ISSUE N13习作求拍

GALAAA · 发表于 2012-6-5 12:34:58

TOPIC: ISSUE13 - "universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student’s field of study."
WORDS: 351TIME: 00:30:00DATE: 2012/6/3 17:21:49

I agree with the author about that college students should be encourage to take a variety of courses outside of their field of study. with the booming of economy, politics and scientific, people are entangling in a more complicate world than ever before. in order to survive and develop, learn to adjust to different kinds of things are required, then a completely developed man are produced. the society needs these kind of people to develop.

first of all, it is no denying that people need a variety of courses in and out of their major to think and act creatively. people are facing more inventions than before. what accounts for this is the intertwine between different disciplines. this attests that people are thinking more conclusive than before. Take a variety of courses outside of their field can broaden their eyesight, active their inner interest to learn. in the process, they can find things they are truly interested in. once they are interested, they will pay more time and energy to it, and the other discipline knowledge will help them find a field new to them, help to solve problems that their major courses can not solve along.

On the other hand, without knowledge outside of our major course, we are narrowly confined and may lose interest sooner or later. if students focused only on their own field, it is possible that they will never make important breakthrough. It is always known to us that one discipline can supplement the other discipline's defect and do help to the other disciplines. for example, language learning is the most important of all the disciplines. How could a person solve a question before understanding the meaning in it? And mathematic is almost all the other discipline's foundation. without it, all the counting and calculating process will be inhibited. Interdisciplinary is between not only two but more disciplines to give us not only new knowledge, but also new way to think thoroughly.

nevertheless, we cannot unduly emphasize the other courses while ignore the major courses. when engaging too much time to knowledge outside of their realm shorts the time engaged to major knowledge learning. However, the major course is the most important in the whole learning process. only when you learn all the basic things in it can you make a whole vision on it, and do systematic decisions based on it. So, we could put most of our energy to our major courses, and at the same time take some proper courses out of our major field. this can give us a strong foundation and broaden vision to make benefit decisions to develop.

to sum up, it is important to take a variety of courses, it do good to not only the students, but also the discipline's headway. What is more important, it do good to the society's development.

zhouyue0223 · 发表于 2012-6-5 18:36:18

I agree with the author about that college students should be encouraged to take a variety of courses outside of their field of study. with the booming of economy, politics and scientific(science), people are entangling in a more complicate world than ever before. in order to survive and develop, learn to adjust to different kinds of things are required, then a completely developed man are produced. the society needs these kind of people to develop(看一下这句的语法和书写）（根据你第三段的论述，我觉得你最好在第一段点明要分清轻重，有重点的学习；而不是完全赞同作者的观点，又提出自己的观点）.

first of all, it is no denying that people need a variety of courses in and out of their major to think and act creatively. people are facing more inventions than before. what accounts for this is the intertwine between different disciplines. this attests that people are thinking more conclusive than before. Take a variety of courses outside of their field can broaden their eyesight, active their inner interest to learn. in the process, they can find things they are truly interested in. once they are interested, they will pay more time and energy to it（to？？）, and the other discipline knowledge will help them find a field new to them, help to solve problems that their major courses can not solve along. （这一段纯说理，显得不给力，最好能举一个实例，从你文章的字数看是可以扩展的）

On the other hand, without knowledge outside of our major course, we are narrowly confined and may lose interest sooner or later. if students focused only on their own field, it is possible that they will never make important breakthrough. It is always known to us that one discipline can supplement the other discipline's defect and do help to the other disciplines. for example, language learning is the most important of all the disciplines. How could a person solve a question before understanding the meaning in it? And mathematic is almost all the other discipline's foundation. without it, all the counting and calculating process will be inhibited. Interdisciplinary is between not only two but more disciplines to give us not only new knowledge, but also new way to think thoroughly.

nevertheless, we cannot unduly emphasize the other courses while ignore the major courses. when engaging too much time to knowledge outside of their realm shorts the time engaged to major knowledge learning. However, the major course is the most important in the whole learning process. only when you learn all the basic things in it can you make a whole vision on it, and do systematic decisions based on it. So, we could put most of our energy to our major courses, and at the same time take some proper courses out of our major field. this can give us a strong foundation and broaden vision to make benefit decisions to develop.

to sum up, it is important to take a variety of courses, it do good to not only the students, but also the discipline's headway. What is more important, it do good to the society's development（结尾感觉比你实际在文章中论述的要发散，要更深远一些，那么为什么不在第一段或者第二段论述中写进去呢？）
我觉得你的大小写需要注意一下。。。
然后就是你的结尾和开头都没有点明你第三段的观点，个人感觉那才是你的重点
建议是否把正文第一段和第二段放在一起，作为一个对自身发展的论点，把你结尾中提到的社会的影响单独成段，作为正文第二段

还有就是最好上传作文的时候把自己的提纲写上，我以前上传的时候都是把提纲写在前面，这给改作文的同学带来很大的帮助，我之前考G联系时在作文互改小组里面也是这样做的，而且版主每天要改比较多的，工作量也很大。。。。再者就是以后自己复习的时候看提纲也很方便。.

[作文互改] ISSUE N13习作求拍

所属分类: GRE考试

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