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悲剧的GMAT作文 -- 恳求大家帮忙分析一下

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楼主
发表于 2010-7-10 10:32:47 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
早段时间终于考完GMAT了,M50, V39, 730。成绩自己还满意的了。可昨天收到作文成绩后,真的如雷轰顶,只有3.5分!!!!
AI和AA的模板都是在前人的基础上经过我仔细的修改的,难道我被判抄袭了。我看了那么多XDJM只准备两三天就轻松上5分,我都准备了2周了,AI AA都各练习了5-6篇,问题出来哪里了?我个人感觉出在AI了,因为这个使用模板的痕迹比较强,AA因为都是逻辑性的东西,与别人相同没有什么好说的。大家帮忙来分析一下啊。

我想提交rescore申请了。

下面是作文题目:

AI:
"The value of any nation should be measured more by its scientific and artistic achievements than by its business successes.”  
我是采取各打五十大板的策略的,开头就复述一下作者的观点,然后指出其可取和不足指出,然后说我的观点是基础一下原因考虑的。第二段就是说作者的可取之处,这段的例子我承认是很单薄没有什么说服力;第三段就之处business success在衡量社会发展方面的重要性,而且是支撑scientific and artistic achievements的基础。最后一段基本是山峰的模板了。


AA:
“Across town in the Park Hill district, the Thespian Theater, Pizzazz Pizza, and the Niblick Golf Club have all had business increases over the past two years. Capital Idea should therefore invest in the Roxy Playhouse, the Slice-o’-Pizza, and the Divot Golf Club, three new businesses in the Irongate district. As a condition, we should require them to participate in a special program: Any customer who patronizes two of the businesses will receive a substantial discount at the third. By motivating customers to patronize all three, we will thus contribute to the profitability of each and maximize our return.”

也是根据山峰的模板修改而成的,涵盖了三种罪。

作者结论:Capital Idea should therefore invest in the Roxy Playhouse, the Slice-o’-Pizza, and the Divot Golf Club, three new businesses in the Irongate district.

反驳原因:
1. 事物是变化发展的,Across town in the Park Hill district, the Thespian Theater, Pizzazz Pizza, and the Niblick Golf Club have all had business increases over the past two years,不能得出今年或者未来就能持续增长。
2. 必要性,capital idea不一定非得投资新的公司,可以投资原来的三家公司,即Thespian Theater, Pizzazz Pizza, and the Niblick Golf Club 。
3. 无理假设:By motivating customers to patronize all three, we will thus contribute to the profitability of each and maximize our return。消费者不一定会买账这个program.
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沙发
 楼主| 发表于 2010-7-14 13:06:44 | 只看该作者
没有回复阿,我再顶一下吧。

不知道该不该去复议作文。

请N人们指点一下吧
板凳
发表于 2010-7-14 19:06:13 | 只看该作者
AA的三个反驳有套模板的嫌疑貌似,反正我觉得有点强加上去的意思...
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