作文 大家帮看看

我现在只有套摸板的水平  大家帮看看

Whether parents are the best teachers for children or not is a hot topic which has caused heated debate over a long period of time. There are many people who believe that is correct, but the others might not agree with them. If facing the question, I would probably follow the former one. In the following I would like to reason and provide evidence to support my viewpoints.

  
In the first place, the most significant reason for my view is that children imitate their parents from birth. Parents are the first teacher for the children, their behaviors affect children anywhere and anytime, so the parents’ influence on children is great. Facts present many examples as shown: When I was young, my parents always encouraged me. If I did something well, such as getting a high mark on my test, helping other people, my parents would reward me. If I did something wrong, such as fighting with neighbor’s kids, they would punish me. Therefore, I knew what should I do what shouldn’t when I was a child. Don't you think that the examples quoted above are very persuasive?

In the second place, parents’ meticulous care is another important reason that I have chosen to put here. It is no better illustration that can demonstrate the point, nobody loves the children more than their parents and parents take care of their children meticulously in any aspects, such as studying, playing and living. Although parents are not the most professional teachers, they are the most employable teachers. That is the reason why so many people consider that parents are the best teachers for the children. If you can see that, you can understand it more deeply.

Last but not least, an underlying factor is that parents teach us the basic skills.
From we (our) birth, parents taught us any fundamental skills including speaking, listening, reading, writing and basic sport skill. They taught us how to be a good person and how to communicate with other people. Therefore, the reasons that parents are the best teachers are very striking and obvious.

To sum up, given reasons discussed above, which sometimes intertwine to form an organic whole and thus become more persuasive, we can safely reach the conclusion that parents are the best teachers for the children, just because of the conclusion, we must respect and love our parents, not only they gave us life, but also gave us knowledge and wisdom.

楼上的...人家让你说意见也...

写的不错啊...

我觉得很不错啊，没有繁琐的修饰，句子很容易理解，条理清晰，是我追求的类型

向楼主学习

刚看了一段，蓝色表示楼主的lapses，红色表示我添加的地方：

Parents are the first teachers for the children, and their behaviors affect children anywhere and anytime, so the parents’ influence on children is great. Facts present many examples as shown（如果as是打算作介词的话，怎么可以后接过去分词？介词后接名词、代词、动名词才是呀）:（冒号后面的例子太凌乱，用first、second...这样才条理清楚，而且貌似后面只有一个例子，所以前面和后面的一个地方不要用examples啦。） When I was young, my parents always encouraged me. If I did something well, such as getting a high mark on my test, or helping other people, my parents would reward me. (楼主用would表达，语气显得十分委婉，但语法上没有错误；但如果楼主在这里打算用虚拟语气的话，语法是有错误的，因为过去情况的虚拟条件句是从句：had+过去分词；主句：would have+过去分词。因为前面有When I was young，显然后面是用过去情况的虚拟条件句，而不是现在及将来情况的虚拟条件句。楼主自己斟酌吧。)If I did something wrong, such as fighting with neighbor’s kids, they would punish me. Therefore, I knew what should I（楼主得用陈述句的语序） do and what shouldn’t when I was a child. Don't you think that the examples quoted above are very persuasive?（这个有可能更好一点： The examples quoted above are extremely persuasive, aren't they?）

谢谢大家  我的语法真的很成问题  还要多加练习

对不起，我不是想打击你，只是我也有点疑问。我GMAT考试的时候就用了这个摸板（当时这个摸板是高分作文修改过的），写了很多字，结果拿了3。5分，我自己都不敢相信，比我第一次G考试的4。5分（那时就没怎么复习，基本就是原始水平了）还要底，后来我现在复习托福，看了它的OG里面的关于作文的就说了EST不要看到一些废话的东西，然后我才发现里面的例子就很象我的摸板（也就是跟你的开头很相似）

所以我现在就很纳闷为什么现在还有很多人说要弄一个凑字的摸板，是不是很多人都这样也拿了高分啊？