twe一篇，请多多指教！

这篇我明显感觉的自己的字数不够，在specific details 这一点上，我觉得很困难啊！请大家多帮帮我！谢谢了！

Topic 150:do you agree or disagree with the following statements?Watching television is bad for children.Use specific details and examples to support your answer.

I do strongly disagree with the statement that watching television is bad for children.Television ,as one of the most significant invention in the twentieth century,do have a great effect on people's daily lives.And especiallyfor children ,who are the future of the world,the influnce seems to be never exaggerated.

The main reason for which I disagree with the statement,is that television has become the most common media to transfer information to people.And young naive children would easily learn the knowledge sent by television because it is more enjoyable to learn with moving pictures,coloful images and lovely sounds.and many pieces of information showed on television are not available on books.

Secondly,in stead of really being there,television can bring children to different places and experience different cultures.The Pompidou Centre in France will show them the most fancy art works in the world.The Colosseum in Italy will remind them how great the Rome Empire used to be.Children  edified bydifferent cultures are more likely to appreciate the human history handed down by the ancestors

As is know,children enjoy playing and having funl.Cartoons showed on television are their favourite.After a long-time textbook study,it is cartoons that make children relax and have a good time.They will work more efficiently and more happily after watching cartoons.

Some people may argue that television takes too much time away from children and some of them are even involved in it,forgeting about their own study.I would say that like a coin has two sides,television has both advantages and disadvantages.However,the advantages of television are far beyond the disadvantages.Rather than bad for children,television can become a good friend with children's studies and daily lives.

the most significant invention(inventions)

"do have a great effect on people's daily lives.And especiallyfor children"好像少主语~

And especiallyfor children ,who are the future of the world,the influnce seems to be never exaggerated.在the influence前面少连词。

and many pieces of information showed on television are not available on books.建议把and换成“further more,or additionally"

to different places and experience different cultures 这句话少了些东东

As is know（known)

Cartoons showed on television are their favourite.这句话前面加上“for instance"之类的话。

it is cartoons that make children relax and have a good time.They will work more efficiently and more happily after watching cartoons.恩。。。可以这样说：With cartoons watched, children will work more efficiently and more happliy in that watching cartoons can make them relax and have a good time.

恩。。。写作文的时候一定要注意语法错误，三处就是1分阿~be careful.

恩，好的，谢谢你！

我10月就要考了，现在心里着急得很，不知道这次有没有希望啊~