ChaseDream

标题: 11.7 独立写作,求拍砖,谢谢亲们~ [打印本页]

作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-7 19:02
标题: 11.7 独立写作,求拍砖,谢谢亲们~
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The way of a person’s dress is an indication of his or her personality or character.





It is a truth universally acknowledged that we are used to cover themselves with clothes since we evolved from apes. There is a heated topic that whether our dresses can reveal our personalities or characters. From my perspective, it’s hard to say that our dresses can be an indication of our nature. My opinion can be supported by several reasons as following.



As we know, people in different cultural background always have different preferences about dress, we cannot know about a person only by his/her clothes, so it is unwarranted to state that one person’s dress is the reflection of his/her character. Nowadays, advances in media technology have great impact on the way people’s views about dress and fashion. Maybe it is the media hype that influence people’s dress style rather than their own personalities do. For example, in 2005, Super Girl was popular, and almost everyone watched such TV show. Because of its popularity, many young people started to follow their idol by wearing the identical style dress. Since then, hundreds of thousands of ladies in Chinese loved to dress themselves like a handsome boy or worn big black glasses. We can see how the fashion show changes people’s personal aesthetic view. Therefore, people’s dresses are not just out of their nature, outside elements sometimes have more important influence.



In addition, one person’s position also brings uncorrected evaluation about one’s personality or character. People in different level positions always have their particular styles. That’s why you can distinguish a boss from his/her employees quickly. But they will not just limit their roles in one position. Maybe in their daily life, they are not serious as they are in the highly position. If we evaluate their personalities hastily, maybe we will get a false result.



Different occasions may determine one’s dress as well in stead of one person’s own preference. Taking various parties as examples, in a formal raising fund party, man should wear tie and suit, woman should wear formal dress. However, in a family party or festival party, people can wear whatever they want, because such an occasion is informal and for fun. From this point, we may understand that people’s dresses are not necessarily the true indication of people’s own characters.



In such a society with multiple characteristics, we should know a person from a variety of aspects. Dress is no longer the pure factor for us to evaluate one’s personality and character. Only when we get more information about one person can we get a correct answer.

作者: amissrosa    时间: 2012-11-8 18:46
11.7日的作文題目是 College or University should have a better job preparation for students before they find jobs,樓主寫的是6號的題目,不過還是幫你改囉! 有錯的地方還請樓主見諒>"< 一起加油!!
11.6 獨立改


[1]It is a truth universallyacknowledged that we [2]have been are used to cover themselves (ourselves) with clothessince we evolved from apes. There is a heated (hot) topic thatwhether our dresses can reveal our personalities or characters. From myperspective, it’s hard to say that our dresses can be an indication of ournature. My opinion can be supported by several reasons as following.
[1]词组 It is universallyacknowledged that

[2] 句型S. +have p.p.,since S.+ Ved
As we know, people in (with) differentcultural background always have different(distinct/dissimilar) preferences about dress, . We cannot know about a person only by his/her clothes, so because it isunwarranted to state that (regard) one person’sdress (as) is the reflectionof his/her character. Nowadays, advances in media technology have great impacts on [1]the way people’s viewsabout dress and fashion. [2]Maybe it is themedia hype that influence [3]people’s dress style rather than their own personalities do. For example,in 2005, Super Girl was popular, and almost everyone watched such (this) TV show. Because ofits popularity, many young people started to follow [4]their idol (it) by wearing theidentical style dress. Sincethen, hundreds of thousands of ladies in Chinese (Chineseladies) loved to dress themselves like a handsome boys or worn bigblack glasses. We can see how the fashion show changes people’s personalaesthetic view. Therefore, people’s dresses are not just out of their nature,outside elements sometimes have more important influence (playan more important role).
[
1] have greatimpacts on the way that people +动词 (ex. judge/ comment)
[2]建议可改成Because of the hype ofmedia, 可是句与句之间的关系更清楚
[
3]A rather thanB, AB为平行结构:people dress inpopular style rather than in personal style

[4]因前面无提到任何idols,突然跑出idol有点突兀
[5]总觉得该段的论点(people withdifferent cultural background always have different preferences about dress)和例子(media impact ondressing style)没有相扣,楼主可考虑换此段论点,或例子
In addition, one person’s position also brings uncorrected evaluationabout one’s(the other one’s) personality orcharacter. People in different level positions always have their particularstyles. That’s why you can distinguish a boss from his/her employees quickly.But they will not just limit their roles in one position(转折的很好!). Maybe intheir daily life, they are not serious as they are in the [1]highly formal position. If weevaluate their personalities hastily, maybe we will get a false result.
[1]我懂楼主想表达的意思,但查过google后发现英文好像没有”highly position”的说法,所以建议用formal position


Moreover, Differentoccasions may determine one’s dress as well instead of one person’s own preference.Takeing various parties as examples, in a formal raising fund party (fundraising party), a man should wear tie and suit, woman should wear formal dress. However,in a family party or festivalparty (family or festival party), people can wear whatever theywant, because such an occasions is are informal and for fun. From this point, we may understand that people’sdresses are not the necessarily the true indication of people’s own characters.



In such a society with multiple characteristics, we should know a personfrom a variety of aspects. Dress is no longer the pure (only) factor for us toevaluate one’s personality and character. Only when we get more informationabout one person can we get a correct answer.


文章中evaluate出现的次数频繁,可以多用其他同义字取代~
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-8 19:03
谢谢rose,thanks, 一起加油.
作者: amissrosa    时间: 2012-11-8 20:26
您好~不客氣!大家一起互相幫忙!
再麻煩你批改我的作文喔!感激不盡
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-8 21:56
标题: 11.7作业
11.7 独立

College or University should have a better job preparation for students before they find jobs





As we know, nowadays our country has changed dramatically from citizen’s daily life to the development of our technology. All these changes also lead to a more competitive labor market. People need to equip themselves with more abundant preparations to obtain an edge. So, from my perspective, college or university should have a better job preparation for students before they get jobs.


More preparations can horn students’ qualities and help them get satisfied jobs. Now, many universities have started to provide a large number of various useful sources to students, such as vocation-oriented training and professional speeches about strategies of finding a job. Such practical knowledge is very important for students in the future real-world work environment. Only when students have acquainted with these problems and acquire some indirect experiences from senior professors can they perform better in their fields. As a result, it will be an undeniable fact that students can find jobs easily.


More preparations also can help a college or university gain good reputation, then school can enroll more excellent students next year, therefore college should have a better job-centered education for students. I believe that everybody wants to attend an institute with higher reputation. People always try to improve themselves from different aspects in order to obtain an admission of a good university. If a college can attract hundreds of thousands of students from different places by good reputation, then it will have more excellent alumnus, so maybe these people will donate more money to help the college development in the near future. This is a virtue recycle. From this point, a better jib preparation is a bonus for both students and school.


Taking these reasons as I mentioned above into consideration. No matter a preparation from the short-term factor for students’ career or from the long-term factor for a college’s future bloom. We may safely state that job education is necessary for students, and an institution should provide such a curriculum for students to train them. When all students find their pleased positions and work hard, our society will have a more tremendous change and people will have better life.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-8 21:57
11.7 作业TPO23 综合


The speaker distracted these three hypotheses in the reading passage about why yellow cedar has been declining for a long time. He pointed out the inaccuracies in each of explanation as following.


Regarding the first cause, the lecture said that it was impossible for beetle to lead to the decline of yellow cedar. Because the health trees could resist the insect parasites by themselves. In addition, the bark of the tree was poisonous, so if the beetle ate the outer layer of yellow cedar, they would die. Therefore, such a cause from beetle or insect parasites was fairly unwarranted.


The professor in the listening material also argued against the reason brown bears were responsible for the decline. He demonstrated that many yellow cedars grew in the island of North America
. There weren't any bears in that island. So the cause from brown bears was highly doubt.

What's more, the speaker rejected the third hypothesis that gradual changes of climate should blame. He explained that many tree also died in the lower elevation areas where was warmer. Generally speaking, the climate in the high elevation was colder and low elevation was warmer. So the frost would only bring damages to trees in higher level rather than in a lower level. Many yellow cedars grew in low elevation, therefore the frozen climate would not kill the trees.
作者: 小滋滋    时间: 2012-11-10 16:42
等待11.9综合
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-10 18:48
11.9 独立  spending money on travel &vacation vs. saving for future

Many people are familiar with the film Titanic, there is a scene that when the ship was sloping and sinking, a fat woman was regretting that she hadn’t eaten up the chocolate cake on the table in that morning because of worrying about high calorie would make her shape worse. Actually myriad facets tell us that an acknowledged adage “life is short, please seize the day”. So, I consider that spending money on travel is more essential for us to enjoy the short and beautiful life than saving capitals for future.

For one thing, travel itself can benefit us a lot, such as broadening our horizons and relieving our mental pressures. These advantages are huge bonus for a colorful life because in today’s fierce competitive labor markets, versatile characteristics are extremely important for our future success. Better yet, vacation can help us obtain such qualities and acquire extra experiences to horn our skills. Therefore saving money we just get a record of bank account but nothing.

For another thing, spending cashes on holiday can boost a country’s economy. I believe this is also the reason why many banks have introduced credit cards for citizens. If everyone only saves their salary into a bank or other places, people are not willing to spend them, how does our cash flow in the whole world? How does our economy prosper with frozen capitals? When people are taking their trips, they will spend money on souvenirs, board and lodging and transportation, this series of consumption can bring profits to local residents and improve their material life .From this point, I tend to believe that spending money on travel is a crucial and indispensable for the development of local tourism and the economy of our country.

Finally, vacation is the keystone for people to communicate, especially for international cultures to blend. Such a significant activity, we should try our best to uphold and delicate to it. For instance, every year, there will be hundreds of thousands of foreign friends come to China, they want to experience the special and long Chinese culture. Only when they truly enjoy such an interacted cultural journey can they spread our characteristic traditions to the whole world. Then more people will know about China and come to our lands.

Facing these convincing reasons above, we may admittedly state that spending money is better than saving it because taking a trip can contribute to not only individuals but also our society. Such multiple advantages are enough to push us go to other places and have a good time. So, why not have a journey and feast your limited life soon?
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-10 18:49
TPO25 综合作文
The lecture and the reading passage held opposite opinions toward whether the ancient vessels that found in Iraq could prove ancient people use electric batteries. However, the professor illustrated that the equipment was applied as ancient electric batteries.

The reading mentioned that if such vessels were used as batteries, there would be some metal wires near the vessels. The speaker contradicted this point by saying that these devices were found by local residents not archaeologist, maybe inhabitants had used the original equipment but the archaeologist overlooked.

In addition, regarding the second argument the reading materials claimed, that the copper cylinders inside the jars looked like those copper tools in Seleucia and had the same use, was also rejected by the lecturer. He demonstrated that no evidence was provided that the shape of original scrolls, the same shape was not necessary for the identical purpose. What’s more, when copper was mixed with iron, they usually produced electricity. The original copper used for one purpose, while adapted copper for another purpose. Therefore, we can see how groundless the reading’s reason.

Finally, the professor rebutted the statement that the reading clarified, he explained that small electricity could produce wild short when we touch it. That’s why many ancient people said they had magic power when using batteries. Because modern doctors use electricity to heal legs and pains and stimulate muscles, maybe ancient doctors also use it for the same purpose.
作者: amissrosa    时间: 2012-11-11 15:01
11.9 獨立改 抱歉來晚了>_<
红色错误 橘色建议 黄色精彩
Many people arefamiliar with the film, Titanic, and there is a scene that when theship was sloping(slop专指液体晃荡) and sinking, a fat woman was regretting that she hadn’t(didn’t) eaten up the chocolate cake on the table in that morning because of worrying abouthigh calorie would make her shape worse. Actually, myriadfacets tell us that an acknowledged adage “life is short, please seize theday”. So, I consider thatspending money on travel is more essential for us to enjoy the short andbeautiful life than saving capitals for future.

For one thing,travel itself can benefit us a lot, such as broadening our horizons andrelieving our mental pressures. These advantages are huge bonus for a colorfullife because in today’s fierce competitive labor markets, versatilecharacteristics are extremely important for our future success. Better yet,vacation can help us obtain such qualities and acquire extra experiences to horn (earn?) our skills (若再举例会更精彩). Therefore(however语意会较顺畅), saving money we just get a record of bank account but nothing by saving money.

For another thing, spending cashes on holiday canboost a country’s economy(很新颖的论点!). I believe this is also thereason why many banks have introduced credit cards for citizens. If everyoneonly saves their salary into a bank (banks) or other places, people are not willing tospend them(删掉后感觉比较简洁有力), how does our cash flow in thewhole world? How does our economy prosper with frozen capitals? When people are taking theirtrips, they will spend money on souvenirs, boardand lodging andtransportation,. this (These) seriesof consumption can bring profits to local residents and improve their materiallife(非常有说服力).From this point, I tend tobelieve that spending money on travel is a crucial and indispensable for thedevelopment of local tourism and the economy of our country.

Finally, vacationis the keystone for people to communicate, especially for international cultures toblend (experiencing/exchanging foreign cultures). Such asignificant activity, we should try our best to uphold and delicate (?) to it. For instance, every year, therewill be hundreds of thousands of foreign friends (foreigners) come to China, and they want to experience the special and long (historic) Chinese culture. Only when they truly enjoy such an interacted culturaljourney can they spread our characteristic traditions to the whole world. Thenmore people will know about China and come to our lands (country).



Facing theseconvincing reasons above, we may admittedly state that spending money ontraveling is better than saving itfor future becausetaking a trip can contribute to not only individuals but also our society. Such multiple advantages are enough to push us to go to other places and have a good time. So, why not have a journey andfeast in your (our) limited life soon?
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-12 19:22
11.11号独立  It is more important to choose friends that have fun with than to choose friends that will help you when you need them. Please use specific details and examples to support your opinion.

There is a well known story about three visits to thatch. When Liubei was suffering from the military problems, Zhuge liang helped him in emergency and insisted him in establishing Shu. Like Liubei in this story, I prefer to choose a friend that can give me a hand when I’m in troubles.

Admittedly, having fun with others is a significant goal for pursuing in our limited life. We can forget about a variety of bothers and unpleasant things. Of course, we will be happier in such a relaxed situation and keep a good mood for a while. But having a companion who only have fun with you is enough? Will your friendship last for a long time? I may don’t think so. If your partner often finds lots of excuses to reject help you, what will you think? You must be angry and disappointed. Therefore, this fun-centered relationship is not a wise choice for selecting a friend.

As a saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed. Timely help from a company is really important to enhance friendships. I believe that we always hope our friends do us a favor rather than turning around and walking away, because we know that time-tested friendship is more essential for us to cherish. For example, Bill Gates and Paul, even thought the latter is not famous and successful as the former, Paul gives Bill huge supports on the development of software. They face those depressing days together and deal with myriad technological problems day and night. Their pure friendship teaches us a lot about what thing is most crucial to people’s relationship.

Friend who can share joys and sorrows can benefit not only individuals but also the solidity of our whole society. When people get well along with each other and always help the counterparts, our society will be full of love and become more harmonious, as a result, the whole group will make progresses. For instance, Chenguang Biao, a famous philanthropist in China. He is the very person who often gives a timely hand to his friends. To him, all people in China are his friends, and he is willing to offer aids to individuals who are in troubles. While Sichuan was suffering the big earthquake in 2008, he donated numerous necessary equipments and provided emergent funds to save those dying lives. On one hand, he helped them out of the tough situations. On the other hand, he also made a great positive influence to hundreds of thousands of people in China. From this point, we can see misery-tested friends are extremely vital to our society.

Taking all these reasons as I mentioned above, we know that the friend who only shares happy moments is not enough to solid our pure friendships, we need a person who can help us in the hour of needs. Then we can obtain an enduring relationship with him or her.
作者: lmylacoste    时间: 2012-11-12 22:24
There is a well known story about three visits to thatch. When Liubei was suffering from the military problems, Zhuge liang helped him in emergency and insisted him in establishing Shu. Like Liubei in this story, I prefer to choose a friend that can give me a hand when I’m in troubles(好像没有s的,固定词组).

Admittedly, having fun with others is a significant goal for pursuing in our limited life. We can forget about a variety of bothers and unpleasant things. Of course, we will be happier in such a relaxed situation and keep a good mood for a while.
But having a companion who only have fun with you is enough?(陈述句语序的疑问句好像不怎么见诶?求讨论!) Will your friendship last for a long time? I may(貌似多余) don’t think so. If your partner often finds lots of excuses to rejectto help you, what will you think? You must be angry and disappointed. Therefore, thisfun-centered relationship is not a wise choice for selecting a friend.

As a saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed. Timely help from a company is really important to enhance friendships. I believe that we always hope our friends do us a favor rather than turning around and walking away, because we know that time-tested friendship is more essential for us to cherish. For example, Bill Gates and Paul, even thought
àthough the latter is not famous and successful as the former, Paul gives Bill huge supports on the development of software. They face我觉得undergo会比较好,而且应该是过去式哦) those depressing days together and deal with过去式哦) myriad technological problems day and night. Their pure friendship teaches us a lot about what thing is most crucial to people’s relationship.

Friend
s who can share joys and sorrows can benefit not only individuals but also the solidity of our whole society. When people get well along with each other and always help the counterparts, our society will be full of love and become more harmonious, as a result(缺了连词), the whole group will make progresses. For instance, Chenguang Biao, a famous philanthropist in China.(不是完整的句子呀) He is the very person who often gives a timely hand to his friends. To him, all people in China are his friends, and he is willing to offer aids to individuals who are in troubles. While Sichuan was suffering the big earthquake in 2008, he donated numerous necessary equipments and provided emergent funds to save those dying lives. On one hand, he helped them out of the tough situations. On the other hand, he also made a great positive influence to hundreds of thousands of people in China. From this point, we can see misery-tested friends are extremely vital to our society.

Taking all these reasons as I mentioned above, we know that the friend who only shares happy moments is not enough to solid
àsolidify our pure friendships, (缺了连词)we need a person who can help us in the hour of needs. Then we can obtain an enduring relationship with him or her.





Excellent! Fluent and elegant words, various and diverse vocabulary and complete and profound paragraphs.

A few minor errors worth being noticed

作者: 蝴蝶渡海    时间: 2012-11-12 23:43
There is awell known story about three visits(visitors)to thatch.Once upon a time When Liubei was suffering from the militaryproblems, Zhuge liang helped him in emergency and insisted him inonestablishing Shu. Like Liubei in this story, I prefer to choose a friend thatcan give me a hand when I’m in troublestrouble.

Admittedly, having fun with others is asignificant goal for pursuing in our limited life. We can forget about a variety ofbothers and unpleasant things. Of course, we will be happier in such a relaxedsituation and keep a good mood for a while. But having a companion who onlyhave fun with you is enough? Will your friendship last for a long time? I maydon’t think so. If your partner often finds lots of excuses to reject help you,what will you think? You must be angry and disappointed. Therefore, this fun-centered(这个词好,我一直想不出来怎么表达) relationship is not a wise choice for selecting a friend.


As a saying goes, a friend in need is a friendindeed. Timely help from a company is really important to enhance friendships.I believe that we always hope our friends do us a favor rather than turningaround and walking away, because we know that time-tested friendship is moreessential for us to cherish. For example, Bill Gates and Paul, even thoughtthough the latter is not famous and successful as theformer, Paul gives Bill huge supports on the development of software. They facethose depressing days together and deal with myriad technological problems dayand night. Their pure friendship teaches us a lot about what thing is mostcrucial to people’s relationship.


Friend who can share joys and sorrows can benefitnot only individuals but also the solidity of our whole society. When peopleget well along with each other and always help the counterparts(这个词用的不太恰当,是想表达全部的整体的意思么?), our society will be full of love and becomemore harmonious, as a result,(此处缺连词了,as a result无法做连词) the whole group will make progresses. For instance, Chenguang Biao, a famousphilanthropist in China(这个句子缺成分了). He is the very person who often gives a timely hand tohis friends. To him, all people in China are his friends, and he is willing tooffer aids to individuals who are in troubles. While Sichuan was suffering thebig earthquake in 2008, he donated numerous necessary equipments and providedemergent funds to save those dying lives. On one hand, he helped them out ofthe tough situations. On the other hand, he also made a great positiveinfluence to hundreds of thousands of people in China. From this point, we cansee misery-tested(不懂是什么意思) friends are extremely vital to our society.
感觉这段有点偏题了,第一句主旨表达的是有可以相互分享快乐忧愁的朋友不仅可以使个人得倒好处还是整个社会更加稳定和谐了,这与你想论证的无直接关系,看不出你是想表达more important与哪一点了,而后面的例子还是仅表明需要那种能帮护你的人。

Taking all these reasons as I mentioned above, weknow that the friend who only shares happy moments is not enough to solid ourpure friendships, we need a person who can help us in the hour of needs. Thenwe can obtain an enduring relationship with him or her.


整体文章的结构和成分都是不错的,但是我对于你的所使用的观点有些疑问,我的感觉此篇文章题目中的moreimportant是个关键点。Have fun with和helpin need并不是矛盾的。而是我们更倾向于那种,虽然可以明显看出你的观点倾向于help in need但是论证的不是充分,能帮助你的就是真正地朋友么?只有帮主而没有fun也行么?
有什么不同意的欢迎讨论。。时间有点晚了,也可能我的思路略不清晰带来理解上的偏差
作者: amissrosa    时间: 2012-11-13 00:52
LIZ 我明天再改妳的11.11的綜合喔><
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-13 18:25
TPO24 综合

The reading passage and the lecture held different perspective toward the study of dinosaur's blood tissues. The lecturer pointed out several reasons to contradict the arguments in the reading.

Regarding the first claim in the passage, that small branching channels inside the leg bone could be the presence of blood vessels, was rejected by the speaker. He illustrated that this was not necessarily the case because such substance was like something else. In fact, when the animal died, bacterial would eat the hollow and live inside the bone. Then the bacteria would leave some substance inside the bone. So, the evidence provided by the passage is inadequent to prove the argument.

In addition, the professor also doubted the statement in the reading materials that the presence of spheres could be the remains of red blood cells. He said that the location where the fossils were found appeared some other animals which hadn't blood vessels, including primary dinosaur. So it may be other animal's organic substance was left there rather than T.rex.

Finally, the reading demonstrated that collagen was exactly an association with bone tissue. But the lecturer thrown cast on this point. He explained that researchers had never found a collagen was older than the one before. Scientists didn't know whether the dinosaur's tissue would last for so longer. Concerning such reason, it is too problematic. What's more, such collagen may come from the skin of T. rex. Since people's skin have collagen, which perhaps from skins of dinosaur's bone instead of tissue.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-13 18:25
11月12日
独立 Patience is usually not a good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.

During our limited life, there are a lot of decisions we should make from individual to economy and then to the whole society. So, what is a good strategy for us to establish when we face a variety of issues in our daily life? Keeping patience or taking action soon, which one is better? In my view, the later can benefit us a lot in such a fast changing society.

Admittedly, those who are patient can always consider a issue from all kinds of aspects and obtain a more compelling result, but this strategy is suitable for today’s working environment? I don’t think so. Nowadays, people who are working in many industries must keep themselves faster; otherwise they will not gain any edge toward position promotion. Boss will only select decisive and shrewd workers, they believe those people can make more profits for his or her company. Therefore, we can see that keeping patient may be an obstacle on the way of pursuing a future success for one person.

On the other hand, taking action is also the fittest way to make money in the fierce market. We know that the development of our technology has advanced so much. Facing such a tough situation, successful individuals must equip themselves with some necessary qualities, such as decisive thoughts and timely actions. For example, Jiuzhi Tang, which is a famous country-chain pharmaceutical industry, took fast action in 2010 to buy a large amount of raw materials when they noticed the fluctuating price. The purchasers didn’t wait for a month or several months to make a decision. On the contrary, they did timely purchasing and helped the industry obtain the advantages of price and achieve further success quickly. If they were hesitate at that time, maybe we will see another struggling picture about Jiuzhi Tnag.

Taking action merely bring benefit to one person alone? The answer is negative. Rapid reaction sometimes can boost the development of the whole society and improve people’s material life. Taking Shenzhen as an example, several decades ago, it is a small poor fish village. The only way for residents to make a living depended on fishery. In 1978, China had a policy to develop some areas where were in eastern part of China. Then the government in Shenzhen used such a good opportunity to make a huge progress. Now, we have known that taking action at that time was wise and challenging, but it turns out that speedy action was worth.

Taking all these reason as I mentioned above, we should be firmly convinced that taking action is better for us to walk farther in our career than keeping patient. Next time, do not hesitate to wait for an opportunity, you do need to take timely action quickly. Maybe we will see your blossom in the near future.
作者: 小滋滋    时间: 2012-11-13 18:58
The lecture and the reading passage held opposite opinions toward whether the ancient vessels that found in Iraq could prove ancient people use electric batteries. However, the professor illustrated that the equipment was applied as ancient electric batteries.

The reading mentioned that if such vessels were used as batteries, there would be some metal wires near the vessels. The speaker contradicted this point by saying that these devices were
found(这个词用的不太准确,听力是想强调mw对于farmer的价值没有archaeologist大,所以throw away了,建议再仔细听下)
by local residents not archaeologist, maybe inhabitants had used the original equipment but the archaeologist overlooked.

In addition, regarding the second argument the reading materials claimed, that the copper cylinders inside the jars looked like those copper tools in Seleucia and had the same use, was also rejected by the lecturer. He demonstrated that no evidence
evidence被证明哈?)was providedproved that the shape of original scrolls, the same shape was not necessary for the identical purpose.(是想写个同位语嘛?同位语要用双逗号隔开)
What’s more, when copper was mixed with iron, they usually produced electricity. The original copper used for one purpose, while adapted copper for another purpose. Therefore, we can see how groundless the reading’s reason.

Finally, the professor rebutted the statement that the reading clarified, he explained that small electricity could produce wild short when we touch it. That’s
the reason
why many ancient people said they had magic power when using batteries. Because modern doctors use electricity to heal legs and pains and stimulate muscles, maybe ancient doctors also use it for the same purpose.



感觉第二段写的有点绕,建议长短句结合,然后可以加个结尾,第三点感觉我听的和你不太一样,都回去好好听听吧。
楼主实在不好意思,我今天才发现我那天改的作文被我发到自己帖子上面去了(最近有点小忙没上网),实在是对不起啦,5555555


作者: 正儿八经潜水    时间: 2012-11-13 20:29
标题: 11.12.独立 修改
During our limited life, there are a lot of decisions we should make,from individual to economy and then to the whole society.(from...指的是decision,decision不可以用individual...来表示,而且个人、经济、社会的递进不太精确,换个说法,不要用递进) So, what is a good strategywhat strategy is good for us to establish when we face a variety of issues in our daily life? Keeping patience or taking action soon, which one is better? In my view, the later can benefit us a lot in such a fast changing society.

Admittedly, those who are patient can always consider a issue from all kinds of aspects and obtain a more compelling(不知你是不是要表示引人注目,换个词吧,比如完善的)result, but this strategy is suitable for today’s working environment? I don’t think so. Nowadays, people who are working in many industries must keep themselves faster; otherwise they will not gain any edge toward position promotion. Boss will only select decisive and shrewd workers, they believe those people can make more profits for his or her company. Therefore, we can see that keeping patient may be an obstacle on the way of pursuing a future success for one person.第一句不能这么说,因为要更后面的例子形成对比,要表达出有耐心的人多虑,犹豫不决,反而导致事情不能更快更好地完成,得不到老板青睐)


On the other hand, taking action is also the fittest way to make money in the fierce market. We know that the development of our technology has advanced so much. Facing such a tough situation, successful individuals must equip themselves with some necessary qualities, such as decisive thoughts and timely actions. For example, Jiuzhi Tang, which is a famous country-chain pharmaceutical industry, took fast action in 2010 to buy a large amount of raw materials when they noticed the fluctuating price. The purchasers didn’t wait for a month or several months to make a decision. On the contrary, they did timely purchasing and helped the industry obtain the advantages of price and achieve further success quickly. If they were hesitate at that time, maybe we will(对现在的假设,虚拟用wouldsee another struggling picture about Jiuzhi Tnag.

Taking action merely bring benefit to one person alone? The answer is negative. Rapid reaction sometimes can boost the development of the whole society and improve people’s material life. Taking Shenzhen as an example, several decades ago, it iswasa small poor fish village. The only way for residents to make a living depended on fishery. In 1978, China had a policy to develop some areas where were in eastern part of China. Then the government in Shenzhen used such a good opportunity to make a huge progress. Now, we have known that taking action at that time was wise and challenging, but it turns out that speedy action was worth.(这个例子似乎有些跑偏,从哪里可以看出国家是及时决策的呢,事实是国家也没有及时啊,解放后那么多年才改革开放)

Taking all these reason as I mentioned above, we should be firmly convinced that taking action is better for us to walk farther in our career than keeping patient. Next time, do not hesitate to wait for an opportunity, you do need to take timely action quickly. Maybe we will see your blossom in the near future.(总结时要概括三个论点)

作者: AnthonySummer    时间: 2012-11-13 22:09
TPO24 综合

The reading passage and the lecture held a different (要麼不加a,但是perspectives)perspective toward the study of dinosaur's blood tissues. The lecturer pointed out several reasons to contradict the arguments in the reading.

Regarding the first claim in the passage, that small branching channels inside the leg bone could be the presence of blood vessels, was rejected by the speaker. He illustrated that this was not necessarily (缺少連詞,這)the case because such substance was like something else. In fact, when the animal died, bacterial would eat the hollow (不是eat hollow,空的怎麼吃啊妹子你真幽默,是bacteria remain形成的) and live inside the bone. Then the bacteria would leave some substance inside the bone. (和聽力講的不是很精確,妹子重新聽一下吧)So, the evidence provided by the passage is inadequate to prove the argument.

In addition, the professor also doubted the statement in the reading materials that the presence of spheres could be the remains of red blood cells. He said that the location where the fossils were found appeared some other animals which(did not have,你這時態不能用啊,用一般過去式,表示一出生就沒有的) hadn't blood vessels, including primary dinosaur. So it may be other animal's organic substance was left there rather than T.rex. (我記得是礦石的原因~)

Finally, the reading demonstrated that collagen was exactly an association with bone tissue. But the lecturer threw cast on this point. He explained that researchers had never found a collagen was older than the one before. (1000years, 聽到的話就寫出來,加分!)Scientists didn't know whether the dinosaur's tissue would last for so longer. Concerning such reason, it is too problematic. What's more, such collagen may come from the skin of T. rex. Since people's skin have collagen, which perhaps from skins of dinosaur's bone instead of tissue.

(多抓住細節哦!,加油吧!)
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-13 23:08
谢谢Anthony&正儿八经.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-14 18:41
11.13  TPO  23 综合writing

The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite perspective toward the factors that cause the decline of yellow cedar. The professor illustrates that the several hypotheses in the article are fairly unwarranted for three reasons.

To begin with, the reading mentions that insect parasites bring damage to yellow cedar and cause trees' decline. However, the speaker points out this inaccuracy by saying that health yellow cedar can resist the insect parasites by themselves. In addition, bark and leaves of trees can release powerful chemical poison; it's impossible this insect is a candidate for the reason. In fact, the attacked trees are already ill or dead. Therefore, the first hypothesis is rejected completely.

Regarding the second argument the reading passage claims, that brown bears are responsible for the decline, is also rebutted as nonsense by the lecturer. He demonstrates that decline appears in both cold mainland and island. But there are no bears in island. So such reason toward bears is highly doubted.

Finally, the professor contradicts the statement in the article that gradual changes of climate may be to blame. He explains that many trees die in lower elevation, which is warmer for plants to grow. We can see more yellow cedar die in lower elevation than trees in higher regions. So, the blame to climate is uncorrected because roots are not sensitive to warmer weather.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-14 18:42
11月13日
独立 Some people think university professors should spend more time doing research while others think they should spend more time educating students. What is your view?
综合:TPO23


When it comes to the topic that professors should take more time to do research or to educate students, people always hold different perspectives on it. Some uphold the former, while others prefer the latter. In my view, teachers in university should spend more time doing research.

First of all, only when professors themselves make clear the academic knowledge by doing researches can they teach their students well. As a saying goes, practice makes perfect. It means that people need to acquire skills or theories from real working environment. Nowadays, advances in technology have changed so fast, the change of one discipline may impact another relevant science and lead to the past knowledge in textbooks outdated. Then we are in want of more scholars engaging in experiments to provide the update knowledge. So professors can exploit their abilities to solve these problems quickly by doing researches. When teachers are familiar with such a field, their students can make huge contributions to this academic area.

In addition, prestigious researches can help a university obtain a good reputation; maybe the college will enroll more excellent students in the near future. Admittedly, most of us would like to pursue a further study in a well-known program. So, what should we do often? Generally speaking, we will search the rank of a university from US News. Such a rank is partly based on the dedication of scholars in a school. Therefore, if professors take more time to study a profound field in laboratories, and they can do it successfully, the result from experiments is not only a breakthrough of a project but also a high acknowledgement to both professors and a university. This is a virtuous cycle; it can bring much benefit to the recruit and huge potential success to a college.

Finally, doing researches can boost the development of social science, improving people’s spiritual and material life. As we know, many daily things in our life are invented by myriad experiments. From electricity to bulb, from black television to LCD television and from telephone to Internet, we can see our life has been changed so much. It is scholars’ efforts that we can have such a better and comfortable modern life. If professors in college merely educate their students about textbooks, it is hard for me to imagine what our life will be.

Taking all these factors as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that professors need to delicate more time on researches rather than only teaching students in campus because researches can benefit not only professors themselves but also our society and whole academic field.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-14 18:42
辛苦批改的同学~thanks so much !
作者: bonnenuit    时间: 2012-11-14 20:59
The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite perspective toward the factors that cause the decline of yellow cedar. The professor illustrates that the several hypotheses in the article are fairly unwarranted for three reasons.

To begin with, the reading mentions that insect parasites bring damage to yellow cedar and cause trees' decline. However, the speaker points out this(this很少做代词,改that it is) inaccuracy by saying that health yellow cedar can resist the insect parasites by themselves. In addition, bark and leaves of trees can release powerful chemical poison; it's impossible this insect is a candidate for the reason. In fact, the attacked trees are already ill or dead. Therefore, the first hypothesis is rejected completely.

Regarding the second argument the reading passage claims,(去掉逗号) that brown bears are responsible for the decline, is also rebutted as nonsense by the lecturer. He demonstrates that decline appears in both cold mainland and island. But there are no bears in island. So(so 没有therefore,hence,来得正是) such reason toward bears is highly doubted.

Finally, the professor contradicts the statement in the article that gradual changes of climate may be to blame. He explains that many trees die in lower elevation, which is warmer for plants to grow. We can see more yellow cedar die in lower elevation than trees in higher regions. So, the blame to climate is uncorrected because roots are not sensitive to warmer weather.
作者: lmylacoste    时间: 2012-11-14 21:50
When it comes to the topic that professors should take more time to do research or to educate students, people always hold different perspectives on it. Some uphold the former, while others prefer the latter. In my view, teachers in university should spend more time doing research.

First of all, only when professors themselves make clear the academic knowledge by doing researches can they teach their students well. As a saying goes, practice makes perfect. It means that people need to acquire skills or theories from real working environment. Nowadays,
advances(“axioms” would be more suitable to be blended in the sentence) in technology have changed so fast, the change of one discipline may impact another relevant science and lead to the past knowledge in textbooks (to be) outdated. Then we are in want of more scholars engaging in experiments to provide the update(updated) knowledge. So professors can exploit(not concise I thinkàtake advantage of) their abilities to solve these problems quickly by doing researches. When teachers are familiar with such a field, their students can make huge contributions to this academic area.

In addition, prestigious researches can help a university obtain a good reputation; maybe the college will enroll more excellent students in the near future. Admittedly, most of us would like to pursue a further study in a well-known program. So, what should we do often? Generally speaking, we will search the rank of a university from US News. Such a rank is partly based on the dedication of scholars in a school. Therefore, if professors take more time to study a profound field in laboratories, and they can do it successfully, the result from experiments is not only a breakthrough of a project but also a high acknowledgement to both professors and a university. This is a virtuous cycle; it can bring much benefit to the recruit and huge potential success to a college.

Finally, doing researches can boost the development of social science, improving people’s spiritual and material life. As we know, many daily things in our life are invented by myriad experiments. From electricity to bulb, from black television to LCD television and from telephone to Internet, we can see our life has been changed so much. It is scholars’ efforts that we can have such a better and comfortable modern life. If professors in college merely educate their students about textbooks, it is hard for me to imagine what our life will be.

Taking all these factors as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that professors need to delicate more time on researches rather than only teaching students in campus because researches can benefit not only professors themselves but also our society and whole academic field.



Excellent

Elegant language, rich content and delicate structure!

Only with very little minors

Good

作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-15 18:16
11月14日
独立 Contributes on an enjoyable vacation, please select one of three selection. Good food, good location and with good friends to travel.

In such a stressful and fast-paced society, many of people tend to have a trip to release their mental pressure. But what is the top priority element for us to consider when we select the contributions on an enjoyable travel? Good food? Good location or good friends? From my perspective, good friends take weighs over the formers.

Admittedly, good food and good location are indispensable and vital factors for an enjoyable journey. Local characteristic food can help us know local special diet; good location will bring us a delighted mood to experience regional culture and to see the beautiful scenery. But these extrinsic elements are not enough to ensure a satisfied vacation; we care more about intrinsic joy. For example, when we encounter problems in a trip like losing a wallet or catching a cold; can you still have a strong appetite for the food or keep a good emotion to enjoy the charming views? I don’t think so. We usually will be upset and feel disappointed about this travel. If we have good friends accompany us in this time, maybe the situation will be different. They can help us to solve such unpleasant problems and make our journey more colorful. Friends always are huge bonuses for us when we are in trouble and contribute to our travel.

In addition, good friends can augment our joy in a tour, this intangible asset which we cannot gain from good food or good location is an extra award for us to remember this vacation in the rest of our life. Taking my own experience as an example, last year I had a tour from New York to Las Vegas. My sense of direction was bad, especially when I was in a completely strange country. The crowed and dirty buildings in Chinatown made me uncomfortable; the worse weather had destroyed my strong desire to visit outside the hotel. All in all, I was totally irritable and depressed. I didn’t know why I was so sensitive about such annoying things. At that time, my friend Laura talked with me and tried her best to make me happy. After one-hour mood curing, things didn’t seem worse. Thanks for Laura, I could adjust my negative mood quickly and eventually enjoy my travel.

Taking all these reasons above, I firmly believe that good friends can contribute more to a vacation than other factors. Since they can not only help us out of dejected situations easily but also enlarge our satisfaction about our journey. So next time when you want to visit another places, why not ask a good friend accompany you?

谢谢批改的童鞋~~
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-15 20:34
TPO22 综合,谢谢批改同学!

The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward the topic whether the ethanol is a good replacement for gasoline. The speaker illustrates that ethanol is a better alternative for three reasons.

First of all, the professor contradicts the argument in the article that ethanol can’t solve the biggest environmental problems: global warming. He illustrates that ethanol is often made of plants like corns. Growing plants can absorb the carbon dioxide in air as their nutrition. Actually, the corns can remove CO2 from the atmosphere. So, the reason provided in the reading is not convincing.

Regarding the second statement in the passage, more than 60 percentages of corns have to be used for 10 percentages of fuel needs and animals haven’t enough food, the lecturer points out the inaccuracy of the reason. He explains that ethanol is produced by the cellutrice, which is a kind of cell walls and is an inedible part of trees. Therefore, by using this part to produce ethanol has nothing with the available food for animals and cannot endanger their life.

Finally, the speaker demonstrates the explanation that ethanol fuel will never be able to compete with gasoline on price as nonsense by stating that tax subsidies from a government are necessary. In fact, if the productions of ethanol increase, the marginal cost will drop, then the price of ethanol will decline. Meanwhile, the professor says that if the yields are 3 times greater than they are now, the cost of ethanol will drop 40 percentages.
作者: AnthonySummer    时间: 2012-11-15 21:39
11月14日独立 Contributes on an enjoyable vacation, please select one of three selection. Good food, good location and with good friends to travel.


In such (啰嗦,建議刪掉) a stressful and fast-paced society, many of people tend to have a trip to release their mental pressure. But what is the top priority element for us to consider when we select the contributions on an enjoyable travel? Good food? Good location or good friends? From my perspective, good friends take the weight over the formers (複數).


Admittedly, a good food and a good location are indispensable and vital factors for an enjoyable journey. Local characteristic (traditional) food can help us know the local special diet; good location will bring us a delighted mood to experience regional culture and to see the beautiful scenery. But these extrinsic elements are not enough to ensure a satisfactory (satisfied 是被滿意的)savacation; we care more about the intrinsic joy. For example, when we encounter problems in a trip like (語病) losing a wallet or catching a cold(這句很唐突,最好要前後過渡一下); can you still have a strong appetite for the food or keep a good emotion to enjoy the charming views? I don’t think so. We usually will be upset and feel disappointed about this travel. If we have good friends to accompany (你原來兩個謂語了)us in this time, maybe the situation will be different. They can help us to solve such unpleasant problems and make our journey more colorful. Friends always are huge bonuses for us when we are(刪掉) in trouble and contribute (語病,主語指代不清) to our travel.


In addition, good friends can augment our joy in a tour, (not convince用在這不好) this intangible asset which we cannot gain from good food or good location is an extra award for us to remember this vacation in the rest of our life. Taking my own experience as an example, last year I had a tour from New York to Las Vegas. My sense of direction was bad, especially when I was in a completely strange country. The crowed and dirty buildings in Chinatown made me uncomfortable; the worse weather had destroyed my strong desire to visit outside the hotel. All in all, I was totally irritable and depressed. I didn’t know why I was so sensitive about such annoying things. At that time, my friend Laura talked with(to) me and tried her best to make me happy. After one-hour mood curing, things didn’t seem worse. Thanks for Laura, I could adjust my negative mood quickly and eventually enjoy my travel. (最後列子感覺一筆帶過,可以多寫些)


Taking all these reasons above, I firmly believe that good friends can contribute more to a vacation than other factors. Since they cannot only help us out of dejected situations easily but also enlarge our satisfaction about our journey. So next time when you want to visit another places, why not ask a good friend accompanies you?
感覺句式用法比較簡單,用詞不夠豐富,有些語法錯誤。貴在結構清晰,簡單易懂。加油吧!
谢谢批改的童鞋~~
作者: pennywu20    时间: 2012-11-15 21:57
Thereading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward the topic whetherthe ethanol is a good replacement for gasoline. The speaker illustrates thatethanol is a better alternative for three reasons.

First of all, the professor contradicts the argument in the article thatethanol can’t solve the biggest environmental problems: global warming(用定语从句会不会好些呢?之前看过的冒号后一般接句子~拙见). He illustrates that ethanol is often made of plants like(最好用such as,考过G的同学懂得~)corns.Growing plants can absorb the carbon dioxide in air as their nutrition. Actually,the corns(plants更好?) can remove CO2 from the atmosphere. So, the reason provided in thereading is not convincing.

Regarding the second statement in the passage, more than 60 percentages ofcorns have to be used for 10 percentages of fuel needs and animals haven’tenough food, the lecturer points out the inaccuracy of the reason. He explainsthat ethanol is produced by the cellutrice(介个我当时也没听懂是啥植物), which is a kind of cell walls andis an inedible part of trees. Therefore, by using this part(再修饰一下part?) to produce ethanolhas nothing with the available food for animals and cannot endanger their life.(nothing to do with, 最后一句觉得最好修改一下表达的可能更准确些~)

Finally, the speaker demonstrates the explanation that ethanol fuel will neverbe able to compete with gasoline on price as nonsense by stating that taxsubsidies from a government are necessary. (意思好像和lecture里的不同?)In fact, if the productions ofethanol increase, the marginal cost will drop, then the price of ethanol willdecline. Meanwhile(这个衔接的好~), the professor says that if the yields are 3 times(觉得欠妥?直接three times?) greaterthan they are now, the cost of ethanol will drop 40 percentages.



除了third point第一句有点问题,看下来表达什么的还是不错~比较喜欢。差点改迟了?多多包涵


作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-15 23:23
呵呵,不迟,谢谢  penny 哦!   O(∩_∩)O哈哈~
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-17 19:08
11月15日
独立 Agree or disagree: your job has greater happiness han your social life.

Happiness is an ultimate goal that many people have been pursuing in our short life. But what kind of elements contribute to it most is a hot debated topic. Between extrinsic and intrinsic factors, which one weighs over the other is controversial. From my perspective, one person’s job can bring more greater happiness that one’s social life.

Admittedly, job is not an extremely vital step toward happiness. However, it is an indispensable and necessary part of happiness. Most of our limited time is spend on jobs. The huge influence of work has impacted our social life so much. According to a national survey, individuals almost take more than two-thirds of time on working. Their primary social activities are conducted with co-workers, in another words, they are tightly tied with colleagues in a company. From the research, we can see people’s life is firmly connected with the environment regarding their positions. Therefore, job is the true platform for us to enhance interpersonal relationship and acquire happiness.

Job can elevate the sense of happiness by obtaining a well-paid job in an institution, including. I believe that many of us want to have a peaceful and comfortable life, but this goal is a thorny issue to achieve. Generally speaking, money is the best therapy for this pain. What can we do to make money? Job! Only when we have a job and work well can we gain ideal salary, which can ensure a better material life. After we solve these basic needs in our life, we can pursue more profound aim such as pure spiritual life which is the foundation of happiness.

One more thing I would like to mention is that happiness from the whole society can be doubled. If one person can do some outstanding job to contribute to our society, residents will respect and appreciate him or her for a long time. These intangible assets are really important to bring happiness to us. For example, Chenguangbiao, a famous philanthropist in China, always donates goods and other materials to the poor or people who are in trouble. To him, the promising and delighted life of most of us is most essential factor to his happiness. His selflessness moved us so much; inhabitants in a large number of cities in China praise his charity. As he said once, he was the happiest man in the world because he could share joys and sorrows with the whole society.

Given these reasons I demonstrated above, I fairly believe that job can bring greater happiness for individuals than any other elements. To make your life more colorful and meaningful, next time why not to do some jobs which can benefit a group of people? I strongly hold that the significant work can create greater happiness.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-17 19:09
TPO  21 综合写作

The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward whether the genetically modified trees are better than the unmodified ones or not. The professor illustrates that modified plants do not bring a number of benefits as we thought.

First of all, the article mentions that genetically modified trees are more likely to survive than their unmodified counterparts. However, the speaker casts doubts on this view. She demonstrates that there are at least a few ones among ordinary trees can resist severe conditions such as virus or pests, but modified trees are genetically uniform, so if these trees catch a mortal virus, they will completely wipe out. Therefore, the above perspective is totally rebutted.

In addition, regarding the second argument in the reading, that modified plants can bring a number of economic benefits to those who grow them, is also rejected as nonsense by the lecturer. She claims that scientists have tested these seeds for a long time, so farmer will pay much more to buy modified seeds, it’s impossible for them to save money. What’s more, although people plant modified trees for free, we still need to pay it by law.

Finally, the professor contradicts the statement in the reading that genetically modified trees can satisfy the demand for wood. She explains that the modified plants usually grow more aggressive than the ordinary ones. Hence they are out competing for natural resources such as water, sunshine and other nutrition.  They also crowd among unmodified trees lead to negative impact to ordinary ones.  Now, we can see this opinion in the article is fairly doubted.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-17 19:09
11.16  作业TPO 20 综合写作

The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward whether or not the "let it burn" policy should be replaced by a policy of extinguishing forest fires as soon as they appeared. He professor illustrates that wild fire can benefit the forest instead of damaging.

First of all, the article mentions that Yellowstone fires caused tremendous damage to the park's trees and other vegetation. However, the speaker rebuts this view as nonsense by saying that vegetation, after 1980s, has more opportunities to grow in the open space. There are more new plants appear in the forest and seeds of certain plants which can undergo high level heat can germinate in Yellowstone Park. Therefore, the perspective that fires endanger vegetation is fairly unwarranted.

In addition, regarding the second argument the reading claims, that wildlife was affected as well, is rejected by the lecturer. She demonstrates that wild fire can create new chances to animals. For example, small plants can reappear after fires because once they haven't a opportunity to catch sunshine. Meanwhile, burned land can be a ideal habitat for small animals such as rabbit and hens. Then, other predators who eat these small ones can survive and become stronger than they are before. So, the second argument is also incorrect.

Finally, the professor contradicts the statement in the reading that the park will be less attractive to tourists due to the wasteland. She explained that Yellow Park encountered the worst weather in 1988. There were no rainfalls and the wind was strong, hence the fire was beyond controlling. In fact, after 1980s, no other severe dry weather appeared and more tourists came to Yellow park result in the booming of local economy.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-17 19:10
11月16日
独立 Agree or disagree:it is important to be completely honest with your friends.


Friends are best therapy when we encounter troubles and feel depressed. I believe most of us cherish precious friendship with others, but how to get well along with them is a thorny issue. From my perspective, incomplete honesty can contribute more to the special relationship than complete honesty to our friends.

Although honesty is a good characteristic for us to choose partners because we hold that honest people are more reliable, excessive honesty can actually jeopardize our long-term friendship. For example, you are overwhelmed by a large amount of work and try your best to finish it, but you still do a bad job. What do you want your friend do? Of course nobody expects our friends blame us our low efficiency or scold us as a stupid person. At that time, we need our friends to comfort and encourage us instead of blaming. Even though we know we are not an excellent person, we still don’t want to hear the honest words. Therefore, it is impossible for us to sustain the relationship with others who always tell the truth due to this behavior will endanger our friendship.

One more profound contribution that incomplete honesty makes is that telling a lie to a friend sometimes can create a more harmonious society. Admittedly, it is undeniable that lie is hated by most of individuals. Our parents always told us that one should be honest when we were young. But, the premise is that this conception is only limited on ethical matters, things that beyond the limits are still acceptable. Taking a famous historical event as an example, in 1936, China was suffering from huge war disaster from both outside and inside the country. At that time, Jiangjieshi was attempting to attack liberation army in Nanjing. When Zhangzuolin, an intimate military friend of Jiang, heard this news, he exaggerated the military preparation of liberation army on purpose, so Jiang considered incorrectly that he himself couldn’t win this battle and decided to give up attacking. Hence, many innocent local residents avoided a destroyed war. We cannot imagine what would happen if Zhang told the truth totally.

Given the depth analysis as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that we cannot keep honest to our friend all the time. Sometimes a few white lies to good friends can benefit not only us ourselves but also the whole society.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-17 19:10
对于批改的同学先说声thanks !
作者: bonnenuit    时间: 2012-11-17 19:59
The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward whether the genetically modified trees are better than the unmodified ones or not. The professor illustrates that modified plants do not bring a number of benefits as we thought.

First of all, the article mentions that genetically modified trees are more likely to survive than their unmodified counterparts. However, the speaker casts doubts on this view. She demonstrates that there are at least a few ones among ordinary trees can resist severe conditions such as virus or pests, but modified trees are genetically uniform, so if these trees catch a mortal virus, they will completely wipe out. Therefore, the above perspective is totally rebutted.

In addition, regarding the second argument in the reading,(去掉逗号) that modified plants can bring a number of economic benefits to those who grow them(them最近的是benefits,这样就造成指代问题了), is also rejected as nonsense by the lecturer. She claims that scientists have tested these seeds for a long time, so farmer will pay much more to buy modified seeds, it’s impossible for them to save money. What’s more, although people plant modified trees for free, we still need to pay it by law(我听到的是即使农民收获了种子,但他们仍不能随便种,要按照法律支付给company费用,跟你这个有点小出入).

Finally, the professor contradicts the statement in the reading that genetically modified trees can satisfy the demand for wood. She explains that the modified plants usually grow more aggressively than the ordinary ones do. Hence they(这个还原,否则就不清楚是modified ones 还是ordinary ones) are out competing for natural resources such as water, sunshine and other nutrition.  They also crowd among unmodified trees lead to negative impact to ordinary ones.  Now, we can see this opinion in the article is fairly doubted.

除了有些指代还有点混乱,其他的基本没神马问题了
作者: lmylacoste    时间: 2012-11-18 09:29
Friends are best therapy when we encounter troubles and feel depressed. I believe most of us cherish precious friendship with others, but how to get well along with them is a thorny issue. From my perspective, incomplete honesty can contribute more to the special relationship than complete honesty to our friends.

Although honesty is a good characteristic for us to choose partners because we hold that honest people are more reliable, excessive honesty can actually jeopardize our long-term friendship. For example, you are overwhelmed by a large amount of work and try your best to finish it, but you still do a bad job. What do you want your friend do? Of course nobody expects our friends blame us our low efficiency or scold us as a stupid person. At that time, we need our friends to comfort and encourage us instead of blaming. Even though we know we are not an excellent person, we still don’t want to hear the honest words. Therefore, it is impossible for us to sustain the relationship with others who always tell the truth due to this behavior will endanger our friendship.

One more profound contribution that incomplete honesty makes is that telling a lie to a friend sometimes can create a more harmonious society. Admittedly, it is undeniable that lie is hated by most of individuals. Our parents always told us that one should be honest when we were young. But, the premise is that this conception is only limited on ethical matters, (
缺连词)things that beyond the limits are still acceptable. Taking a famous historical event as an example, in 1936, China was suffering from huge war disaster from both outside and inside the country. At that time, Jiangjieshi was attempting to attack liberation army in Nanjing. When Zhangzuolin, an intimate military friend of Jiang, heard this news, (缺连词)he exaggerated the military preparation of liberation army on purpose, so Jiang considered incorrectly that he himself couldn’t win this battle and decided to give up attacking. Hence, many innocent local residents avoided a destroyed war. We cannot imagine what would happen if Zhang told the truth totally.

Given the depth analysis as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that we cannot keep honest to our friend all the time. Sometimes a few white lies to good friends can benefit not only us ourselves but also the whole society.



It is a joy to read your article.I learn a lot from the lines

The near perfect argument will be better if you notice the two errors and the length is a little bit longer.

作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-18 18:53
11.17  TPO 19 综合写作
The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward whether buzzing should be banned or not. The lecturer illustrates that buzzers can benefit people instead of causing negative influence for three reasons.

First of all, the article mentions that buzzers may well give a person incorrect information about the buzzed product. However, the speaker rebuts this point by saying that company always hires those who have used the product and consider them are good. Therefore, these people can tell consumers the truth rather than misleading consumers.

In addition, regarding the second argument the reading claims, that individuals listen to buzzers' endorsements less critically than they should, is also rejected by the lecturer. He demonstrates that consumers usually will ask a lot of questions about the products, such as price, service and how to use the cell phone. If an organization sells bad products, people will not buy them. Hence, the perspective in the passage is fairly unwarranted.

Finally, the man contradicts the statement as nonsense in the reading that buzzing is likely to have harmful effect on social relationships. He explains that if a company sells bad products, it will not have adequate capital to recruit buzzers. And corporations usually recruit persons who know well about their products. When consumers trust their products, people will gain a good experience and tend to trust other people easily. So we can see the view above is casted doubts as well.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-18 18:54
11月17日
独立 在家工作好还是去公司工作好?

The physical manifestations of technological changes surround us, affecting almost everything we do. The way we work, the way work is conducted, the way efficiencies- all of these things have changed over the past thirty years or so. But which way will you choose? Doing working at home or in company? From my perspective, accomplishing tasks in office is preferable.

Although it will be more comfortable and you don’t need to get up earlier to catch a crowded bus or subway by working at home, corporation is a more ideal place to complete your schedule. In an institution, you can meet all colleagues who can give you a timely hand when you are in trouble. In the end, such kind of cooperation can contribute a group more. For example, Bill Gate’s good friend Pual, who always insisted Bill in addressing thorny procedure processing issues and provided a myriad of novel ideas to help Microsoft reorganize. It is their intimated communication in an office that Microsoft can reach its big success as we see now.

In addition, working in a company can increase one person’s opportunity of position promotion. As we know, only when those who are hard working and work efficiently can be promoted. However, at home our efforts can not be seen by the managers. On the contrary, there is a wide room for them to imagine what we do, they may think we are lazy and want to escape burden of work. The only way that we can change their views is to work under their eyes. As a saying goes, seeing is believing. Generally speaking, our boss will consider more about those who are diligent and time-contributed when he or she intends to promote an individual.

More important, working in an organization can boost communication, promote team work, improve interpersonal relationships and increase efficiencies, which are vital ingredients for a harmonious enterprise. For example, Sony, an excellent and successful global chain corporation, often changes and embellishes its working environment to attract more employees to work in the organization, it turns out that this strategy works well. A large number of staffs go to the office to finish their daily tasks. As a result, Sony can win the advantages of human resources which can benefit a great progress for a company. Thanks to workers attend in the office; Sony obtains millions of billions of profits every year.

Given these reasons as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that working with other people in an institution can bring many benefits to both individuals and an enterprise. Hence, if you expect to achieve a more successful career goal, why not join others with your colleagues and work together?
作者: Crystal的秋天    时间: 2012-11-18 19:21
The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions toward whether buzzing should be banned or not. The lecturer illustrates that buzzers can benefit people instead of causing negative influence for three reasons.

First of all, the article mentions that buzzers may well give a person incorrect information about the buzzed product. However, the speaker rebuts this point by saying that company always hires those who have used the product and consider them are(不需要) good. Therefore, these people can tell consumers the truth rather than misleading consumers.

In addition, regarding the second argument the reading claims, that individuals listen to buzzers' endorsements less critically than they should, is also rejected by the lecturer. He demonstrates that consumers usually will ask a lot of questions about the products, such as price, service and how to use the cell phone(信息不准确,应该是他用了多久). If an organization sells bad products, people will not buy them. 跟前面的没有逻辑联系Hence, the perspective in the passage is fairly unwarranted.

Finally, the man contradicts the statement as nonsense in the reading that buzzing is likely to have harmful effect on social relationships. He explains that if a company sells bad products, it will not have adequate capital to recruit buzzers. And 应该用转折而不是并列 corporations usually recruit persons who know well about their products. When consumers trust their products, people will gain a good experience and tend to trust other people easily. So we can see the view above is casted doubts as well.

能够写出阅读和听力的对应关系,但是对听力中的信息表达有的还不够准确,尤其细节部分,讲的很含糊。
作者: lmylacoste    时间: 2012-11-18 22:29
The physical manifestations of technological changes surround us, affecting almost everything we do. The way we work, the way work is conducted, the way efficiencies- all of these things have changed over the past thirty years or so. But which way will you choose? Doing working at home or in company? From my perspective, accomplishing tasks in office is preferable.

Although it will be more comfortable and you don’t need to get up earlier to catch a crowded bus or subway by working at home, corporation is a more ideal place to complete your schedule. In an institution, you can meet all colleagues who can give you a timely hand when you are in trouble. In the end, such kind of cooperation can contribute a group more. For example, Bill Gate’s good friend Pual, who always insisted Bill in addressing thorny procedure processing issues and provided a myriad of novel ideas to help Microsoft reorganize. It is their
intimated(intimate本身就是adj) communication in an office that Microsoft can reach its big success as we see now.

In addition, working in a company can increase one person’s opportunity of position promotion. As we know, only when those who are hard working and work efficiently can be promoted. However, at home our efforts cannot be seen by the managers. On the contrary,
there is a wide room(有此搭配吗?给个出处吧)for them to imagine what we do, they may think we are lazy and want to escape burden of work. The only way that we can change their views is to work under their eyes. As a saying goes, seeing is believing. Generally speaking, our boss will consider more about those who are diligent and time-contributed(好像有点高级,字典没有,求告知) when he or she intends to promote an individual.

More important, working in an organization can boost communication, promote team work, improve interpersonal relationships and increase efficiencies, which are vital ingredients for a harmonious enterprise. For example, Sony, an excellent and successful global chain corporation
Sony是我最喜欢的公司,称之为连锁店似有不妥~, often changes and embellishes its working environment to attract more employees to work in the organization, it turns out that this strategy works well. A large number of staffs go to the office to finish their daily tasks. As a result, Sony can win the advantages of human resources which can benefit a great progress(好像搭配的不那么好achieve虽然简单,但是更适合~for a company. Thanks to workers attendàattending in the office; Sony obtains millions of billions of profits every year.

Given these reasons as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that working with other people in an institution can bring many benefits to both individuals and an enterprise. Hence, if you expect to achieve a more successful career goal, why not join others with your colleagues and work together?(
值得借鉴的结尾)



Excellentyour articles force me to find the synonym of “good”…

Only a miner error (it is likely I misunderstood the syntax, you can check it)

Several unverified phrase wait to be examinedVery Good

作者: SophieS123    时间: 2012-11-19 12:39
1月15日
独立 Agree or disagree: your job has greater happiness han your social life.

Happiness is an ultimate goal that many people have been pursuing in our short life(是不是应该用lives?). But what kind of elements contribute to it most is a hot debated topic. Between extrinsic and intrinsic factors, which one weighs over the other is controversial. (感觉这两句一个意思,合成一句是不是更好一些)From my perspective, one person’s job can bring more(删去more) greater happiness that one’s social life.

Admittedly, job is not an extremely vital step toward happiness. However, it is an indispensable and necessary part of happiness. Most of our limited time is spend on jobs. The huge influence of work has impacted our social life so much. According to a national survey, individuals almost take more than two-thirds of time on working. Their primary social activities are conducted with co-workers, in another words, they are tightly tied with colleagues in a company. From the research, we can see people’s life is firmly connected with the environment regarding their positions. (总觉得这句话可以写得再展开一些)Therefore, job is the true platform for us to enhance interpersonal relationship and acquire happiness.

Job can elevate the sense of happiness by obtaining a well-paid job in an institution, including. I believe that many of us want to have a peaceful and comfortable life, but this goal is a thorny issue to achieve. Generally speaking, money is the best therapy for this pain. What can we do to make money? Job! (这个是不是太直白了一点啊……)Only when we have a job and work well can we gain ideal salary, which can ensure a better material life. After we solve these basic needs in our life, we can pursue more profound aim such as pure spiritual life which is the foundation of happiness.

One more thing I would like to mention is that happiness from the whole society can be doubled. If one person can do some outstanding job to contribute to our society, residents will respect and appreciate him or her for a long time. These intangible assets are really important to bring happiness to us. For example, Chenguangbiao, a famous philanthropist in China, always donates goods and other materials to the poor or people who are in trouble. To him, the promising and delighted life of most of us is most essential factor(两个most稍微有一点点别扭) to his happiness. His selflessness moved us so much; inhabitants in a large number of cities in China praise his charity. As he said once, he was the happiest man in the world because he could share joys and sorrows with the whole society.(例子不错)

Given these reasons I demonstrated(这是证明的意思吧……) above, I fairly believe that job can bring greater happiness for(to) individuals than any other elements. To make your life more colorful and meaningful, next time why not to do some jobs which can benefit a group of people? I strongly hold that the significant work can create greater happiness.
总体感觉不错,观点很鲜明,用词也不错,但是有的地方论述不够深入
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-19 18:47
TPO20, 11.18综合
The article and the lecture hold opposite perspectives toward the policy "let it burn", the speaker asserts that forest wild is a necessary cycle for natural forest.

First of all, the reading passage mentions that Yellowstone fires caused tremendous damage to the park's trees and other vegetation. However, the professor rebuts this point by saying that scorched trees can be replaced by new plants. Meanwhile, the fires can also create opportunities for other vegetation to grow. For example, some certain small plants which cannot grow under the shadow of trees will appear in the open area. Another example is that some seeds will germinate because they need a very high level heat to expose.

In addition, regarding the second argument in the reading, wildlife was affected as well, is rejected as nonsense by the lecturer. He demonstrates that wildfires can create new ideal habitat for some small animals such as rabbit and heal. When these animals start to thrive, other big animals that prey them will be stronger.

Finally, the speaker contradicts the statement in the reading that the value of the park as a tourist attraction will be decline. He explains that the situation in 1988 was very unusual. For instance, no rain falls, unusual strong winds and accumulation of dry undergrowth(求解这词啥意思,我貌似听出来的,感觉是说落叶), which contribute that unexpected disaster. But this situation hasn't occurred since 1988. In fact, many tourists begin to visit Yellowstone after that year and the number of tourists has been increasing.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-19 18:47
11月18日
独立 Do you agree with the viewpoint that people are now easier to become educated than in the past?

Education is a goal that people have been pursuing for a long time. Since the ancient times, people have started to achieve this aim because education can benefit individuals from both intrinsic satisfaction and extrinsic material improvement. But people now or in the past are educated is still a debated issue. From my perspective, we are now are better educated.

Although in the ancient time, it is easier for people to learn some basic skills due to easier and not complex work; many surveys have proved that people now are smarter than those several centuries ago. According to an international social research from 23 countries in 2011, individuals now are more agile and quick apply the knowledge which they learned than they are before as the advanced technology has contributed us so much. In the past, people only rely on paper books and follow what the teachers say, so the channels for them to study are limited; nowadays, mass media provide more information about what’s going on in the world and timely current issues, broadening their horizons excessively and accessing to good education easily.

In addition, a variety of policies now in many nations also facilitate residents to obtain more superior quality education, hence people become more educated. For example, China has conducted a free compulsory education system, which offers a large number of favorable policies for us to attend schools. It is the free and attractive legislation that individuals have a good opportunity to go to schools. However, in the past, many of us cannot afford the fundamental fees for eating and living, let alone the extra money for education. Therefore, it is impossible for citizens to gain higher education and being educated well in the ancient times.

Given these convincing analysis as I mentioned above, I firmly believe that people now is well educated. It is not only a trend to equip us with cutting-edge knowledge in this high level civilized society but also a huge bonus for us to enrich our spiritual life by acquiring good education. Under these factors, it is undeniable that people now are well educated.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-19 18:48
辛苦批改的筒子了~thanks ! 求共同进步!
作者: ningjie111    时间: 2012-11-19 21:38
11.18 独立
Education is a goal that people have beenpursuing for a long time. Since the ancient times(time), people have started to achieve this aimbecause education can benefitindividuals from both intrinsic satisfaction and extrinsic materialimprovement. But people now or in the pastare (easier to be educated )is still a debated issue(不太明白这句话的作用,是不是少了easier). From my perspective, we are now are bettereducated.

Although in the ancient time, it is easier forpeople to learn some basic skills due to easier and not complex(这里的表述有点繁复了,可以直接说primitive) work; (用逗号)manysurveys have proved that people now are smarter than those several centuriesago. According to an international social research from 23 countries in 2011,individuals now are more agile andable to quickly apply the knowledge which they learned than they are before (直接then before不是更直接,有时候太繁复会啰嗦)as the advanced technology has contributed us so much(due to theadvanced technology 更精练). In the past, people only rely on paper books and followwhat the teachers say, so the channels for them to study are limited; (这里用分号好吗?直接句掉不行吗?) nowadays, mass media provide more information about what’s going on in the worldand timely current issues, broadening their horizons excessively and accessingto good education easily.


In addition, a variety of policies now in manynations also facilitate residents to obtain more superior quality ineducation(我的疑问是,可不可以直接说higher education, hencepeople become more welleducated. For example, China has conducted a freecompulsory education system, which offers a large number of favorable policiesfor us to attend schools. It is the free and attractive legislation that(这里是强调句吗?如果是强调句后面要加enables individuals (to) have a goodopportunity to go to schools. However, in the past, many of us cannot affordthe fundamental fees for eating andliving(个人觉得livingexpensenative也更精练), let alone the extra money for education.Therefore, it is impossible for citizens to gain higher education and beingeducated well in the ancient times(in ancienttime).


Given these convincing analysis as I mentionedabove, I firmly believe that people now is well educated. It is not only atrend to equip us with cutting-edgeknowledge in this high level civilized society but also a huge bonus for us toenrich our spiritual life by acquiring good education. Under these factors, itis undeniable that people now are well educated.


总体评价,内容太少了,可以在更丰富点。像第一段的survey之后可以用一段具体的例子说明比如说internet的发展,更多人可以网上自学,或者说ipadkindle这种移动阅读器可以让人们能够随时随地阅读学习。巴拉巴拉之类的例子。有些长句太刻意弄复杂了,反而容易错,而且显得很繁琐,不精练。最好写一些有把握的句子。不要太刻意。最好是在多一段,字数稍微少了点。个别语法错误要注意。。。
有些地方很精彩,整体架构也不错,加油哦!
作者: zhisheng2200    时间: 2012-11-20 10:58
兄弟,你的11月19独立呢。。。
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-20 19:26
11月19日
独立 It is more important to choose friends that have fun with than to choose friends that will help you when you need them
综合 TPO19

There is a famous household story in China about three visits to thatch, Liubei calls on Zhugeliang for three times and asks Zhu to assist him in establishing Shu. Moved by Liu’s earnestness, Zhu eventually promises him to make military strategies. Like Zhu in the story, I prefer to choose a friend that will give a hand when I’m in trouble.

These individuals who can help us in the hour of needs are true friends, and we will cherish them more. From time to time, friendship is an intangible asset that hundreds of thousands of people have been pursuing. Time-tested friendship can enhance relationships among people. I believe that nobody hopes his or her friend will turn around and walk away when he or she are anxious in the plight. Generally speaking, when you are asking for help, while your friends always find some excuses to refute your beg, how do you think about your relationship? Can you still trust them and have fun with them? I am afraid that we do not expect we have such kind of friends. As a saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed, so the faith that the people who only have fun with us cannot last for long. At the end, our friendship will be endangered.

Friends who always stand at our sides in dilemma can lift the sense of happiness and boost the harmonious relationship in the society. As we know, nowadays, the fast speed of modern life has compelled us to a stressful pace, the rapid development of globalization and civilization has exploited most of our leisure time. Every day, we need to address a large amount of files like a small mountain. But in this high depressed environment, when our friends can give us timely communication and accompany us all the time, we will get rid of these annoying matters quickly and adjust ourselves easily. As a result, we can have a pleasant and happy life. These factors are really important to ensure a harmonious society.

Although those who can have fun with us indeed make us happy at that time, this kind of pleasure is temporary and cannot satisfy our enduring needs. They can neither guarantee a time-tested friendship nor contribute to peaceful and public relationships among the communities. Taking all of these elements into consideration, I firmly believe that people who can help us is essential than those who can bring short-term happy. Hence, next time when you want to choose a friend, why not elect some can help you?
作者: 浅吟天    时间: 2012-11-20 20:13
贴出来半小时我就改掉了,求表扬
黄色 好的,绿色 建议,红色 有问题的

There is a famous household story in China about three visits to thatch, Liubei calls on Zhugeliang for three times and asks Zhu to assist him in establishing Shua dynasty,老外不知道shu是什么,虽然三国也不是什么王朝,但他们还是不知道,哦也). Moved by Liu’s earnestness, Zhu eventually promises him to make military strategies. Like Zhu in the story, I prefer to choose a friend that will give a hand when I’m in trouble.(类比是你和诸葛亮,但诸葛亮没有选帮他一把的朋友啊,是刘备选了。。这。。)

These individuals who can help us in the hour of needs are true friends, and we will cherish them more. From time to time, friendship is an intangible asset that hundreds of thousands of people have been pursuing. Time-tested friendship can enhance relationships among people. I believe that nobody hopes his or her friend will turn around and walk away when he or she
are(单数)anxious(desperate更好点?) in the plight. Generally speaking, when you are asking for help, while your friends always find some excuses to refute your beg, how do you think about your relationship? Can you still trust them and have fun with them? I am afraid that we do not expect we have such kind of friends. As a saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed,(赞!) so the faith that the people who only have fun with us cannot last for long. At inthe end, our friendship will be endangered.

Friends who always stand at our sides in dilemma can lift the sense of happiness and boost the harmonious relationship in the society. As we know, nowadays, the fast speed of modern life has compelled us to a stressful pace, the rapid development of globalization and civilization has exploited most of our leisure time. Every day, we need to address a large amount of files like a small mountain. But in this high depressed environment, when our friends can give us timely communication and accompany us all the time, we will get rid of these annoying matters quickly and adjust ourselves easily. As a result, we can have a pleasant and happy life. These factors are really important to ensure a harmonious society.
(这些是对构建和谐社会很关键,但再点一下和狐朋狗友比很重要这点把)

Although those who can have fun with us indeed make us happy at that time, this kind of pleasure is temporary and cannot satisfy our enduring needs. They can neither guarantee a time-tested friendship nor contribute to peaceful and public relationships among the communities. Taking all of these elements into consideration, I firmly believe that people who can help us is
(加个more essential than those who can bring short-term happy(名词). Hence, next time when you want to choose a friend, why not elect some(someone) can help you?

总的来说 我画了很多闪光的地方,很好!
但我总觉得每段开头应该来个主旨句。我就一边读一边自己找隐晦的比较两种朋友的重要性。希望点明!
你就是口语分队里那个liz哇?

作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-20 20:51
TPO 19
The lecture and reading passage hold opposite opinions toward a new tactic, called "buzzing". The speaker illustrates that the statements in the article are misleading and points out the inaccuracy in each of them.

First of all, the reading mentions that buzzers usually don't tell the truth. However, the lecturer rebuts this perspective as nonsense by saying that company often hires those who use their products and consider the products are good. Hence, consumers can get the true news from the buzzers.

Moreover, regarding the second argument in the passage, that people listen to buzzers' endorsement less critically than they should result in harming consumers, is also rejected by the man. He asserts that individuals always talk with buzzers and ask them a lot of questions about the product, such as the price, service and how long the cellphone will be used. If buzzers' answers cannot satisfy them, people will not buy the products. Therefore, it is fairly unwarranted that people will not be suspicious of the claims the buzzers said.

Finally, the speaker contradicts the statement that buzzing is likely to have negative effect on social relationships. He demonstrates that if the products are bad, organizations will not hire buzzer to promote their products. On the contrary, if people try the buzzers' products and think they are good, they would like to buy it. As a result, after such a good experience, they tend to trust others more instead of mistrust and the spread of dishonesty.

In sum, the lecture disproves the reading passage completely for accurate reasons.
作者: zhisheng2200    时间: 2012-11-20 21:54
The lecture and reading passage hold opposite opinions toward a new tactic, called "buzzing". The speaker illustrates that the statements in the article are misleading and points out the inaccuracy in each of them.



First of all, the reading mentions that buzzers usually don't(do not) tell the truth. However, the lecturer rebuts this perspective as nonsense by saying that company often hires those who use their products and (really)consider the products are good. Hence, consumers can get the true news from the buzzers.



Moreover, regarding the second argument in the passage, that people listen to buzzers' endorsement less critically than they should result(s) in harming consumers,(这里results应该是小从句,后面这句is句子主干,但是感觉少了什么) is also rejected by the man(应该一直保持lecturer). He asserts that individuals always talk with buzzers and ask them a lot of questions about the product, such as the price, service and how long the cellphone will behave been used. If buzzers' answers cannot satisfy them, people will not buy the products. Therefore, it is fairly unwarranted that people will not be suspicious of the claims the buzzers said.



Finally, the speaker contradicts the statement that buzzing is likely to have negative effect on social relationships. He demonstrates that if the products are(were) bad, organizations will(would) not hire buzzer to promote their products. On the contrary, if people try the buzzers' products and think they are good, they would like to buy it. As a result, after such a good experience, they will tend to trust others more ofen instead of mistrust and the spread of dishonesty.



In sum, the lecture disproves the reading passage completely for accurate reasons.(个人感觉结尾虽然是模版,但是也应该根据实际变一变,比如这次是一个推销员上来做LECTURE,就别用accurate)

作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-21 23:06
From time to time, education is a hot-button issue for hundreds of thousands of families. Here comes a question: should a professor spend more time on teaching or doing research? From my perspective, it is more important for teachers to take a large amount of time to study a project than teaching in the classrooms.

Doing researches can not only enrich one’s own professional knowledge but also pass on more compelling academic theories to students, boosting the advances of one certain field. Only when we are really engaged in the real working environment can we know what improvement needed, how to close the gap between abstract knowledge and realistic application. If teachers themselves can understand these thorny problems clearly, then they can endow time-tested theories to other scholars and his or her students efficiently.

Moreover, researches can facilitate the development of our social science, improving people’s spiritual and material lives. As we know, most of inventions now are tested for thousands times by dedicated scientists. From electricity to bulb, from telegraph to cellphone, from black television to LCD television then to internet, we can see our lives have been influenced greatly. It is a great many researches and experiments that we can have colorful and comfortable modern lives. If all the scholars are standing beside the podiums, it is hard for us to imagine what our world will be.

One more appealing advantage toward research is that it can attract more outstanding talents to a country, accelerating the pace of one nation’s development. For example, America is a strong nation which attracts a myriad of scholars attending their universities and cooperating with their scientists each year. Why? Because it has striking reputations and can provide a lot of advanced technologies. Undoubtedly, Most of winner in Nobel are Americans, their excellent performance makes others believe that United States is scholars’ dream land, and they can realize their own dream there. Therefore, many scientists are willing to go to America to broaden their horizons. As a result, further development will occur in United States. From this point, we can know research can bring benefits beyond an individuals’ interest.

Given these reasons I mentioned above, I am firmly believe that professors should contribute more time to research. This is a virtuous cycle for both the teachers themselves and the whole society, even a country.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-21 23:11
TPO18  11.20综合
The reading and the passage hold opposite opinions toward the satisfied solutions to save Torreya trees. The professor illustrates that these approaches cannot be successful by pointing the inaccuracies of each of the reasons in the passage.

First all of, the article mentions that reestablish Torreya in the same location in which it thrived for thousands of years will be a favorable option. However, the lecture rebuts this claim by saying that this area now has been strongly effected by changing climate, such as global warming. In addition, the wetland has been drained, so the region around the original location has become drier, and it is impossible for Torreya to survive successfully.

Moreover, regarding the second argument the reading asserts, that move these trees to an entirely different location where far from its Florida microclimate, is also rejected by the speaker. He uses another kind of tree to explain it. He says that black locas(着实没懂哪个树名字) tree was once moved by human beings. But these trees thrive so fast as to endanger some plants in local place. As a result, they kill other plants in the new environment. Obviously, it is not a suitable way to solve this problem.

Finally, the professor contradicts the author's perspective about preserving Torreya in research center directly. He demonstrates that the population of Terreya can be captured in the center, and they cannot resist disease. Therefore, these trees cannot germinate and survive from disease for long term. What's more, it's hard to keep a large number of trees in a research center. Now, we can see the lecturer completely argues this point provided by the author.
作者: dsnadja    时间: 2012-11-22 11:29
From time to time, education is a hot-button issue for hundreds of thousands of families. Here comes a question: should a professor spend more time on teaching or doing research? From my perspective, it is more important for teachers to take a large amount of time to study a project than teaching in the classrooms. (第一个应该是 do,第二个是 to teach 吧)。

Doing researches can not only enrich one’s own professional knowledge but also(Doing research 并不能pass on,这里是否要写是让教授pass on 呢) pass on more compelling academic theories to students, (同样主语问题)boosting the advances of one certain field. Only when we are really engaged in the real working environment can we know what improvement needed, how to close the gap between abstract knowledge and realistic application. If teachers themselves can understand these thorny problems clearly, then they can endow time-tested theories to other scholars and his or her students efficiently.

Moreover, researches can facilitate the development of our social science, improving people’s spiritual and material lives. As we know, most of inventions now are tested for thousands times by dedicated scientists. From electricity to bulb, from telegraph to cellphone, from black television to LCD television then to internet, we can see (we can see 删掉更好一点)our lives have been influenced greatly. It is (because of 或者是 thanks to 比it is 更明确)a great many researches and experiments that(去掉) we can have colorful and comfortable modern lives. If all the scholars are standing beside the podiums, it is hard for us to imagine what our world will be.

One more appealing advantage towards research is that it can attract more outstanding talents to a country, accelerating the pace of one nation’s development. For example, America is a strong nation which attracts a myriad of scholars attending their universities and cooperating with their scientists each year. Why? Because it has striking reputations and can provide a lot of advanced technologies. Undoubtedly, Most of winner in Nobel are Americans, and their excellent performance makes others believe that United States is scholars’ dream land, and they can realize their own dream there.(这句话表达的意思过多,分开讲或者加入从句比较好) Therefore, many scientists are willing to go to America to broaden their horizons. As a result, further development will occur in United States. From this point, we can know research can bring benefits beyond an individuals’ interest.

Given these reasons I mentioned above, I am(去掉 am) firmly believe that professors should contribute more time(time 可以去掉) to research. This is a virtuous cycle for both the teachers themselves and the whole society, even a country.
作者: 浅吟天    时间: 2012-11-22 18:23
TPO18  11.20综合
The reading and the passage hold opposite opinions toward the satisfied solutions to save Torreya trees. The professor illustrates that these approaches cannot be successful by pointing the inaccuracies of each of the reasons in the passage.

First all of, the article mentions that reestablish(reestablishing) Torreya in the same location in which it thrived for thousands of years will be a favorable option. However, the lecture(lecturer) rebuts this claim by saying that this area now has been strongly effected by changing climate, such as global warming. In addition, the wetland has been drained, so the region around the original location has become drier, and(与前面其实不是并列,是个结果,thus,as a result更好~)it is impossible for Torreya to survive successfully.

Moreover, regarding the second argument the reading asserts, (为什么有逗号?)that move(moving) these trees to an entirely different location where far from its Florida microclimate, is(我着实没搞懂这句话你是从哪里断的?) also rejected by the speaker. He uses another kind of tree to explain it. He says that black locas(着实没懂哪个树名字)(握手,什么black tree....) tree was once moved by human beings. But these trees thrive(thrived) so fast as to endanger some plants in local place. As a result, they kill(killed) other plants in the new environment. Obviously, it is not a suitable way to solve this problem.

Finally, the professor contradicts the author's perspective about preserving Torreya in research center directly. He demonstrates that the population of Terreya can(还是cannot) be captured in the center, and they cannot resist disease. Therefore, these trees cannot germinate and survive from disease for long term. What's more, it's hard to keep a large number of trees in a research center. Now, we can see the lecturer completely argues this point provided by the author.

点都到了,挺好的。最后一点表达还可以更精确一下哈~
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-22 19:33
11月21日
独立 Patience is usually not a good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.
综合 TPO17

During our limited life, there are a lot of decisions we need to make. Here comes a dilemma, which strategy is better for making a wise choice? Should we be patient or take action quickly? From my perspective, taking actions now rather later is the top priority.

First of all, life is short, there are a great many unexpected situations will appear, and being patient sometimes will bring regret to us. Hence, taking timely actions can help us have a satisfying and meaningful life. I believe most of us have seen a classic romantic movie, Titanic. There is an impressing sense that a fat woman is blaming herself for not eating the half of left chocolate cake when the ship is sinking. She is on diet and doesn’t want to obtain excessive calorie at that time. To her, a big pity is left in her limited life. Actually, in our society, a large number of people like the woman in the film worry about many things and always hesitate to make a decision. At the end, when some unexpected emergences happen, they only can scold themselves and leave regret in their life. From this point, we can see that it is necessary for us to do things soon rather than deferring them.

Moreover, taking timely actions is a good strategy for an individual to scale a higher career goal such as position promotion. Although being patient can let us consider issues deeply from diverse aspects and people can make a perfect plan from a comprehensive picture, this strategy is not suitable for employees any more. In our days, time is money. A boss cannot leave a large amount of time to you to finish a task. Efficiency is more important for career success. Meanwhile, employers are more likely to promote those who are decisive and shrewd. If you always complete your tasks slowly, then give them an excuse that you need a long time to make a perfect result, do you think your boss will let you sit in your position? I don’t think so. Therefore, a quick action is really essential for your future success.

Given all these reason I mentioned above, I can firmly believe that being patient is not a wise way to make a living in the fierce competitive society, because all things change so rapid. In order to guarantee a significant and colorful life without pity, why not take actions quickly instead of keeping patient?
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-22 21:14
11.21 作业, TPO 17
The article and the listening hold opposite opinions toward whether human population and the corresponding increase in agriculture and pesticide use have negative effect on birds. The professor illustrates that the author's assertion is unconvincing by pointing out the inaccuracies in each of them.

First all of, the reading mentions that human populations and settlements continue to expand, birds natural habitats will continue to disappear. However, the speaker rebuts this perspective by saying that urban expansion will provide better and larger lands for other types of birds result in increasing some birds' population. Although some birds such as hocks cannot be found in cities, their preys are increasing. Hence, some species shrink, while other species grow.

Moreover, regarding the second reasons in the reading passage that the agriculture will also lead to further destruction of bird habitat, the lecturer rejects it. He demonstrates that the wilderness will not be cut soon as the reading describes. In fact, less lands for agriculture every year, and more introductions for new productive crops. As a result, more food per unit land will produce. Therefore, there is no need to destroy wilderness in this area.

Finally, the professor contradicts the pointview in the passage that more chemical pesticides will kill birds and cause the decline of bird population. The speaker explains that now a large number of people have aware of the traditional habitat is essential for birds. There are two major changes due to people's concern. First, much less toxic pesticides are developed. Second, more growing trends for pest resist crops. So more genetically designed crops are applied result in less harm for birds at all.
作者: dsnadja    时间: 2012-11-22 22:38
11.21 作业, TPO 17
The article and the listening hold opposite opinions toward whether human population and the corresponding increase in agriculture and pesticide use have negative effect on birds. The professor illustrates that the author's assertion is unconvincing by pointing out the inaccuracies in each of them(them 前面对应的是assertion,单复不一致).

First all of, the reading mentions that human populations and settlements continue to expand, (and)birds natural habitats will continue to disappear. However, the speaker rebuts this perspective by saying that urban expansion will provide better and larger lands for other types of birds (which will)result in increasing some birds' population. Although some birds such as hocks cannot be found in cities, their preys are increasing. Hence, some species shrink, while other species grow.

Moreover, regarding the second reasons(reason) in the reading passage that the agriculture will also lead to further destruction of bird habitat, the lecturer rejects it. He demonstrates that the wilderness will not be cut soon as the reading describes. In fact, (there are)less lands for agriculture every year, and more introductions for new productive crops. As a result, more food per unit land will (be produced) produce. Therefore, there is no need to destroy wilderness in this area.

Finally, the professor contradicts the pointview in the passage that more chemical pesticides will kill birds and cause the decline of bird population. The speaker explains that now a large number of people have aware of(that 去掉of) the traditional habitat is essential for birds. There are two major changes due to people's concern. First, much less toxic pesticides are developed. Second, more growing trends for pest resist crops. So more genetically designed crops are applied result in less harm for birds at all.
作者: dsnadja    时间: 2012-11-23 14:29
11月21日
独立 Patience is usually not a good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.
综合 TPO17

During our limited life(单复数对应, our和life不对应), there are a lot of decisions we need to make. Here comes a dilemma, which strategy is better for making a wise choice? Should we be patient or take action quickly? From my perspective, taking actions now rather later is the top priority.

First of all, life is short,(少连词) there are a great many unexpected situations (语法错误,出现两个动词 。加个that吧)will appear, and being patient sometimes will bring regret to us. Hence, taking timely actions can help us have a satisfying and meaningful life. I believe most of us have seen a classic romantic movie, Titanic. There is an impressing sense that a fat woman is blaming herself for not eating the half of left chocolate cake when the ship is sinking. She is on diet and doesn’t want to obtain excessive calorie at that time. To her, a big pity is left in her limited life.(感觉这个例子没有很好的显示主题。) Actually, in our society, a large number of people like the woman in the film worry about many things and always hesitate to make a decision. At the end, when some unexpected emergences happen, they only can scold themselves and leave regret in their life. From this point, we can see that it is necessary for us to do things soon rather than deferring them. (主题句放在第一句会让人觉得文章结构很清晰,就明白段落中的例子所表示的意思是什么)

Moreover, taking timely actions is a good strategy for an individual to scale a higher career goal such as position promotion. Although being patient can let us consider issues deeply from diverse aspects and people can make a perfect plan from a comprehensive picture, this strategy is not suitable for employees any more. In our days, time is money. A boss cannot leave a large amount of time to you to finish a task. Efficiency is more important for career success. Meanwhile, employers are more likely to promote those who are decisive and shrewd. If you always complete your tasks slowly, then give them an excuse that you need a long time to make a perfect result, do you think your boss will let you sit in your position? I don’t think so. Therefore, a quick action is really essential for your future success. (这段多是论述的感觉,可以把中间的某部分用一个例子说出来,就感觉文章丰富很多。)

Given all these reason I mentioned above, I can firmly believe that being patient is not a wise way to make a living in the fierce competitive society, because all things change so rapid(rapidly). In order to guarantee a significant and colorful life without pity, why not take actions quickly instead of keeping patient?(结尾段很好)
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-24 19:03
TPO 15, 11.23综合

The listening passage and the reading passage uphold completely opposite opinions. The speaker claims that fence, volunteer and disease-causing virus are not effective measures to stop the spread of the cane toad in Australia. This assertion totally refutes the viewpoint in the article.

According to the professor, young cane toad and its eggs are living in the water such as streams, which directly contradicts the author's perspective that a fence prevent the toads from moving into those parts of Australia that they have not yet colonized. The professor demonstrates that water can push eggs get through the fence to the other side. Hence, this method is obviously infeasible.

Moreover, the lecturer casts doubt on the second reason in the reading, which suggests that volunteers can capture and destroy these toads. He makes the points that untrained volunteers will cause negative effect on native species which are endangering. In addition, it is really hard for them to distinguish the native toads from the cane toads when they are young.

Finally, the instructor challenges the statement in the passage, which indicates that a disease-causing virus can control the cane toad populations. He explains that this infected species from Australia can reach America. As a result, these toads will cause damage to key native reptile species in South of America.

In sum, it is obviously that the presenter discerns successfully the inaccuracies in each of these argument in the article and he has absolutely different ideas on the topic in the reading.
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-24 19:06
11月23日  (耗时33分钟,超时拉~~~~)
独立 Agree or disagree:Your job has greater happiness than your social life

Happiness likes a scare green rose that a great many people yearn to pick it up during their short lives. Now, here comes a thorny issue toward which element will contribute most to it. Does one person’s job overweighs the social life about above question? From my perspective, individual’s job does bring greater happiness.

Even though social life is colorful and full of joys, an undeniable fact now is that we are living in a fast booming society and people spend more time on their career, we do have a little time with our relatives and friends together. Clearly, the only direct connections with our lives are our jobs. According to A theory of Human Motivation Psychological Review which was written by Marlos, only when people address the fundamental needs for living can they achieve higher goal such as happiness. In another words, if we are starving and worrying about our own living conditions, it is impossible for us to consider other ambitions. In reality, job can provide us the basic needs. When we get a well-paid job, we can get rid off the plight and live a happy life.

Job can bring us the sense of belonging and achievement, which is vital factor to people’s pleasant lives result in happiness. Nowadays, the physical manifestations of rapid social change surround us, affecting almost everything we do. The way we work, the way job is supplied. I do believe that most of us want to reach a higher position because it can elevate our inner acknowledgement and create unimaginable spiritual pleasure. These intangible assets from extra mental bonus can keep for a long time and stimulate the sense of happiness from the bottom of our hearts.

One more thing that I want to mention is that a huge success from work can double our happiness. For instance, Andrew Carnegie, a Scottish-American industrialist, who lead the enormous expansion of American steel industry. His first job in the United States was as a worker in a bobbin company. Later on he became a bill logger for the owner of that corporation. Eventually, he progressed up the ranks of a telegraph organization. In the end, he built his own steel industry. Meanwhile, he was also an important philanthropist in his era. To him, the series of successes in his life create a large amount of money result in dedicating greater happiness by helping those who were extremely in want of help.

Given all these reasons I mentioned above, I firmly believe that job can benefit us a lot than the social life. Hence, next time when you are crave for greater happiness, why not choose a satisfying job?
作者: lmylacoste    时间: 2012-11-25 09:40
The listening passage and the reading passage uphold completely opposite opinions. The speaker claims that fence, volunteer and disease-causing virus are not effective measures to stop the spread of the cane toad in Australia. This assertion totally refutes the viewpoint in the article.

According to the professor, young cane toad and its eggs are living in the water such as streams,
which directly contradicts the author's perspective that a fence prevent the toads from moving into those parts of Australia that they have not yet colonized.(最好是将后面的原因联系起来,不然感觉句子的意思断了哈) The professor demonstrates that water can push eggs get through the fence to the other side. Hence, this method is obviously infeasible.

Moreover, the lecturer casts doubt on the second reason in the reading, which suggests that volunteers can capture and destroy these toads. He makes the points that untrained volunteers will cause negative effect on native species which are
endangering(后要接宾语的)—>endangered. In addition, it is really hard for them to distinguish the native toads from the cane toads when they are young.

Finally, the instructor challenges the statement in the passage, which indicates that a disease-causing virus can control the cane toad populations. He explains that this infected species from Australia can reach America.
(可以加点这种toadASUAME是怎么过去的) As a result, these toads will cause damage to key native reptile species(好像是影响那些在美国的同类~ in South of America.

In sum, it is obviously that the presenter discerns successfully the inaccuracies in each of these argument in the article and he has absolutely different ideas on the topic in the reading.



恩,要让字数变得更多一点,其他很好
作者: lmylacoste    时间: 2012-11-25 10:24
Happiness likes a scare green rose that a great many people yearn to pick it up during their short lives. Now, here comes a thorny issue toward which element will contribute most to it.(很有文采)Does one person’s job overweighs the social life about (可以跟确切点譬如as the answer toabove question? From my perspective, individual’s job does bring greater happiness.

Even though social life is colorful and full of joys, an undeniable fact now is that we are living in a fast booming society and people spend more time on their career, we do have a little time with our relatives and friends together. Clearly, the only direct connections with our lives are our jobs. According to A theory of
Human Motivation Psychological Review which was written by Marlos
指的是不是这个?Maslow's hierarchy of needs, only when people address the fundamental needs for living can they achieve higher goal such as happiness. In another words,(既让文章清楚,又加了字数!) if we are starving and worrying about our own living conditions, it is impossible for us to consider other ambitions. In reality, job can provide us the basic needs. When we get a well-paid job, we can get rid of给个phrase参考一下哈emerge from the plight and live a happy life.

Job can bring us the sense of belonging and achievement,
which is—>are vital factor to people’s pleasant lives result in happiness.(结构好像稍显混乱,后面result in happiness实际可以删去) Nowadays, the physical manifestations(这个词组身体反应?) of rapid social change surround us, affecting almost everything we do. The way we work, the way job is supplied. I do believe that most of us want to reach a higher position because it can elevate our inner acknowledgement 好像没有这个词组。。。—>sense of self-identity and create unimaginable spiritual pleasure. These intangible assets from extra mental bonus can keep for a long time and stimulate the sense of happiness from the bottom of our hearts.

One more thing that I want to mention is that a huge success from work can double our happiness. For instance, Andrew Carnegie, a Scottish-American industrialist, who lead the enormous expansion of American steel industry. His first job in the United States was as a worker in a bobbin company. Later on he became a bill logger for the owner of that corporation. Eventually, he progressed up the ranks of a telegraph organization. In the end, he built his own steel industry. Meanwhile, he was also an important philanthropist in his era. To him, the series of successes in his life create a large amount of money result in dedicating greater happiness by helping those who were extremely in want of help.

最后最好加一句AC非常开心

Given all these reasons I mentioned above, I firmly believe that job can benefit us a lot than the social life. Hence, next time when you are crave for greater happiness, why not choose a satisfying job?



首尾段文采斐然

前两个分论点很好,第三个应该算是第二个的补充?

写的很好,又学了很多词汇~
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-25 23:47
11月24
独立 Agree or disagree: it is impossible to be completely honest with your friend.
综合 TPO14

Friendship is like a scarce fragrant green rose that a great many people yearn to pick it up during their short lives. Now here comes a thorny issue towards that whether it is possible for people to keep completely honest to their friends? From my perspective, people shouldn’t maintain honest to their partners all the time.

Everybody has his or her privacy, we should respect others’ right. Although honesty is one of the most important virtues for us to consider when we make a friend, we actually cannot deny the fact that we hope we can have our own secrets, which are personal and special things for us. This part in our bottom of heart like a pure paradise, we don’t hope anyone to destroy it. From rational viewpoint, we can see fairly honesty is hard for us to keep.

However compelling these cases may sound, we cannot overshadow the significant role that proper space between bona fide friends plays in friendship. On the other hand, excessive interference on partners’ privacy and enforce our friends to be honest will endanger our relationships. Consider two of my classmates as an example, Jessica and Rose were really good friends, they always ate, studied and went shopping together. In our eyes, it is impossible for us to believe they quarreled and their friendship had walked to the end. Later I asked Jessica about the reason. She told me that Rose always wanted her to tell anything her knew, after a long time, this thing drove her crazy. Jessica wanted to have her own free space rather than being supervised. I learn a lesson from this case, even we are best friends, sometimes we should leave room to allow counterpart to have his or her own life, and if we pursuit 100 percentages of honesty, our friendship will not keep for a long time.

One more thing I want to mention is that objective circumstances may contribute to incompletely honest. Nowadays, the rapid changes in our society and fierce competition in the business realm impose many burdens on our modern lives. These series of factors sometimes force us to tell a lie. For example, merchant often cover up some defects of their products to their friend. It is profits that they tend to choose to tell lies. We cannot blame these merchants, because it is their status force them to do it, we cannot avoid such a case when we enter the real working environment.

Given all these reasons I mentioned above, I firmly believe that it is hard and also impossible for us to keep 100% honesty to our friends. To keep our friendship enduring or have a better life, why should we require others to keep totally honest?
作者: lizchang1990    时间: 2012-11-25 23:47
The listening passage and reading passage uphold totally opposite opinions. The professor illustrates that the benefits of salvage logging are questionable.

To begin with, the speaker contradicts the author's perspective that salvage logging removes the remains of dead trees and makes room for fresh growth immediately. He demonstrates that removing dead trees can not create right conditions for other tree growing. On the contrary, decomposed trees can rich the soil and create suitable lands for future generations. Therefore, this advantage is fairly unwarranted.

Moreover, the lecturer casts doubt on the second reason in the passage, which suggests that rotting wood can cause harmful insects emerging and insect infestation will destroy the health of the forest. He makes the points that the spruce bark beetle have live in the habitat where the spruce trees grow for hundreds of years but causing no damage to that area. In fact, moving the dead trees will destroy the suitable land for new plants. Hence, the method in the article will pose more harmful influence than insect do.

Finally, the instructor challenges the statement in the reading that salvage has economic benefits. He explains that salvage logging is small and cannot last for a long time. In addition, the vehicle which made by salvage logging are expensive to maintain. What's more, jobs that are provided by many industries are only temporary, and they usually hire more experienced workers from outside place than local residents.

In sum, it is obviously that the presenter discerns the inaccuracies in each of these arguments in the article and he has absolutely different ideas on the topic in the passage.
作者: daisyrong    时间: 2012-11-26 17:19
先来综合吧,独立我还需要点时间,我白天要上课,不好意思The listening passage and reading passageuphold totally opposite opinions. The professor illustrates that the benefitsof salvage logging are questionable.


To begin with, the speaker contradicts theauthor's perspective that salvage logging removes the remains of dead trees andmakes room for fresh growth immediately. He demonstrates that removing deadtrees can not (cannot连写,估计这里是不小心吧) create right conditions for other tree growing. On the contrary,decomposed trees can richrich adj. enrich the soil and create suitable lands for futuregenerations. Therefore, this advantage is fairly unwarranted.
(这里的suitable land我觉得不是很恰当。suitable condition/ habitat/ environment 应该都可以)
Moreover, the lecturer casts doubt on thesecond reason in the passage, which suggests (这个从句好像有点问题,我不知道which指代什么,是lecturerdoubt?还是“second reasons”)that rotting (adj. rotten) wood can cause harmful insectsemerging and insect infestation will destroy the health of the forest. He makesthe points that the spruce bark beetle have live (时态) in the habitat where the spruce trees grow for hundreds of yearsbut causing no damage to that area. In fact, moving move只是移动的意思,应该是move to +地点,此处应该是移除的意思,remove比较合适)the dead trees willdestroy the suitable landfor new plants. Hence, the method in the article will pose more harmfulinfluence than insects do.

Finally, the instructor challenges thestatement in the reading that salvage logginghas economic benefits. He explains that salvagelogging (应该是benefit很小而且不能持久)is small and cannotlast for a long time. In addition, the vehicle which made (怎么能说“made”呢,这些vehicle是用来salvage logging)by salvage logging are too expensive to maintain. What's more, jobs thatare provided by many industries are only temporary, and they usually hire moreexperienced workers from outside place than local residents. (这里and连接的应该是两个并列的句子,所以没听过原文的人,会自动把后半句的“they”理解成为“jobs”即前一句的主语,这样后半句就不对了)

In sum, it is obviously(这里不应该用副词) that the presenter discerns the inaccuracies in each of thesearguments in the article and he has absolutely different ideas on the topic inthe passage. (结尾怪怪的,翻译过来是“很明显,presenter 指出了文中各个argumentinaccuracies, 并且他有跟passage不同的观点” 按我的逻辑应该是“这个presenter持有跟文中完全不同的观点,并且指明了每个argumentweakness/inaccuracy
作者: daisyrong    时间: 2012-11-26 21:10
Friendship is like a scarce fragrant green rose that a great manypeople yearn to pick it up during their short lives.Now here comes a thorny issue towards that whether it is possible for people tokeep completely honest to their friends? From my perspective, people shouldn’tmaintain honest to their partners all the time.

Everybody has his or her privacy, we shouldrespect others’ right. Although honesty is one of the most important virtuesfor us to consider when we make a friend, we actually cannot deny the fact that we hope we can have our own secrets, which arepersonal and special things for us. (这一句好多“we”啊,看得我有些头晕)This part in our bottom ofheart like(如果我没分析错,like在这里是“像”的意思,是介词,所以本句没有谓语动词) a pure paradise, we don’t hope anyone to destroy it. From rationalviewpoint, we can see fairly honesty is hard for us to keep.

However compelling asthese cases may sound, we cannot overshadow the significant role that properspace between bona fide friends plays in friendship. On the other hand,excessive interference on partners’ privacy and enforce our friends to behonest will endanger our relationships(按照GMAT的语法来说,这里用and连接的两个句子不并列). Consider two of myclassmates as an example, (我觉得这句话说完了,应该用句号或者冒号) Jessica and Rosewere really good friends, they always ate, studied and went shopping together. In our eyes, it is impossible for us to believethey quarreled and their friendship had walked to the end. (又是“in our eyes”,又是for us”觉得有些重复累赘Later Iasked Jessica about the reason. She told me that Rose always wanted (我觉得“wanted”有点简单,而且好像不怎么用,required的吧) her to tell anything her knew, after a long time, this thing droveher crazy. ( “after a long time“之前的那句话应该说完了吧,后面应该句号把两句分开,或者用从句吧) Jessica wanted (单词上可以变换一下花样expectedto have her own freespace rather than being supervised. I learn a lesson from this case, (我还是觉得都好在这不合适,应该冒号,或者+that)even we are best friends, sometimes we should leaveroom to allow counterpart to have his or her own life space, andif we pursuit 100 percentages of honesty, our friendship will not keep for along time.

One more thing I want to mention is thatobjective circumstances may contribute to incompletely honesty. Nowadays, the rapid changes in our society andfierce competition in the business realm impose many burdens on our modernlives. These series of factors sometimes force us to tell a lie. For example,merchants often cover up some defects of their productsto their friend. It is profits that they tend to choose to tell lies(是想用强调句吧,“It’sprofit that make them to tell lies). We cannot blamethese merchants, because it is their status thatforce them to do it, and we cannot avoidsuch a case when we enter the real working environment.

Given all these reasons I mentioned above,I firmly believe that it is hard and also impossible for us to keep 100%honesty to our friends. To keep our friendship enduring or have a better life,why should we require others to keep totally honest?
(楼主有些句子有点长,连接词不是很多,可以适当改短点,或者用些从句;可以在句式的花样,和词的替换上下点功夫)




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