新g Argu 125 求拍~

ykhjy

125) The following appeared in a health newsletter.
A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of accidents caused by bicycling has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets, and they take more risks as a result. Thus there is clearly a call for the government to strive to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents by launching an education program that concentrates on the factors other than helmet use that are necessary for bicycle safety.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

In this newsletter, in order to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle, the writer recommends the government to launch an education program that concentrates on the factors other than helmet use. Based on two study concerning the use of helmet and the number of accidents caused by bicycling during the same ten-year period, the writer finds that with the higher rate of helmet use which are necessary for bicycle safety, the number of bicycling  accidents has increased much on the contrary. Then the writer assumes that it is the result of people's feeling safer with wearing helmet, thus it seems reasonable to accept the recommendation to educate bicycle riders to concentrate on the factors. However, it is in fact ill-conceived and reasons are as follows.

In the first place, based on the study concerning the number of accidents caused by bicycling has increased 200 percent, the writer seems to assume that this bicycling accidents problem was more serious than ever. However, it is possible that with population's increase, more people ride bicycles, then the number of accidents caused by bicycling has increased. Thus since it may be not a necessarily serious problem that there is a seemly large increase of the number of accidents caused bicycling, the recommendation may be unnecessary.  

In the second place, the writer makes an assumption that there is a necessary relationship between the higher rate of helmet use and larger number of bicycling accidents. However, there is no information about how many people in those serious injuries from bicycle accidents are wearing helmet. If all people in those serious injuries from bicycle accidents are not wearing helmet, it may be more important for government to educate people to wear helmet when they are riding a bicycle, thus the recommendation may be unreasonable.

Finally, the writer assumes that people feel safer since they are wearing helmet which is a thing to make people safer when ride a bicycle, thus government should educate those people to concentrates on the factors other than helmet use. However, there is no direct evidence to prove that all people who wear helmet feel safer and no evidence can substantiate those people are less careful than those who don't wear helmet. In fact, it can be an evidence that in this helmet aspect, people who wear helmet is more careful than those don't. Thus there is no basis for the recommendation to educate people to concentrate on the factors other than helmet use.  

In conclusion, only since two study are embodied during the same ten-year, the writer makes a inappropriate assumption that the larger number of bicycling accidents is due to higher rate of helmet use since people feel safer when they are riding with wearing helmet which is also just an assumption that the writer makes. Thus the writer's recommendation to launch an education program to make people concentrate on the factors other than helmet use is unpersuasive.

jz20000cn

这篇写得很好！

chendanlan

http://www.essayjudge.com/document_detail.php?doc_id=1292这一篇也可以