狠批至上！

applesoforever

求狠批><

06.08写作24。。现转综合。。继续求狠批~~


*05.02  The parents spend too much time on determining future things of children. children can make choices by their own.

As the development of the society, the less children people have, the more time will parents take to care about them. Some perceived that adults spend varies time on their children. They considered children are capable of making choices alone. The statement should be talked case-by-case.

To begin with, not all children can make their choices alone. These children who have ever never faced problems alone are impossible to be indepent. They do not have their own thoughts, thus are confused when they caught a problem. For example, my nephew, a boy who never cares for his life such as what food he should eat when at a meal and which high school he should go. All these his parents will arrange for him. Now if I take him to a  vegetable market and ask him to pick up one to cook this noon, abosultely he has no his choice. Therefore children like my nephew, parents have to spend much time on deciding future things for them.

In addtion, if children have the ablity to make decisions for themselves, here is a question, then on what aspects parents should make decisions about future things for them? Colleges or marriage? Let's take colleges  for analynizing. For almost everybody college is a essential and vital part of one's life. When kids finished their high school part they got a score and had to choose a school to keep on studying. Parents have good experience and considerable understanding about most universities , they know how to choose a approriate school for their children. While children they are lacking of information about these universites. At this time, parents are supposed to determine for their kids. On the other hand, what if marriage? Since they have their own minds, they know what and how to make their lives more comfortable, they will absoultely know which type of girls they like most. If parents make decisions on this aspect, for their kids it have to be a miserable thing. Their children can not live in happiness.


In conclusion, parents determine things for their kids on separate parts.

applesoforever

tpo7 综合  晚上写

applesoforever

applesoforever 发表于 2013-8-27 22:51
tpo 19 综合

The buzzers should be banned in the reading passage, but the speaker in the listening p ...

第二点中消费者在面对buzzers时clear和怀疑的态度没写出来。。。只是用了一个词“不信任”带过  恩  注意 其余的思考了下 应该没啥问题  #自评#  

applesoforever

sherlock1992 发表于 2013-8-27 23:21
tpo 19 综合

The buzzers should be banned in the reading passage（这句是不是有些太突兀了，如果改成 ...

谢谢~~~

哪点木有听出来？？？望点明哈~~~

sherlock1992

applesoforever 发表于 2013-8-27 22:52
写好了~~~狠批啊亲！！！

tpo 19 综合

The buzzers should be banned in the reading passage（这句是不是有些太突兀了，如果改成the reading passage suggests that the buzzers should be banned会不会好些）, but the speaker in the listening part disagrees with the reading from three different perspectives.
红色修改 蓝色建议 高亮表赞
Frist, the man points out that the buzzers are tell（tell) the truth when facing with（去掉） consumers. In other words, uzzers（buzzers) will not lie to consumers even if they take the money from the company. Also, the company are only hiring(only hires) the ones who indeed have used their product and thought their product is acutually good wholeheartly. This is constracted(contradicts) with the reading passage that buzzers will mislead clients with incorrect information about the product only because they took(take) money from the company.

Second, the student(不是student而是buzzer) in the listening part states that the fact that clients will not trust buzzers instead of trusting buzzers which refered in the reading part. The clients will ask the buzzers many questions such as the price of the commodity and the service about it, also they ask how long they are able to use the goods. If the buzzers cannot answer one of questions, the customers will not buy the product.

Third, as the reading part points out the buzzers will make people mistrust with each other. The student in the listening passage points out that if the commodity does not bear a good quality, then the company can not hire a buzzer to announce it. In other words, the quality of the products that  buzzers annouced are good, so if the clients purchase the products, they will have a great experience, making them develop more trust with buzzers. Thus, they will open heart to people.

In conclusion, the man in the listening part states his opinion which is opposed to the reading part.  

小结：赶脚lapple的语法和时态有些不稳，需要加把劲，另外某些points某有听出来，建议apple听完之后对下listening的原文，并搞清楚哪部分是关键点。

applesoforever

sherlock1992 发表于 2013-8-27 08:13
apple, 你的TPO19呢？？？

写好了~~~狠批啊亲！！！

applesoforever

tpo 19 综合

The buzzers should be banned in the reading passage, but the speaker in the listening part disagrees the reading from three different perspectives.

Frist, the man points out that the buzzers are tell the truth when facing with consumers. In other words, uzzers will not lie to consumers even if they take the money from the company. Also, the company are only hiring the ones who indeed used their product and think their product is acutually good wholeheartly. This is constracted with the reading passage that buzzers will mislead clients with incorrect information about the product only because they took money from the company.

Second, the student in the listening part states that the fact that clients will not trust buzzers instead of trusting buzzers which refered in the reading part. The clients will ask the buzzers many questions such as the price of the commodity and the service about it, also they ask how long they are able to use the goods. If the buzzers cannot answer one of questions, the customers will not buy the product.

Third, as the reading part points out the buzzers will make people mistrust with each other. The student in the listening passage points out that if the commodity does not bear a good quality, then the company can not hire a buzzer to announce it. In other words, the quality of the products that  buzzers annouced are good, so if the clients purchase the products, they will have a great experience, making them develop more trust with buzzers. Thus, they will open heart to people.

In conclusion, the man in the listening part states his opinion which is opposed to the reading part.  

applesoforever

sherlock1992 发表于 2013-8-27 08:13
apple, 你的TPO19呢？？？

忘了。。。抱歉。。。马上写！！！

sherlock1992

apple, 你的TPO19呢？？？

applesoforever

lijinglol 发表于 2013-8-1 11:00
蓝色是建议修改，紫色是强烈建议修改，有什么不妥请指出>,

climate change..
恩 改得很好 谢了
马上帮你改~