Duke essay 2: How will your background, values, and non-work activities enhance

NewLifeK

Helpful, thanks for your points!

Hey there!  Honestly, it would be a better idea to AVOID work in this essay.  While it wouldn’t be a disaster, read the question carefully—they are specifically asking you about NON-work activities.  So you could talk about work, but then…where else in the Duke app would you cover NON-work?  The safest play here is to focus on personal things here, extra-curriculars, etc.
Hope this helps, and good luck!

Jon Frank
Founder,
jfrank@mba2005.hbs.edu

-- by 会员 JonFrank (2010/9/18 13:06:47)

我个人不太同意Frank这次的看法。
从题目的问法来理解，
DUKE是在问How will your STORY enhance the experience of other MBA students and add value to Fuqua's diverse culture
这些STORY包括：1）background; 2)values; 3)non-work activities
non-work只是和backgound/value并列的一部分，并非Frank说的“specifically asking you about NON-work activities”

如果题目的问法是： How will your background, values, and OTHER non-work activities enhance the experience of other Duke MBA students and add value to Fuqua's diverse culture，那么Frank的理解就是对的了。。。

-- by 会员 NewLifeK (2010/9/18 14:30:16)

Thank you for the thoughtful response.  And I respect your opinion very much—technically, I even agree with it.  J  Duke doesn’t FORCE you to avoid work in this question.

But let me just explain a bit more carefully why you should avoid “work” in this essay.  Duke asks only three essay questions.  Most schools ask more.  Why is this important?  Well, because you don’t have many opportunities to create a compelling application for Duke.  And one of the best ways to be compelling, is to show that you are well-rounded., You need to prove that there is MORE to you than just “work.”  We tell all our clients, “Schools accept PEOPLE, not PROFILES.”
Why is this important?  Well Essay 1 will be entirely about WORK.  They ask about career path.  Essay 3 will be about Duke, and most likely, therefore about work.  After all, you want to go to Duke because you are international, interested in the non-profit sector, the professors you like are there, etc.  So now we have written two of our three essays mostly aboutwork.  This now leaves a third essay.  J
And if we can all agree that no application should be 100% about work, then this Essay #2 is your ONLY chance to show something other than work.  It is the only essay where you even have the opportunity to discuss extra-curriculars, your family background, etc.
So yes, technically, I agree with you.  The question doesn’t FORCE you to talk about things other than work.  But you would be very, very smart if you read “between the lines” of the question here.  Don’t submit 3 essays all about work!That would be a recipe for disaster!  Only submit 2.  That leaves Essay 2 as your only REAL chance to be about something other than work.

Thanks for the great comment, and I wish everyone the best of luck!



Jon Frank
Founder,
jfrank@mba2005.hbs.edu

-- by 会员 JonFrank (2010/9/19 10:01:43)

不详

read jon's comments! very insightful!

JonFrank

Thanks for all your comments, really helpful.
i have some rough ideas and also some concens, would appreciate your future comments:
1. we can write two pages for this essay, i plan to write two separate stories, how you think about this approach?
2. The theme of the two stories is to demostrate that i can share something about China to Duke students and enhance their understanding of China. Do you think this match what is asked in essay2?

-- by 会员 moonwalker (2010/9/19 12:31:55)

Hey there!  Great question, and of course I would be more than happy to answer it for you.  Lets go in order.

Two stories would be just fine.  But remember, two pages is a lot of text.  You might be better advised to tell three…or even four stories. You have plenty of space to do so, and as we have indicated, this is your only chance to talk about things other than work.  I would tell as many interesting stories about yourself as you can think of!
The fact that you are from China IS important—and yes, this would be the place to share it.  However, many applicants will be from China.  So if both of your two stories are about China, for example, you will be missing an opportunity.  Because that way, your essay wouldn’t differentiate you at all from any of your Chinese competitors.  If I were you, I would tell not two but THREE stories here.  Talk about THREE of the aspects of your personality.  Of those three, ONE could be about China.  But the other two should be about OTHER aspects of your background.  Were you born in a rural area?  Are you the first in your family to go to college?  Are you a world-champion Weiqi player?  Are you a world class gymnast? What ELSE is there about your background that you haven’t shared yet?  China should be part of this answer—but not the whole thing…

I hope this helps—good luck to everyone!

Jon Frank

moonwalker

Hi Jon,
Thanks for you great idea.
i was thinking once we describe our personalities, we also need to indicate how those personalities can add value to Duke community or Duke students.
i was wondering how "born in a rural" or "first in your family to go to college" can add value?  Appreciate your comments.

usocean

By seeing "from rural or first college student", the admission officer might, I guess, consider some characters such as diligence, persistance, reflected by the stories.

And I also have a question about Why Duke:
How admission officer weighs the answer to this Why Duke question? Thousands of people will mention the "team Fuqua", "diversity", and courses and clubs which actually is everywhere in other b-school.
I can say emotionally that I love beautiful Duke forest so much.....But I even not have been America before, is sound empty and totally not convincing, right?
How to move adcom and distinguish myself from other applicants?
Thanks, Jon !

JonFrank

By seeing "from rural or first college student", the admission officer might, I guess, consider some characters such as diligence, persistance, reflected by the stories.

And I also have a question about Why Duke:
How admission officer weighs the answer to this Why Duke question? Thousands of people will mention the "team Fuqua", "diversity", and courses and clubs which actually is everywhere in other b-school.
I can say emotionally that I love beautiful Duke forest so much.....But I even not have been America before, is sound empty and totally not convincing, right?
How to move adcom and distinguish myself from other applicants?
Thanks, Jon !

-- by 会员 usocean (2010/9/21 22:41:16)

Haha, yes you make a great point.  Do not talk about how beautiful the campus is if you’ve never been!  And sometimes, it is hard to prove that Duke is actually perfect for you.  But remember, you don’t need to be the ONLY person that says it.  You want to achieve two things:


1. Prove that you have done your research.  Name professors, specific courses, specific programs—they want people who have done their homework on schools.  If you can prove that, you are on the right track. Many students do NOT do their research, and the admissions people are rightfully offended by this.
2. Link their programs to your goals.  So don’t just say that you think it is beautiful—unless you are entering the fashion business, where things need to be beautiful.  Don’ttalk about their international approach—unless you are an INTERNATIONAL student, or unless you are from, well, China.  J  You don’t need to say that these are all things that only Fuqua has—you need to point to things that make Fuqua perfect for YOU.
I hope this is clear—and good luck!


Jon Frank

JonFrank

Hi Jon,
Thanks for you great idea.
i was thinking once we describe our personalities, we also need to indicate how those personalities can add value to Duke community or Duke students.
i was wondering how "born in a rural" or "first in your family to go to college" can add value?  Appreciate your comments.

-- by 会员 moonwalker (2010/9/21 15:33:52)

Sure, happy to offer some thoughts here.  If you were born in a rural country, for example, you would have special insights into the group of Chinese citizens who is in the processof the greatest migration in history, the Chinese migration from rural areas into Cities.  That could make you a great business person.  You could also have overcome a great deal in your life—having been raised eating just a cup of rice every day, self schooled, traveled two hours by foot every day to school, etc.  J  That is all stuff that builds character.  It makes it even MORE impressive, for example, that you got a 760 on the GMAT (for example.)  I went to Brown University, one of the best universities in the world.  So it isn’tthat impressive that I went to HBS.  But if I had gone to an unknown college, or no college, and if I were born in a small rural village, my getting into HBS would be even MORE impressive.

I hope this makes sense!
Good luck,
Jon Frank

flytiti

hi Jon,

Thanks for your suggestion

how about telling us how you would write this essay if you apply for Duke? just use stories before your MBA

No offense

seachina

But I have a question.

I am afraid that the i am not the only rural guy who applies to Duke. The Adcom have seen a lot of this kind of story...

My rural story is more touching, just as you discribe, but I think I should distinguish myself in other ways.

usocean

Thanks Jon.
Your suggestions are always impressive.