新人12.1一战，跪求众大神提作文改进意见。

flyws

这篇文章是在网上找的题目，是第一次完完整整的写完，对字数段落这些都还没整体概念上的把握，觉得自己的文字嗅觉不甚灵敏也怕抓不住考点。。。希望各位大虾能给点改进的建议，我会反省总结提高的，谢谢了!!!

Does technology make children less creative than in the past?

So far, technology is an indispensable part in daily life and it helped creating a lot of stuff during the past few decades. While it seems develop children’s mind in huge amount, I believe that the creativity among children is decreasing rather than having been improved.

Not surprisingly, creative thinking often comes from brainstorming when teamwork is available, so does in children. However, technology has somewhat set up a wall between individual child and their teams. For instance, electronic tablets and smartphones is thriving these years whilst at the same time it makes plenty of stuff so efficient that individuals can even deal with it alone, comparing to the team meeting in the past. Accordingly, when element of team is eliminated in creative process of childhood, the main source of creativity is absent.

Morover, due to the effective equipments and facilities which technology has provided children, they tend to be think in depth in decreasing frequency, causing concerns about their future creativity. It would cause serious problem as technology has replaced a big proportion in children’s ability. Undoubtedly, the ability to think seriously is a key factor for a child to become successful in the future. Getting dependence on the advanced technology among children is worldwide phenomenon nowadays, for example in China, a child who is a freshman in primary school kept asking his parents rudely for getting a calculator because he didn’t even want to solve simple math problems.

As technology is penetrating ordinary people’s lives, the change in ways of socialization is becoming apparent. Children is born to be in an active age, and technology even impetuses this process. When children’s spare time is occupied by anytime social activities enabled by the technology equipments, how could they squeeze time out to pay attention to something that is meaningful? By that I mean, children has so much energy everyday but social connection is appealing and takes up a large amount of time from them, thereby reading less and thinking less. A case study shows that due to the higher rate of coverage of social networks, children spend less time in reading cyclopedia books etc..

I believe I am not exaggerating the issue too much, because people all know that when something bring goods, they would also bring bads. Sincerely speaking, I hope parents should be aware that technology can kill children’s creativity in some ways, and though proper manners they could do something in advance to prevent it from happening.