【作文6.0小分队】范文分享，回馈CD，祝大家都杀G顺利

人间烟火Sue

鼓励大家每天一篇，不断的总结积累和练习，我会把我收集起来的所有范文全部发出来。

    1.   Citingfacts drawn from the color-film processing industry that indicate a

downwardtrend in the costs of film processing over a 24-year period, the author argues

thatOlympic Foods will likewise be able to minimize costs and thus maximize profits

in thefuture. In support of this conclusion the author cites the general principlethat "as

organizationslearn how to do things better, they become more efficient." Thisprinciple,

coupledwith the fact that Olympic Foods has had 25 years of experience in the food

processingindustry leads to the author's rosy prediction. This argument is unconvincing

becauseit suffers from two critical flaws.

       First,the author's forecast of minimal costs and maximum profits rests on the

gratuitousassumption that Olympic Foods' "long experience" has taught it how todo

thingsbetter. There is, however, no guarantee that this is the case. Nor does theauthor

cite anyevidence to support this assumption. Just as likely, Olympic Foods has learned

nothingfrom its 25 years in the food-processing business. Lacking this assumption, the

expectationof increased efficiency is entirely unfounded.

       Second,it is highly doubtful that the facts drawn from the color-film processing

industryare applicable to the food processing industry. Differences between the two

industriesclearly outweigh the similarities, thus making the analogy highly less than

valid.For example, problems of spoilage, contamination, and timely transportation all

affectthe food industry but are virtually absent in the film-processing industry.

Problemssuch as these might present insurmountable obstacles that prevent lowering

food-processingcosts in the future.

       Asit stands the author's argument is not compelling. To strengthen the conclusion

thatOlympic Foods will enjoy minimal costs and maximum profits in the future, the

authorwould have to provide evidence that the company has learned how to do things

better asa result of its 25 years of experience. Supporting examples drawn from

industriesmore similar to the food-processing industry would further substantiate the

author'sview.

blinkice

Mark一下！               

Iris飘

MMMM25

请问楼主考试的题目，和GMAT给的练习题目是不一样的对吧

MMMM25

kaito1412 发表于 2017-5-11 13:45
感谢分享！

我更想有人帮指出问题出在哪里，我怎么提高

kaito1412

感谢分享！               

梦之所及

感谢分享！               

MMMM25

Aspartame vs. sugar
People who use the artificial sweetener aspartame are better off consuming sugar, since aspartame are actually contribute to weight gain rather than weight loss. For example, high levels of aspartame have been shown to trigger a craving for food by depleting the brain of a chemical that registers satiety, or the sense of being full. Furthermore, the studies suggest that sugars, if consumed after at least 45 minutes of continuous exercise, actually the body’s ability to burn fat. Consequently, those who drink aspartame-sweetened juices after exercise will also lose this calorie-burning benefit. Thus it appears that people consuming aspartame rather than sugar are unlikely to achieve their dietary goals.

In this argument, the author concluded that aspartame does not contribute to weight loss as the sugar do. He manipulated two reasons to support his position. First is that high level of aspartame consuming will trigger more demand for food. Second is that sugar but not aspartame, if took after at least 45 minutes of continuous exercise, can help to burn the body’s fat. This argument is neither sound nor convinced for below reasons.
First, the author failed to compare comparing objects, or sugar and aspartame, on the same ground. Just as in his first reason he utilized to support his final conclusion, he just mentioned sugar’s benefit for weight losing. However, he explained nothing about aspartame in this aspect. Without this kind of direct comparing, this findings about sugar should be used as a cause to reach the final conclusion that aspartame does no help for achieving dietary goals.
Second, still focusing on the first excuse. The author said that high level of aspartame will deplete the brain of chemical that controls human sense of being full or statiety. One concern is how high level it is. Can that high level of consuming aspartame be too high to obtain in our daily live. If the level for aspartame consumption to cause brain to secrete the chemical is too high, as such 10 kilograms of aspartame consuming is the minimum amount for causing brain chemical, we will have more confidence to refuse this findings as one reason for author’s final conclusion.
Adding all analyses together, the author failed to compare aspartame and sugar at the same ground. He did not provide more information about high level for evaluating whether or not it is easy to get that level. So at the current stage, his final conclusion citing that consuming aspartame but not sugar is difficult to achieve dietary goals.

这是我这个作文万年4分的人写的一篇练习。 大神帮我看看，我该怎么提高

XTing

谢谢楼主！比心

人间烟火Sue

【44】

     The author of this article argues that the country of Sacchar can best solve its

current trade deficit problem by lowering the price of its main export, sugar. The lineof

reasoning is that this action would make Sacchar more competitive with other sugar-

exporting countries, thereby increasing sales of Sacchar's sugar abroad and, in turn,

substantially reducing the trade-deficit. This line of reasoning is unconvincing for a

couple ofreasons.

       In the first place, this argument is based on an oversimplified analysis of thetrade

deficit problem Sacchar currently faces. A trade-deficit occurs when a country spends

more onimports than it earns from exports. The author's argument relies on the

assumption that earnings from imports will remain constant. However, the author

provides no evidence that substantiates this assumption. It is possible that revenuesfrom

imports will increase dramatically in the near future; if so, the course of actionproposed

by the authormight be unnecessary to solve Sacchar's trade deficit problem. Conversely,

it ispossible that revenues from imports are likely to decrease dramatically in thenear

future.To the extent that this is the case, lowering sugar prices may have a negligible

countervailingeffect, depending on the demand for Sacchar's sugar.

       In the second place, increasing sales by lowering the price of sugar will notyield

anincrease in income unless the increase in sales is sufficient to overcome theloss in

income due to the lower price. This raises three questions the author fails toaddress.

First,will a price decrease in fact stimulate demand? Second, is demand sufficient to

meet the increase in supply? Third, can Sacchar increase the sugar production

sufficientlyto overcome the deficit? In the absence of answers to these questions, we

cannot assess the author's proposal.

       In conclusion, the author provides an incomplete analysis of the problem and, as a

result,provides a questionable solution. To better evaluate the proposal, we wouldneed

to knowhow revenues from imports are likely to change in the future. To strengthen the

argument,the author must provide evidence that demand is sufficient to meet the

propose dincrease in supply, and that Sacchar has sufficient resources to accommodate

the increase.