[求助]写的第一篇作文，请斑竹和高手帮忙改下

我写的第一篇作文，TWE的第7篇。这篇文章大概能得多少分？望斑竹和高手们指点。谢谢！

How do movies or television influence people’s behavior? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

Every human being tends to take some time off from his or her life for relaxation, entertainment and knowledge acquisition. No doubt that movies and television are playing as important role in our lives. Skimming through the history of human, there is nothing but movies or television can impact people’s behavior profoundly and penetrate lots of aspects of human’s life.

One of the primary impacts is that movies and television not only enrich our knowledge but also let people comprehend our country and the world. We can get international daily news from the television, which tell us Nowitzki won the NBA MVP award in 2006--2007 season, Beijing are preparing for the 2008 Olympic games, Indonesia occurred strong earthquake in 2007. My favorite program is discovery which shows us abundant knowledge. How to establish pyramid by ancient Egyptian? Does UFO real exit? Which kind of dinosaur is the most violent? We can find these answers from discovery.

A more subtle impact is that movies and television could change people’s world view and values. It attributes to the propagation of the television. I have seen a public welfare advertisement: a young man ran along a street, he found a can lying on the street, then he picked it up and throw it into rubbish without extra effort. Obviously, it tells us to keep our city clean and protect the environment of our earth where we live in. A simple television advertisement like this one always shocks the soul of everyone.

In addition, the movies and television also take negative impactions on people. As everyone knows, Hollywood produces a large number of violent movies which induce the people how to use gun, how to commit a crime, how to fight each other. Especially for the teenager, it makes them addict to smoke, drug, violence and so on. A gunman opened fire in a Virginia Tech dormitory and campus, killed 32 students in the deadliest shooting rampage in US history.

In conclusion, movies and television, by offering all kinds of programs to influence people’s behavior, we should pay more attention to positive movies and television while avoiding negative influences. We have to admit that the movies and television play a significant role in our lives. Let us enjoy the entertainment, information, experiences, relaxation and amusement from movies and television.