小鱼儿的写作贴，欢迎批评，急需指正！

zyxiaoyuer

26号 独立写作 The main purpose for people who have jobs is for moneyrather than social statusIs it true that the main reason for people towork is to pursue the money but not the social status, as the statement assert?I don't agree that money is the only attractive thing to people who have jobs,social status and other valuable treasure that are brought by jobs are also thegood work driving forces.

First of all, it should beadmitted that money is really a good impetus and a necessary for people who goto work. Money is an effective factor to improve companies' productivity andworkers' activities. To pursue more and more money from job, people will trytheir best to improve their work skills and expand their abilities and get moresuccessful, it is good for a person's growth and it is good for a company andthe society economy development. It has been accepted by more and more peoplethat the more money they get from work, the more successful they are in the work.No mention that money is a necessity for people's life, people can improvetheir life qualities if they can get enough money from their work. Without it,people will lose their interest in jobs more or less, and the consequences willnot good.
However, money not means everything. Why people want to go to work?Different people own different opinions. Money is a good one, but other factors,such as social status, self-growth, social usefulness or some other personalreasons are also play important roles in people's interest in jobs.
As for social status, a lot of people still work very hard when theyare really rich and do not need to worry about money anymore. For these people,they want to get respect from other people, share their ideas with more people orleave more impact to the younger generations, one good way to do these is improvetheir social status. It is easy for people to know them when they are in highersocial status, their voice will be more soundly compared to the times when theyare not at so high level. Therefore, it is easy to figure out that socialstatus is important to them, and they will try their best to get to highersocial status through work. It is not so hard to find examples in human’shistory. Before many govern officers becoming known to more people, they evenreally successful at their former jobs.
What's more, some people just want to improve themselves when theypursue careers. Take myself as an example, I am very interested in medicinalresearch, I am just graduate, I want to practice myself when I am young, so Iwill choose a job that meet my interest even if it not offers so much money ornot  give me directed social statusimprovement.
Other people want to get some other things from their jobs, so theyview these things are their everyday’ morning clock, and take them as the mostimportant ones.
No matter what the reason that push people go to work, if it is goodfor people’s growth and good for society development, it is a good work reason.Not just for money or social status.

perfectends

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The main purpose for people who have jobs is for money rather than social status

Is it true that the main reason for people to work is to pursue the money but not the social status, as the statement assert?I don't agree that money is the only attractive thing to people who have jobs, social status and other valuable treasure that are brought by jobs are also the good work driving forces.(拆两句，否则就加连接词)

First of all, it should be admitted that money is really a good impetus and a necessary for people who go to work. Money is an effective factor to improve companies' productivity and workers' activities. To pursue more and more money from job, people will try their best to improve their work skills and expand their abilities and get more successful, it is good for a person's growth and it is good for a company and the society economy development. It has been accepted by more and more people that the more money they get from work, the more successful they are in the work.No mention that money is a necessity for people's life, people can improvetheir life qualities if they can get enough money from their work.(拆两句，否则就加连接词) Without it,people will lose their interest in jobs more or less, and the consequences will not good.


However, money not means everything. Why people want to go to work?Different people own different opinions. Money is a good one, but other factors,such as social status, self-growth, social usefulness or some other personal reasons are also play important roles in people's interest in jobs.


As for social status, a lot of people still work very hard when they are really rich and do not need to worry about money anymore. For these people,they want to get respect from other people, share their ideas with more people or leave more impact to (impact more on我只知道并且查了下只看到impact on，不太确定你的说法对不对，但是总感觉有点weird) the younger generations, one good way to do these is improve their social status. It is easy for people to know them when they are in higher social status, their voice will be more soundly compared to the times when they are not at so high level. Therefore, it is easy to figure out that socials tatus is important to them, and they will try their best to get to higher social status through work. It is not so hard to find examples in human’s history. Before many govern officers becoming known to more people, they even really successful at their former jobs.


What's more, some people just want to improve themselves when they pursue careers. Take myself as an example, I am very interested in medicinal research, I am just graduate, I want to practice myself when I am young, (Take myself as an example. I am very interested in medicinal research, and I am only a graduate stuedne. But I want to practice myself when I am young, ) so I will choose a job that meet my interest even if it not offers so much money or not give me directeddirect social status improvement.


Other people want to get some other things from their jobs, so they view these things are their everyday’ morning clock, and take them as the most important ones. 红色句没大看明白，且又出现了2个谓语动词.
No matter what the reason that push people go to work, if it is good for people’s growth and good for society development, it is a good work reason.Not just for money or social status.



有的词汇还是不错的，但是：

1.很多句子没有连接词，单独靠逗号连接一起。2.有的句子2个谓语 3.某些单词的用法掌握不准确