children's schools. Which one is right? Which kind of education mode benefits the child most?
In my opinion, parents certainly should volunteer some of their time to their children's schools, but not all time.
 One one hand, parent's involvement in their child's education both benefits the child's studing and the relationship  between two generations.
Researches overwhelmingly demonstrate that parent's involvement in children's learning is positively related to achievement. Further, the research shows that the more intensively parents are involved in their children's learing, the more beneficial are achievement effects.Besides, parents involvement strongly influences attitude towars school or particular subject areas,classrrom behavior and motivation.
When involving in their children's learning, parents can also gain much. First of all, they can paticipate their child's growing,comunicating with them,sharing happiness and sorrow and guiding them when they are confused.Keeping knowing the changes of their children can avoid bad habbits ,bad friends and bad characters forming.And involving in their children's school advances the conection of the family members.
One the other hand, time of parents is limit, which is the main obstacle.Most of parents are busy in their own works,after all,they have to work hard to earn more money to feed the family.The divition of labor in society always leaves them few time to involve in their children's learning.It's true that parents are not all professional in educating, they may have difficulty in educating their children.For instance,when parents themselves have recieved little education,how can they educate their children well? Even if the parent is very good in some fieds, can he teach all subjects  well? If so, teachers in schools can retire now.So parents cannot replace the teachers in some ways.
Thus, to see the issue objectively,parents should volunteer some time in their children's school.What they should do is attending and helping,not really teaching them something ,but teaching them how to learn.Meanwhile, parents should play a role of assistant of teachers in schools.They can provide what is absent in school, vocation or culturing hobbies.A child's growing needs the force from shools and families at the same time.

普渡哥

Someone has said parents just need do their own job to afford their children's tuition, however, someone says  that parents should volunteer their time to children's schools. Which one is right? Which kind of education mode benefits the child most?

题目只说了后半部分。而且，业余时间到学校做volunteer并不影响赚钱养家吧。

竹林中人

很多的单词拼写错误，这个希望你写的时候更注意些，写完了自己也可以在word里面看看。
另外，感觉你的语言很多显得很生硬，完全影响了表达效果。那你自己读读，也可以感觉出来的，建议能多读些好的文章，比如新概念英语三四册的文章和OG的范文。
最后结构上，段首连接词很可以看出你的思路是不是清晰的，One one hand和One the other hand之间的两段段首建议加上连接词，显得文章结构紧凑。