ChaseDream
搜索
返回列表 发新帖
查看: 1595|回复: 2
打印 上一主题 下一主题

大家帮我看看作文好吗???马上就要考试了~~~

[复制链接]
楼主
发表于 2005-10-8 21:08:00 | 只看该作者

大家帮我看看作文好吗???马上就要考试了~~~

When it comes to the issue whether universities should limit students to attend classes only in one subject or they should permit students to take classes in many subjects, different people hold different opinions. But as for me, I am an advocator of the latter opinion that the university should give students freedom to choose different types of classes.


First reason is that by giving students different subject classes could automatically foster the learner some interest they need to farther study. There are so many new thoughts and knowledge emerging nowadays in such a fast changing society that it is hard to count on the belief that students could maintain all the knowledge they need only in university in a short limited period. Once the students attend many classes not related to their own major, the chance of meeting the classes they really prefer will be sharply increase thus fostering the interest to farther study even after their graduation. This will definitely be a better choice for the long run.


Secondly, by taking “unrelated” class will give students some inspirations or useful knowledge which could not be acquired during their major classes. Take my own experience for instance, as medical science students once I took an optional class in biology subject occasionally. During the class we share the latest biological technology breakthrough and unconsciously I learn some useful information and the methods to analyze the biological problem. These surely give me a lot of inspirations for my own subject when I work on a thesis concerning medical reaction problem.


As we have discussed the benefits students could obtain from teachers, we can not ignore that teachers could also be beneficiaries of students coming from other subjects. For instance, learners from mechanics may use the background information they learned from their own subjects to think out a mold of machine once appeared in the 18th century, when a history teacher taught a class about industrial revolution. The mold may be helpful for the teacher to break the thought chain of book to better understand the influence of industrial revolution.


Admittedly, the former thought that students should only attend the subject-related classes has its own advantage such as keeping students learn knowledge more systematically and thus naturally saving the students precious time. But after we talking about the benefits of acquiring interest, the inspirations given by other subject classes, the bilateral novel exchange between the learner and teachers, we can clearly and safely draw the conclusion that it is a wiser choice to permit students take classes in many subjects.  

沙发
发表于 2005-10-9 01:45:00 | 只看该作者

建议看一下模板,firstly, secondly, thirdly, admittedly,in sum之类的结构。你的论点感觉挺好的,三个支持加一个小让步,但是就托福作文来说,其实内容太长了,可以删除掉一个支持,把更多时间放在语法修辞上,比如修正一些太长的句子,按照意群重新组合一下表达方式.还有就是比如第三段第五行,你用uncounsciously表达“不知不觉就学到了一些旁门左类”什么的,这个词语是表示“无意识”的意思,而不是你这样的理解。所以除了结构之外还有一个建议就是用简单的方式去表达,少用过长的句子和拿不准的修饰词,简洁和言之有物吧。Personal opinion for reference



[此贴子已经被作者于2005-10-9 1:45:48编辑过]
板凳
发表于 2005-10-10 01:09:00 | 只看该作者

楼主D作文偶喜欢啊,因为没什么高难度的词,通俗易懂呀!呵呵!


不过实在长了点噢~~


我也是10T的所以顺便来借鉴一下,嘿嘿~`

您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 立即注册

Mark一下! 看一下! 顶楼主! 感谢分享! 快速回复:

所属分类: TOEFL / IELTS

近期活动

正在浏览此版块的会员 ()

手机版|ChaseDream|GMT+8, 2025-12-2 12:45
京公网安备11010202008513号 京ICP证101109号 京ICP备12012021号

ChaseDream 论坛

© 2003-2025 ChaseDream.com. All Rights Reserved.

返回顶部