A38羊毛大衣问题求拍！！

西园寺香芷 · 发表于 2012-12-27 15:37:09

There is an advice and a prediction in this argument.The author suggests a recovery of alpaca overcoat production and makes a prediction of high profit based on three reasons:a new fabric supplier,a potential extended market,and high price of the production.After close scrutiny,however,the evidence provided by the author is not enough for a sound conclusion,therefore further proof is required.

Firstly,the author recommends to resume production of the alpaca overcoat for the company now gets a new fabric supplier.However,is the new fabric the same as the old one or can it be used to produce alpaca overcoats of the same quality as before?No evidence is offered about this.The author also doesn’t show us any data about certain conditions of the factory.For example,does the factory has equipment required for fabricating alpaca overcoats?Are there enough workers that will be devoted to alpaca overcoat production?If these qualifications cannot be meeted,the company should not restart producing alpaca overcoat as well.In order to reach a sound conclusion,specific evidence is needed.

Secondly,the author predicts a hungry market for alpaca overcoat based on long-term no such coat to be sold to people.However,no alpaca overcoat in the market for long doesn’t nessecerily results in an urgent demand for it.After 5 years，maybe people don’t like such overcoat any more and this is just the reason for other companies’ not producing it.The author should show us reliable evidence to indicate a surely demand for alpaca overcoat.In addition,even there is a good market now,what about in the future,when other companies also find the alpaca overcoat proficient?Can the company still occupy the large market?Or the market will be lost since the participating of excellent competitors?Lacking of evidence to prove the company’s ability to hold a steady market,the conclusion remaind unproved.

Finally，the author’s speculation of high price of alpaca overcoat due to the fact that the price of most types of clothing has increased in each of the past five years is unreasonable.The high price of most types of clothing may be caused by a credence on the companies after long-time examination.Does the company also has such a fame among people ?If not,people would not be willing to buy alpaca overcoat produced by the company for its high price.So the author should provide reliable data about the companies’reputation in the market.Furthermore,high price might not result in high profit,for the high quality wool and the equipment required may cost a lot,therefore causing a decrease of profit.Further data and accurate calculation is need for a prediction of high profit.

The author suggests the company to resume alcapa overcoat production and makes a prediction of high profit doing so.Yet,lacking of enough data,the conclusion is unwarranted.In order to reach a sound conclusion,the author should provide more evidence about the market and the condition of the company and its competitors.
(60 min)
上次作文写得比较累赘这次试着简练了些（不知是不是这篇本身点没那么多的原因）
感觉单词还很不熟练，表达重复也很多，一些表达总是犹豫，导致用时较长。还经常忘记用第三人称有木有。考试前还要多练习几篇gogogo！

西园寺香芷 · 发表于 2012-12-27 15:38:07

A38
The following appeared in a memo from the new vice president of Sartorian, a company that manufactures men's clothing.
"Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high quality wool fabric, we discontinued production of our alpaca overcoat. Now that we have a new fabric supplier, we should resume production. This coat should sell very well: since we have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years and since our major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat, there will be pent-up customer demand. Also, since the price of most types of clothing has increased in each of the past five years, customers should be willing to pay significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago, and our company profits will increase."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

提纲：
1有新材料就可以重新生产
2有市场需求
3高价格高利润

普渡哥 · 发表于 2012-12-28 03:52:44

写的不错，但第一句话就出现语法问题。

There is an advice and a prediction in this argument.

is 应该是are吧。

西园寺香芷 · 发表于 2012-12-28 22:13:50

嗯谢普渡哥指点！

[argument] A38羊毛大衣问题求拍！！

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[argument] A38羊毛大衣问题 求拍！！

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[argument] A38羊毛大衣问题求拍！！