新G Issue1 求拍！！

zx9203 · 发表于 2012-11-15 10:01:08

题目是这样的：

1. As people rely more and more ontechnology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselveswill surely deteriorate.

With the development of technology,computers, mobile phones, cars and other high-tech products have becomeessential parts of our daily life. Human beings rely on technology to performcalculations of complexity, communicate with others, travel far and do anythings we couldn’t imagine 100 years ago. Many people argue that thesephenomena deteriorate our thinking capacity. However, I am against thisstatement for the reason that mankind are smarter than ever to create andoperate sophisticated machines.

In the first place, the benefit technologyoffers inspires people to think for themselves. Past decades has seen howtechnology is capable to change and improve human beings’ lives tremendously. Scientistsor even ordinary people are willing to ponder on better use of technology. Forexample, every year Microsoft Company invites customers to try their newproducts. Those who are invited write down how they feel and where expected tobe polished. Through this channel, Microsoft Company can encourage customers toreflect on using experience and come up with flashing ideas while promoting andbettering their products. This is a typical practice among many other high-techcompanies, sheds light on the important role of technology on stimulatingthinking.

Admittedly, technology has saved mentalwork and manual labor to a large extent. Given a complicated math problem, evena young child can work it out with a few keystrokes and a click on a button. Beforedeparture, you don’t have to rack your brain trying to find out how to transfermetros to get to the destination, an application on your mobile can plan thefastest routine for you. It seems plausible that to the technology’s credit, aperson needn’t to think for himself anymore. But this is presumptuous for thereason that technology has liberated people’s mind from trifles and made itpossible for people to think about more significant and revolutionary things. Ifwe are affixed to pettiness, no time will be available to meditate on ourdream, life and any other sophisticated but close-related things.

Still, some works cannot be doneautomatically by machines now; people devote themselves to searching forsuperior solutions. Scientific inventions do not simply spring out of the blue.They build on deep thinking and creative ideas. In other words, technologicalinventions occur as a result of human being’s thinking activity. An ancientGreek philosopher ever said that if we compare the known part of the world tothe space within a circle, the unknown part of the world around the circlegrows as the circle of our knowledge expands. Human beings are now begin tothink over things that have never imagined before with escalating level ofknowledge.

The above analysis thus leads to theconclusion that technology will enhance rather than deteriorate people’sthinking abilities because of its merits and unlimitedness. Our human beingsare not slaves or programmed robots of our inventions, but are masters and creatorof technology. It is obvious that the ability of thinking for ourselves willnever fade away with the advance of our own creation.

普渡哥 · 发表于 2012-11-15 11:02:39

段落间的逻辑关系不强，不够连冠，看看每句开头。

zx9203 · 发表于 2012-11-15 11:18:56

谢谢普渡哥，那要怎么改呢？能不能指点一二？

竹林中人 · 发表于 2012-11-15 14:07:51

With the development of technology, computers, mobile phones,cars and other high-tech products have become essential parts of our dailylife. Human beings rely on technology to perform calculations of complexity,communicate with others, travel far and do anything we couldn’t imagine 100years ago. Many people argue that these phenomena deteriorate our thinkingcapacity. However, I am against this statement for the reason that mankind aresmarter than ever to create and operate sophisticated machines.

In the first place, the benefit technology offersinspires people to think for themselves. Past decades has seen how technologyis capable（一般是be capable of） to changeand improve human beings’ lives tremendously. Scientists or even ordinarypeople are willing to ponder on better use of technology. For example, everyyear Microsoft Company invites customers to try their new products. Those whoare invited write down how they feel and where expected to be polished. Throughthis channel, Microsoft Company can encourage customers to reflect on usingexperience and come up with flashing ideas while promoting and bettering theirproducts. This is a typical practice among many other high-Tec companies, shedslight on the important role of technology on stimulating thinking.这一段你的分论点是inspirespeople to think for themselves，但整段内容最后看不到具体科技是如何激发人们为自己思考的

Admittedly, technology has saved mental work andmanual labor to a large extent. Given a complicated math problem, even a youngchild can work it out with a few keystrokes and a click on a button. Beforedeparture, you don’t have to rack your brain trying to find out how to transfermetros to get to the destination, an application on your mobile can plan thefastest routine for you. It seems plausible that to the technology’s credit, aperson needn’t to think for himself anymore. But this is presumptuous for thereason that technology has liberated people’s mind from trifles and made itpossible for people to think about more significant and revolutionary things. Ifwe are affixed to pettiness, no time will be available to meditate on our dream,life and any other sophisticated but close-related things.

Still, some works cannot be done automatically bymachines now; people devote themselves to searching for superior solutions. Scientificinventions do not simply spring out of the blue. They build on deep thinkingand creative ideas. 前面这句意思不明白In other words, technologicalinventions occur as a result of human being’s thinking activity. An ancientGreek philosopher ever said that if we compare the known part of the world to thespace within a circle, the unknown part of the world around the circle grows asthe circle of our knowledge expands. Human beings are now beginning to thinkover things that have never imagined before with escalating level of knowledge.

The above analysis thus leads to the conclusionthat technology will enhance rather than deteriorate people’s thinkingabilities because of its merits and unlimitedness. Our human beings are notslaves or programmed robots of our inventions, but are masters and creator oftechnology. It is obvious that the ability of thinking for us will neverfade away with the advance of our own creation.

新G Issue1 求拍！！

所属分类: GRE考试

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