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标题: Ningjie111的作文贴！求狠批！ [打印本页]
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-14 21:51
标题: Ningjie111的作文贴！求狠批！
11.13 独立 这两天实在太忙了。先交一篇。。。队长别把我开除了555555！！！Some people think that a universityprofessor should focus time on doing research; while others think that the mainrole of a professor is to educate students in a university. What is youropinion and why? Use specific reasons to support your answer.

As we all know, professors in universitiesare one of the most popular occupations in United State. The reputation and welfaresometimes means duties too. Some professors fall into a dilemma. Spending timefocus on research? Or making all effort to educate students? To my opinion,latter should be put more emphasis on.

Foremost, in my belief most students chooseto enter a university in order to pursue the knowledge and expertise whichmight be helpful to their future life. University in a way is the last stationbefore they start their career. That is why professors play very importantroles in students study. When I was in my last year of my senior high school, Ihave to decide which university I want to attend for my higher education. Theaspects I focus on are whether they have some excellent professors and whetherthese professors are willing to offer best education to students. It was notonly I but also the majority of students in such situation that make decision basedon the education the professor can provide in university. That is why I deem agood professor should be good at teaching as well.

In addition, a good professor who can teachstudents well is helpful for universities to appeal students. Mostly the initialfund of universities comes from the tuition of students or the donation from alumnus.A survey on the relationship of professor’s teaching quality and the enrollmentof students of the university in my hometown shown that those universitieswhere education is paid more attention on can attract almost twice the numberof applicants of other universities. Besides, when I attend an info session ofa famous university, the dean of the admission committee told me everyprofessor in their school should focus on education. So these evidences mightinfer that the quality of education in a university somehow determines thenumber of students they might enroll as well as the money they might gain fromstudents.

Furthermore, although it will be a significantimprovement in professors’ life span if they have some finds of invention in theirresearch, they must convey the result of research to others so that this wealthof wisdom will be remained from one generation to another. This is also themeaning of professors’ duty of education. Here is an experience of a professorfor instance. He was an expert in language field, but he devoted all his lifeas a professor to his research instead of cultivating students. In his lastmoments he said the thing he regretted most is nobody among his studentscontinued his research. This experience was told by my professor who is a goodteacher in my mind. Obviously, if the professor can make more effort on hisstudents, the research might be extended and more and more linguist will showup.

From the reasons above, we can make aconclusion that. Doing research may bring a lot of benefits to not only the professorbut also the university. However, we cannot deny that education is still the mostprincipal obligation to professors.
作者: Crystal的秋天    时间: 2012-11-15 09:55
As we all know, professors in universities are one of the most popular occupations in United State. The reputation and welfare sometimes 单复数means duties too. Some professors fall into a dilemma. 逗号或者破折号吧Spending timefocus on research? Or making all effort 单复数to educate students? To my opinion,latter should be put more emphasis on.

Foremost, in my belief most students choose to enter a university in order to pursue the knowledge and expertise which might be helpful to their future life. University in a way is the last stationbefore they start their career. That is why professors play very important roles in students study. When I was in my ( the) last year of my senior high school, I have(had) to decide which university I want (would like ）to attend for my higher education. Theaspects I focus on are whether they(it 你只能选一所学校吧) have some excellent professors and whetherthese professors are willing to offer best education to students. It was notonly I but also the majority of students in such situation that make decision basedon the education the professor can provide in university. That is why I deem agood professor should be good at teaching as well.

In addition, a good professor who can teach students well is helpful for universities to appeal students. Mostly the initial fund of universities comes from the tuition of students or the donation from alumnus.A survey on the relationship of professor’s teaching quality and the enrollmentof students of the university in my hometown shown that those universitieswhere education is paid more attention on can attract almost twice the numberof applicants of other universities. Besides, when I attend an info session ofa famous university, the dean of the admission committee told me every professor in their school should focus on education. So these evidences mightinfer that the quality of education in a university somehow determines thenumber of students they might enroll as well as the money they might gain fromstudents.

Furthermore, although it will be a significantimprovement in professors’ life span if they have some finds of invention in theirresearch, they must convey the result of research to others so that this wealthof wisdom will be remained from one generation to another. This is also themeaning of professors’ duty of education. Here is an experience of a professorfor instance. He was an expert in language field, but he devoted all his lifeas a professor to his research instead of cultivating students. In his lastmoments he said the thing he regretted most is nobody among his studentscontinued his research. This experience was told by my professor who is a goodteacher in my mind. Obviously, if the professor can make more effort on hisstudents, the research might be extended and more and more linguist will showup.

From the reasons above, we can make aconclusion that. Doing research may bring a lot of benefits to not only the professorbut also the university. However, we cannot deny that education is still the mostprincipal obligation to professors.



行文很流畅，长短句交错用的很好，除了很细节的问题，我找不出什么问题了。
作者: 晨依Jacqueline    时间: 2012-11-15 10:52
加油！！
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-15 21:45
11.13 综合

In the passage the author argues the three main reasons which cause the decline of yellow cedar in northwestern North America are insect parasites, brown bears and the gradual changes of climate. But obviously, the professor in the lecture cannot agree with these causes. He thinks that these hypotheses may base on some wrong supposition.

To begin with, the author in the passage mentions that the beetles will attack cedar trees and eat the wood. This is why the tree is declining. However, the professor regards this hypothesis as a false since healthy cedars are generally able to insist the attack from the beetle. The cedar can produce a strong toxic chemical liquid which can kill the beetles. So the professor thinks that the author fails to establish the relationship between cedars and beetles.

In addition, although some trees might be clawed by brown beers like what the author predict in the passage, the professor still doubt the reliability of the evidence. Because the yellow cedars grow not only on mainland but also on island, the declination of the trees should not happen on island since there are no brown beers on island. Apparently, the cedars are becoming less and less on the island. So there is no direct connection between brown beers and the declination of yellow cedar unless more evidence would be proved.

At last, the professor considers the assumption that the decreasing number of yellow cedar is related to the gradual change of climate is insufficient. The author suppose that due to the changes in the patterns of seasonal as well as day-to-day temperatures, the roots of cedars start to grow in late winter instead of early spring. The frozen root damage may be the reason why the reduction of cedars. On the contrary, the professor believes that this assumption is still open to doubt. According to the author, the cedar should have to survive at low elevation location where is warm and vice verse. The fact is they are still declining in warm place at low elevation. The author should take more factors into consideration otherwise this assumption cannot be proved.

To sum up, as far as the professor concerned, there is still no reason found that can explain the declination of yellow cedar. The predictions in the passage are proved to be wrong or insufficient.

看我这龟速啊。。。。求crystal大人批改~~
作者: Crystal的秋天    时间: 2012-11-15 22:15
In the passage the author argues the three mainreasons which cause the decline of yellow cedar in northwestern North Americaare insect parasites, brown bears and the gradual changes of climate. Butobviously, the professor in the lecture cannot agree with these causes. Hethinks that these hypotheses may base on some wrong supposition.

To begin with, the author in the passage mentionsthat the beetles will attack cedar trees and eat the wood. This is why the treepopulation is declining.However, the professor regards this hypothesis as a false since healthy cedarsare generally able to resistthe attack from the beetle. The cedar can produce a strong toxicchemical liquid which can kill the beetles. So the professor thinks that theauthor fails to establish the relationship between cedars and beetles.

In addition, although some trees might be clawedby brown beers like what the author predicts in the passage, the professorstill doubts the reliability of the evidence. Because the yellow cedars grownot only on mainland but also on island, the declination of the trees shouldnot happen on island since there are no brown beers on island. Apparently, thecedars are becoming less and less on the island. So there is no directconnection between brown beers and the declination of yellow cedar unless moreevidences  are provided.

At last, the professor considers the assumptionthat the decreasing number of yellow cedar is related to the gradual change ofclimate is insufficient. The author suppose that due to the changes in thepatterns of seasonal as well as day-to-day temperatures, the roots of cedarsstart to grow in late winter instead of early spring. The frozen root damagemay be the reason why the reduction of cedars. On the contrary, the professorbelieves that this assumption is still open to doubt. According to the author,the cedar should have to survive at low elevation location where is warm andvice verse. The fact is they are still declining in warm places at low elevation.The author should take more factors into consideration otherwise thisassumption cannot be proved.

To sum up, as far as the professor concerned, thereis still no reason found that can explain the declination of yellow cedar. Thepredictions in the passage are proved to be wrong or insufficient.


整体没问题，改动的地方很少，注意下下单复数，还有单词的准确性。你听到的信息量真全，敲得字也很多。但是概括性不高，几乎把所有例子都完整的表达了出来，我不知道这样好还是不好？不过能在20分钟内，做到这样，真心不容易，求教啊！
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-16 12:18
我只是拼命打字。。。。基本上是听到什么打什么。。。所以打得多。。。但我觉得还是稍微概括一下比较好，我会注意的！谢谢
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-18 17:35
11.18 独立

Some of my friends complain to me about the increasing competition among students in entering a good university. We have to take a lot of exams, learn knowledge from a wild field and even prepare for language test like TOFEL if you want to study in another country. It seems that people have to work harder to get higher education. However as far as I am concerned, people are now much easier to be educated than in the past.

Initially, recent technology advancement has changed the way people live radically, especially in education. It provides a lot of new source for people to study. For example, the invention of internet helps people to find resource they need all over the world. My mother, a typical housewife, is now studying Japanese online. Her Japanese teacher taught her the pronunciation, grammar, and practical skills of Japanese through internet. It cost less time and money for such people as my mother to study what they want. Those open courses online from some universities which are available to everyone on the website of the university definitely offer opportunities for those who cannot attend these classes to learn. This obviously illustrate people could be educated easily.

Subsequently, the boom in transportation system and the boost in globalization also did a great favor to the education. Nowadays it is not difficult to go abroad for study. It might only cost you 10 hours on flight to across two continents and enter a local school in a totally unfamiliar country. In China, more and more students choose to fly to another developed country and to finish their higher education there. International student can use the resource on campus to improve their study and gain more cross culture experience when they study abroad. In this way students have more chance to get an education all over the world.  

Furthermore, realizing the importance of education, the governments put more emphasis on education and made so much effort that can encourage citizens to pursue an education. In China, the government pays the whole tuition fee which cover 9 years education for children from elementary school to junior high school. Due to such policy, no matter how the financial situation of a family is, their children can get education from school for free. In this situation the governments play important roles on improving the education and make it easier for people to be educated.

Ultimately, although the competition for high education is still intense, with the aid of the invention of high technology, the gradual improvement of transportation and the incentive strategy of government, education is no longer hard to access now compare to the past.
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-19 16:25
11.18 综合
The reading article and the professor in the lecture both talk about the policy of “Let it burn” However they hold different views about this policy. The author asserts that this policy may have three main damages: damage to plants, to animals and to tourist attraction. On the contrary, the professor regard this policy as a proper one for all three aspect.

Foremost, although the big fire might burn a lot of trees and plants in the 1988 forest fire of Yellowstone park as what the author mentioned, the professor assume that this fire still provides opportunities for those plants which cannot survive before. More area is available for them to grow since the big fire burned a lot of old plants. Besides, the seed can grow in a high level spree. According to this hypothesis, the professor think the author only find out the result of the fire and ignore the benefits the plants get from this fire in the future.

Also, the professor supposes that this fire is beneficial not only to plants but also to the wildlife. This cast doubt about the opinion of the author that the wildlife animal in the park was affected seriously in this forest fire. In professor’s belief, without the fact that more and more animals will recover from this fire, this fire can provide more ideal habitat to those small animals such as rabbits and hares. Therefore the predators of them will show up so that the whole wildlife chain will be stronger.

Furthermore, the professor considers the assumption of the author that this fire cause the lost in the tourist attraction and then influence the local economy is not true. According to the professor’s opinion, the fire will not cost so much is it happens every year with enough rainfall and less wind. What’s more, there is no more big fire since 1988. So it is the occasional big fire instead of the policy that influences the tourist attraction as well as the economy at that time and it will get better after the fire. More evidence is needed if the author wants to prove the relationship of the policy and the tourist attraction.

To sum up, the professor still believe the policy “let it burn “is a effective policy and will do good to the both environment and the economy, even though someone else like the author in the passage do not support with this policy.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-19 19:26
亲~独立的批改我10:30上传给你,我的也上传了!
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-19 22:59
Some of my friends complain to me about the increasing competition among students in entering a good university. We have to take a lot of exams, learn knowledge from a wild (这个词用偏了,换wide)field and even prepare for language test like TOFEL if you want to study in another country. It seems that people have to work harder to get higher education. However as far as I am concerned, people are now much easier to be educated than in the past.

Initially（这个词不错）, recent technology advancement has changed the way people live radically, especially in education. It provides a lot of new source for people to study. For example, the invention of internet helps people to find resource they need all over the world(后面这个修饰all over the world感觉修饰不明,是people or needs). My mother, a typical housewife, is now studying Japanese online. Her Japanese teacher taught her the pronunciation, grammar, and practical skills of Japanese through internet. It cost less time and money for such people as my mother to study what they want. Those open courses online from some universities which are available to everyone on the website of the university definitely offer opportunities for those who cannot attend these classes to learn. This obviously illustrate people could be educated easily.

Subsequently, the boom in transportation system and the boost in globalization also did a great favor to the education. Nowadays it is not difficult to go abroad for study. It might only cost you 10 hours on flight to across two continents and enter a local school in a totally unfamiliar country. In China, more and more students choose to fly to another developed country and(直接去掉To ) to finish their higher education there. International student can use the resource on campus to improve their study and gain more cross culture experience when they study abroad. In this way students have more chance to get an education （要加an?）all over the world.

Furthermore, realizing the importance of education, the governments put more emphasis on education and made so much effort that can encourage citizens to pursue an education. In China, the government pays the whole tuition fee which cover 9 years education for children from elementary school to junior high school. Due to such policy, no matter how the financial situation of a family is, their children can get education from school for free. In this situation the governments play important roles on improving the education and make it easier for people to be educated.

Ultimately, although the competition for high education is still intense, with the aid of the invention of high technology, the gradual improvement of transportation and the incentive strategy of government, education is no longer hard to access now compare to the past.

Excellent, 语言很顺畅, 看的出你语言功底不错! 我看完没发现问题~ 整个结构链比较清晰。

求指教：你30分钟怎样可以打出450字的~我纯打字可以打这么多,但还要构思的话就只能写350字了~~~
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-19 23:21
Some of my friends complain to me about the increasing competition among students in entering a good university. We have to take a lot of exams, learn knowledge from a wild (这个词用偏了,换wide)field and even prepare for language test like TOFEL if you want to study in another country. It seems that people have to work harder to get higher education. However as far as I am concerned, people are now much easier to be educated than in the past.

Initially（这个词不错）, recent technology advancement has changed the way people live radically, especially in education. It provides a lot of new source for people to study. For example, the invention of internet helps people to find resource they need all over the world(后面这个修饰all over the world感觉修饰不明,是people or needs). My mother, a typical housewife, is now studying Japanese online. Her Japanese teacher taught her the pronunciation, grammar, and practical skills of Japanese through internet. It cost less time and money for such people as my mother to study what they want. Those open courses online from some universities which are available to everyone on the website of the university definitely offer opportunities for those who cannot attend these classes to learn. This obviously illustrate people could be educated easily.

Subsequently, the boom in transportation system and the boost in globalization also did a great favor to the education. Nowadays it is not difficult to go abroad for study. It might only cost you 10 hours on flight to across two continents and enter a local school in a totally unfamiliar country. In China, more and more students choose to fly to another developed country and(直接去掉To ) to finish their higher education there. International student can use the resource on campus to improve their study and gain more cross culture experience when they study abroad. In this way students have more chance to get an education （要加an?）all over the world.

Furthermore, realizing the importance of education, the governments put more emphasis on education and made so much effort that can encourage citizens to pursue an education. In China, the government pays the whole tuition fee which cover 9 years education for children from elementary school to junior high school. Due to such policy, no matter how the financial situation of a family is, their children can get education from school for free. In this situation the governments play important roles on improving the education and make it easier for people to be educated.

Ultimately, although the competition for high education is still intense, with the aid of the invention of high technology, the gradual improvement of transportation and the incentive strategy of government, education is no longer hard to access now compare to the past.

Excellent, 语言很顺畅, 看的出你语言功底不错! 我看完没发现问题~ 整个结构链比较清晰。

求指教：你30分钟怎样可以打出450字的~我纯打字可以打这么多,但还要构思的话就只能写350字了~~~
-- by 会员 lizchang1990 (2012/11/19 22:59:46)



谢谢Liz，get an education是我查出来的官方用法哦。还有关于打字，我打出450个字是的秘诀就只有拼命打，我是边打边构思的。想不到例子的地方立马跳，打第二段。然后再补充。不过，这篇文章打完之后又修改。所以其实现场写的话没那么好。
作者: 浅吟天    时间: 2012-11-20 19:53
抱歉 我完全忘了还有18日的综合要改了。看到你改我的才想起来
我改的特认真~~嘿嘿
黄色 好的，绿色 建议，红色 有问题的

The reading article and the professor in the lecture both talk about the policy of “Let it burn” (加句号)However they hold different views about this policy. The author asserts that this policy may have three main damages: damage to plants, to animals and to tourist attraction. On the contrary, the professor regard（单数） this policy as a proper one for all three aspect（复数）.

Foremost, although the big fire might burn a lot of trees and plants in the 1988 forest fire of Yellowstone （the big fire burn …in fire重复了，改成although the big fire in Yellowstone park might burn a lot of trees and plants）park as what the author mentioned(为啥你前面都是一般时，这里是过去时呢), the professor assume（单数） that this fire still provides opportunities for those plants which cannot survive before. More area（areas are） is available for them to grow since the big fire burned a lot of old plants. Besides, the seed can grow in a high level spree（啥？）. According to this hypothesis, the professor think（单数） the author only find（单数） out the result of the fire and ignore（单） the benefits the plants get from this fire in the future.

Also, the professor supposes that this fire is beneficial not only to plants but also to the wildlife. This cast (单)doubt about the opinion of the author that the wildlife animal in the park was affected seriously in this forest fire. In professor’s belief, without the fact that more and more animals will recover from this fire, this fire can provide（这个逻辑有点问题啊，我不知道你要表达什么） more ideal habitat（复数） to those small animals such as rabbits and hares(厉害，我没听出来). Therefore the predators of them will show up so that the whole wildlife chain will be stronger.

Furthermore, the professor considers the assumption of the author that this fire cause（单） the lost(loss才是名词，一定要注意啊，我也经常忘！！！) in the tourist attraction and then influence（单） the local economy is not true. According to the professor’s opinion, the fire will not cost so much is（两个复数了我又不知道这句话在表达什么了） it happens every year with enough rainfall and less wind. What’s more, there is no more big fire（more是修饰可数名词的，我发现你more后面都是单数，我也有点怀疑自己了） since 1988. So it is the occasional big fire instead of the policy that influences the tourist attraction as well as the economy at that time and it will get better after the fire. More evidence is needed if the author wants to prove the relationship of the policy and the tourist attraction.（这句叫兽有说吗，没有的话还是不要加的好哈）

To sum up, the professor still believe（单）加个that the policy “let it burn “is a(an) effective policy and will do good to the both environment and the economy, even though someone else like the author in the passage do not support with this policy.

亲，其他的我们都不说了，把单复数加上好吗？！这个真的很重要。。
2，时态
点子都到了 字数也很好！加油
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-20 23:42
抱歉 我完全忘了还有18日的综合要改了。看到你改我的才想起来
我改的特认真~~嘿嘿
黄色 好的，绿色 建议，红色 有问题的

The reading article and the professor in the lecture both talk about the policy of “Let it burn” (加句号)However they hold different views about this policy. The author asserts that this policy may have three main damages: damage to plants, to animals and to tourist attraction. On the contrary, the professor regard（单数） this policy as a proper one for all three aspect（复数）.

Foremost, although the big fire might burn a lot of trees and plants in the 1988 forest fire of Yellowstone （the big fire burn …in fire重复了，改成although the big fire in Yellowstone park might burn a lot of trees and plants）park as what the author mentioned(为啥你前面都是一般时，这里是过去时呢), the professor assume（单数） that this fire still provides opportunities for those plants which cannot survive before. More area（areas are） is available for them to grow since the big fire burned a lot of old plants. Besides, the seed can grow in a high level spree（啥？）. According to this hypothesis, the professor think（单数） the author only find（单数） out the result of the fire and ignore（单） the benefits the plants get from this fire in the future.

Also, the professor supposes that this fire is beneficial not only to plants but also to the wildlife. This cast (单)doubt about the opinion of the author that the wildlife animal in the park was affected seriously in this forest fire. In professor’s belief, without the fact that more and more animals will recover from this fire, this fire can provide（这个逻辑有点问题啊，我不知道你要表达什么） more ideal habitat（复数） to those small animals such as rabbits and hares(厉害，我没听出来). Therefore the predators of them will show up so that the whole wildlife chain will be stronger.

Furthermore, the professor considers the assumption of the author that this fire cause（单） the lost(loss才是名词，一定要注意啊，我也经常忘！！！) in the tourist attraction and then influence（单） the local economy is not true. According to the professor’s opinion, the fire will not cost so much is（两个复数了我又不知道这句话在表达什么了） it happens every year with enough rainfall and less wind. What’s more, there is no more big fire（more是修饰可数名词的，我发现你more后面都是单数，我也有点怀疑自己了） since 1988. So it is the occasional big fire instead of the policy that influences the tourist attraction as well as the economy at that time and it will get better after the fire. More evidence is needed if the author wants to prove the relationship of the policy and the tourist attraction.（这句叫兽有说吗，没有的话还是不要加的好哈）

To sum up, the professor still believe（单）加个that the policy “let it burn “is a(an) effective policy and will do good to the both environment and the economy, even though someone else like the author in the passage do not support with this policy.

亲，其他的我们都不说了，把单复数加上好吗？！这个真的很重要。。
2，时态
点子都到了 字数也很好！加油
-- by 会员 浅吟天 (2012/11/20 19:53:24)



啊啊啊。。。这就是拼命打字赶出来的后果！下次我一定要注意单复数和时态。。。谢谢吟天小主！
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-21 01:18
11.19 迟来的作文啊！！！！
It is more important to choose friends that have fun with than to choose friends that will help you when you need them

Friend plays a very crucial role in our life span. Sometimes we may fall in a dilemma that choose a friend with fun or choose a friend who can help you a lot. As far as I am concerned, both two types of the friends should be consider as good friend.

Foremost, a friend in need is a friend in deed. Although it is an old and dull saying we all familiar with, we still admit that it tells a truth. Nobody wants to struggle for their life along. We all need friend to be our assistant, teacher and touch. So those friends who can help us, guide us and rectify us are becoming important part of our relationship. Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels are good friends and both of them are talented persons. When Marx is in his poorest time, Engels supported him not only in finance but also in their career. They always get together and share their idea about some problems. Once Marx wanted to write a press release for the publisher but unfortunately he didn’t know English. Then Engels aided him and translated what he write in English. In my belief, Marx would not have such influential achievement without the help of Engels.

However, we always face a lot of obstacles in our life. At that moment, we usually turn to those friends who have a lot of related experience or wisdom to look for some advises. It seems other interesting friends can do nothing for you. Notwithstanding that they might not be able to provide you some advises, they can still release you from high pressure from the difficulties. You cannot deny that those crack jokes make you laugh and enable you to forget the problem for a while.

Once I experience the most upset period in my life, I failed in my university entrance exam and it means I have to say goodbye to the school I have longed to. Lots of my friends come to visit me. Some of them are older than me and provide me a lot of suggestion. I was thankful to those suggestions and believe that I can overcome this struggle. But still I am not happy until one of my friends who always bring laugh to other came to visit me. She brought me her joke, her encouragement and hope to me. That was the first time I smelled after she told me about her terrible but funny experience. I felt much better after that time. Now she is still a fantastic happy girl and also my best friend.

From the assumption and example above, we can easily conclude that everyone needs friend and no matter those friend are helpful or funny, they all contribute to your life.
作者: zhisheng2200    时间: 2012-11-23 11:31
我21号的发了 我没看到你21号的独立啊？？？
你19号也是该我改吧？？？



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