各位大牛帮忙知道以下小弟写的作文吧

我五月末就要考了，可作文还没怎么写过。这是我写的第二篇作文，希望大家能帮我找找毛病，指出我哪里该狠狠地改进。不胜感激。还有黄金80题范文的解压密码是什么呀？

AI NO.16

`Public buildings reveal much about the attitudes and values of the society that builds them. Today's new schools, courthouses, airports, and libraries, for example, reflect the attitudes and values of today's society.~

The argument above claims that today's new public buildings reflect the attitudes and values of taday's society. According to this statement some people hold the idea that the newly constructed buildings do reveal the attitudes of current society, nevertheless, the others prefer the constructions have no conspicuous relation with the society at that time. From my point of view, I agree to the former people, here are some reasons for my opinion.
  Firstly, let us tale a look at several examples. Do you still remember the two skycrapers in Manhattan in New York, if they still exist, the two famous constructions are also the advanced buildings, because New York government would like to show the high technique of the modern society. On the other hand, have you ever been to the Great Wall in Beijing in China. It is a construction built approximately 2000 years ago, the reason why the acient people it is to resist to the enemies who often attacked China at that time.From the two examples we can easily get that constructions built at different time have different usefulnesses, and reflect the values of the certain buildings in society of any time.
  Secondly, buildings vary from type to type, from culture to culture, reprenting the attitude of the designer and the society. Nowadays, more and more huge projects ask for designs to the public in order to choose one design which can reflect the attitude or the aim of the projects. For instance, the International exhibition center in Victoria port in Hongkong, whick looks like a bird flying in the sky. This comstruction is built just for the Hongkong's coming home China, and the design represents a positive attitude, just like a bird flying forword.
  From my argument above, we can draw the conclusion that today' new buildings do reflect two aspects of the society, the attitudes and values.

I think that you should improve your model especially the common style. My feeling is that your composition is like  what is required in toefl. The same model. A little bit simple.

As the experienced ones said,  have your model and practice more.