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[作文互改] gre issue142 求死里拍!!! 死了再拍!!!不死再拍!!!拍死为止!!

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楼主
发表于 2012-8-2 12:59:16 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
Claim: Colleges and universities should specify all required courses and eliminate elective courses in order to provide clear guidance for students.

Reason: College students—like people in general—prefer to follow directions rather than make their own decisions.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.





The allegation tries to build the relationship between university student's reliability to direction with eliminate elective course, and with specify all course. Of course, the specified courses provide students clear direction. So students know what to do first and what to do next, and what should not do. Students follow the direction and do not have to worry about how to choose courses. In this process, college directs students all along. What students need to do is just do their work according to the college schedule. Certainly, teachers in the college are likely to arrange the schedule reasonably and suitably and thus students can take their classes in proper order. So students may learn knowledge smoothly in the class of college. Since students may not know that some classes can only be taken after they attended certain basic classes. If you do not do it according to schedule, you may find some knowledge hard to understand in this class. There are also other classes that students may not know whether it is important, especially whether may be important or not in future, such as the basic law classes, because all of us have to obey law.

Author implies the reason why college must have to eliminate the selective classes is students would like to follow guidance rather than deicide on their own. Admittedly, college students, though they are adults, are not completely independent, they would like to resort to authority. They may sometimes hesitate in their decision, because they are not sure what is important to them, and so they may have many problems. Some rational directions may help them make good choices, and avoid making their mistakes in the university study.

However, students in college have their own ideas. Though many young may be confusing sometimes, they have their own dreams. They are interested in some areas, which the college schedule may not contain. No doubt interest plays a vital role in one's career and one's study. It is hard for us to imagine how a young man could finish a work without interest. If the schedule fixed up by school, some of classes may be boring and they will be less likely to take such classes. If they want to learn much, they find that they just cannot do that. They may also find that the class moves too slowly, because all classes have been fixed up. So students may pay much more time on cyber games, which have make so many students degenerate in university. So it may be harmful to fix the curriculum without selective courses in university.

They have their own interests in other subjects besides their major, such as computer technology and foreign languages, which will be useful in their career. since this subjects cannot be learnt from their major classes, the selective courses provide this chance. So the selective courses will benefits students in this by providing this courses.

While young man would like to follow the guidance of school, they do something for their future, and made their own decision. They dream of whom they want to be, what they want to do. In order to achieve something, they seek the best way to accomplish it. They may ask from other for advices, but they never do according to all of advice from other, for they know that other people never know much better than themselves, and other people seldom pay much more attentions to what they doing. They just have dreams and want to accomplish them, though they may make mistakes, but it does not matter, and they will finally correct them and make their life moves on smoothly and steadily.

School may able provides some information on how to choose their courses, but it is not a smart way to eliminate selective courses, because there are so many students have different characteristics, they have right to choose what they want to learn and decide what is most important to them, and they all have dreams.




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沙发
 楼主| 发表于 2012-8-2 13:34:56 | 只看该作者
student's reliability to direction with eliminate ----->student's dependence on direction with eliminate
板凳
发表于 2012-8-2 22:17:56 | 只看该作者
provide students clear direction。应当是provide sb with sth.
So students know what to do first and what to do next, and what should not do.这句话是不是太白话了呢
may learn knowledge smoothly,smoothly我觉得用的不太合适
they would like to resort to authority诉诸权威?
making their mistakes ??
建议LZ从下面两方面下点功夫
1:语言和段落的组织,文中有很多表达值得商榷,句子的组织不够严谨,显得随意。
2:多学习下范文。
PS;能否再附上提纲
地板
 楼主| 发表于 2012-8-3 07:14:40 | 只看该作者
谢谢竹林中人稍后附上提纲
5#
发表于 2012-8-3 10:30:52 | 只看该作者
School may able provides some information on how to choose their courses,

语法问题。。。be able to....
6#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-8-3 10:42:09 | 只看该作者
thank you Mr pudure
7#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-8-3 17:47:02 | 只看该作者
提纲:
1 大学学生有独立的 一面
2 大学学生也有以来的一面呢
3 必修课的利和弊
4 选修科 的 利和弊
8#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-8-3 17:47:22 | 只看该作者
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