ChaseDream

标题: 小丹尼作文练习贴，欢迎各位拍砖～～ [打印本页]

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-14 20:27
标题: 小丹尼作文练习贴，欢迎各位拍砖～～
2012.06.14 独立Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Compared withhiring famous teachers, school should pay more attention to improve facilities.

With development of economical, the government has paid more attention oneducation. Recently, the government in my city grants large amount of money tolocal schools, most of these school use the money to improve their facilities,such as teaching buildings, yields, and so on. It is obvious that schools considerthat they should pay more attention to improve facilities in order to improvethe quality of teaching. But in my opinion, I think that schools will benefitmore to use the money to hiring famous teachers than that of spending money onbuilding facilities.
Admittedly, Better facilities could provide a good condition forstudents to learn. How can students be happy to stay and learn in the school,if their classrooms are too small to hold many students? How can students focuson the lessons if the classrooms are too hot in summer and too cold in winter? Sothat, better facilities is necessary. But it is also a waste of time and moneyif students are not interested in what they are learning, even they stay in aperfect environment.
The most important thing that school can do for students is help theirstudents get interested in learning and grasp proper method to learn. The onlything can help school achieve this goal is nothing but good teachers.
What should schools to do is to hire teachers who are famous of goodteaching skills. These famous teachers can help students become willing tolearn and grasp efficient learning methods. The most famous school in my city,in which all the students can go to better collages every year, has paid moreattention to hire famous teachers to develop the quality of teachers. Thisschool still uses some old facilities, which have been used for two decades.But the quality of students who graduated from this school is always been spokenhighly of. So that, judging one school as a good school can not only depend onthe condition about school’s facilities, but should also depend on the qualityof teachers in this school.
Moreover, famous teachers can help other teachers in this school toimprove their teaching skills by different ways, such as discussing teachingcontent in classes, and giving lectures to other teachers. By doing so,teaching skills of this school’s teachers will eventually get improved.
As a conclusion, hiring famous teachers is more important than improvingfacilities that most school should pay attention. Because the only thing thatstudents need is the person to encourage them be interested to learning andteach them good method to learn.

作者: 单调唱 时间: 2012-6-14 20:40
for students is help theirstudents get interested 低级语法错误就别犯了好不。。。我一眼就看到了。闪人~我还么开始准备T呢~~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-14 23:14
嗯，嗯~收到~谢啦~下次发之前，我会更仔细检查一下哒~明天还有，有空再来挑毛病哦~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-14 23:15

作者: zombiee 时间: 2012-6-14 23:31

2012.06.14 独立Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Compared withhiring famous teachers, school should pay more attention to improve facilities.

With development of economical, the government has paid more attention oneducation. Recently, the government in my city grants large amount of money tolocal schools, most of these school use the money to improve their facilities,such as teaching buildings, yields, and so on. It is obvious that schools considerthat they should pay more attention to improve facilities in order to improvethe quality of teaching. But in my opinion, I think that schools will benefitmore to use the money to hiring famous teachers than that of spending money onbuilding facilities.
Admittedly, Better facilities could provide a good condition forstudents to learn. How can students be happy to stay and learn in the school,if their classrooms are too small to hold many students? How can students focuson the lessons if the classrooms are too hot in summer and too cold in winter? Sothat, better facilities is necessary. But it is also a waste of time and moneyif students are not interested in what they are learning, even they stay in aperfect environment.
The most important thing that school can do for students is help theirstudents get interested in learning and grasp proper method to learn. The onlything can help school achieve this goal is nothing but good teachers.
What should schools to do is to hire teachers who are famous of goodteaching skills. These famous teachers can help students become willing tolearn and grasp efficient learning methods. The most famous school in my city,in which all the students can go to better collages every year, has paid moreattention to hire famous teachers to develop the quality of teachers. Thisschool still uses some old facilities, which have been used for two decades.But the quality of students who graduated from this school is always been spokenhighly of. So that, judging one school as a good school can not only depend onthe condition about school’s facilities, but should also depend on the qualityof teachers in this school.
Moreover, famous teachers can help other teachers in this school toimprove their teaching skills by different ways, such as discussing teachingcontent in classes, and giving lectures to other teachers. By doing so,teaching skills of this school’s teachers will eventually get improved.
As a conclusion, hiring famous teachers is more important than improvingfacilities that most school should pay attention. Because the only thing thatstudents need is the person to encourage them be interested to learning andteach them good method to learn.

-- by 会员 DanielleZ (2012/6/14 20:27:01)

With development of economical, the government has paid more attention oneducation. Recently,建议后面时态用完成时 the government in my city grants large amount of money tolocal schools, most of these school use the money to improve their facilities,such as teaching buildings, yields, and so on. It is obvious that schools considerthat they should pay more attention to improve facilities in order to improvethe quality of teaching. But in my opinion, I think that schools will benefitmore to use the money to hiring famous teachers than that of 不平行spending money onbuilding facilities.
Admittedly, Better facilities could provide a good condition forstudents to learn. How can students be happy to stay and learn in the school,if their classrooms are too small to hold many students? How can students focuson the lessons if the classrooms are too hot in summer and too cold in winter? So~~that,~~ better facilities is necessary. But it is also a waste of time and moneyif students are not interested in what they are learning, even+though they stay in aperfect environment.
The most important thing that school can do for students is help theirstudents get interested in learning and grasp proper method to learn. The onlything can help school achieve this goal is nothing but good teachers.
What should schools to do is to hire teachers who are famous of goodteaching skills. These famous teachers can help students become willing tolearn and grasp efficient learning methods. The most famous school in my city,in which all the students can go to better collages every year, 插入语加分~has paid moreattention to hire famous teachers to develop the quality of teachers. Thisschool still uses some old facilities, which have been used for two decades.But the quality of students who graduated from this school is always been spokenhighly of. So that, judging one school as a good school建议用whether clause can not only depend onthe condition about school’s facilities, but should also depend on the qualityof teachers in this school.
Moreover, famous teachers can help other teachers in this school toimprove their teaching skills by different ways, such as discussing teachingcontent in classes, and giving lectures to other teachers. By doing so,teaching skills of this school’s teachers will eventually get improved.
As a conclusion, hiring famous teachers is more important than improvingfacilities that most school should pay attention. Because the only thing thatstudents need is the person to encourage them be interested to learning andteach them good method to learn.
red:incorrect; blue:suggestion, yellow: good words

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-15 00:11

-- by 会员 DanielleZ (2012/6/14 20:27:01)

-- by 会员 zombiee (2012/6/14 23:31:10)

收到，谢谢啦~

作者: yangyangyu 时间: 2012-6-15 01:44
啊哈，睡前看一看. 小丹尼，我们都是选的"famous teachers"呢，可以来brainstorm一下，找更多的论点支撑哦！^^ 先m一下啦.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-15 09:37

啊哈，睡前看一看. 小丹尼，我们都是选的"famous teachers"呢，可以来brainstorm一下，找更多的论点支撑哦！^^ 先m一下啦.

-- by 会员 yangyangyu (2012/6/15 1:44:58)

哈哈~我觉得famous teachers比较好些捏~但是我论点也是只想到了这几个了捏~
有时间我们来Brainstorm一下啊~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-16 21:53
6.16，独立~
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies andtelevision have more negative effects than positive effects on the way youngpeople behave.
With summer holiday of schools going to start in several days, manymovies and television programs, which produced for students, have become availablein cinemas and televisions. At the same time, watching movies and televisionsis the most important activity for students during their spare time. However,some people, especially some parents of young people, think that watchingmovies and television have negative effect on their children. So that, manyparents forbid their children to watch movies and television. But in my pointof view, it is not necessary for parents to confine their children to watchmovies and television, because movies and television have more positive effectson the way young people behave.

Admittedly, some contents consisted by movies and television are notappropriate for young people to watch, such as violence fighting, horriblestories, and misleading commercials, because these contents sometimes willmislead young people, who are too young to judge right or wrong all bythemselves, to develop some bad behaves, such as drinking, smoking, and evendrug using. So that, the inappropriate television programs and movies will havenegative effects on the way of young people behave.

However, nowadays, governments in different countries have already donesome actions to guarantee young people watch suitable movies and television,which have positive effects on their behaviors. For example, The United States,along with many other countries, has already carried on principles to classifymovies and television shows, defining the movies and television that childrencould watch along without parents’ guidance. With these principles, many youngpeople will be able to watch movies and television that affect them positively.

The most important reason, supporting the statement that movies andtelevision have positive effect on young people’s behaviors, is movies andtelevision could teach young people things that can not learn from teachers orparents. Take my younger brother as an example. He likes travelling very much,and he dreams to travel around the world, but he has no time to travel now,because he has to finish his study in high school. But my brother has foundanother way to travel around world, it is watching Discover Channel, of whichmainly content is travelling. My brother learned many things from DiscoveryChannel. So suitable movies and television programs will help young peoplelearn more, as the result, young people will be positively affected by moviesand television.
To sum up, suitable movies and television programs will benefit youngpeople because young people will learn much useful information from it.

作者: kchszy061ban 时间: 2012-6-17 16:18

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

With summer holiday of schools（建议去掉）going to start in several days, many movies and television programs, which are ()produced for students, have become available in cinemas and televisions. At the same time, watching movies and televisions is the most important activity for students during their spare time. However,some people, especially some parents of young people, think that watching movies and television have negative effect on their children. So that（建议去掉）, many parents forbid their children to watch movies and television. But in (from)my point of view, it is not necessary for parents to confine their children to watch movies and television, because movies and television have more positive effects on the way young people behave.

Admittedly, some contents consisted by movies and television are not appropriate for young people to watch, such as violence fighting, horrible stories, and misleading commercials, because these contents sometimes will mislead young people, who are too young to judge right or wrong all bythemselves, to develop some bad behaves, such as drinking, smoking, and even drug using. So that（建议去掉）, the（建议去掉）inappropriate television programs and movies will have negative effects on the way of young people behave.

However, nowadays, governments in different countries have already done some actions to guarantee young people watch suitable movies and television,which have positive effects on their behaviors. For example, The United States,along with many other countries, has already carried on principles to classify movies and television shows, defining the movies and television that children could watch along without parents’ guidance. With these principles, many young people will be able to watch movies and television that affect them positively.

The most important reason, supporting the statement that movies and television have positive effect on young people’s behaviors, is movies and television could teach young people things that can not learn from teachers or parents. Take my younger brother as an example. He likes travelling very much,and he dreams to travel around the world, but he has no time to travel now,because he has to finish his study in high school. But my brother has found another way to travel around the world, it is watching Discover Channel, of which mainly content is travelling. My brother learned many things from Discovery Channel. So suitable movies and television programs will help young people learn more, as the result, young people will be positively affected by (these) movies and television.

To sum up, suitable movies and television programs will benefit young people because young people will learn much useful information from it(them).

总的来说写的不错，不过就是有一些把握的不太好。然后呢，句式看着有点重复感，建议danie看几篇范文的句式然后应用到这里额。

作者: kchszy061ban 时间: 2012-6-17 22:15
danie 其实多分析几遍别人的文章，再形成自己的风格，我现在就特纠结怎么写。多谢danie的仔细修改。

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-18 18:38
6.18
Do you agreeor disagree with the following statement? It is better to relax by a movie orreading a book than doing physical exercise.

When it comesto the question of different ways for people to relax, people often hold differentopinions. Some people prefer staying at home watching a movie or reading abook, but some other people would like to go out of their houses to do somephysical exercises. And people who prefer staying at home consider that a movieor reading a book would give people better relax than doing physical exercise.However, I do not agree with these people’ ideas.

Admittedly, watchingmovie or reading a book with a cup of coffee would be very fantastic for mostof people to calm down and relax. After a whole day’s hard working or studying,people can refresh their mind and escape from matters which they worry about forseveral hours via a movie or a book. My parents and many of my friends wouldlike to read a book before they go to sleep, since reading could help themrelax and have a great rest, then prepare them for new study or work moreefficiently. A movie and reading a book could help people relax from lettingthem calm their mind.

However, Mostof people will choose to watch movies or reading books at home, which meansthat most of time they will be along at home and will reduce interaction withpeople around themselves. Eventually, without getting together with theirfriends, they will be isolated and their personality will be negatively influenced,perhaps they will be more upset about their failures or mistakes on work orstudy, be more sensitive about unfair treatments from outside, or even becomevery shine to talk with strangers. Sometimes, staying along at home for a longtime can be more damage to people, rather than help them relax.

Thirdly, Physicalexercise can help people relax both physically and mentally. Most peopleworking in one position, such as sitting, or standing. Physical exercise couldhelp them move stiff body after one day’s hard working. Moreover, some lessonsabout physical exercise are now available in many gyms, such as dancing classand yoga class; people can join these classes to do some physical exercise torelax. Group activities can make people’s life better. They can make more newfriends who have equal interest in physical exercise, and they can talk withthem and exchange opinions about physical exercise. They can relax from talkingwith new friends.

To sum up,physical exercise will do better to help people to relax than a movie orreading a book, because it can help people enlarge their social network and gettheir body moved.

作者: Aaaaaaangela 时间: 2012-6-19 08:29
When it
comesto the question of different ways for people to relax, people often hold differentopinions. Some people prefer staying at home to watching a movie(movies) or reading abook(books)感觉题目中是指you他说是单数，但是对于people来说，感觉直接用复数,but（and）感觉不需要用but来转折 some other people would like to go out of their houses to do somephysical exercises. And people who prefer staying at home （to） considering that a movieor reading a book wouldgive people better relax than doing physical exercise(感觉这句和前面两句有重复，我自己觉得好像没什么必要性).However, I do not agree with these people’ ideas.

Admittedly, watching movies or reading (a) books with a cup ofcoffee would be very fantastic for most (of去掉) people to calm down and relax. Aftera whole day’s hard working or studying, people can refresh their mind andescape from matters which they worry about for several hours via a movie or abook(前面是they后面是单数，搭配起来怪怪的）. My parents and many of my friends would like to read a book before theygo to sleep, since reading could help them relax and have a great rest, thenprepare them for new study or work more efficiently.（help them to study or work more efficiently） A movie and reading a bookcould help people relax from letting them calm their mind.

However, Most of people will choose to watch movies orreading books at home, which means that most of time they will be along at homeand will reduce interaction with people around themselves. Eventually, withoutgetting together with their friends, they will be isolated and theirpersonality will be negatively influenced, perhaps they will be more upsetabout their failures or mistakes on work or study, be more sensitive aboutunfair treatments from outside, or even become very shine to talk with strangers.Sometimes, staying along at home for a longtime can be more damage to people,rather than help them relax.

Thirdly, Physical exercise can help people relax bothphysically and mentally. Most people working in one position(这个和后面那个意思不是很统一啊), such as sitting,or standing. Physical exercise could help them move stiff body after one day’shard working. Moreover, some lessons about physical exercise are now availablein many gyms, such as dancing class and yoga class; people can join theseclasses to do some physical exercise torelax. Group activities can makepeople’s life better. They can make more new friends who have equal interest inphysical exercise, and they can talk with them and exchange opinions aboutphysical exercise. They can relax from talking with new friends.

To sum up, physical exercise will do better to help people torelax than a movie or reading a book, because it can help people enlarge theirsocial network and get their body moved.我觉得亲你的作文，观点论述的不是很明确啊，第二段你说了，reading books 和 movies的好处，第三段又说了physical exercise的好处，但是没有致命前者的不好，个人的感觉最好说一下，不然，感觉会观点模糊。开头段还可以再充实一点~加油啊~~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-19 15:53

When it
comesto the question of different ways for people to relax, people often hold differentopinions. Some people prefer staying at home to watching a movie(movies) or reading abook(books)感觉题目中是指you他说是单数，但是对于people来说，感觉直接用复数,but（and）感觉不需要用but来转折 some other people would like to go out of their houses to do somephysical exercises. And people who prefer staying at home （to） considering that a movieor reading a book wouldgive people better relax than doing physical exercise(感觉这句和前面两句有重复，我自己觉得好像没什么必要性).However, I do not agree with these people’ ideas.

Admittedly, watching movies or reading (a) books with a cup ofcoffee would be very fantastic for most (of去掉) people to calm down and relax. Aftera whole day’s hard working or studying, people can refresh their mind andescape from matters which they worry about for several hours via a movie or abook(前面是they后面是单数，搭配起来怪怪的）. My parents and many of my friends would like to read a book before theygo to sleep, since reading could help them relax and have a great rest, thenprepare them for new study or work more efficiently.（help them to study or work more efficiently） A movie and reading a bookcould help people relax from letting them calm their mind.

However, Most of people will choose to watch movies orreading books at home, which means that most of time they will be along at homeand will reduce interaction with people around themselves. Eventually, withoutgetting together with their friends, they will be isolated and theirpersonality will be negatively influenced, perhaps they will be more upsetabout their failures or mistakes on work or study, be more sensitive aboutunfair treatments from outside, or even become very shine to talk with strangers.Sometimes, staying along at home for a longtime can be more damage to people,rather than help them relax.

Thirdly, Physical exercise can help people relax bothphysically and mentally. Most people working in one position(这个和后面那个意思不是很统一啊), such as sitting,or standing. Physical exercise could help them move stiff body after one day’shard working. Moreover, some lessons about physical exercise are now availablein many gyms, such as dancing class and yoga class; people can join theseclasses to do some physical exercise torelax. Group activities can makepeople’s life better. They can make more new friends who have equal interest inphysical exercise, and they can talk with them and exchange opinions aboutphysical exercise. They can relax from talking with new friends.

To sum up, physical exercise will do better to help people torelax than a movie or reading a book, because it can help people enlarge theirsocial network and get their body moved.我觉得亲你的作文，观点论述的不是很明确啊，第二段你说了，reading books 和 movies的好处，第三段又说了physical exercise的好处，但是没有致命前者的不好，个人的感觉最好说一下，不然，感觉会观点模糊。开头段还可以再充实一点~加油啊~~

-- by 会员 Aaaaaaangela (2012/6/19 8:29:48)

是滴~再看下我的这篇文章，我也觉得有这样的问题。这种让步讨论的问题，以后写时要注意一下啊，谢谢啦~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-20 18:06
6.20
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Patience isusually not a good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.（感觉这篇好难写啊~~）

There is no denying that the world is developing in very high speed. Nowadayspeople become busier than people who lived 100 years ago. The reasons why ourlife become so fast is that the technology help people move faster, get moreinformation, and even prepare food easier. So that, some people think thatpatience is usually not a good strategy. We should take action immediate inthis rushing world, because waiting patiently is a waste of time. But from my viewpoint, fast as our life is, we still need patience to contemplate before weaction, since from careful planning and preparation, we can fulfill our goalmore easily.

Initially, a considerable plan can shorten time for people to strive onthe way to reach the target. It is universally known that considerable plansgenerally come from patient contemplate. Take solving problem on mathematic asan example, before we start to calculate the results, a patient comprehensionof the question is of much importance. If we rush to calculate before wetotally understand the question, we will have an incorrect result in most oftime. It needs patience when we solve problem related to everyday life andworking as well.

Moreover, during the process of things evolving, patience is also necessary.Because it takes time that actions could work. If we are too anxious to takeseveral actions at the same time, results sometimes could be even worse. Whenwe got bad cold, most pills will assist us feel better later after takingpills. But some people would like to increase the speed of full recovery; theywill take pills once and once again. As the result, too many pills will causeother illnesses rather than curing the cold. Waiting patiently to see theresult of the previous action is really essential for most of us when deal withall kinds of problem.

Admittedly, no account can we ignore the importance of taking action. Ifsomeone only waits patiently without action, no possible can s/he be success.
Taking action is the only way can we realize considerable plan. Forinstance, someone, who wants to go abroad study, have all study plans beenpatient developed without take first step to study, can not go abroadeventually.

To sum up, immediate action is undoubted important, but patient is morevital because only patient planning and waiting can lead us correct directionto the goal.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-21 19:35
6.21 写得我纠结啊~看看其他人的文章啊~hiahia~
One of your classmates needs help with some schoolwork. Which solutionwould you recommend your classmate should do: to ask you for help or to find aprofessional tutor for help?

Have you ever face some problems about schoolwork? When facing a problem,where do you prefer to get help, from your classmate, or a profession tutor? Differentpeople hold different opinion about these questions. Some people prefer gethelp from classmates, because from discussion both of them will benefit. In myopinion, if one of my classmates need help with some schoolwork, I would liketo suggest my classmates find a professional tutor to help with some schoolwork.

At the very begin, guidance from professional tutors would help myclassmate solve the problem more efficiently. As an expert in a certain field,a tutor has already encountered millions of issues in this field. So that, whenfacing the same problem, a student may spend one hour to figuring out theanswer, however, the tutor will probably get the answer at the first glance atthis question. By getting help from a professional tutor, my classmates cansave numerous of time to revolve problems.

More importantly, finding a professional tutor can help my classmatescorrect some inappropriate learning methods which will obstruct improving theirperformance even they work very hard. Take my cousin as an example. Hisperformance used to be not so good comparing with other students in his class, evenhe is a very clever and hard working student. His mother hired a very famoustutor for him, and this tutor will accompany my cousin finish his homework, teachsome useful tips and proper methods to solve problems everyday. Thanks to theproper learning method from this tutor, my cousin’s grades have alreadyimproved a lot. So that from my cousin’s experience, I believe that aprofession tutor will also benefit to my classmates.

Admittedly, offering assistance to my classmates would definitelybenefit my classmates and me as well. By discussing problems with my classmates,I can review and grasp the relevant knowledge better, which could also improvemy grades. Moreover, it can help us develop interpersonal and communicationskills from discussion, which are quite important to my future.

To sum up, I would like recommend my classmates get help fromprofessional tutors, because it can help my classmates study more efficientlyand correct some learning method.

To sum up, I would like recommend my classmates get help fromprofessional tutors, because it can help my classmates study more efficientlyand correct some learning method.

作者: zombiee 时间: 2012-6-21 23:05

6.20
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Patience isusually not a good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.（感觉这篇好难写啊~~）

There is no denying that the world is developing in very high speed. Nowadayspeople become busier than people who lived 100 years ago. The reasons why ourlife become so fast is that the technology help people move faster, get moreinformation, and even prepare food easier. So that, some people think thatpatience is usually not a good strategy. We should take action immediate inthis rushing world, because waiting patiently is a waste of time. But from my viewpoint, fast as our life is, we still need patience to contemplate before weaction, since from careful planning and preparation, we can fulfill our goalmore easily.

Initially, a considerable plan can shorten time for people to strive onthe way to reach the target. It is universally known that considerable plansgenerally come from patient contemplate. Take solving problem on mathematic asan example, before we start to calculate the results, a patient comprehensionof the question is of much importance. If we rush to calculate before wetotally understand the question, we will have an incorrect result in most oftime. It needs patience when we solve problem related to everyday life andworking as well.

Moreover, during the process of things ~~evolving~~, patience is also necessary.Because it takes time that actions could work. If we are too anxious to takeseveral actions at the same time, results sometimes could be even worse. Whenwe got bad cold, most pills will assist us feel better later after takingpills有点反复说，重复. But some people would like to increase the speed of full recovery; theywill take pills once and once again. As the result, too many pills will causeother illnesses rather than curing the cold. Waiting patiently to see theresult of the previous action is really essential for most of us when deal withall kinds of problem.

Admittedly, no account can we ignore the importance of taking action. Ifsomeone only waits patiently without action, ~~no possible~~ never can s/he be success.
Taking action is the only way can we realize considerable plan. Forinstance, someone, who wants to go abroad study, have all study plans beenpatient developed without take first step to study, +and can not go abroadeventually.

To sum up, immediate action is undoubtedly important, but patient名词 is morevital because only patient planning and waiting can lead us in the correct direction toward the goal.

-- by 会员 DanielleZ (2012/6/20 18:06:46)

有进步，结构条理清楚，错误较少，正反两面分析，不足是缺深入，详述。
进步很大，加油~~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-22 00:01

-- by 会员 DanielleZ (2012/6/20 18:06:46)

有进步，结构条理清楚，错误较少，正反两面分析，不足是缺深入，详述。
进步很大，加油~~

-- by 会员 zombiee (2012/6/21 23:05:13)

谢谢僵尸先生鼓励呢，我会继续努力，向你们学习的~话说你的作文写了木有啊？

作者: 包子不包子 时间: 2012-6-22 06:30
Have you ever faced some problems about schoolwork? When facing a problem,where do you prefer to get help, from your classmate, or a profession tutor? Differentpeople hold different opinion about these questions. Some people prefer gethelp from classmates, because from discussion both of them will benefit. In myopinion, if one of my classmates need help with some schoolwork, I would liketo suggest my classmates find a professional tutor to help with some schoolwork.

At the very begin, guidance from professional tutors would help myclassmate solve the problem more efficiently. As an expert in a certain field,a tutor has already encountered millions of issues ~~in this field~~. So that, whenfacing the same problem, a student may spend one hour to figuring out theanswer, however, the tutor will probably get the answer at the first glance atthis question. By getting help from a professional tutor, my classmates cansave numerous of time to revolve problems.

More importantly, finding a professional tutor can help my classmatescorrect some inappropriate learning methods which will obstruct improving theirperformance even they work very hard. Take my cousin as an example. Hisperformance used to be not so good comparing with other students in his class, evenhe is a very clever and hard working student. His mother hired a very famoustutor for him, and this tutor will accompany my cousin finish his homework, teachsome useful tips and proper methods to solve problems everyday. Thanks to theproper learning method from this tutor, my cousin’s grades have alreadyimproved a lot. So that from my cousin’s experience, I believe that aprofession tutor will also benefit to my classmates.

Admittedly, offering assistance to my classmates would definitelybenefit my classmates and me as well. By discussing problems with my classmates,I can review and grasp the relevant knowledge better, which could also improvemy grades. Moreover, it can help us develop interpersonal and communicationskills from discussion, which are quite important to my future. 感觉还少一部分但是...所以问tutor更好

To sum up, I would like recommend my classmates get help fromprofessional tutors, because it can help my classmates study more efficientlyand correct some learning method.

很好了啊包子没的说了

逻辑很清晰的

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-23 01:05
6.22
If you need to discuss upsetting or controversial problems with others,you will use e-mail or text messaging, or use the telephone or voice-messaging.
It isuniversally acknowledge that upsetting or controversial problems can not be avoidedin our life. When you need to discuss these problems with your friend,classmates, or colleagues, by which way do you prefer, e-mails and text messageor the telephone or voice-messaging? Most people probably will choose telephonesor voice-messaging, since people in the other side of telephone could understandwhat you saying instantly, especially telephones could enable both of youexchange opinions more efficiently. However, from my standpoint, I do notconsider telephone and voice-messaging can be better than e-mail and textmessaging when discussing upsetting or controversial problems.
At thevery beginning, one disadvantage of discussing through telephone orvoice-messaging is that people sometimes can not understand each other verywell through phones, thus discussion through the telephone or voice-messagingwill leave much to be desired. For instance, if a Chinese, whose English isvery poor, discusses with an American through telephone, the results will turnto be very frustrated. There is no doubt that they can not understand eachother, and not mention to discuss some upsetting or controversial problems.However, by using e-mails and text messages the situation can be better, theycan use some tools, such as dictionary, reference books, and internet websites,to help them translate the content of e-mails. By doing so, discussion can besmoothly and efficiently.
Inaddition, e-mails and text messages will enable people to have discussionrecorded and help them recall all details whenever they need, especially forsome essential discussions of controversial problems. Take my boss an example;she has been working for more than ten years. She told me that getting into thehabit of discussing through e-mails is very crucial for our career life, sincepeople sometimes are too busy to remember every detail about discussion of controversialproblems. It is conceivable that e-mails and text messages can help peoplerecall those details. So, e-mails and text messages are needed for discussion ofcontroversial problems.
Admittedly,there is no denying that using telephones and voice-messages can reflect sender’semotion more clearly and vividly. From their intonation, people can gain moreinformation than reading an e-mail. But, most of time the above information isuseless for people to discuss upsetting or controversial problems.

To sumup, I prefer using e-mails and text messages than using telephones and voice messages;because it can help people understand each other better and have discussionrecorded.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-23 17:26
6.23 Happy Dragon Boat Festival

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are noweasier to become educated than in the past.

When it comes to the question whether education now becomes easier for people to access, people usually hold different opinions. With the society developing, the tuition of universities become more than that of severaldecades ago. So that, some people consider that it becomes harder for people to become educated because of the tuition increasing. However, from my standpoint,some other factors make education more accessible for many people, even the tuition becomes higher, such as websites and variety kinds of classes.

First and the foremost, governments in many cities have spare no effortto develop the condition of education. They have already granted a large amountof money to guarantee all children who are old enough to go to primary school;they build more schools, hire more teachers and publish more policies to makesure all children’s rights to get educated. In China, attending primary school is statutoryand free; it means that the people, who forbid children to achieve primaryeducation, will get punished by local government. And children do not need topay any tuition for primary school. Since this policy has been carried on in China
, manyyoung children have benefited from it. Thanks to the effort of the government,it becomes easier for young children to become educated, especially forchildren whose families are very poor.

Besides the effort from governments, variety kinds of classes andlectures nowadays enable people to get educated about whatever they want mucheasier than before, such as Fresh, Wine tasting, Ballet, and the forth, whichare not available in the last two decades. Take wine tasting class as anexample, many people in Chinaare very interested in wine tasting, but due to lack of sufficient educationabout wine, most people could not enjoy the fantastic about tasting good winesin the past. However, the situation has changed significantly in the past fiveyears, many wine tasting classes become available to people, they offeredopportunities for people to get educated more conveniently than that in thepast.

Most importantly, the development of technology has great positive influenceon simplifying methods that people utilize to teach themselves. Millions ofresources on the internet have helped people to achieve self teaching materialsmuch easier than the past. For instance, by based on the internet, distanceeducation has been developed so rapidly. Students who can not afford to studyaboard are now able to attend classes in the other country by distanceeducation, thanks to the development of the online distance education, studentswho are eager to learn knowledge but can not afford go aboard can teachthemselves much easier than the past.

To sum up, educationbecomes easier for people to access, because of contributions from thegovernment’s effort, variety classes and the development of the technology.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-23 17:31
yeah~第三页了~嘿嘿~

作者: kchszy061ban 时间: 2012-6-23 17:48

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

It is universally acknowledged that upsetting or controversial problems can not be avoided in our life. When you need to discuss these problems with your friends,classmates, or colleagues, by which way do you prefer, e-mails and text message or the telephone or voice-messaging? Most people probably will choose telephones or voice-messaging, since people in the other side of telephone could understand what you (are) saying instantly, especially telephones could enable both of you exchange opinions more efficiently. However, from my standpoint, I do not consider telephone and voice-messaging can be better than e-mail and text messaging when discussing upsetting or controversial problems.

At the very beginning, one disadvantage of discussing through telephone or voice-messaging is that people sometimes can not understand each other very well through phones, thus discussion through the telephone or voice-messaging will leave much to be desired. For instance, if a Chinese, whose English is very poor, discusses with an American through telephone, the results will turn to be very frustrated. There is no doubt that they can not understand each other, and not mention to discuss some upsetting or controversial problems.However, by using e-mails and text messages the situation can be better, they can use some tools, such as dictionary, reference books, and internet websites,to help them translate the content of e-mails （这个看着不是很明白额，翻译电子邮件的内容？+so that both of them can understand each other）. By doing so, discussion can be smoothly and efficiently.

In addition, e-mails and text messages will enable people to have discussion recorded and help them recall all details whenever they need, especially for some essential discussions of controversial problems. Take my boss for an example;she has been working for more than ten years. She told me that getting into the habit of discussing through e-mails is very crucial for our career life, since people sometimes are too busy to remember every detail about discussion of controversial problems. It is conceivable that e-mails and text messages can help people recall those details. So, e-mails and text messages are needed for discussion of controversial problems. (其实这个电话和微信也有额，嘿嘿，只不过，文字的便于查阅和整理。个人观点了)

Admittedly,there is no denying that using telephones and voice-messages can reflect sender’s emotion more clearly and vividly. From their intonation, people can gain more information than reading an e-mail. But, most of time the above information is useless for people to discuss upsetting or controversial problems.

To sumup, I prefer using e-mails and text messages than using telephones and voice messages;because it can help people understand each other better and have discussion recorded.

Danie的句子使用越来越熟练了，嘿嘿。是不是我们现在都是限时写了额？

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-23 22:38

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

Danie的句子使用越来越熟练了，嘿嘿。是不是我们现在都是限时写了额？

-- by 会员 kchszy061ban (2012/6/23 17:48:57)

还没有哎，我现在35个好句子还没背熟练呢，每次写的时候还要对着看一下。基本上只能40分钟完成，然后还要检查一下。。。嘿嘿~banban，你一般是计时写的吧？

作者: zombiee 时间: 2012-6-24 20:40

6.23 Happy Dragon Boat Festival

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are noweasier to become educated than in the past.

When it comes to the question whether education now becomes easier for people to access, people usually hold different opinions. With the society developing, the tuition of universities become more than that of severaldecades ago. So that, some people consider that it becomes harder for people to become educated because of the tuition increasing. However, from my standpoint,some other factors make education more accessible for many people, even the tuition becomes higher, such as websites and variety kinds of classes.

First and the foremost, governments in many cities have spare no effortto develop the condition of education. They have already granted a large amountof money to guarantee all children who are old enough to go to primary school;they build more schools, hire more teachers and publish more policies to makesure all children’s rights to get educated. In China, attending primary school is statutoryand free; it means that the people, who forbid children to achieve primaryeducation, will get punished by local government（law）. And children do not need topay any tuition for primary school. Since this policy has been carried on out in China
, many~~young~~ children have benefited from it. Thanks to the effort of the government,it becomes easier for young children to become educated, especially forchildren whose families are very poor.

Besides the effort from governments, variety kinds of classes andlectures nowadays enable people to get educated about whatever they want mucheasier than before, such as Fresh, Wine tasting, Ballet, and the forth, whichare not available in the last two decades. Take wine tasting class as anexample, many people in Chinaare very interested in wine tasting, but due to lack of sufficient educationabout wine, most people could not enjoy the fantastic about tasting good winesin the past. However, the situation has changed significantly in the past fiveyears, 如何改变了，不明白many wine tasting classes become available to people, they offeredopportunities for people to get educated more conveniently than that in thepast.

Most importantly, the development of technology has great positive influenceon simplifying methods that people utilize to teach themselves. Millions ofresources on the internet have helped people to achieve self teaching materialsmuch easier than the past. For instance, by based on the internet, distanceeducation has been developed so rapidly. Students who can not afford to studyaboard are now able to attend classes in the other country by distanceeducation, thanks to the development of the online distance education, studentswho are eager to learn knowledge but can not afford go aboard can teachthemselves much easier than the past.

To sum up, educationbecomes easier for people to access, because of contributions from thegovernment’s effort, variety classes and the development of the technology.

-- by 会员 DanielleZ (2012/6/23 17:26:24)

举例有点生涩，没有说明白说透，有点空. 还有我怎么感觉有点似曾相识，哈哈。
加油

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-25 23:26
6月24日110108 ML Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Food inthe past was much healthier than today.

It is universally acknowledged that the quality of people’s life becomesignificantly improved since the technology has been developing rapidly. Improvementof technology enable people travel faster, work more efficiently, and even havemore options for food. When it comes to the question whether foods nowadaysreally become healthier than that of the past, people usually hold differentopinions, some people believe the food become healthier because technology hasrefined the process of producing food and helped people get more nutrition fromeating. However, some people claim that because of the development oftechnology, more pollution has been involved in environment. There becomes moreair, soli, and water pollution. Thus, as the results, vegetable, fruits, andanimals, which supply people’s daily life inevitably, receive more pollution,which make food become more damage to our health. From my standpoint, I agreewith the statement that the nowadays food become less healthy than that in thepast.

At the very beginning, with science and technology improved noticeably, moreand more chemical substances have been utilized into growing vegetable, fruit,and feeding animals. Some of these substances helped vegetables, fruits andanimals grow faster and better, at the same time, most of these substances areharmful people’s health with long-period eating. Take one substance as anexample, this material helps to increase cattle’s growing speed. It acceleratesthe growing periods of cattle as much as ten months, which means cattle willgrow more quickly and could been sold more quickly. There is no denying thatthis substance help farmers and merchants get more profit, but many researcheshave indicated that this substance would destroy people’s immune system if theyget into the habit of eating the meat, which comes from the cattle fed by thissubstance. This phenomena is not rare in our nowadays life, the abuse of thechemistry substances pose a great threat to health of food.

Further more, the way of cooking food has also become less healthy thanthe past. In order to catch up the hurry speed of our life, people have numerousways to speed up the time we spend on eating. More and more fast food and semi-preparefood become popular among people. Thanks to these easy prepare food, more timehave been saved to other crucial matters. However, fast food and semi-preparefood would probably lead to high percentage of oil and salt, such as freshfries, and burgers. These foods will cause many diseases, such as obesity, highblood pressure, and eve heart attack.

Admittedly, one advantage of the development of technology is that thequantity of foods become less limited, which means people can easily get enoughnutrition from foods, especially in some harsh weather. Processed food wouldnot be the only choice for people in winter; they can purchase fresh vegetableand fruits from market which are grown in the greenhouse. How greatcontribution of the technology it is to improve the health of food today.
Tosum up, even more and more technology make food readily and fast to prepare,the development of the technology leads more damage of people’s health becauseof the abuse of chemical fertilizer and more oil and salt in food.

作者: qianjun06 时间: 2012-6-26 08:20
6月24日110108 ML Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Food inthe past was much healthier than today.
批改蓝色好句子
It is universally acknowledged that the quality of people’s life becomesignificantly improved since the technology has been developing rapidly. Improvementof technology enable people travel faster, work more efficiently, and even havemore options for food. When it comes to the question whether foods nowadaysreally become healthier than that of the past, people usually hold differentopinions, some people believe the food become healthier because technology hasrefined the process of producing food and helped people get more nutrition fromeating. However, some people ~~claim~~argue that because of the development oftechnology, more pollution has been ~~involved~~ dispersedinto environment. There becomes moreair, soli, and water pollution. (Thus, as the results)重复意思,vegetable, fruits, andanimals, which supply people’s daily life inevitably, receive more pollution,~~which make~~makeing food become more damage to our health. From my standpoint, I agreewith the statement that the nowadays food become less healthyhealthier than that in thepast.

At the very beginning, with science and technology improved noticeably, moreand more chemical substances have been utilized into growing vegetable, fruit,and feeding animals. Some of these substances helped vegetables, fruits andanimals grow faster and better, at the same time, most of these substances areharmful to people’s health with long-period eating. Take one substance as anexample, this material helps to increase cattle’s growing speed. It acceleratesthe growing periods of cattle as much lessas ten months, which means cattle willgrow more quickly and could been sold more quickly. There is no denying thatthis substance helps farmers and merchants get more profit, but many researcheshave indicated that this substance would destroy people’s immune system if theyget into the habit of eating the meat, which comes from the cattle fed by thissubstance. This phenomena is not rare in our nowadays life, the abuse of thechemistry substances pose a great threat to health of food. 戴云的吧，呵呵

Further more, the way of cooking food has also become less healthy than thatin the past. In order to catch up with the hurry speed of our life, people have numerousways to speed up the time we spend on eating. More and more fast food and semi-preparefood become popular among people. Thanks to these easy prepare food, more timehave been saved to other crucial matters. However, fast food and semi-preparefood would probably lead to high percentage of oil and salt, such as freshfriesfrenchfries, and burgers. These foods will cause many diseases, such as obesity, highblood pressure, and eve heart attack. 缺少例子

Admittedly, one advantage of the development of technology is that （thequantity of foods become less limited）没明白意思感觉是贬义, which means people can easily get enoughnutrition from foods, especially in some harsh weather. Processed food wouldnot be the only choice for people in winter; they can purchase fresh vegetableand fruits from market which are grown in the greenhouse. How greatthe contribution of the technology it is to improve the health of food today.

Tosum up, even more and more technologyies make food readily and fast to prepare,the development of the technologyies leads more damage of people’s health becauseof the abuse of chemical fertilizer ~~and~~ more oil and salt in food.

1，文章单复数错误太多了，写作不注意。
2，单词的变化太少
3. 插入语用的还是蛮多，蛮不错

作者: Raina 时间: 2012-6-27 16:41
标题: 袋子类型介绍
无纺布袋是一种非织造布，它直接利用高聚物切片、短纤维或长丝通过各种纤网成形方法和固结技术形成的具有柔软、透气和平面结构的新型纤维制品。
优点:无纺布袋http://www.shwufangbudai.com/201261414444.html价廉物美，环保实用，应用广泛，有突出的广告位置。适用于各类业务活动及展览展销会，是企事业单位理想的广告促销礼品赠品. 下面介绍袋子的另外几款类型。
1、广告型广告袋
　　购物袋广告可以利用袋身有限的面积，向世人传播企业或产品服务的市场信息。当顾客提着印有商店广告的购物袋，穿行于大街小巷的时候，实际上是一些精美的广告袋，并不亚于制作一个优秀的广告招牌，而费用却相对较低。
2、知识型广告袋
　　它是把各类具有一定知识性的图案、文字，如世界名画、中国书法等，印在购物袋上。这类购物袋，不仅给消费者在携带物品时提供了方便，而且陶冶了人们的情操，使人产生美妙的心理感受。
3、礼品型广告袋
　　我国是一个礼仪之邦，逢年过节、祝寿贺喜，人们总是要带上礼品“走动、走动”，以联络感情，烘托气氛。当客人把礼品装在印有“祝您长寿”、“愿君快乐”等字样的购物袋里提去时，主人感到的不仅是礼物，而且另有一番情趣在心头。
4、纪念型广告袋
　　如××艺术节纪念、旅游纪念袋等。这种策略迎合人们的纪念心理和荣誉心理，使人们在购物之后，尚有一番新感受。
5、简易型广告袋
　　当顾客购买杂七杂八的东西，需要简易购物袋盛装时，如果店家能够提供一个，解人之忧，必定受到消费者欢迎。给人方便，本身就是促销的一个重要决窍。
6、趋时型广告袋
　　现在人们普遍追求高水准的生活方式，时尚的商品领导一时的消费潮流。当社会上出现什么“热”的时候，若店家把商品图案、宣传信息印在优美的购物袋上，无疑是促销的重要一招。当消费者看到热点商品某店有售时，也就产生了“挡不住的诱惑”。
7、仿古型广告袋
　　许多社会知名度高的传统商品，由于用料讲究、制作老道、历史久远而倍受消费者喜爱。如果购物袋上印有古朴而典雅的图案和文字，给人一种高贵和庄重的感觉，想必也会引起部分消费者的购物情趣。

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-29 21:45
6月26日100206 NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Highschool students should take a course on basic economics.

Have you ever attended basic economics courses inthe high school? Have you ever had trouble to deal with a large amount of money?Recently, a public topic over the phenomenon of high school providing a course onbasic economics has been brought into our eyes. When it comes to the questionwhether it is necessary to teach high school students some economicalknowledge, people usually hold diverse opinions. Some people think thatstudents have too much subjects to learn, adding a course about basic economicswill do nothing but increase their working load. However, the others believethat it is essential for high school students to grasp some economicalknowledge, which will benefit their future life. From my standpoint, I aminclined to the statement that high school students should take a course onbasic economics, because economics is not only assist them learn the method ofmanagement of money, but also cultivate their interest of economics.
At the very begin, an advantage of learning somebasic economics is that it can benefit students and their family. Takingcourses enable students gain more knowledge about how to manage money, whichare lacked by a huge number of families, such as the deposit rate, stocks andso the forth. It is conceivable that students will deliver that economicalknowledge towards their parents, as the result, their parents will inevitablylearn the knowledge as well. Consequently, these families who are armed with adequateeconomical knowledge will do some investments base on that knowledge. Take myown experience as an example, I have learned some knowledge about deposit ratein university, during my holiday, I taught my parents what I had learned inuniversity. Thanks to this useful knowledge, my families get more interestbecause of choosing a compound interest of deposit. My case is not rare, a lotof students in my class have already helped their families to do somemanagement of money by the knowledge they learn in class. So it is obvious thatbasic economics knowledge could help both students and their families.
Atthe same time, along with the benefits of my families from economicalknowledge, economical lessons also have a favorable impact of students’ futurelife. There is increasing tendency that more and more young people get into thehabit of purchasing something of which the price is too high to them to afford,just because the good looks fashionable and popular. This impulse buying isclosely related to the lack of economics knowledge. After learning the basic knowledgeof economics, students can be more rationale when they want to buy something.Furthermore, they may even try some investments to increase their incomes. Manyresearches have indicated that the more economical knowledge students can gainin high school, the more skillful of them to management their prosperities. Whatan extremely important role that economical knowledge play in students life.
Admittedly, despite many obvious advantages oflearning basic economical courses in high school, it is not without itsproblem. The majority disadvantage is learning extra courses will increasestudents’ working load. But compared to some interest classes that parentsforce students to attend, the basic and understandable economical course willlead more interest rather than burden.
Fromwhat has been discussed above, we may safely draw a conclusion that studentsshould learn some courses about basic economics, because it would benefit theirfamilies and their future.

作者: kchszy061ban 时间: 2012-6-30 11:24

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

Have you ever attended basic economics courses in the high school? Have you ever had trouble to deal with a large amount of money?Recently, a public topic over the phenomenon of high school providing a course on basic economics has been brought into our eyes. When it comes to the question of whether it is necessary to teach high school students some economical knowledge, people usually hold diverse opinions. Some people think that students have too much subjects to learn, adding a course about basic economics will do nothing but increase their working load. However, the others believe that it is essential for high school students to grasp some economical knowledge, which will benefit their future life. From my stand point, I am inclined to the statement that high school students should take a course on basic economics, because economics is not only assist them learn the method of management of money, but also cultivate their interest of economics.

At the very begin, an advantage of learning some basic economics is that it can benefit students and their family. Taking courses enable students gain more knowledge about how to manage money, which are lacked by a huge number of families, such as the deposit rate, stocks and so the forth. It is conceivable that students will deliver that economical knowledge towards their parents, as the result, their parents will inevitably learn the knowledge as well. Consequently, these families who are armed with adequate economical knowledge will do some investments base on that knowledge. Take my own experience as an example, I have learned some knowledge about deposit rate in university, during my holiday, I taught my parents what I had learned in university. Thanks to this useful knowledge, my families get more interest because of choosing a compound interest of deposit. My case is not rare, a lot of students in my class have already helped their families to do some management of money by the knowledge they learn in class. So it is obvious that basic economics knowledge could help both students and their families.

At the same time, along with the benefits of my families from economical knowledge, economical lessons also have a favorable impact of students’ future life. There is increasing tendency that more and more young people get into the habit of purchasing something of which the price is too high to（for） them to afford,just because the good looks fashionable and popular. This impulse buying is closely related to the lack of economics knowledge. After learning the basic knowledge of economics, students can be more rationale when they want to buy something. Furthermore, they may even try some investments to increase their incomes. Many researches have indicated that the more economical knowledge students can gain in high school, the more skillful of them to management their prosperities. What an extremely important role that economical knowledge play in students life.！

Admittedly, despite many obvious advantages of learning basic economical courses in high school, it is not without its problem. The majority disadvantage is learning extra courses will increase students’ working load. But compared to some interest classes that parents force students to attend, the basic and understandable economical course will lead more interest rather than burden.

From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw a conclusion that students should learn some courses about basic economics, because it would benefit their families and their future.

Denie你的句子背完了额，好多你都用到了，佩服俺们丹尼亲改晚了，原谅下额。一个就是句子的简练度需要提高，嘿嘿。这个包子童鞋的作文里面可是表现的很好。

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-6-30 20:14

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw a conclusion that students should learn some courses about basic economics, because it would benefit their families and their future.

-- by 会员 kchszy061ban (2012/6/30 11:24:55)

好的，偶继续努力捏~不过200句最终背的也不熟~每天还是要多看几次才能记起来啊~嘿嘿~
我会继续努力，向大家学习的~哈哈~加油哦~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-1 23:54
7.1 TPO 16 第一篇综合，好久木有写了~亲们要猛拍哦~我把一些打字的错误已经改了。
Both of the reading material and the lecture discuss about the status of archaeology in the United Kingdom. The reading passage holds the thought that the archaeology in Britain are facing serious problems,while, the professor in the lecture made several points to refute the idea ofthe reading passage by talking about the guidance lines from the United KingdomGovernment, which support the archaeology in Britain develop greatly.
At the very beginning, from professor's opinion,all artifacts were not lost to construction projects. The new rules require allthe sites on which are going to be constructed be exam by archaeologistfirstly, then if the area do not contain any artifacts, it can be used byConstruct Company. At the same time, if some artifacts are contained in thecertain area, the building company, local government, and the archaeologisthave to figure out some methods to protect these artifacts, such as buildinghouses around this area, or having all the artifacts be well documented. Thisis totally different from the reading material's idea that many valuableartifacts were lost to construction projects.
Furthermore, according to the lecture, theprofessor states that the financial support to archaeologists is very adequate.Even the government would pay money to the archaeologists to do someresearches; the construct company will pay for all the money for all the workin the examination. So this is another new source allowing researchers toperform all researches. This is constructed from the reading passage'sstatement.
The last point is that the job opportunitiesoffered to the archaeologists are the more plentiful than any other time periodsin Britain.The increasing stages in the examination develop the working opportunities forarchaeologists, such as examination the area, draw plan for well manners, andthe building process. So that the more jobs are opened, the more professors ofarchaeologists will get jobs. This is another part where professors disagreewith the reading material.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-2 20:33
7月1日Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement? Rather than help theirchildren do schoolwork, parents should encourage their children do workindependently. Do you agree or disagree?
好久没写了，生疏了不少。猛拍啊，亲~

Have you ever had problems when doinghomework when you are very young? Who would you like to ask for help from,parents, classmates, or yourself? Have your parents ever refused to offerassistance to you when you asked help from them? When it comes to the questionwhether parents should help their children do schoolwork or encourage them dowork independently, people usually hold different opinions. Some people believethat assistance from parents would improve efficiency of children to finishwork; however, some people think that relying on parents’ assistance too muchwill reduce the chance for children to develop independent solving problemsskills. From my standpoint point, I believe that parents should not offer toomuch help when their children are doing schoolwork.
At the very beginning, doing schoolworkindependently has a good influence on children understanding the relevantknowledge learned in the school, which means that the everyday assignments areclosely related to the knowledge on the class, children can review the contentof class, solve some confusions about classes by doing assignment alone. Withoutparents immediate help, children have to figure out the solution when they facesome problems. Let us take myself experience as an example, when I was inprimary school; math is the last subject I want to learn. I got into the habitof asking my mother to get solution, when I was doing homework of math. Even I couldfinish my homework very quickly; I was not able to remember relevant knowledgein it. It is very bother to my mother that I would ask the same question againand again. At last, my mother refused to help me when I doing schoolwork, I compelledto do homework all by myself. As the result, I can finally solve the mathproblem independently eventually.
At the same time, doing schoolworkalone will enable children make it a rule to conquer the problems with theirown efforts. By doing so, they can naturally develop the personalities of persistenceand independent. Many researches have indicated that the children, who havereceived less assistance from their parents, would be more independently and persistencewhen facing some obstacles in their career. Consequently, these children would havemore opportunities to be success.
Admittedly, sometimes parents’ help areessential to those children, who are too young to totally understand thecorrect meaning of schoolwork. With error comprehension of the schoolwork,children will probably go into a wrong direction. So in this circumstance, socrucial is the assistance that it can avoid children waste too much time. Butonce their children are able to understand the total meaning of the homework,parents should not provide help any longer.
To summary, doing schoolworkindependently is of great importance for children because it can help children understandthe relevant knowledge and develop personalities of independence andpersistence which are good for their future.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-2 23:40
7.2 TPO 17
The reading material and the professor discuss about the reasons why the numberof United States
birds declines. The professor in the lecture considers the reasons in thearticle are not convincing, and she makes several points to refute the idea ofthe reading passage.First, the expansions of the urban areas providebetter and larger habitats for birds. The professor argues that maybe thenumber of some birds has declined, while others have increased significantly.Even there are some complains from people living in urban areas about too manybirds, such as seagulls, hocks and the like. This is different from the idearaised in the reading material that the human populations and settlements willlead to birds’ disappearance.
Furthermore, the increasing of agriculture wouldnot lead to increasing usage of the wilderness areas. In the lecture, theprofessor raised the issue that the continuous introducing of the moreproductive crops will enable people have more food per unit land, as a result, nomore wilderness areas are needed. The current agricultural areas are able toprovide enough food to supply the growing human population. This was anotherpart where experience contradicted theory.
Finally, according to the professor, people havealready known the bad influence of the pesticides to birds. Two solutions havealready been used to prevent pesticides from killing birds. The first solutionis that people have invented some pesticides, which are used to killagricultural and home garden pests, with less toxic. Moreover, the pest-resistancecrops have been widely cultivated, which means that the crops can resistant pestsby themselves. No more pesticides are needed. This would definitely reduce theharm of pesticides to birds. This is entirely opposed to the reading passage'sstandpoint.

作者: sailingqiong 时间: 2012-7-3 16:48
Have you ever had problems when doinghomework when you are very young? Who would you like to ask for help from,parents, classmates, or yourself? Have your parents ever refused to offerassistance to you when you asked help from them? When it comes to the questionwhether parents should help their children do schoolwork or encourage them dowork independently, people usually hold different opinions. Some people believethat assistance from parents would improve efficiency of children to finishwork; however, some people think that relying on parents’ assistance too muchwill reduce the chance for children to develop independent solving problemsskills. From my standpoint point, I believe that parents should not offer toomuch help when their children are doing schoolwork.(很不错的一个凑字数的方法学习了 background + 正反面论点 +my point)
At the very beginning, doing schoolworkindependently has a good influence on children understanding the relevantknowledge learned in the school（这句话的结构是 infulence on sb doing sth ?真的有这个结构么。。。感觉怪怪的建议换成 inflence on sb's understanding of the relevant knowlegde obtained in school ）, which means that the everyday's assignments are closely related to the knowledge on the class, children can review the contentof class, solve some confusions about classes by doing assignment alone.(出现太多class啦可以换成lessons, schooltime之类的吧) Withoutparents（所有格亲） immediate help, children have to figure out the solution when they facesome problems. Let us take myself experience as an example, when I was inprimary school; math is the last subject I want （过去式）to learn. I got into the habitof asking my mother to get solution, when I was doing homework of math. Even I couldfinish my homework very quickly; I was not able to remember relevant knowledgein it. It is very bother to my mother that I would ask the same question againand again. At last, my mother refused to help me when I doing schoolwork, I compelledto do homework all by myself. As the result, I can finally solve the mathproblem independently eventually.
At the same time, doing schoolworkalone will enable children make it a rule to conquer the problems with theirown efforts. By doing so, they can naturally develop the personalities of persistenceand independent. Many researches have indicated that the children, who havereceived less assistance from their parents, would be more independently and persistencewhen facing some obstacles in their career. Consequently, these children would havemore opportunities to be success.
Admittedly, sometimes parents’ help are（is）essential to those children, who are too young to totally understand thecorrect meaning of schoolwork. With error comprehension of the schoolwork,children will probably go into a wrong direction. So in this circumstance, so crucial is the assistance（assistance is so crucial） that it can avoid children waste too much time. Butonce their children are able to understand the total meaning of the homework,parents should not provide help any longer.
To summary, doing schoolworkindependently is of great importance for children because it can help children understandthe relevant knowledge and develop personalities of independence andpersistence which are good for their future.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-3 20:00
7月3日Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies and television havemore negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave.

Recently,the increasing number of movies and television programs become available as thesummer holiday coming. Watching movies or televisions is the most importantentertainment for many youngsters. When it comes to question that whether themovies and television have positive or negative effects towards children, peoplehold diverse opinions. Some people, especially some parents, believe that the moviesand television programs has bad influence on their children, because thecontent of the movies or television programs sometimes contain inappropriatestory for children to watch, such as violent fighting, smoking, and drug using.However, others believe that movies and television have positive impact onyoung people, because they can learn many things that they can not achieve inthe class. From my standpoint, I am cling to that movies and television is goodfor young people.

Admittedly,television programs or movies may contain some inappropriate content, whichwill mislead children, who lack of sufficient self control, develop some badbehaviors, such as drinking, smoking and even drug using. It is inevitable thatchildren will imitate the actors’ behave when they watching some movies andtelevision programs. Without enough outside guidance from their parents,teachers, or some other relatives, they can not judge the bad or good. As aresult, they will develop bad behaviors; even they will do some crimes. So itis reasonable that many parents consider some television and movies will lead theirchildren cultivate some bad behaviors.

Atthe same time, many directors and actors have already been aware of the negativeinfluence to children, they are now correcting some bad behaviors both in moviesor their daily life, in order to set good patterns to young people. Take afamous action star, Jacky Chen as an example. Most of his movies contain somefighting shots, children will learn to use violent to solve problems from them.In order to tell children the stories in the movies are counterfeits, he alwaysadds some shots of making movies to uncover the process of how the fightingmake. Additional, he also devotes into the charity, which will encourage hisfans to concentrate on helping others, such poor children and the lonely older.It is conceivable that young people who like watching movies and televisionprograms of these positive actors, they will eventually learn from them and getinto the habitats of doing good things.

Furthermore,television and movies can also assist youngster learn many things that they cannot achieve from text books. My brother, he likes travel very much, however,because of the heavy burden of study, he compelled to focus his most energy onstudying and give up many travel plans. But thanks to many television programsabout tourism, he can reveal and embrace the beauty of nature, such as mountains,rivers, valleys and other landscapes around the world. His favorite TV programis Discovery Channel, and he has learned much useful knowledge about travelfrom it. From his experiences, we can learn what a crucial role played of moviesand television to help young people develop good behaviors.
Fromwhat we have discussed above, we can safely draw conclusion that movies andtelevision have more positive effect on the way of young people’s behave. Becausemany actors have already set good patterns for young people, and young peoplewill learn some useful knowledge that can not get from schools from someappropriate TV programs and movies.

作者: 瓜瓜不瓜 时间: 2012-7-3 21:28
Geg7.2 TPO 17

红色为错误高亮为精彩蓝色为建议绿色是内容上的不足紫色为总评

The reading material and the professor discuss about the reasons why the numberof United States
birds declines. The professor in the lecture considers the reasons in thearticle are not convincing, and she makes several points to refute the idea of the reading passage.

First, the expansions of the urban areas provide better and larger habitats for birds（这里最好写明这个是professor的观点）. The professor argues that maybe the number of some birds has declined, while others have increased significantly.Even there are some complains from people living in urban areas about too manybirds, such as seagulls, hocks （hawks）and the like(??应该是pigeon吧）. This is different from the idea raised in the reading material that the human populations and settlements willlead to birds’ disappearance.

Furthermore, the increasing of agriculture would not lead to increasing usage of the wilderness areas（这里最好写明这个是professor的观点）. . In the lecture, theprofessor raised the issue that the continuous introducing of the moreproductive crops will enable people have more food per unit land, as a result, nomore wilderness areas are needed. The current agricultural areas are able toprovide enough food to supply the growing human population. This was anotherpart where experience contradicted theory.（漏了一个小点，technology最好提到一下）
Finally, according to the professor, people have already known the bad influence of the pesticides to birds. Two solutions havealready been used to prevent pesticides from killing birds. The first solutionis that people have invented some pesticides, which are used to killa gricultural and home garden pests, with less toxic. Moreover, the pest-resistance crops have been widely cultivated, which means that the crops can resistant pestsby themselves. No more pesticides are needed. This would definitely reduce theharm of pesticides to birds. This is entirely opposed to the reading passage'sstandpoint.

最后最好加一个总结段，增加文章的完整性。

总评：文章结构完整，要点也比较全了。但是第二段和第三段的开头没有像第四段那样点出第一句话是教授的观点，建议像第四段一样点明。
连接词用的很好。要是有一个结尾就更好啦！

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-3 21:40

Geg7.2 TPO 17

红色为错误高亮为精彩蓝色为建议绿色是内容上的不足紫色为总评

The reading material and the professor discuss about the reasons why the numberof United States
birds declines. The professor in the lecture considers the reasons in thearticle are not convincing, and she makes several points to refute the idea of the reading passage.

First, the expansions of the urban areas provide better and larger habitats for birds（这里最好写明这个是professor的观点）. The professor argues that maybe the number of some birds has declined, while others have increased significantly.Even there are some complains from people living in urban areas about too manybirds, such as seagulls, hocks （hawks）and the like(??应该是pigeon吧）. This is different from the idea raised in the reading material that the human populations and settlements willlead to birds’ disappearance.

Furthermore, the increasing of agriculture would not lead to increasing usage of the wilderness areas（这里最好写明这个是professor的观点）. . In the lecture, theprofessor raised the issue that the continuous introducing of the moreproductive crops will enable people have more food per unit land, as a result, nomore wilderness areas are needed. The current agricultural areas are able toprovide enough food to supply the growing human population. This was anotherpart where experience contradicted theory.（漏了一个小点，technology最好提到一下）
Finally, according to the professor, people have already known the bad influence of the pesticides to birds. Two solutions havealready been used to prevent pesticides from killing birds. The first solutionis that people have invented some pesticides, which are used to killa gricultural and home garden pests, with less toxic. Moreover, the pest-resistance crops have been widely cultivated, which means that the crops can resistant pestsby themselves. No more pesticides are needed. This would definitely reduce theharm of pesticides to birds. This is entirely opposed to the reading passage'sstandpoint.

最后最好加一个总结段，增加文章的完整性。

总评：文章结构完整，要点也比较全了。但是第二段和第三段的开头没有像第四段那样点出第一句话是教授的观点，建议像第四段一样点明。
连接词用的很好。要是有一个结尾就更好啦！

-- by 会员瓜瓜不瓜 (2012/7/3 21:28:04)

收到瓜瓜~谢谢啦~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-3 22:53
7.3 TPO 18
Thereading passage and the professor discuss about ways to prevent Torreya fromdying out. The reading passage asserts three ways to stop Torreya's extinction,while the professor in the lecture thinks that all of these three methods arenot satisfied. And she made several points to refute the idea of the readingpassage.
Firstof all, the professor argues that reestablishing Torreya in the same locationwhere it used to live in can not stop Torreya extincting successfully. Thanksto the specific microclimate, Torreya would be able to thrive in its old habitats.But the professor argues that the microclimates in those areas are no longerwithin the reach, so that Torreya may not survive in those areas. The reasonwhy the microclimate change is that the globe warming, or drying of the wetlandhas changed this specific microclimate. This is where the speaker disagreeswith the writer.
Moreover,according to the professor moving Torreya to an entirely different location cannot be a good solution. The professor illustrate the limitation of thissolution by giving an example of another types of tree, named Black Locustree, which is also moved to anotherplaces. This kind of trees grows so quickly in its new habitats that it haskilled many of its competitors, among them, many trees are also going to dieout. From this case, moving to another location can not be good solutionbecause the outcome to the environment is not sure. This was another part whereexperience contradicted theory.
Finally,the professor raise the issue that preserve Torreya in research centers is nota good solution, because it can not the trees living in the research centerscan not resist to diseases. The population of the Torreya in the lab is toosmall to defend the illness. So it is not good for Torraye to be preserved inthe lab for long term. This is entirely oppose to the professor’s standpoint.

作者: 包子不包子 时间: 2012-7-4 07:38
7.1

Have you ever had problems in~~when~~ doinghomework when you are very young? Who would you like to ask for help from,parents, classmates, or yourself? Have your parents ever refused to offerassistance to you when you asked help from them? When it comes to the questionwhether parents should help their children do schoolwork or encourage them dowork independently, people usually hold different opinions. Some people believethat assistance from parents would improve efficiency of children to finishwork; however, some people think that relying on parents’ assistance too muchwill reduce the chance for children to develop independent solving problemsskills. From my standpoint point, I believe that parents should not offer toomuch help when their children are doing schoolwork.
At the very beginning, doing schoolworkindependently has a good influence on children understanding the relevantknowledge learned in the school, which means that the everyday assignments areclosely related to the knowledge on the class, children can review the contentof class, solve some confusions about classes by doing assignment alone. Withoutparents immediate help, children have to figure out the solution when they facesome problems. Let us take myself experience as an example, when I was inprimary school; math is the last subject I want to learn. I got into the habitof asking my mother to get solution, when I was doing homework of math. Even I couldfinish my homework very quickly; I was not able to remember relevant knowledgein it. ~~It is very bother to~~ it bothers my mother a lot thatmy mother that I would ask the same question againand again. At last, my mother refused to help me when I doing schoolwork, I compelledto do homework all by myself. As the result, I can finally solve the mathproblem independently eventually.
At the same time, doing schoolworkalone will enable children make it a rule to conquer the problems with theirown efforts. By doing so, they can naturally develop the personalities of persistenceand independent. Many researches have indicated that the children, who havereceived less assistance from their parents, would be more independently and persistencewhen facing some obstacles in their career. Consequently, these children would havemore opportunities to be success.
Admittedly, sometimes parents’ help areessential to those children, who are too young to totally understand thecorrect meaning of schoolwork. With error comprehension of the schoolwork,children will probably go into a wrong direction. So in this circumstance, socrucial is the assistance that it can avoid children waste too much time. Butonce their children are able to understand the total meaning of the homework,parents should not provide help any longer.
To summary, doing schoolworkindependently is of great importance for children because it can help children understandthe relevant knowledge and develop personalities of independence andpersistence which are good for their future.

没什么大问题啦举得自己的例子叙述有些长了显得第二个例子不那么充分
句型多样些吧

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-4 10:38

7.1

Have you ever had problems in~~when~~ doinghomework when you are very young? Who would you like to ask for help from,parents, classmates, or yourself? Have your parents ever refused to offerassistance to you when you asked help from them? When it comes to the questionwhether parents should help their children do schoolwork or encourage them dowork independently, people usually hold different opinions. Some people believethat assistance from parents would improve efficiency of children to finishwork; however, some people think that relying on parents’ assistance too muchwill reduce the chance for children to develop independent solving problemsskills. From my standpoint point, I believe that parents should not offer toomuch help when their children are doing schoolwork.
At the very beginning, doing schoolworkindependently has a good influence on children understanding the relevantknowledge learned in the school, which means that the everyday assignments areclosely related to the knowledge on the class, children can review the contentof class, solve some confusions about classes by doing assignment alone. Withoutparents immediate help, children have to figure out the solution when they facesome problems. Let us take myself experience as an example, when I was inprimary school; math is the last subject I want to learn. I got into the habitof asking my mother to get solution, when I was doing homework of math. Even I couldfinish my homework very quickly; I was not able to remember relevant knowledgein it. ~~It is very bother to~~ it bothers my mother a lot thatmy mother that I would ask the same question againand again. At last, my mother refused to help me when I doing schoolwork, I compelledto do homework all by myself. As the result, I can finally solve the mathproblem independently eventually.
At the same time, doing schoolworkalone will enable children make it a rule to conquer the problems with theirown efforts. By doing so, they can naturally develop the personalities of persistenceand independent. Many researches have indicated that the children, who havereceived less assistance from their parents, would be more independently and persistencewhen facing some obstacles in their career. Consequently, these children would havemore opportunities to be success.
Admittedly, sometimes parents’ help areessential to those children, who are too young to totally understand thecorrect meaning of schoolwork. With error comprehension of the schoolwork,children will probably go into a wrong direction. So in this circumstance, socrucial is the assistance that it can avoid children waste too much time. Butonce their children are able to understand the total meaning of the homework,parents should not provide help any longer.
To summary, doing schoolworkindependently is of great importance for children because it can help children understandthe relevant knowledge and develop personalities of independence andpersistence which are good for their future.

没什么大问题啦举得自己的例子叙述有些长了显得第二个例子不那么充分
句型多样些吧

-- by 会员包子不包子 (2012/7/4 7:38:04)

收到，谢谢包子啦，背诵200句还在继续~希望过几天句式能够多样化一些啊~

作者: kchszy061ban 时间: 2012-7-4 11:42

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

Recently, the increasing number of movies and television programs become available as the summer holiday coming. Watching movies or televisions is the most importantent ertainment for many youngsters. When it comes to question that whether themovies and television have positive or negative effects towards children, people hold diverse opinions. Some people, especially some parents, believe that the movies and television programs hasve bad influences on their children, because the content of the（把这个去掉丹尼亲，和后面的重复了额my dear） movies or television programs sometimes contain inappropriate storyies for children to watch, such as violent fighting, smoking, and drug using. However, others believe that movies and television have positive impact on young people, because they can learn many things that they can not achieve in the class. From my standpoint, I am cling to that movies and television is good for young people.

Admittedly,television programs or movies may contain some inappropriate content, which will mislead children, who lack of sufficient self control, develop some bad behaviors, such as drinking, smoking and even drug using. It is inevitable thatchildren will imitate the actors’ behave（这个是动词额） when they watching some movies and television programs. Without enough outside guidance from their parents,teachers, or some other relatives, they can not judge the bad or good. As aresult, they will develop bad behaviors; even they will do some crimes. So it is reasonable that many parents consider some television and movies will lead their children cultivate some bad behaviors.

At the same time, many directors and actors have already been aware of the negative influence（of movies and television） to children, they are now correcting some bad behaviors both in movies or their daily life （丹尼这个咱们的想象有点扩大呗？）, in order（换一下词so as） to set good patterns to young people. Take a famous action star, Jacky Chen as an example. Most of his movies contain somefighting shots, children will learn to use violent to solve problems from them. In order to tell children the stories in the movies are counterfeits, he always adds some shots of making movies to uncover the process of how the fighting make. Additionally, he also devotes into the charity, which will encourage his fans to concentrate on helping others, such as poor children and the lonely olders. It is conceivable that young people who like watching movies and television programs of these positive actors, they（把这个去掉，怎么感觉都不是很顺的说了） will eventually learn from them and get into the habitats of doing good things.

Furthermore,television and movies can also assist youngster learn many things that they cannot achieve from text books. My brother, he likes travel （traveling）very much, however,because of the heavy burden of study, he compelled to focus his most energy on studying and give up many travel plans. But thanks to many television programs about tourism, he can reveal and embrace the beauty of nature, such as mountains,rivers, valleys and other landscapes around the world. His favorite TV programis is Discovery Channel, and he has learned much useful knowledge about travel from it. From his experiences, we can learn what a crucial role played of movies and television to help young people develop good behaviors.

From what we have discussed above, we can safely draw conclusion that movies and television have more positive effects on the way of young people’s behave. Because many actors have already set good patterns for young people, and young people will learn some useful knowledge that can not get from schools from some appropriate TV programs and movies.

丹尼亲，咱们的小错误都有些相似。我在看高分120的写作。推荐你看下。

作者: sailingqiong 时间: 2012-7-4 17:51
来改你的7.3综合了整体来说第三个原因阐述不太清楚确实有难度我听得时候也没有听完整再就是时态有些混乱
7.3 TPO 18
Thereading（这是啥词？） passage and the professor discuss（建议用过去式） about ways to prevent Torreya fromdying out. The reading passage asserts three ways to stop Torreya's extinction,while the professor in the lecture thinks that all of these three methods arenot satisfied. And she made （这里用了过去式前面是现在进行时很诡异）several points to refute the idea of the readingpassage.
Firstof all, the professor argues that reestablishing Torreya in the same locationwhere it used to live in can not stop Torreya from extincting successfully. Thanksto the specific microclimate, Torreya would be able to thrive in its old habitats.But the professor argues that the microclimates in those areas are no longerwithin the reach, so that Torreya may not survive in those areas. The reasonwhy （reason和why其实是重复的最近在看GMAT 所以对wordy很敏感中国人觉得没问题但是美国人会觉得wordy）the microclimate change is that the globe warming, or drying of the wetlandhas changed this specific microclimate. This is where the speaker disagreeswith the writer.
Moreover,according to the professor moving Torreya to an entirely different location cannot be a good solution. The professor illustrate the limitation of thissolution by giving an example of another types of tree, named Black Locustree, which is also moved (去掉is)to anotherplaces. This kind of trees grows so quickly in its new habitats that it haskilled many of its competitors, among them, many trees are also going to dieout. From this case, moving to another location can not be good solutionbecause the outcome to the environment is not sure. This was another part whereexperience contradicted theory.
Finally,the professor raise the issue that preserve Torreya in research centers is nota good solution, because it can not the trees living in the research centerscan not resist to diseases. The population of the Torreya in the lab is toosmall to defend the illness. So it is not good for Torraye to be preserved inthe lab for long term. This is entirely oppose to the professor’s standpoint. 听力中的原因是the population of Torreya trees that can be kept in the centers will probably not be able to resist diseases建议强调出种群这个词 population.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-4 19:59

来改你的7.3综合了整体来说第三个原因阐述不太清楚确实有难度我听得时候也没有听完整再就是时态有些混乱
7.3 TPO 18
Thereading（这是啥词？） passage and the professor discuss（建议用过去式） about ways to prevent Torreya fromdying out. The reading passage asserts three ways to stop Torreya's extinction,while the professor in the lecture thinks that all of these three methods arenot satisfied. And she made （这里用了过去式前面是现在进行时很诡异）several points to refute the idea of the readingpassage.
Firstof all, the professor argues that reestablishing Torreya in the same locationwhere it used to live in can not stop Torreya from extincting successfully. Thanksto the specific microclimate, Torreya would be able to thrive in its old habitats.But the professor argues that the microclimates in those areas are no longerwithin the reach, so that Torreya may not survive in those areas. The reasonwhy （reason和why其实是重复的最近在看GMAT 所以对wordy很敏感中国人觉得没问题但是美国人会觉得wordy）the microclimate change is that the globe warming, or drying of the wetlandhas changed this specific microclimate. This is where the speaker disagreeswith the writer.
Moreover,according to the professor moving Torreya to an entirely different location cannot be a good solution. The professor illustrate the limitation of thissolution by giving an example of another types of tree, named Black Locustree, which is also moved (去掉is)to anotherplaces. This kind of trees grows so quickly in its new habitats that it haskilled many of its competitors, among them, many trees are also going to dieout. From this case, moving to another location can not be good solutionbecause the outcome to the environment is not sure. This was another part whereexperience contradicted theory.
Finally,the professor raise the issue that preserve Torreya in research centers is nota good solution, because it can not the trees living in the research centerscan not resist to diseases. The population of the Torreya in the lab is toosmall to defend the illness. So it is not good for Torraye to be preserved inthe lab for long term. This is entirely oppose to the professor’s standpoint. 听力中的原因是the population of Torreya trees that can be kept in the centers will probably not be able to resist diseases建议强调出种群这个词 population.

-- by 会员 sailingqiong (2012/7/4 17:51:53)

确实，时态写的时候有点纠结呢~谢谢啦~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-4 22:42
7.4 TPO19 综合

The article and listeningmaterial discussed the impact of the buzzing-a new static of advertisement, the reading passage asserted three disadvantages of the buzzing, while the studentin the lecture, whose part-time job was buzzer, thought that these three pointswere misleading, and he made several points to refute the idea in the readingpassage.

First ofall, the student argued that the buzzer do not always tell lies, even they gotpayment from the company. The reading passage said that since buzzers got moneyfrom the company, most of buzzers might not be able to tell the truth about theproducts. However, from this student’s experience, when he buzzed to someone,he expressed the real feeling about this product. Because the products werevery good, there was no need for buzzers to lie about the quality of theproducts. This is where the speaker disagrees with the writer.

Moreover, accordingto the students, the buyer would ask so many questions about the product whenthey wanted to purchase one product. This is different from the point in thereading passage that people would be less critical. The student argued thatwhen he buzzed with someone about the telephone, people tended to ask manyquestions about the phone, such as the price, how long can it be used. This wasanother part where experienced contradicted theory.

Finally,the student raised the issue that buzzers would not be harmful to the socialrelationship. The article presented that people will become less trustful ofpeople once they realize that people they met socially may be buzzers with ahidden agenda. Thespeaker claims that companies would recruit buzzers to promote their products,unless the qualities of produces were very good. People who bought goods frombuzzers’ recommendations would feel satisfy about products. As a result, theywould have an enjoyable experience. Thus, they will be more trustful to otherpeople. This was entirely opposed to the professor’s standpoint.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-5 19:59
7.5综合 TPO 20

Thereading passage and the lecture discussed about the impact of the "let itburn" policy. The article asserted that "let it burn" policycaused a large scale of damage on both environment and economy. However, theprofessor in the lecture believed that the fire is nature part of theenvironment, because the fire is creative and good to environment. She madeseveral points about the situation after fire to refute the idea of the readingpassage.

First ofall, the professor claimed that vegetation in the Yellow Stone national parkreceived beneficial from the fire. Plants became more diversified because thefire enhanced the growing opportunities for those small plants. The professorexplained that the air tree used to cover all space that small plants could notreceive enough space. But after fire, the space was opened to small plants, sothat they would be able to grow better. This is where differ from the readingpassage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the plants would die out unless they exposure tohigh level of heat. But most of plants did not suffer the high level heat, sothat they would appear again and have better opportunism to grow. Thiscircumstance provided ideal habitats for small animals. After small animalsappeared, their predator would appear as well. The food chain would become farstronger than the past. This was another part where experience contradictedtheory.

Finally,the professor raised issues that the fire would not have bad influence on thelocal economy. The reason is that the fire would not happen every year. Thefire in 1988 was caused by massive reasons, such as low rain fall, strongforest wind. After 1988, there was not such huge fire happened again. Thus, theoccasional fire would not affect the local tourism and the local economy. Thisis entirely opposed to the article.

作者: sailingqiong 时间: 2012-7-5 22:11
74的综合我还没做。。。给你改75吧嘻嘻 Thereading passage and the lecture discussed about the impact of the "let itburn" policy. The article asserted （i like this word）that "let it burn" policycaused a large scale of damage on both environment and economy. However, theprofessor in the lecture believed that the fire is nature part of theenvironment, because the fire is creative and good to environment. She madeseveral points about the situation after fire to refute the idea of the readingpassage.

First ofall, the professor claimed that vegetation in the Yellow Stone national parkreceived beneficial from the firej建议写一下reading passage的看法吧然后再说listening是反对的 . Plants became more diversified because thefire enhanced the growing opportunities for those small plants. The professorexplained that the air tree used to cover all space that small plants could notreceive enough space. But after fire, the space was opened to small plants, sothat they would be able to grow better. This is where differ from the readingpassage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the plants would die out unless they exposure tohigh level of heat. But most of plants did not suffer the high level heat, sothat they would appear again and have better opportunism to grow. （这些我认为是defense 文章中关于植物的Point 所以应该放在第一段）Thiscircumstance provided ideal habitats for small animals. After small animalsappeared, their predator would appear as well. The food chain would become farstronger than the past. This was another part where experience contradictedtheory.其实passage里边是分动植物讲的听力里也是所以我是第一段写动物第二段写植物一会看看范文
Finally,the professor raised issues that the fire would not have bad influence on thelocal economy.是对旅游的影响间接影响到经济这点要说出来 The reason is that the fire would not happen every year. Thefire in 1988 was caused by massive reasons, such as low rain fall, strongforest wind. After 1988, there was not such huge fire happened again. Thus, theoccasional fire would not affect the local tourism and the local economy. Thisis entirely opposed to the article.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-5 23:07

74的综合我还没做。。。给你改75吧嘻嘻 Thereading passage and the lecture discussed about the impact of the "let itburn" policy. The article asserted （i like this word）that "let it burn" policycaused a large scale of damage on both environment and economy. However, theprofessor in the lecture believed that the fire is nature part of theenvironment, because the fire is creative and good to environment. She madeseveral points about the situation after fire to refute the idea of the readingpassage.

First ofall, the professor claimed that vegetation in the Yellow Stone national parkreceived beneficial from the firej建议写一下reading passage的看法吧然后再说listening是反对的 . Plants became more diversified because thefire enhanced the growing opportunities for those small plants. The professorexplained that the air tree used to cover all space that small plants could notreceive enough space. But after fire, the space was opened to small plants, sothat they would be able to grow better. This is where differ from the readingpassage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the plants would die out unless they exposure tohigh level of heat. But most of plants did not suffer the high level heat, sothat they would appear again and have better opportunism to grow. （这些我认为是defense 文章中关于植物的Point 所以应该放在第一段）Thiscircumstance provided ideal habitats for small animals. After small animalsappeared, their predator would appear as well. The food chain would become farstronger than the past. This was another part where experience contradictedtheory.其实passage里边是分动植物讲的听力里也是所以我是第一段写动物第二段写植物一会看看范文
Finally,the professor raised issues that the fire would not have bad influence on thelocal economy.是对旅游的影响间接影响到经济这点要说出来 The reason is that the fire would not happen every year. Thefire in 1988 was caused by massive reasons, such as low rain fall, strongforest wind. After 1988, there was not such huge fire happened again. Thus, theoccasional fire would not affect the local tourism and the local economy. Thisis entirely opposed to the article.

-- by 会员 sailingqiong (2012/7/5 22:11:34)

是的，我也是觉得第二点又说植物又说动物有点混乱。但考虑到因为植物生长出来了，然后小动物才有东西吃的~所以就在第二段有说了几句。我去看看范文去~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-6 22:05
7.6 TPO 21
The readingpassage and the professor discussed about the impacts of genetically modifiedtrees. The reading passage asserted that the genetically modified trees promiseto bring a number of economic benefits. While, the professor in the lecturethought the genetically modified trees caused more problems when people take acloser look at them, and she raised several points to refute the idea of thereading material.

First of all,the professor argued that the genetically modified trees are more likely to bedamaged than nature trees. The genetically modified trees which are designed toresist one certain issue, would not be able to survive from other differentproblems, such as pests, however, the nature trees would survive from theseproblems more easily, since the genetic diversity of the nature trees is morecomplex than the genetically modified trees, which contained only one kind ofgenes. Thanks to the diversification of the genes, one kind of the nature treeswould problem be killed by one trouble, but others in the nature trees couldsurvive. But all the genetically modified trees would be killed. This was wherethe speaker disagreed with the reading passage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the farmer who grow the genetically trees can notreceive economic benefits. Because the farmers have to pay more to buy geneticallymodified trees. In additional, they can not collect the seeds of those treesfree, because the government requirement require them can not grow geneticallymodified trees.

The finalevidence the speakers adopted to jeopardize the passage is that geneticallymodified trees bring more damage to other local natures trees. Geneticallymodified trees grow so aggressively that their competitors - the nature trees,would be crowed out, because the genetically modified trees would take moresources to supply its rapid growth, such as soil, nutrition, and sunshine. Thiswas entirely opposed to the article's standpoint.

作者: tyyhappy 时间: 2012-7-7 00:13
那我改4号的吧，正好我今儿做啦^_^
The article and listening material discussed the impact of the buzzing-a new static of advertisement, the reading passage asserted three disadvantages of the buzzing, while the student in the lecture, whose part-time job was buzzer, thought that these three points were misleading, and he made several points to refute the idea in the reading passage. （个人觉得这个句子太长了，可以断句的，这样读起来很累。不过内容很全。）

First of all, the student argued that the buzzer do not always tell lies, even they got payment from the company. The reading passage said that since buzzers got money from the company, most of buzzers might not be able to tell the truth about the products. However, from this student’s experience, when he buzzed to someone, he expressed the real feeling about this product. Because the products were very good, there was no need for buzzers to lie about the quality of the products. This is where the speaker disagrees with the writer.

Moreover, according to the students, the buyer would ask so many questions about the product when they wanted to purchase one product. This is different from the point in the reading passage that people would be less critical. The student argued that when he buzzed with someone about the telephone, people tended to ask many questions about the phone, such as the price, how long can it be used. This was another part where experienced contradicted theory.

Finally, the student raised the issue that buzzers would not be harmful to the social relationship. The article presented that people will become less trustful of people once they realize that people they met socially may be buzzers with a hidden agenda. The speaker claims that companies would recruit buzzers to promote their products, unless the qualities of produces were very good. People who bought goods from buzzers’ recommendations would feel satisfy(satisfied) about products. As a result, they would have an enjoyable experience. Thus, they will be more trustful to other people. This was entirely opposed to the professor’s standpoint.

结构清晰完整。还木有错误。听的很全，很细。

有个小小的问题，一定要听这么全吗，要是只对比大的观点行不呢？

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-7 18:32
7.6 Do you agree with the viewpoint thatpeople are now easier to become educated than in the past?
Have youever thought about what change did the social development bring to people,faster transportation, better medical condition, or more convenient accommodation?When it comes to the question what have the social development provide, peopleusually hold different opinions. There is increasing number of people believethat education is one of the most significant change in people’s live; it hasbeen much easier than the past. However, others people do not agree with theabove statement, because the tuition has become much higher than the past dueto the improvement of the society. The situation would be tougher for thosepoor people who wanted to achieve education. From my standpoint; the educationhas become easier than the past, because many useful resources and policieshave reduced the difficulties of many people to be educated.

At thevery beginning, it is universally acknowledged that the efforts of the localgovernments have already made education easier for all the people to access, InChina, the rights to go to primary schools of the children is statutory, whichmeans that the any one who forbid children to go school will be punished. Moreover,the governments have spared no efforts to reduce the tuition of primaryeducation. The primary school education is now free to all the children. So asthe result, children, especially whose families are very poor, can receiveeducation much easier than in the past.

Furthermore,the development of society has encouraged diverse kinds of classes availablefor people who want to learn some knowledge that can not be offered bytraditional schools. Take my mother as an example, she is a big fan of cooking,but without sufficient classes for her to attend, she was compelled to give upthe desire of learning cooking in the past. However, the situation has changed,thousands and thousands of education classes are provide in my city, amongthem, wine tasting and foreign languages and cooking classes are the mostpopular ones. So that, my mother can easily gets educated about classes about cookingnow. My mother’s case is not rare, many people have benefited from theseclasses.

What ismore important is that the development of the technology. High technology givespeople a new way to be educated. No one can deny that the internet plays anextremely important role in education. Thanks to the help of the internet, thedistance education based on internet let millions of people to get educated easier.Getting into the habits of learning from distance education, people do not needto travel thousands miles to attend class. Many researches have indicated thatthe number of people who receive education from distance education is equal tothe number of people who attend traditional classes. How crucial is internet toease people getting educated.

From whatwe have discussed, we can safely draw conclusion that people now get educatedeasier than in the past, because of the governments’ effort and developments oftechnology.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-7 18:48

那我改4号的吧，正好我今儿做啦^_^
The article and listening material discussed the impact of the buzzing-a new static of advertisement, the reading passage asserted three disadvantages of the buzzing, while the student in the lecture, whose part-time job was buzzer, thought that these three points were misleading, and he made several points to refute the idea in the reading passage. （个人觉得这个句子太长了，可以断句的，这样读起来很累。不过内容很全。）

First of all, the student argued that the buzzer do not always tell lies, even they got payment from the company. The reading passage said that since buzzers got money from the company, most of buzzers might not be able to tell the truth about the products. However, from this student’s experience, when he buzzed to someone, he expressed the real feeling about this product. Because the products were very good, there was no need for buzzers to lie about the quality of the products. This is where the speaker disagrees with the writer.

Moreover, according to the students, the buyer would ask so many questions about the product when they wanted to purchase one product. This is different from the point in the reading passage that people would be less critical. The student argued that when he buzzed with someone about the telephone, people tended to ask many questions about the phone, such as the price, how long can it be used. This was another part where experienced contradicted theory.

Finally, the student raised the issue that buzzers would not be harmful to the social relationship. The article presented that people will become less trustful of people once they realize that people they met socially may be buzzers with a hidden agenda. The speaker claims that companies would recruit buzzers to promote their products, unless the qualities of produces were very good. People who bought goods from buzzers’ recommendations would feel satisfy(satisfied) about products. As a result, they would have an enjoyable experience. Thus, they will be more trustful to other people. This was entirely opposed to the professor’s standpoint.

结构清晰完整。还木有错误。听的很全，很细。

有个小小的问题，一定要听这么全吗，要是只对比大的观点行不呢？

-- by 会员 tyyhappy (2012/7/7 0:13:17)

我看了一下OG，上面也没有说听力需要听细致的。我觉得不一定非要听的很细节啦~
因为我已经听懂了，而且也已经记下来了。时间允许的情况下多写一些更好嘛~对吧~嘿嘿~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-7 22:17
7.7 TPO 22
The reading passage and thelecture discussed about whether the ethanol fuel is a good alternative togasoline. The reading passage held the opinion that ethanol was not a goodreplacement for gasoline based on three main reasons. But the professor in thelecture thought all of these reasons were not convincing, and he raised severalpoints to refute the idea of the reading passage.

First of all, the professorargued that the use of ethanol would not increase the problems lead by globalwarming. Admittedly, burning ethanol would release carbon dioxide into theatmosphere, but growing process of the plants, by which ethanol was mainlymade, will counteract the release of the carbon dioxide. Plants absorb carbondioxide as a kind of nutrition when they were growing. So that, the carbondioxide released to the atmosphere was actually the plants removed fromatmosphere previously. This was where speaker disagreed with the writer.

Moreover, according to theprofessor, the production of ethanol would not reduce the amount of plantsavailable for animals. The professor pointed out that people could utilize theuneatable parts of plants to make ethanol. So that, the amount of plant thatcould feed animals will not be influenced by producing ethanol. This wasanother part where experience contradicted theory.

The final evidence thespeaker adopted to jeopardize the passage was that the price of ethanol woulddrop down after more people begin to use it. The professor explained that whenmore people start to use ethanol fuel, the factories could increase itsproduction. It is common that the more yield of the mass production; the cheaperprice of this production will be. If three times more people in the United Statesstart to use ethanol, the price would drop down 40%. This was entirely opposedto the passage.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-8 00:50
7.7 it is moreimportant to choose friends that 更能 havefun with than to choose friends that will help you when you need them.
不会写这篇文章啊~~
Have you everhad some obstacles that difficult to conquer? When you face some difficultiesand need outside assistance, which one would you turn to, friends, parents, orthrive by yourself? When you ask your friends to get some help, would they be willingto help you? When it comes to question about which is more important friendscan have fun, or friends could give you a hand when you need, people usually holddifferent opinions. Some people believe that we should choose friend which wecan have fun, but others declare that friends that can offer you assistancecould be more valuable. From my standpoint, I asserted that friends who willhelp you when you need them are more essential.

Admittedly, sharinghappiness and interests is the very first step to make friends. We can developfriendship much easier with people who have equal interests with us. Whateverit may be, say, reading, music and so the forth, common interests and topicsshorten distance between people who meet each other for the first time. Additionally,in the process of further communication in the following years of life, one mayfind it a great joy to get along with people of such kind. It is friendshipthat can make our life more vivid and colorful. And whatever the fun may be,whether spiritual or material, without possibility of having fun together, anyso-called friendship will finally disappear like the temporary tides.

At the sametime, our life is not always full of happiness, sorrows, horrent, and someother bad things will also accompany with happiness appearing in our life. Whenwe confront these difficulties, assistance from friends is more crucial for usto get through these problems. Lily is one of the intimate friends of mine, andshe helped me to overcome the hardest period of time in my life. When Igraduate from collage, I was not able to find a job, and had little money formy accommodation. It is lily who gave money to me and shared room to me until Ifound a job. Thanks to her kindly help, I could get through the toughest time. Theworst thing that everyone does not want to meet is that the formally intimate friendssurprisingly disappear when you are in trouble; then you will find itdisgusting that the former intercourses are only because he or she wanted totake advantages or make use of you. So you might get more cautious to makefriends.

From what wehave been discussed above, we can safely draw conclusion that we need friendswho can do favor to us when we need, because our life are always full of bothhappiness and trouble.

作者: 瓜瓜不瓜 时间: 2012-7-8 01:23
7.6 TPO 21 红色为错误蓝色为建议紫色总评
The reading passage and the professor discussed about the impacts of genetically modified trees. The reading passage asserted that the genetically modified trees promise to bring a number of economic benefits.（passage并不是单单讲了economic方面的优势哦，还有环境方面的，所以建议这里要写总的观点，比如改成：bring a lot of benefits both on economy and on ecology） While, the professor ~~in the lecture~~ thought the genetically modified trees caused more(这个more是要和什么对比呢？句子里面没有标明哦) problems when people take acloser look at them, and she raised several points to refute the idea of there ading material.

First of all,the professor argued that the genetically modified trees are more likely to be damaged than nature trees. The genetically modified trees which are designed toresist（没有这个单词额） one certain issue, would not be able to survive from other different problems, such as pests, however, the nature trees would survive from these problems more easily, since the genetic diversity of the nature trees is more complex than the genetically modified trees, which contained only one kind of genes. Thanks to the diversification of the genes, one kind of the nature trees would problem be killed by one trouble, but others in the nature trees couldsurvive. But all the genetically modified trees would be killed. This was wherethe speaker disagreed with the reading passage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the farmer who grow the genetically trees can not receive economic benefits. Because the farmers have to pay more to buy（+the seeds of ） geneticallymodified trees. In additional, they can not collect the seeds of those treesfree, because the government requirement require them can not grow geneticallymodified trees.(这句话在表达上有点问题，不是不能种GM trees，而是每次种都要付钱)

The finalevidence the speakers adopted to jeopardize the passage is that geneticallymodified trees bring more damage to other local natures trees. Genetically modified trees grow so aggressively that their competitors - the nature trees,would be crowed out, because the genetically modified trees would take moresources to supply its rapid growth, such as soil, nutrition, and sunshine. Thiswas entirely opposed to the article's standpoint.

总评：丹尼，建议加个结尾哦。
还有很多单词之间没有空格，不知道是不是复制粘贴出了问题。
整体不错了，加油！独立我明天早上写哈。我写完再给你批

作者: T不死 时间: 2012-7-8 16:14
7.7 独立

灰色我认为不是很地道的地方，绿色是我认为应该修改。黄色为好句子

Have you ever had some obstacles that (are) difficult to conquer? When you face some difficulties and need outside assistance, which one would you turn to, friends, parents, or thrive by yourself? When you ask your friends to get some help, would they be willing to help you? When it comes to question about which is more important friends can have fun, or friends could give you a hand when you need (这句话说得不是很清楚), people usually hold different opinions. Some people believe that we should choose friend which we can have fun, but others declare that friends that can offer you assistance could be more valuable. From my stand point, I asserted that friends who will help you when you need them are more essential.

开头整体不错，把讨论的主题讲清楚了，并说明了自己的观点

Admittedly, sharing happiness and interests is the very first step to make friends. We can develop friendship much easier with people who have equal interests with us. Whatever it may be, say（chatting）, reading, music and so the forth, common interests and topics shorten distance between people who meet each other for the first time. Additionally, in the process of further communication in the following years of life, one may find it a great joy to get along with people of such kind. It is friendship that can make our life more vivid and colorful. And whatever the fun may be, whether spiritual or material, without possibility of having fun together（语意似乎有点重复）, any so-called friendship will finally disappear like the temporary tides.

这段是说have fun 是保持友谊的关键。但和第一段的观点患难之交的朋友比娱乐朋友重要不是关系太大。

按照第二段的内容应该是支持两种朋友都一样重要。It depends.

At the same time（感觉用连词while比较好，人生有乐也有悲）, our life is not always full of happiness, sorrows, horrent, and some other bad things will also accompany with happiness appearing in our life. When we confront these difficulties, assistance from friends is more crucial for us to get through these problems. Lily is one of the intimate friends of mine, and she helped me to overcome the hardest period of time in my life. When I graduate from college, I was not able to find a job, and had little money for my accommodation. It is lily who gave money to me and shared room to（with） me until I found a job. Thanks to her kindly help, I could get through the toughest time. The worst thing that everyone does not want to meet is that the formally intimate friends (改为娱乐朋友比较好) surprisingly disappear when you are in trouble; then you will find it disgusting that（表达不是很清楚） the former intercourses are only because he or she wanted to take advantages or make use of you. So you might get more cautious to make friends.

最后结尾的时候，可以总结下在这种情况下患难之交的朋友比娱乐朋友更重要。

From what we have been discussed above, we can safely draw conclusion that we need friends who can do favor to us when we need, because our life are always full of both happiness and trouble.

文章总体还流畅，不过有一些中式英语。另外逻辑还需要更严密些。建议多读些好文。

作者: 瓜瓜不瓜 时间: 2012-7-8 20:31
7.6 Do you agree with the viewpoint thatpeople are now easier to become educated than in the past?

红色为错误蓝色建议绿色段落小评
Have you ever thought about what change did the social development bring to people,faster transportation, better medical condition, or more convenient accommodation?When it comes to the question what have the social development provide, people usually hold different opinions. There is increasing number of people believethat education is one of the most significant change in people’s live; it hasbeen much easier than the past. However, others people do not agree with theabove statement, because the tuition has become much higher than the past dueto the improvement of the society. The situation would be tougher for those poor people who wanted to achieve education（搭配不妥，get educated即可）. From my standpoint; the education has become easier than the past, because many useful resources and policies have reduced the difficulties of many people to be educated.（表达略有点不顺，小小斟酌下吧，我想了下，不如改成定语从句：difficulities that happen on the way people pursuit knowledge.）开头段略微有点过长了，特别是有些人觉得。。。有些人觉得不是，这个其实可以不写的。。

At the very beginning, it is universally acknowledged that the efforts of the local governments have already made education easier for all the people to access, In China, the rights to go to primary schools of the children is statutory, whichmeans that the any one who forbid children to go school will be punished. Moreover,the governments have spared no efforts to reduce the tuition of primaryeducation. The primary school education is now free to all the children. So a sthe result, children, especially whose families are very poor, can receivee ducation much easier than in the past. (中国义务教育的例子很好哈！)

Furthermore,the development of society has encouraged diverse kinds of classes available （短语搭配问题，encourage sth/sb to ...）for people who want to learn some knowledge that can not be offered by traditional schools. Take my mother as an example, she is a big fan of cooking,but without sufficient classes for her to attend, she was compelled to give up the desire of learning cooking in the past. However, the situation has changed,thousands and thousands of education classes are provide in my city, amongthem, wine tasting and foreign languages and cooking classes are the mos tpopular ones.(这句和这个段落的表达都显得无关，你可以改成是妈妈喜欢这几个课程) So that, my mother can easily gets educated ~~about classes~~about cookingnow. My mother’s case is not rare, 两个完整句直接需要有连词many people have benefited from theseclasses.

What is more important is that the development of the technology. High technology gives people a new way to be educated. No one can deny that the internet plays an extremely important role in education. Thanks to the help of the internet, the distance education based on internet let millions of people to get educated easier.Getting into the habits of learning from distance education, people do not need to travel thousands miles to attend class. Many researches have indicated thatthe number of people who receive education from distance education is equal tothe number of people who attend traditional classes. How crucial is internet to ease people getting educated.

From what we have discussed, we can safely draw conclusion that people now get educatedeasier than in the past, because of the governments’ effort and developments oftechnology.

总：写的很好哈。例子很好，就是表达上一些小瑕疵以后尽量完善，进步很大！鼓掌撒花！

作者: kchszy061ban 时间: 2012-7-8 20:46

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

The reading passage and the lecture discussed about whether the ethanol fuel is a good alternative to gasoline. The reading passage held the opinion that ethanol was not a good replacement for gasoline based on three main reasons. But the professor in the lecture thought all of these reasons were not convincing, and he raised several points to refute the ideas of the reading passage.

First of all, the professor argued that the use of ethanol would not increase the problems lead by global warming. Admittedly, burning ethanol would release carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, but growing process of the plants, by which ethanol was mainly made, will counteract the release of the carbon dioxide. Plants absorb carbondioxide as a kind of nutrition when they were growing. So that, the carbondioxide released to the atmosphere was actually the plants removed from atmosphere previously. This was where speaker disagreed with the writer.

Moreover, according to the professor, the production of ethanol would not reduce the amount of plants available for animals. The professor pointed out that people could utilize the uneatable parts of plants to make ethanol. So that, the amount of plant that could feed animals will not be influenced by producing ethanol. This was another part where experience contradicted theory.

The final evidence the speaker adopted to jeopardize the passage was that the price of ethanol would drop down after more people begin to use it. The professor explained that when more people start to use ethanol fuel, the factories could increase its production. It is common that the more yield of the mass production; the cheaper priceof this（the） production will be. If three times more people in the United States start to use ethanol, the price would drop down 40%. This was entirely opposed to the passage.

不错，不错，丹尼写到了三百字。

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-8 23:49

7.6 Do you agree with the viewpoint thatpeople are now easier to become educated than in the past?

红色为错误蓝色建议绿色段落小评
Have you ever thought about what change did the social development bring to people,faster transportation, better medical condition, or more convenient accommodation?When it comes to the question what have the social development provide, people usually hold different opinions. There is increasing number of people believethat education is one of the most significant change in people’s live; it hasbeen much easier than the past. However, others people do not agree with theabove statement, because the tuition has become much higher than the past dueto the improvement of the society. The situation would be tougher for those poor people who wanted to achieve education（搭配不妥，get educated即可）. From my standpoint; the education has become easier than the past, because many useful resources and policies have reduced the difficulties of many people to be educated.（表达略有点不顺，小小斟酌下吧，我想了下，不如改成定语从句：difficulities that happen on the way people pursuit knowledge.）开头段略微有点过长了，特别是有些人觉得。。。有些人觉得不是，这个其实可以不写的。。

At the very beginning, it is universally acknowledged that the efforts of the local governments have already made education easier for all the people to access, In China, the rights to go to primary schools of the children is statutory, whichmeans that the any one who forbid children to go school will be punished. Moreover,the governments have spared no efforts to reduce the tuition of primaryeducation. The primary school education is now free to all the children. So a sthe result, children, especially whose families are very poor, can receivee ducation much easier than in the past. (中国义务教育的例子很好哈！)

Furthermore,the development of society has encouraged diverse kinds of classes available （短语搭配问题，encourage sth/sb to ...）for people who want to learn some knowledge that can not be offered by traditional schools. Take my mother as an example, she is a big fan of cooking,but without sufficient classes for her to attend, she was compelled to give up the desire of learning cooking in the past. However, the situation has changed,thousands and thousands of education classes are provide in my city, amongthem, wine tasting and foreign languages and cooking classes are the mos tpopular ones.(这句和这个段落的表达都显得无关，你可以改成是妈妈喜欢这几个课程) So that, my mother can easily gets educated ~~about classes~~about cookingnow. My mother’s case is not rare, 两个完整句直接需要有连词many people have benefited from theseclasses.

What is more important is that the development of the technology. High technology gives people a new way to be educated. No one can deny that the internet plays an extremely important role in education. Thanks to the help of the internet, the distance education based on internet let millions of people to get educated easier.Getting into the habits of learning from distance education, people do not need to travel thousands miles to attend class. Many researches have indicated thatthe number of people who receive education from distance education is equal tothe number of people who attend traditional classes. How crucial is internet to ease people getting educated.

From what we have discussed, we can safely draw conclusion that people now get educatedeasier than in the past, because of the governments’ effort and developments oftechnology.

总：写的很好哈。例子很好，就是表达上一些小瑕疵以后尽量完善，进步很大！鼓掌撒花！

-- by 会员瓜瓜不瓜 (2012/7/8 20:31:51)

谢谢瓜瓜的鼓励~我会继续独立向你们学习哒~加油捏~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-8 23:50

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

不错，不错，丹尼写到了三百字。

-- by 会员 kchszy061ban (2012/7/8 20:46:00)

谢谢banban帮我修改呢~加油哈~

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-9 00:56
7.8 TPO 23
The reading passage and thelecturer discussed about the reasons why the population of yellow cedardeclined significantly. The reading material asserted three hypotheses toexplain this decline, but the professor thought none of these hypotheses are adequateand he raised several points to refute the idea of passage.

First of all, the professorargued that the healthy yellow cedar is much more resistance to the cedar barkbeetle than many other trees. because barks of the yellow cedars contained onekind of powerful chemical, which was poison to the beetles. The yellow cedarswhich were attacked by bark beetles are more likely to be dying and sick trees.This was where the speaker disagreed with the writer.

Moreover, according to theprofessor the brow bear would not cause the decline of yellow cedars. Yellowcedars are growing both on the main land and the island of the North America,and they decreased all over the northwestern North America.But the brow bears did not live on the island. So as a result, the declinewould occur no matter with or without the appearance of brow bears. This wasanother part where experience contradicted theory.

The final evidencethe speaker adopted to jeopardize the passage is that the effect of frozentemperate would not lead to the decline of the yellow cedars. The professorclaimed that the actual phenomenon of the yellow cedar’s decreasing was totallydifferent from the idea of the passage. Actually, more trees were dying on thelower elevation than the trees lived on higher elevation. If lower temperaturedamaged the roots of the yellow cedars, they would decline more in the colderareas, which usually located in high elevation. So the sensitive of roots tocolder temperature could not be the reason of yellow cedars declining. This wasentirely opposed to the professor's standpoint.

作者: 瓜瓜不瓜 时间: 2012-7-9 14:35
丹尼，我综合和独立都已经写好啦，等你批改哦

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-9 18:11
7.8 One of your classmates needs help with someschoolwork. Which solution would you recommend your classmate should do to askyou for help or to find a professional tutor for help?

Haveyou ever faced some difficulties when doing schoolwork? How would you solvethese problems, asking one of you classmates or getting solutions by your own?If one of your friends needs some help with some schoolwork, will you offerhelp to your friend? When it comes to the question whether should people assisttheir classmates to get through problems of schoolwork or recommend aprofessional tutor for help, people usually held different opinions. From mystandpoint, I would recommend a professional tutor to my classmate, because itwould be more efficiently and productively.

Atthe very beginning, the guidance from a professor tutor is more efficiently. Becausethe professional tutors may have met the same question thousands and thousandstimes, they would have the answer in short time, even at the first glance atthe question. It is more time saving that my classmate asks help from tutors.Once my classmate asked a very tough question about geometric. I had spentabout three hours to figure out that question, and my classmate had to wait forthree hours to get the answer. But the situation was totally different when Iasked the same question to my geometric tutor, she told me the answer and therelative regulates at the time when she looked at the first line of the question.Less than one minute had she got the answer. So that, with adequate experiencesof the certain field, professional tutor would solve problems more efficiently.

Moreover,some times professional tutor could not only teach students the answers ofdifferent questions, but also provide the proper learning skills of thosesubjects. It is universally acknowledged that a professional tutor must haveencountered variety kinds of students. From those experiences they couldsummary some typical and general weaknesses of the students who have problemsabout schoolwork and help those to strengthen those weaknesses. Let us take myyounger brother as an example; he is very clever and studying in high school. Hisperformance of the mathematics used to leave much to be desired; even he hadspared no effort to learn it. His mother hired a professional tutor to give ahand of his math. With two months learning with this tutor, my brother got avery excellent grade on math mid term exam. He said that thanks to the guidancefrom the tutor, he had already learned extremely large number of useful skillsto solve mathematics’ problems. These skills have corrected some inappropriatebehaviors when he learn math. My brother’s case is not rare; a survey onimpacts of professional tutor has indicated that more than half students havedeveloped correct study behaviors from tutors.

Admittedly,assisting my classmate to solve problem would help both my classmate and I tograsp the relevant knowledge better. From discussion and exchanging opinions,we could understand the problems better and develop the interpersonal andcommunicating skills, which are quite essential for our future academic studyand career. But schools also provide different ways to students to practiceinterpersonal and communication skills, discussions about schoolwork may seemto be unnecessary.

Fromwhat we have been discussed above, we could safely draw conclusion that recommendinga professional tutor would be a better choice because tutors are not only moreefficient but could tell the correct learning methods.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-9 20:12
7.9 TPO 24

Thereading passage and the professor discussed about the evidences of the tissues foundin 70-million-year-old fossil of Tyrannosaurus rex. The passage asserted threemain evidences about the tissue in the fossils; however the professor thoughtall of these evidences are skeptical, and he raised several points to refutethe idea of the passage.

Firstof all, the professor argued that the soft substance found in the fossilizedleg bone were not necessary remain of the vessels. Those soft substances wouldbe something else, like bacterial. The professor explained that the bacterialwould grow in the hollows of bones after T. rex died and would leave organicmaterial in the hollows. These organic materials were easily considered to bethe trace as vessel. This was where speaker did not agree with the passage.
Moreover,according to the professor, the iron-a-material would not be the red bloodcells of the T.rex. The professor claimed that the spheres also were found inother animals’ fossils, even in some animals that did not contain any bloodcells. It is absolute that the animal which did not contain any blood cellswould not contain any blood cells in their fossils. As a result, the ironspheres might probably come from other animals. This was another part whereexperience the contradicted theory.

Thefinal evidence adopted by lecturer to jeopardize passage is that the collagencould not maintain 70-million years. The collagen could never be older than100,000 years from the idea of the time of collagen lasting. 70-million yearswas too long to be possible. The professor said that the collagen detected fromthe fossils may come from other recent resources. He pointed out it may comefrom the hand of the researchers who hold the bones. This was entirely opposedto the passage’s viewpoint.

作者: T不死 时间: 2012-7-10 02:37
独立 7.8
Have you ever faced some difficulties when doing schoolwork? How would you solve these problems, asking one of you classmates or getting solutions by your own? If one of your friends needs some help with some schoolwork, will you offer help to your friend? When it comes to the question whether should people assist their classmates to get through problems of schoolwork or recommend a professional tutor for help, people usually held different opinions. From my stand point, I would recommend a professional tutor to my classmate, because it would be more efficiently and productively.

开头的模板用得不错，赞一个。

At the very beginning, 建议更改为to begin with，貌似at the very beginning是刚开始的意思the guidance from a professorprofessional tutor is more efficiently. Because the professional tutors may have met the same question thousands and thousands times, they would have the answer in short time, even at the first glance at the question. It is more time saving that my classmate asks help from tutors建议更改为it will save lots of time for me classmates to ask help from tutors. Once my classmate asked a very tough question about geometric. I had spent about three hours to figure out that question, and my classmate had to wait for three hours to get the answer.感觉句子有点简单，可以用连词not until。 But the situation was totally different when I asked the same question to my geometric tutor, she told me the answer and the relative regulates at the time when感觉when 和at the same time重复了 she looked at the first line of the question. Less than one minute had she got the answer. So that这个用法好像木有见过啊, with adequate experiences of the certain field, professional tutor would solve problems more efficiently.

Moreover, sometimes professional tutor could not only teach students the answers of different questions, but also provide the proper learning skills of those subjects. It is universally acknowledged that a professional tutor must have encountered variety kinds of students. From those experiences they could summary some typical and general weaknesses of the students who have problems about schoolwork and help those to strengthen those weaknesses.（感觉太多those了，可以用定语从句，或者同位语从句修饰） Let us take my younger brother as an example; he is very clever and studying in high school. His performance of the mathematics used to leave much to be desired（木有看懂了，可能是偶寡闻了）; even he had spared no effort to learn it. His mother hired a professional tutor to give a hand of his math. Withwithin two months learning with this tutor, my brother got a very excellent grade on math mid- term exam. He said that thanks to the guidance from the tutor, he had already learned extremely large number of useful skills to solve mathematics’ problems.Under the guidance of the tutor, my younger brother has master different methods and skills to solve mathematics’ problems, and he can apply these skills freely in the math test. These skills have corrected some inappropriate behaviors when he learn math. My brother’s case is not rare; a survey on impacts of professional tutor has indicated that more than half students have developed correct study behaviors from tutors.

Admittedly, assisting my classmate to solve problem would help both my classmate and I to grasp the relevant knowledge better. FromThrough discussion and exchanging opinions, we could understand the problems better and develop the interpersonal and communicating skills, which are quite essential for our future academic study and career. But schools also provide different ways to students to practice interpersonal and communication skills, discussions about schoolwork may seem to be unnecessary.

From what we have been discussed above, we could safely draw conclusion that recommending a professional tutor would be a better choice because tutors are not only more efficient but could tell the correct learning methods.
篇幅够长，文章饱满。如果能够把例子中的简单句改为复杂句子，就会更好。

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-10 17:38
7.9 Doyou agree with the viewpoint that the most important investment of a company isto improve the skills of its employees.

Have you ever worked with a highefficient group? Have you ever worked in a high equipped office? What aspectsdo you regard as the most important investment of a company, the projects ofthe company, the instruments of office, or the quality of the employees? Whenit comes to the question whether improving the skills of its employees is themost important investment for a company, people usually hold differentopinions. From my standpoint, I believed that enhancing the skills of theemployees is the most crucial part for a company to invest.

To begin with, more skillful employeeswould provide the company more benefit. It is universally acknowledged that thequality of the employees stands for the quality of this company. Working withthe more skillful and professional employees, the costumers of this companywill feel more confident and willing to cooperate to this company. As theresult, the more costumers are appealed to work with this cooperate, the moreprofit this company will have. From my own experience, I had worked in amedical company, and my most important costumers are doctors in the hospitals. Inorder to help us be familiar with the products more quickly, the company hadpaid much money and time on training. Consequently, one month later, we coulddiscuss the professional questions with doctors, and show the best characteristicsof our products to our costumers. Thanks to the well understanding of ourproducts, more and more doctors are cline to use our products. At the sametime, my company has gain more profit. My case is not rare, more and morecompanies have benefit from training to employees.

Moreover, getting more training aboutskills will strengthen employees’ loyalty to this company. From different typesof trainings, employees would feel they are of much care from the company, sothat they would not be willing to change a job easily. It is conceivable that companieswould also receive huge beneficial, if they do not have to pay much attentionand money to hire more new people. A survey from a global Human Resourceservice company indicated that the company whose employees receive lesstraining would be more probable to quit the job. And the general management feespending to recruiting new employees will be double than the company whoprovide variety trainings. So from this survey, we can easily find out thatwhat an extremely important role of providing trainings to employees to acompany.

Admittedly, improving the skills of theemployees is not the only thing that the company has to invest. Some otherfactors are also of the great importance to the company, such as computers, the speed of theinternet, and the systems used in working. These instruments are very vital tohelp employees work efficiently. If the basic devices of the company leave muchto be desired, the company performance would also be negatively influenced. Themore time that employees spend on waiting for computer getting ready,downloading documents from internet, the less time they will spend to work. Sothat, the company’s profit would inevitable be reduced.

Fromwhat we have been discussed above, we could safely draw conclusion thatimproving the skills of the employees would be the most important investmentfor the company, because it could bring more benefit to this company. It isapparent that the company, who blind to this point, would pay much.

作者: remint 时间: 2012-7-10 18:53
Have you ever worked with a highefficient group? Have you ever worked in a high equipped office? What aspectsdo you regard as the most important investment of a company, the projects of the company, the instruments（equiptment） of office, or the quality of the employees? Whenit comes to the question whether improving the skills of its employees is themost important investment for a company, people usually hold differentopinions. From my standpoint, I believed that enhancing the skills of theemployees is the most crucial part for a company to invest.

To begin with, more skillful employeeswould provide the company more benefit. It is universally acknowledged that thequality of the employees stands for the quality of this company. Working with(这句话的主语是costomers 我觉得改为served by更好一点)the more skillful and professional employees, the costumers of this companywill feel more confident and willing to cooperate to this company. As the（a）result, the more costumers are appealed to ~~work with this~~ cooperate, the moreprofit this company will have. From my own experience, I had worked in amedical company, and my most important costumers are doctors in the hospitals. Inorder to help us be familiar with the products more quickly, the company hadpaid much money and time on training. Consequently, one month later, we coulddiscuss the professional questions with doctors, and show the best characteristicsof our products to our costumers. Thanks to the well understanding of ourproducts, more and more doctors are clined to use our products. At the sametime, my company has gain more profits. My case is not rare, more and morecompanies have benefited from training to employees.

Moreover, getting more training aboutskills will strengthen employees’ loyalty to this company. From different typesof trainings, employees would feel they are of much care from the company, sothat they would not be willing to change a job easily. It is conceivable that companieswould also receive huge beneficial benefits, if they do not have to pay much attentionand money to hire more new people（it is 引导的句子一般后面不用从句因为会造成后面从句的指代不清）. A survey from a global Human Resourceservice company indicated（后面都用的一般时改成 indicates吧。。。） that the company whose employees receive lesstraining would be more probable to quit the job. And the general management feespending to recruiting（spend in doing。。。） new employees will be double than the company whoprovide variety trainings（double sth 动词用在比较级其次后面跟的是比较对象 that +句子吧。。）. So from this survey, we can easily find out thatwhat an extremely important role of providing trainings to employees to acompany（从句+感叹句感觉没讲过这么用的呢~是不是可以简化点~）.

Admittedly, improving the skills of theemployees is not the only thing that the company has to invest. Some otherfactors are also of ~~the~~ great importance to the company, such as computers, the speed of theinternet, and the systems used in working. These instruments are very vital tohelp employees work efficiently. If the basic devices of the company leave muchto be desired, the company‘s performance would also be negatively influenced. Themore time that employees spend on waiting for computer getting ready,downloading documents from internet, the less time they will spend to work. Sothat, the company’s profit would inevitable be reduced.
全文用了3 4句 the。。。er the。。er啊、、、、
Fromwhat we have been discussed above, we could safely draw conclusion thatimproving the skills of the employees would be the most important investmentfor the company, because it could bring more benefits to this（the） company. It isapparent that the company, who blind to this point, would pay much（heavy price）.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-10 19:03
7.10 TPO1
The reading passage and the lecture discussedabout the impact of reducing employee's working day into four days. The readingpassage asserted that the four-day work policy would benefit to the company,employees and the economy. The professor in the lecture thought that the policywould not have good influence, and he raised several points to refute the ideaof the passage.

First of all, the professor claimed thatshortened workweek would probable force companies spend much more than a five-dayworkweek. The lecturer explained that hiring more employees meant that thecompanies had to spend more on training and medical benefit. The companieswould pay the same amount of money to the health benefit of one employee nomatter s/he work five days or four days. Hiring more employees means morehealth benefits. Moreover, the companies had to offer more space and computersfor more employees. This would definitely cut into companies’ profit. This wasthe where speaker disagreed with the passage.

Moreover, according to the professor, therewould not be more jobs available for people. As he had discussed previously,more jobs always meant to higher cost, so the companies would probably asktheir employees to work over time. And the company would raise expectation toemployees to finish the same amount of tasks which they spend five days tofinish. As the result, no jobs would be available, even jobs would become less pleasant.This was another part experience the contradicted theory.

The final point adopted by speaker to jeopardizethe idea of the passage is that shortened workweek would present risk toemployees. And it would decrease the career opportunities for the employees whowork four days. The company would prefer to grant the promotion to those employeeswho work five days; because companies believed that working five days wouldensure employees to take charge of the business of the whole week. This wasentirely opposed to the idea of the passage.

作者: qianjun06 时间: 2012-7-11 11:12
7.10 TPO1 批改
The reading passage and the lecture discussedabout the impact of reducing employee's working day into four days. The readingpassage asserted that the four-day work policy would benefit to the company,employees and the economy. The professor in the lecture thought that the policywould not have good influence, and he raised several points to refute the ideaof the passage.

First of all, the professor claimed thatshortened workweek would probable force companies spend much more than a five-dayworkweek does. The lecturer explained that hiring more employees meant that thecompanies had to spend more on training and medical benefit. The companieswould pay the same amount of money to the health benefit of one employee nomatter s/he work five days or four days. Hiring more employees means morehealth benefits. Moreover, the companies had to offer more space and computersfor more employees. This would definitely cut into companies’ profit. This wasthe where speaker disagreed with the passage.

Moreover, according to the professor, therewould not be more jobs available for people. As he had discussed previously,more jobs always meant to higher cost, so the companies would probably asktheir employees to work over time. And the company would raise expectation toemployees to finish the same amount of tasks which they spend five days tofinish. As the result, no jobs would be available, even jobs would become less pleasant.This was another part experience the contradicted theory.

The final point adopted by speaker to jeopardizethe idea of the passage is that shortened workweek would present risk toemployees. And it would decrease the career opportunities for the employees whowork four days. The company would prefer to grant the promotion to those employeeswho work five days; because companies believed that working five days wouldensure employees to take charge of the business of the whole week. This wasentirely opposed to the idea of the passage.

听的蛮全的

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-11 17:01
7.11 TPO2

The readingpassage and the lecture discussed about the impact of the team working. Thereading passage asserted that the group working was the best way to approachcertain new projects. While, the professor did not agree with the passage, andhe raised several points to refute the idea of the reading passage.

First of all,the professor claimed that from a research of a company, many of the members inthe teams are free riders. It means that they were not involved in the projectat all. The person who really works hard in the team received less beneficial,because if the project went on well, people would recognize the contribution tothe whole team, no name was named when rewarding. On the other side, if theproject failed, people would blame all members. This was where the speakerdisagreed with passage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the team would not work more quickly. Because thewhole team needs a long time to reach concession. They had to spend much timeon meeting, discussing until they got the conclusion. This was another partwhere experience contradicted theory.

The finalevidence the speaker adopted to jeopardize the idea of the passage is that theideas from team working would not be creative, and the team members would notfeel "shine" during working. The professor explained that there areone or two influential people in the team. Most of the members would follow theopinions of the influential people directly instead of further discussion. Ifthe influential people believed one solution might not work, all the restmembers would give up this solution, even this solution was very creative. Atthe same time, if influential people considered one idea of highly creative,the whole team would follow this idea. They would even ignore the warning ofother people. This was entirely opposed to the idea of the passage.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-7-11 18:38
7.10 Do you agree with the followingstatement that patience is usually not a good strategy, we should take actionnow rather than later

Do you rush to work every morning? Do youfeel that the speed of our life become more and more fast? Have you everconsider living under the society with the extremely growing speed, patiencewould no longer be a good strategy? When it comes to question whether thepatience is still a good strategy in nowadays, people usually hold differentopinions. Some people thought that it is a waste of time to be patient in thisrush world. From my standpoint, I believed that no matter how fast is thesociety development, patience is always a good strategy before taking actions.

To begin with, patience would give peopleextra time to perfect our plan before action. It is common that people makedecision too hurry to find out the proper solutions. In some situations, peoplewent on the wrong direction just because they lost patience to make a plan andcheck whether the direction is correct. In those circumstances, peoplecompelled to pay a very high price to their mistake. Let us take my self as anexample, I used to be very impatient and like to take actions once I got themission. Once in a mathematic exam, the last question in the test was too hardto comprehend totally and correctly. I could not help to wait to calculate atonce, but after five minutes writing, I found out that I totally misunderstoodthe meaning of the task. However, I had no time to change my answer, and I lostthe whole score of that task. As a result, I failed to pass that exam, and hadto attend some classes to finish that course. Due to my impatience, I hadwasted a lot of time and energy to the extra classes. From my experience, wecan readily figure out that planning patiently at first is the most import stepbefore action.

Moreover, in most cases, we also need patientto wait for the result of the previous step. Because it takes time for thingschange. In order to get the result as rapid as possible, some people takeaction immediately after the previous step. However, many cases went to theopposite direction as they expected. Many people want to recover from diseaseas soon as possible, so that they take pills once and once again without waitingpills working in their body. As a result, they can not cure their diseasequickly, but also would probably suffer from other diseases caused by too manypills. The results would leave much to be desired, if people can not waitpatiently during the process of doing things.

Admittedly, it is universally acknowledgedthat taking action is also of the great importance. No matter how well the planis, without action people would never realize the dream. For example, somepeople want to learn English. If s/he only plan the study schedule once andonce again, without taking first step to try to talk with some foreigners inEnglish. S/he would never harness speaking English.

From what we have discussed, we cansafely draw conclusion that patience is still good strategy for nowadays peoplebecause we need patience to plan and wait for the result.

作者: 包子不包子 时间: 2012-7-13 07:48
7.9 TPO 24

Thereading passage and the professor discussed about the evidences of the tissues foundin 70-million-year-old fossil of Tyrannosaurus rex. The passage asserted threemain evidences about the tissue in the fossils; however the professor thoughtall of these evidences are were skeptical, and he raised several points to refutethe idea of the passage.

Firstof all, the professor argued that the soft substance found in the fossilizedleg bone were not necessary remain of the vessels. Those soft substances wouldbe something else, like bacterial. The professor explained that the bacterialwould grow in the hollows of like bones after T. rex died and would leave organicmaterial in the hollows. These organic materials were easily considered to bethe trace as vessel. This was where speaker did not agree with the passage.

Moreover,according to the professor, the iron-a-material would not be the red bloodcells of the T.rex. The professor claimed that the spheres also were found inother animals’ fossils, even in some animals that did not contain any bloodcells. It is absolute that the animal which did not contain any blood cellswould not contain any blood cells in their fossils.这句话没有和sphere联系上啊 As a result, the ironspheres might probably come from other animals. This was another part whereexperience the contradicted theory.

Thefinal evidence adopted by lecturer to jeopardize passage is that the collagencould not maintain 70-million years. The collagen could never be older than100,000 years from the idea of the time of collagen lasting. 70-million yearswas too long to be possible. The professor said that the collagen detected fromthe fossils may come from other recent resources. He pointed out it may comefrom the hand of the researchers who hold the bones. This was entirely opposedto the passage’s viewpoint.

丹尼有些细节没有听出来导致第二段叙述不准确哦另外感觉有些句子可以合起来写除了在段末总结的地方其他地方也应该适当运用连词哦
包子的听力是少不了练得。。。
在听的时候会听那些在写作时会用到的东西只记关键词但是只记关键词在看要知道自己想说什么所以只有笔记是不够的额还要用脑袋
还是多练吧练多久了就有适合自己的方法了~~
加油哦！！

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-12-4 18:08
12.3独立：Agree or disagree? Your job has more effect on your happiness than your social life does?

Have you ever consider how to live a happy life? To find a wonderful job, to travel around the world, or to have a colorful social life? When it comes to the question, different people hold different opinions. Some people believe that jobs effect on our happiness the most, however other people agree that the social life could benefit us more on the happiness of our life. From my standpoint, I totally agree that the social life would do more than job on our happiness.

Admittedly, most of us could not live without jobs. But the truly happy life is not based on how much estate that people have. It is the job that brings us enough money to maintain daily life, purchase luxury cars and bags, and even travel around world. Some of us believe that the money which are brought by jobs make us life happier, so that they consistently work very hard, and save every penny as possible as they could. They forget their initiative to get a job, and all they care about is only the number of money they had saved. Could those people be thought to life a happy life? I do not think so. Their so-called happy life is just built on the money, once they lost all the money, their happy would collapse immediately.

Moreover, the job itself would sometimes damage our happiness. The rebuke from boss, the complaints from clients and the competition from colleagues would definitely ruin our life and bring more pressure. Too much concerns and worries block us from living a happy life. Take myself as an example, I used to be a happy girl when I was in collage, but after I got a job, everything has changed. As a freshman in a company, I had to respect every colleague in my company, even someone who treated my bad. Although I was very angry to them, I could not quarrel with them because I am afraid to leave the bad impression to my colleagues. During that time, I could not feel any happiness that brought by job, and my previous happy life has ruined by job. So I believe the people who faced same situation as mine would agree with me that the job could damage the happiness of our live.

On the contrary, social life would effect on our happiness to great extent no matter people agree or not, and it has a great impact on our happiness in most of cases. We live in a world that requires us connect with other people consistently, no one could refuse to have social life unless s/he live on a lonely island. Let us take myself experience as an example again. I still remember the frustrated life of being a freshman in my company. The only thing I could do is to talk with my friends about my difficulties. Luckily, all of my friends gave me great assistance, we shared upset experiences with each other, went to the countryside to reveal and embrace the beauty of nature, and sometimes just sit together in a sofa to see movies. Thanks to their help, I finally went through those tough day, and , because of my social life, my feeling of happiness become even more stronger than when I was in collage. As a result, social life cues the sorrow brought by job and makes me even stronger.

As what we have discussed above, I believe that social life has more effect than job on our happiness.

作者: 晨依Jacqueline 时间: 2012-12-4 22:27
红色为错误，蓝色为修改建议，高亮绿色为精彩！
Have you ever consider(ed)how to live a happy life? To find a wonderful job, to travel around the world, or to have a colorful social life? When it comes to the question, different people hold different opinions. Some people believe that jobs effect(affect) on our happiness the most, however other people agree that the social life could benefit us more on the happiness of our life. From my standpoint, I totally agree that the social life would do more than job on our happiness.

Admittedly, most of us could not live without jobs. But the truly happy life is not based on how much estate that people have.It is the job that brings us enough money to maintain daily life, purchase luxury cars and bags, and even travel around world. Some of us believe that the money ~~which are~~ brought by jobs make(s)us(our) life happier, so that they consistently work very hard, and save every penny as possible as they could. They forget their initiative to get a job, and all they care about is only the number of money they had saved. Could those people be thought to life(live) a happy life? I do not think so. Their so-called happy life is just built on the money, (and)once they lost all the money, their happy would collapse immediately.

Moreover, the job itself would sometimes damage our happiness. The rebuke from boss, the complaints from clients and the competition from colleagues would definitely ruin our life and bring more pressure. Too much concerns and worries block us from living a happy life. Take myself as an example, I used to be a happy girl when I was in collage(college), but after I got a job, everything has changed. As a freshman in a company, I had to respect every colleague ~~in my company~~, even someone who treated my bad. Although I was very angry to them, I could not quarrel with them because I am(was) afraid to leave the(a) bad impression to my colleagues. During that time, I could not feel any happiness(happy) that brought by job, and my previous happy life has ruined by job. So I believe the people who faced same situation as mine would agree with me that the job could damage the happiness of our live(life).

On the contrary, social life wouldeffect(affect)on our happiness to great extent no matter people agree or not, and it has a great impact on our happiness in mostofcases. We live in a world that requires us connect with other people consistently, (+连词so )no one could refuse to have social life unless s/he live on a lonely island. Let us take myself(my own)experience as an example again. I still remember the frustrated life of being a freshman in my company. The only thing I could do is(was) to talk with my friends about my difficulties. Luckily, all of my friends gave me great assistance, (and)we shared upset experiences with each other, went to the countryside to reveal and embrace the beauty of nature, and sometimes just sit(sat) together in a sofa to see movies. Thanks to their help, I finally went through those tough day(s), and , because of my social life, my feeling of happiness become(became) even more stronger than when I was in collage(college). As a result, social life cues the sorrow brought by job and makes me even stronger.

As what we have discussed above, I believe that social life has more effect than job on our happiness. （结尾略显单薄，建议能够加一句话最后强调啊升华一下神马的。）

感觉小丹尼的作文思路还不错，但是小的语法错误太多了（动词时态、单复数、拼写等等），这样会很影响你的分数的。第二点是在很多句子的表达方面过于啰嗦了，而且句间的连接做得不是很好，比如你在讲你的例子的时候要6句以上，但是你的句子却大多数都是单句（还有一点就是有的句子写成了run-on sentence注意加上连词呀！）字数足足的没的说，但是我觉得如果想再往高分提升的话还需要注意简洁高效呀。想想怎么改写能把自己的例子浓缩成更加精华。加油呀！

作者: 晨依Jacqueline 时间: 2012-12-4 22:57
关于简洁高效的表达，推荐你看看这个帖子
http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-712479-1-2.html

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-12-4 23:55
12.3 TPO 05
The passage and the professor in the lecture talked about the use of the settlements of Chaco Cayon in New Mexico. The passage raised three theories, but the professor in the lecture thought those three ideas were not convincing and disputed the passages from three aspects.

First of all, the passage asserted that the settlements were purely residential, because the style of the architecture was seen in more recent Southwest. However, the speaker did not agree with the reading material. He argued that the settlements may look like apartment buildings from outside, but from inside, the space reflect that people could not live there. The professor gave further explanation that the number of the fire places in settlements could not support the number of people that the rooms in settlements could contain. The fire places in the settlements could support only ten families, while the room in the settlement could contain 100 families. This is the first place that experience the paradox.

Secondly, according to the passage, the Chaco structures were used to store food supplies. Since the main crop of the Chaco people was grain maize. But the lecturer disagreed with that theory. He said that this theory was unsupportable because no trace of the maize or container was discovered in the structure. If the structure was used to contain maize, people should at least find maize flakes on the floor. This point is totally different with the passage.

The final evidence that speaker used to refute the idea of the passage is that the old materials which were used to support the settlements were used as a ceremonial center in one house might be just trash. The professor explained the building materials were not used up by Chaco people and left in the settlements. The food such as pork in one house may also be just regular trash. The professor pointed out the those material were not good evidence.

作者: DanielleZ 时间: 2012-12-4 23:56

关于简洁高效的表达，推荐你看看这个帖子
http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-712479-1-2.html

-- by 会员晨依Jacqueline (2012/12/4 22:57:37)

收到，我去看看～谢啦～

作者: 晨依Jacqueline 时间: 2012-12-5 19:34
The passage and the professor in the lecture talked about the use of the settlements of Chaco Cayon in New Mexico. The passage raised three theories, but the professor in the lecture thought those three ideas were not convincing and disputed the passages from three aspects.（开头不错！）

First of all, the passage asserted that the settlements were purely residential, because the style of the architecture was seen in more recent Southwest. However, the speaker did not agree with the reading material. He argued that the settlements may（might） look like apartment buildings from outside, but from inside, the space reflect（ed） that people could not live there. The professor gave further explanation that the number of the fire places in settlements could not support the number of people that the rooms in settlements could contain. The fire places in the settlements could support only ten families, while the room in the settlement could contain 100 families. This is（was） the first place that experience the paradox.
（建议句子之间的衔接能够更加完美，加上几个连词。）
Secondly, according to the passage, the Chaco structures were used to store food supplies. Since the main crop of the Chaco people was grain maize.（这不是一句话，和前面连起来吧。） But the lecturer disagreed with that theory. He said that this theory was unsupportable because no trace of the maize or container was discovered in the structure. If the structure was used to contain maize, people should at least find maize flakes on the floor. This point is（was） totally different with the passage.

The final evidence that speaker used to refute the idea of the passage is that（没有错误，但是感觉还是写得有点啰嗦了，可以看看一些范文里面是怎么表达的。）the old materials which were used to support the settlements were used as a ceremonial center in one house might be just trash.（这个句子从整体上来看就是结构不好。虽然长，但是不清晰。）The professor explained the building materials were not used up by Chaco people and left in the settlements. The food such as pork in one house may also be just regular trash. The professor pointed out the those material were not good evidence.

我觉得很大的一个问题是句子与句子之间少连接词，感觉一个意群一个意群地往外蹦，但是这些东西又没有很好地黏连在一块像一篇完整的文章。另外就是表达方面了，啰嗦，不够简洁高效。最后一点就是其实用一般现在时来写就可以了。建议还可以加个小结尾总结。加油，小丹尼！

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