处女贴求拍砖！4.20二战，麻烦有空的同学帮我改改！~

annababy19994

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

      May be the idea of that it is more important to keep old friends than make new friens be accepted by some people.But as far as I'm concerned,making new friends is important as well as keeping old frends.
     
     For our teenagers,we may had friends when we were children and they also accompany us though we all are growing up.So there are abiding and sturdy friendship among us and there is nothing can break our friendship since we have a common memories.Undoubtly,the friendship between old friends are critical to us and we usually share sorrow,happiness with each other.The friendship is invaluable.For example,I have a best friend Sahra and we met each other when we were 2 years old because our mothers are good friends.For these twenty two years,our friendship are reinforced rather than faded away.Everytime when I have a problem which is difficult to cope with,she is the frist person who I come to mind.And she will give me some advice and always stand by me.Therefore,keeping touch with old friend is much important for us.
     
     Apart from keeping old friends,actually,we also have to make more new friends since the sociability are becoming the most important skill in present-day society.Making new friends brings us tremedous advantages.Firstly,we are supposed to have increasingly potencial oppotunities from new friends such as a decent job recommendation or a bussiness cooperation,etc.Secondly,it also can help us develop our socical skill by making new friends.Wouldn't a person become more social if he participate every parties?Finally,new friends can transform old friends as time goes by,there would be more friend help us if we had a problem can't solve alone.Thus having a great number of friends is not a bad thing.From my perspective,it is better for owing a lot of friends as far as we can.
     In conclusion,we should keep old friends but not forgetting to make new friends due to they are the same critical to us.


349 words

mr.ming

我的水平不好，但是希望把一些我觉得重要的东西的告诉你。
1写完作文要留1-2分钟读一下，修改一些拼写错误，像第一行的friend……还要修改一些简单的语法错误，像第三行的may had……自己再看的时候就会觉得很不可思议竟然有这些低级错误。所以我觉得最好留点时间检查一下咯。
2每个标点后面要有空格的，要不然改卷的时候会显示错误的，这样很不值得。
3最后的总结段落可以写长一点。丰富一下，不要简单一笔带过。除非时间不够。
4第三段写的不错，起码我觉得不错，总论点下分三个小的论点开展。

annababy19994

第一次有人回了我帖子，感激涕零啊！~谢谢同学，意见非常有帮助

annababy19994

mr.ming 发表于 2013-4-7 10:14
我的水平不好，但是希望把一些我觉得重要的东西的告诉你。
1写完作文要留1-2分钟读一下，修改一些拼写错误 ...

第一次有人回了我帖子，感激涕零啊！~谢谢同学，意见非常有帮助

mr.ming

祝你考试顺利！