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要求被狠拍。第一次写作,自己觉得很散,写得浅,但又不知道该怎么改!

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发表于 2012-7-5 12:55:57 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
题目:Sometimes imagination is a more valuable asset than experience. People who lack experience are free to imagine what is possible and thus can approach a task without constraints of established habits and attitude.

The speaker said because sometimes imagination is a more valuable asset than experience, so the unexperienced people are more imaginable and they can approach task free from established habits and attitude. Admitedly, in some case, some person who lack experience may be free more to imagine and seemingly effective to deal with some task. However, in my view, the experience help people to imagine more completely and concretely.


At times, in some occupation, the imagination is do valuable than experience. With the fast development of economy and technology, more and more problem human faced need to be solve urgently. Such as global high temperature, extinction of some energy and pollution as well. The sciences who for the national benefit are commit to stay in experiment day and night need the imagination to single out the solution far from experience. Another one, those who have own some stubborn habits and attitude will surely be constrained when they meet the same matter again. They would use the way belong to themselves to look on. Since human with intransigent characture would like to accept the old ideal rather than new knowledge and they may be control their imagination to serve for their established thinking way.


In contrast, on occasion, experience help people imagination properly. First, It is impossible to achieve what you want just with infinite imagination. When one meet a problem, primarily, that what construct the whole difficult and where is the outlet of confuse and what the best solution relevant the just need is should be considered in mind rationaly and controlly. But if the imagination is powerful to suppose in everywhere that one could not easy to find the way out. Additionally, the experience help imagination completely and help people save time during work. On the one hand, the people who suffered failure in the experiment would avoid the harmful result. After passed though the sharp thorn road, one should know where the pit is and where is safe to pass, so he or she would not to walk into the pit again. When he stand on the same way, he would imagine every possibility good and bad, and search for the optimal way. On the other hand, the suffer save their time. Especially some experienced work not need imagination. For instance, in an industry the products need to be produced from some complex processes. A new worker may be spent 2 hours to accoplish the whole process, but to the worker so skilled that what is the time they need just 10 minutes. The more the work practice, the fewer time the process need.


Thus, every thing have two sides in different condition. It is that the imaginaiton is more valuable in some occupation. otherwise, it is still right to express that the experence is more important in other case. Although the world need high technology and imaginable man invent to meet human’s diversity need, most of people occupied in common vocation, what they expected just use their accumulated experience to make their life more comfortable.
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沙发
 楼主| 发表于 2012-7-6 12:04:07 | 只看该作者
那位仁兄仁姐帮忙指点下吧!…
板凳
发表于 2012-7-6 15:01:42 | 只看该作者
The sciences who for the national benefit??
are commit ???to?
说两点吧,一个是你的中间两段写的不够specific,用抽象的例子来论述,这事不太好的。再就是,为体现你对问题的深刻认识,你有必要再加一段,说明想象力和经验是并不矛盾相互共同作用的。最后就是你的结尾,不宜太长,短而有力最好。关于语言,注意一些基本的语法错误
地板
 楼主| 发表于 2012-7-6 21:39:26 | 只看该作者
谢谢你的指点,每次看范文觉得都写得好,但自己写就觉得很泛空,没有思想。
5#
发表于 2012-7-6 21:42:35 | 只看该作者
谢谢你的指点,每次看范文觉得都写得好,但自己写就觉得很泛空,没有思想。
-- by 会员 maliana (2012/7/6 21:39:26)

没事儿,会慢慢训练好的,多思考多发散
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