请各位帮忙看一下作文，感激不尽~

People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  After the graduation of the secondary school, most of the students choose to insist their study in colleges or universities. Here follows several reasons to explain why they select this way rather than others.

   For one thing, attending the university is access way for further academic exploration. Secondary education has offered us several subjects, say, English, mathematics, physics, geography etc. While for a multitude of students, these knowledge achieved from the senior school cannot fulfill their stomach. It is an urgent need for them to absorb more knowledge. There is not a better choice but get into the university. Higher education in the universities has settled a series of subjects. Students can choose the major according to their hobbies and in this way, they can learn the majors more professional and enjoyable.

   Additionally, universities or colleges has not only provide us further academic education, but also a good surrounding to communicate with others. Setting ourselves in the campus living atmosphere will make us known how to get together with others. As a member of the society, we should have the ability to contact with the others because communication is one of the indispensable capability for individuals. University, in some way, has taught us the lesson. It is just as a model society. Through the communication with other people we can achieve a lot. It will be benefit for our future life.

    Invariably, There exists a lot of challenges and opportunities in the campus. Explore them and try our best to work them out and at last, what we will get is not only the knowledge in the book, but also all kinds of necessary abilities which will benefit the whole life.

大家请帮忙看看，没几天要考了，有点着急

看完能给个分么？

跪谢~

啊~我明天就要考了...>"<... 看了一下你的文章﹐很清晰明瞭~ 完全沒有跑題~ (我是不斷地跑...T.T) 但有點小錯誤我用紅色highlight了。括號裡的是我的建議﹐有問號的就是我也不太肯定的~ 見諒一下lo~ 還有underline的是可以省略的詞/句子。

After the graduation of the secondary school (graduating from secondary/high school), most of the students choose to insist (continue/extend) their study in colleges or universities. Here follows several reasons to (that) explain why they select this way rather than others.

For one thing (firstly), attending the university is access (an effective?)way for further academic exploration. Secondary education has offered us several subjects, say, English, mathematics, physics, geography etc. While for a multitude of (many/ the majority of) students, these knowledge achieved from the senior school cannot fulfill their stomach. It is an (there is an) urgent need for them to absorb more knowledge. There is not a (no) better choice but (to) get into the university. Higher education in the universities has settled (provides) a series of subjects. Students can choose the major according to their hobbies and in this way, they can learn the majors more professional and enjoyable (in a more professional and enjoyable way).

Additionally, universities or colleges has (do) not only provide us (with) further academic education, but also a good surrounding (environment) to communicate with others. Setting ourselves in the campus living atmosphere will make us known (teach us) how to get together with others. As a member of the society, we should have the ability to contact (communicate) with the others because communication is one of the indispensable capability (quality?) for individuals. University, in some way, has taught us the lesson. It is just as a model society. Through the communication (communicating) with other people we can achieve a lot. It will be benefit for our future life.

Invariably, There exists (are/ might be) a lot of challenges and opportunities in the campus. Explore them and try our best to work them out and at last, what we will get is not only the knowledge in the book, but also all kinds of necessary abilities which will benefit the whole (our) life (lives).

大家一起努力吧~﹗﹗