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今天加入写作小分队 决心拿下T写作

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楼主
发表于 2013-4-9 17:23:24 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
今天加入写作小分队 决心拿下T写作
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沙发
 楼主| 发表于 2013-4-9 20:42:08 | 只看该作者
4.9独立Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:The government should support the scientific research even there’s no practical use.

With the increasing number of countries concerned for the development of scientific research. They spend larger amount ofmoney and energy to support the scientific research even it is no practice  use. However, view from my point, in someextent, government should responsibility fund limited resources to buttress thevalue research.

First and  foremost. The most significant means of the scientific research should benefit to common life,such as cure some serious disease, improve our environment. While spending numerous capital on useless research is a unwise decision. For example, last century, many countries, included developed and developing countries, focus on theextra-terrestrial research. No matter it is presence or not. This research can not take any advantage to public. This  measure can only cause the panic of public. What’smore, government dispend mass money, but without any reward.

Besides, if government extremely pay a attention to scientific research which is no practice use. It will influence the value research. Because scientist have to waste time and energy to dig into   the research, at the same time, inevitably,take less energy on the useful research. In addition, this kind of irresponsibility attitude of government could cause dissatisfied of the masses. And, ultimately, the authority of government will further lost.

Last but not the least, this apparently unvalued scientist researching whether cause bad imagine from naturally we do not know. But,if this kind of research what once cause bad consequence will unimaginable. For example, Albert Einstein invent nuclear. I can not deny that nuclear power changeour life and take many benefit welfare to human. But, undoubtedly, the bad imagine of nuclear explosion also bring public greatest disaster. We should not forget it. So, government  needs to take them into account.

In conclusion, I don not agree with the notion that government should support the scientific research even no value when consider the research waste time and energy, influence the value research,may take bad imagine to public. On the country, government should fund the limited resource on useful research.
板凳
发表于 2013-4-10 18:58:19 | 只看该作者
4.9独立。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

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地板
 楼主| 发表于 2013-4-10 21:29:20 | 只看该作者
4.10独立
One of issues is being talking between parents, whether or not limiting the hours of watching TV of movies in order to improving the performance of students in school. A number of parents say it is unnecessary. However, viewing from my point, I disagree with it. Limiting the hours of children watching TV is imperative.

First and foremost, children spent masses time on watching TV while inevitably occupy their studying hour. Further, it will impose their academic performance at school. It has been established by numerous samples. Just like my little brother who likes watching movies during high school, he obsesses in film so much even he cannot finish his courses. Finally, he had to give up attend college exam due to he dropped out of school. How sadness does he. But I am helpless as well since all the result from the reason that he cannot controls himself and wastes lots of time on it.

Besides, human energy is limited. If we take most of energy on leisure time, naturally, we cannot focus on the important things, like studying. On this point, I had tragic lessons. Recalling when I was I children in the middle school. All of our male students enjoy palying basketball and I’m not an exception. Once a time, I played basketball with my classmates with exhausted till go back home. So, I cannot concerned on my study with full energy. And I got a bad score in the tomorrow exam. This result not only punished by my parents, but also taking teachers medicines. From that time, I hold a good behavior that I firstly finish my home before playing basketball. And I benefit from it all the time.

Last but not least, over watching TV can make children influenced by people with bad behavior in the video. These behaviors will stick the children all the time. Such as, one of the famous movies called young and dangerous. The firm is ubiquity at that time. Lots of teenager imitate the character of the movie and do bad things, such as fighting, drinking, smoking, even robbing. Admittedly, the more time involve in watching movies, the more chance get bad imagine, especially for the younger.

In conclusion, after my ruminating all the factors, the time occupied by watching TV, the energy spending on study, the bad influence taken by negative character, parents limit the hour of watching TV is imperative.
5#
发表于 2013-4-11 11:10:38 | 只看该作者
4.10独立
One of issues is being talking between parents, whether or not limiting the hours of watching TV of movies in order to improving the performance of students in school. A number of parents say it is unnecessary. However, viewing from my point, I disagree with it. Limiting the hours of children watching TV is imperative.

First and foremost, children spent masses time on watching TV while inevitably occupy their studying hour. Further, it will impose(?用的不怎么恰当。impede) their academic performance at school. It has been established by numerous samples. Just like my little brother who likes watching movies during high school, he obsesses in film so much even he cannot finish his courses. Finally, he had to give up attend college exam due to he dropped out of school. How sadness does he. But I am helpless as well since all the result from the reason that he cannot controls(control) himself and wastes(waste) lots of time on it. (最后一句的表达有点问题,我很无助,因为太不能控制自己,helpless不怎么恰当。遗憾比较好吧)
Besides, human energy is limited. If we take most of energy on leisure time, naturally, we cannot focus on the important things, like studying. On this point, I had tragic lessons. Recalling when I was I children in the middle school. All of our male students enjoy palying(拼写) basketball and I’m not an exception.(时态) Once a time, I played basketball with my classmates with exhausted till go back home. So, I cannot concerned on my study with full energy. And I got a bad score in the tomorrow exam. This result not only punished by my parents, but also taking teachers medicines.(中式表达,results 怎么被published。I was published by parents due to the terrible academic performance) From that time, I hold a good behavior that I firstly finish my home before playing basketball. And I benefit from it all the time.(打篮球和看电视有区别,例子偏离。你可以说看电视会distract attention ,take up a lot of time。。。。。。)

Last but not least, over watching TV can make children influenced by people with bad behavior in the video. These behaviors will stick the children all the time. Such as, one of the famous movies called young and dangerous. The firm is ubiquity at that time. Lots of teenager imitate the character of the movie and do bad things, such as fighting, drinking, smoking, even robbing. Admittedly, the more time involve in watching movies, the more chance get bad imagine, especially for the younger. (bad behavior 和学习的关系点出来!)

In conclusion, after my ruminating all the factors, the time occupied by watching TV, the energy spending on study, the bad influence taken by negative character, parents limit(limitation on) the hour of watching TV is imperative.
语法。还有论证扣紧中心。其他都挺好
6#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-4-12 21:18:50 | 只看该作者
With the increasing sorts of the communication way was discovered. People can use different way to make friends. Which way is the best for a student to make friends, this issue is be taking sharply discussion, like join a sports team, participate in community activities or traveling? However, in my own perspective, I prefer to choose join a sports team.

First and foremost, the primacy rule to make friend is to find common interest. And basing upon this reason, I prefer to make friend when I participate in a sports. Take my best friend for instance. We meet each other when I play a basketball game and as the opponent. Although we see each other as an enemy in the basketball park, but we appreciate both sides since of our outstanding basketball skill, the character which not easily give up and the most important is the love to basketball. Just as an old Chinese saying, no fighting and no concord. After that time, we help each other no matter on life or study. In think all of it thanks to join the basketball game.

Besides, I think make friend should though a time to knowledge each other. And this time should not too short, because friendship built on the confidence. These factors cannot be provided no matter to according traveling or participating in community activities. As we all know, the people we meet during travel or activities cannot be know in a short time. May be the people is a murder or robber who was dangerous to us. There are so many examples has been tested. Numerous people was been killed during traveling or activities due to the loss of careful for stranger. I do not want repeat the history. Make friend with a person who I am not confidence.

Last but not the least, to make a friend by game is the convenient way for student. Because attending a community activities or traveling money is necessary. But reversely, student is the group which most lack of money. So joining sports is a way which not the best to us but may be the one most suit us. Viewing this part, why do we not do it? (这段实在想不出什么好的例子了队友给点什么好的建议)

In conclusion, after rumination all the factors, finding common interests during sports, protect   ourself, considering the problem of money. I deem to make friend through join a sports team is the best.
7#
发表于 2013-4-13 18:39:49 | 只看该作者
批改见附件。加油。。比我厉害多了

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8#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-4-13 19:31:57 | 只看该作者
4.13独立
With the increasing medical equipment and abundant living condition, public health condition should healthier than before. But, some matters, which reported by radio, was not same as our imagination. So basing upon this reason, I do not think it is easier to maintain health than in the past.

First and foremost, it is not uncommon that modern people lack sports than before. This is not the case but for most people. (我想说这不是个案而是对大部分人而言,不知道表达的对不)Taking collage students as an example, a while ago many video cover the news that some of the university canceled the long-distance race since of concern the college students situation cannot bear masses exercises. You may condemn the fear of university is overdone. But a similar tragic was certainly happened, some graduate student were died after they runned 5000-kilometers since of the fierce sport which their body cannot afford it. So modern healthy worsen than before.

Besides, there is other reason we also cannot ignored. Human is evolving as well as virus. So the stronger virus are also the biggest dangerous to our body. For instance, once H1N1 virus had caused big disaster to human life. But we depended on our advanced medical technology and the effort of medical personal, the virus was downed. However, recently, the stronger virus that called H7N9, which is the mutation of the H1N1, cause big dangerous to human health. And we cannot find affective measure to face it till now. Viewing from this point, human health is not no dangerous, reversely, human health is facing more dangerous.

Last but not least, although people can from a large number of various foods to choose, but the serious problem is food security. Food security is challenge public health again and again. We cannot forget the milk with chemical, meat with virus, egg with dye. And selecting everyone from it, it can gender bad influence to our health. Even we cannot recover from disaster which taken by food security. The Facing the food security all around, our health seem so fragility.

In conclusion, taken all the factors into account, public physical situation, mutation virus, food security problem, public is facing more serious problem than before.
求狠狠的批,帮忙找出我中式思维严重的地方啊!
9#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-4-15 13:07:42 | 只看该作者
4.14独立

Rich as the teacher attacked, the issue that if teacher as much as respected before has been heatedly discussed. Some people constantly think that teacher, as usual, is respected. But, in my own perspective, this is not the same as a few years age. It has been changed with the time going. It is true that teacher does not acquire much respect than before. Several points in different dimension will be demonstrated and explained to testify my hypothesis.

First and foremost, public idea of the teacher has been changed. Several years ago, teacher viewed as made great contribution to human, but recently it regard as just finish their own work. Just as so many occupation as well, it is a job without the different from others. Viewing from this point, it is necessary to outstanding do their work rather than to set them as an example. Without necessary, just because they are engaged in professional and overly adore them. So it is quite natural that teacher has not acquired much respect and admire than before.

Besides, people of the teachers which the bad and the good are intermingled, some of the bad one influence teacher image. With the developed international era, this bad effect once built, it will be enlarged and flowed and finally cause irreparable consequence. Taking a famous matter as an example, guomeimei, which is also called guopaopao. The teacher was escaping between wenchuan earthquake and ignoring the life of his students. After the earthquake his was be condemn by the whole society since he has the obligation to protect his students life when face dangerous. However, one of his words made us surprised again. He said, the only person who I would save when she being dangerous is my daughter, in addition, on one worth me do. Because one of extremely example cause bad image and teacher is no longer as respectful as before.

Last but not least, one of the important reasons is that teacher was not as rich as before knowledge. They are focusing on earning money, opening classes and so on. Taking fewer and fewer energy on academic, so teacher without extraordinary knowledge is naturally cannot win numerous prides. Walking on the street, you can see every kinds of cram school at every corner. This behavior which taking them large amount of benefits as well as damaging their reputation.

In conclusion, taken all the factors into accounts, I think teacher cannot receive much respect as usual is natural because public are changing their old idea, the bad behavior of the teacher hiding in the whole teacher, teachers’ ability of knowledge is falling.
10#
发表于 2013-4-15 17:52:53 | 只看该作者
4.13独立With the increasing medical equipment and abundant living condition, public health condition should healthier than before. But, some matters, which reported by radio, was not (as)same as our imagination. So basing upon this reason, I do not think it is easier to maintain health than in the past.First and foremost, it is not uncommon that modern people lack sports than before. This is not the case but for most people. (我想说这不是个案而是对大部分人而言,不知道表达的对不)(我觉得可以写成This is not only in a minority but for most of people.但是我觉得你之前的not uncommon就有这层意思了啊,common不就是暗示了人很多。。。。。。。 )Taking collage students as an example, a while ago many video(复数) cover(a while ago是不是应该用过去式?) the news that some of the university(复数) canceled the long-distance race since of concern the college students situation cannot bear masses exercises. You may condemn the fear of university is overdone. But a similar tragic was certainly happened, some graduate student were died after they runned(ran) 5000-kilometers since of the fierce sport which their body cannot afford it. So modern healthy(这个是形容词) worsen than before.(作者讲完例子了之后直接就总结说现在人的健康比以前恶化了,太快了有点,可以再加上一点比如说因为现在的这些政策导致人们缺乏锻炼,所以balabala.......)Besides, there is other reason we also cannot ignored. (把前后两句合成一句比较好,不然总起句不明显)Human is evolving as well as virus. So the stronger virus are also the biggest dangerous to our body. For instance, once H1N1 virus had caused big disaster to human life. But we depended on our advanced medical technology and the effort of medical personal, the virus was downed. However, recently, the stronger virus that called H7N9, which is the mutation of the H1N1, cause (与H1N1作对比的话写成cause a even more dangerous更有说服力)big dangerous to human health. And we cannot find affective measure to face(写成解决而不是面对会不会更好?) it till now. Viewing from this point, human health is not no dangerous,(这个地方原论断也没有说是完全没有危险只是说比以前少,这样说会不会太绝对了。。。。。) reversely, human health is facing more dangerous.Last but not least, although people (can from 这个。。。。什么意思,直接用People have a large number food to choose就可以了。。。。。)a large number of various foods to choose, but the serious problem is food security.(中心句略长。。。。。。)Food security is challenge public health again and again. We cannot forget the milk with chemical, meat with virus, egg with dye. And selecting everyone from it, it can gender bad influence to our health. Even we cannot recover from disaster which taken by food security. The Facing the food security all around, our health seem so fragility.In conclusion, taken all the factors into account, public physical situation, mutation virus, food security problem, public is facing more serious problem than before.求狠狠的批,帮忙找出我中式思维严重的地方啊!


太不好意思了啊楼主,现在才回,最近实在事情太多了,昨天到宿舍都熄灯了,就没来得及给改,下了课立马就回来改了,真是sorry啊。其实觉得楼主写得还是不错的,用的例子也很切合题目,建议就是写了例子之后最好再结合你这段的观点说一下这个例子说明了什么。思路也很清晰,楼主说中式思维严重的地方,额。。。这个我也不太看得出来,其实很多逻辑上的东西我觉得也确实需要写完之后再用中文理解一下看逻辑上是否对。词汇上也做得不错,楼主继续加油。
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