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[作文] A39 Bay City的餐馆问题 求拍

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发表于 2011-11-24 18:15:45 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
题目如下:
A recent sales study indicated that consumption of seafood dishes in Bay City restaurants has increased by 30 percent over the past five years. Yet there are no currently operating city restaurants that specialize in seafood. Moreover, the majority of families in Bay City are two-income families, and a nationwide study has shown that such families eat significantly fewer home-cooked meals than they did a decade ago but at the same time express more concern about eating healthily. Therefore, a new Bay City restaurant specializing in seafood will be quite popular and profitable.

攻击的点可以有:
1. 最近的海鲜食品的需求比去年上升30%并不意味着海鲜食物的市场变得很大
2. 全国对于双收入家庭的调查并不意味着Bar City同样适用
3. 作者同样忽略了其他因素:比如Bar City当地的餐厅数量很多而且对于海鲜食品的供应是否已经足够丰富;或者是否Bar City的居民的饮食习惯

1> 的海鲜食品的需求比去年上升30%并不意味着海鲜食物的市场变得很大(别的类型餐馆的情况> ),人们的消费增加了可能是由于人们生活的水平提高了,或者是海鲜的价格贵了,不代表吃的人多了,专营和不专营是不一样的概念
2> 对于双收入家庭的调查并不意味着Bar City同样适用(而且他们不愿意在家里吃也不代表他们愿意出去吃的是海鲜> ),而且他们的工资即使是双收入或者比较高,但是不代表他们能够经常吃的起昂贵的海鲜
3> 同样忽略了其他因素:比如Bar City当地的餐厅数量很多而且对于海鲜食品的供应是否已经足够丰富;或者是否Bar City的居民的饮食习惯

In this argument, the arguer recommends that a new Bay City restaurant specializing in seafood would be quite popular and profitable. To substantiate this recommend, the arguer cites some evidence that seafood is popular among Bag City residents and there is a big market in Bag City. However, careful examination of the supporting evidence reveals that none of them lend convincing support to the arguer’s recommendation.
First, a 30 percent rise in seafood’s consumption does not necessarily indicate that a sufficient demand of seafood in this city. Perhaps the real level of consumption might be very low and just a few residents in this city like eating seafood. This scenario is quite possible, especially considering that there are no currently seafood’s restaurants in Bay City. Lacking evidence that the real demand of seafood is very high in Bay City, the arguer cannot convince me that the restaurant specializing in seafood would be quite popular.
Secondly, even if there is a sufficient demand of seafood in Bay City, the arguer cites no evidence to prove that two-income families in Bay City eat significantly fewer home-cooked meals than they did a decade ago, though there is a nationwide study to prove that. Lacking such evidence, it is entirely possible that two-income families in Bay City eat more home-cooked meals than they did 10 years ago just because eat home-cooked meals come into fashion among two-income families in Bay City. Even assuming that they eat more in the restaurant than they did a decade ago, it is unreasonable to infer that these families will patronize a new seafood restaurant in Bay City. Perhaps they have their own favorite restaurant and do not want to go to a new restaurant. Or perhaps the existence restaurants provide myriad of delicious seafood and there is no need for the citizens to patronize a new seafood restaurant. Any of these scenarios, if true, would draw considerable doubt on the argument’s conclusion that a new seafood restaurant in Bay City would be quite popular and profitable.
Finally, the arguer fails to consider the relationship between revenue and expense and provide no evidence to prove that the new seafood restaurants would be profitable. Lacking such evidence it is equally possible that the restaurant’s cost of obtaining high-quality, healthful seafood might render it unprofitable though it might be very popularity. Without weighing revenue against expenses the arguer’s conclusion is premature at best.
In sum, the arguer fails to convince me that a new seafood restaurant in Bay City would be quite popular and profitable. To strengthen the argument the author should provide direct evidence that the demand of the seafood in Bay City is really high. To better assess the argument I would need detailed cost and revenue estimates for a new Bay City seafood restaurant.

真心求拍~
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沙发
发表于 2011-11-24 19:42:58 | 只看该作者
1.30%这个相对数字我觉得最好去质疑他的绝对量,比如说30%实际代表的是很少的量
2.你的第三条也可以表述为“人们消费海鲜增多并不代表人们会愿意去一家专门经营海鲜的餐馆,或许他们喜欢将海鲜和其他的菜一起点。
3.客观的说你论述的每一条最好简洁清晰点为好,长了多了很绕。
板凳
 楼主| 发表于 2011-11-24 22:21:52 | 只看该作者
哦 好的,谢谢了,我再改改啥的~
地板
 楼主| 发表于 2011-11-24 22:26:34 | 只看该作者
1.30%这个相对数字我觉得最好去质疑他的绝对量,比如说30%实际代表的是很少的量
2.你的第三条也可以表述为“人们消费海鲜增多并不代表人们会愿意去一家专门经营海鲜的餐馆,或许他们喜欢将海鲜和其他的菜一起点。
3.客观的说你论述的每一条最好简洁清晰点为好,长了多了很绕。
-- by 会员 竹林中人 (2011/11/24 19:42:58)


能不能具体说下哪个地方看的不太清晰抑或是哪个地方看的很不舒服,我真心想再改改·
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