本人基础不是很好，且刚开始复习GRE 作文，这篇是仿照范文写的，请GRE 作文功力深厚的朋友们帮忙给些建议～～ 非常感谢！
In this argument the marketing director suggests that Bardville should instituting a similar program like Avon company did two years ago to increase profits. The director describes Avon’s “Free Plays in the Park” program lead the company profits increased 10 percent. However, merely these facts could not prove that the proposed action will guarantee Bardville could gain its profits. In the first place,the director does not provide complete information concerning the actual cause of the decline in the size of the audience and in the overall profits. The director only informs us that although they increased the advertising , but did not attracting more people and causing their profits to decrease significantly. But what we are care more is that what actual cause of the decline in the size of the audience and in the overall profits? which is not mentioned by the director. It is possible that people are attracted by other companies and no longer interested in their shows. For lack of detailed information about the actual cause of the decline, we can hardly evaluate whether they could increase their profits without finding the true reason. In the second place, Does the 10 percent increase in Avon’s profits result from the “Free Plays in the Park” ? Basing on the mere fact that Avon’s profits increased 10 percent occurred after start a ‘Free Plays in the Park’ program. However, the sequence of the two events in itself does not sufficiently prove that the former caused the later. It is might result from other factor, such as there is an attracting new show arrived in Avon or Avon improved their features and services after ‘Free Plays in the Park’ program which leads Avon’s profit increased 10 percent . Without ruling out these possible scenarios, the director could not establish a causal relationship. Further more, granted that “Free Plays in the Park”program made Avon’s profits increased 10 percent. To evaluate the suggestion we should also ask that whether Bardville and Avon are comparable at every critical aspect? Bardville and Avon might be different in many aspects,for example, their target audience, the shows’ tickets price,their type of shows,etc.Before the director could address this critical question, we cannot determine whether Bardville could attain its objective through copying the program of Avon. It is understandable that a theater should struggle for its survival.But before the director could provide complete information about the actual cause of the decline in Bardville, and show clear evidence that Avon’s profits increase was due to “Free Plays in the Park” program and Bardville and Avon are comparable, we could not hastily conclude that institute a “ Shakespeare in the Park” program could help increase the profits. | 
京公网安备11010202008513号 京ICP证101109号 京ICP备12012021号
发表于 2014-8-14 16:28:57
收藏
收藏
