ChaseDream

标题: (AI13)求教: 藕的第一篇ISSUE, 将模版改到什么程度算可以?? - AI 13 [打印本页]

作者: sigrid920 时间: 2006-11-13 09:12
标题: (AI13)求教: 藕的第一篇ISSUE, 将模版改到什么程度算可以?? - AI 13

, 13.
“Responsibility for preserving the natural environment ultimately belongs to each individual person, not to government.”

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the opinion stated above. Support your views with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

Dose responsibility for preserving the natural environment ultimately belongs to each individual person, not to government? To some extent/degree, I agree with the speaker’s general assertion. However, the speaker unnecessarily extends this broad assertion to an irreversible extreme while overlooks certain compelling/underlying/hidden/ factors impacting/influence/affect/ this issue. As a matter of fact/in fact/actually, the issue of whether
responsibility for preserving the natural environment ultimately belongs to each individual person, not to government is a complex and controversial one/both complex and controversial. Therefore there is not a universal answer/yardstick, and whether one choice takes precedence/prepondence over the other depends on specific situation. Actually the final judgment should rely on a case-by-case analysis. As far as I am concerned, I agree that
government participation is needed to ensure environmental preservation. My view can be greatly substantiated by the following discussions/evaluations/analysis.

In the first place, the important reason that can be presented to develop my position is that individual and corporations tend to act on behalf of their own short term interest rather than considering the environment and society as a whole. When their own benefits conflict with social interest, they will put their benefit in a more important place/as preference. A good example may be found in the case that although everybody knows that the emissions from automobiles are seriously polluting the air/even though everybody acknowledge that the automobile emissions seriously containment air; few of them are willing to make their short term sacrifices to buy the more expensive hybrid energy cars.
Under this circumstance, it is obvious that the hybrid engine car will be widespread implemented only if the government strictly reinforces the standard on automobile emissions.

In addition, there is another reason for me to choose/select this statement. To illustrate, let us consider that natural environment issues are not only local but local but also international, such as, global warming, over fishing and deforest. Hence another equally important aspect is that only the efforts under international governmental collaborations have stronger resources and powers than individual to prevent those trends.

On the one hand, it is sagacious/invertible to admit that this statement, although suffers from some obvious logical drawbacks, possesses/deserves some merits in some special scenarios in which the implicit rationale behind it accords with common sense and our everyday experience as human beings, hence, is partially indisputable.

In conclusion, issue of whether
responsibility for preserving the natural environment ultimately belongs to each individual person, not to government is a complex one, requiring subjective judgment; consequently, there are no easy or certain answers. Different people possess varies opinions towards these issues according to their own backgrounds, emotional cognitions, and diverse cultures. According to me/in my point of view, a case-by-case study is certainly helping us to elaborate the issue.

藕的作文很烂, 写不出来很多字,所以就想把模版的字弄多一点, 藕到时候就只用写两个理由就可以啦, 蓝色部分是我写的,黑色部分是模版. 请大家帮我把把关, 看看模版是不是太照搬原样啦? 我也想多该该只是我实在找不出比原模版更好的词了~!!

作者: crymeet 时间: 2006-11-14 15:14
模版太明显了吧，好歹改几个词吧

作者: Cantaloupe 时间: 2006-11-15 15:22

发现大家选的魔板都很象的说...可以得到机器的6分，但评卷老师可能会有情绪吧。

作者: sigrid920 时间: 2006-11-15 21:13

偶也是这样担心的, 偶肯定是需要改改了, 就怕偶的水平不高, 改完了以后,一点闪光句子都没有啦~~~

我在CD上找到的模版80%都类似~~看来大家都喜欢用这几个啊, 不知道前人们都把模版改到什么程度为止呢?

作者: Cantaloupe 时间: 2006-11-15 21:37

我觉得关键的是，不要大篇幅的把魔板的套词放在一起，这样既空洞没有意义，也很容易让老师不高兴。

第2段就挺好的，甚至可以在中间再穿插几句闪光句型，更出彩一点。

但第4段就有点凑字数了，呵呵。你觉得呢？

作者: sigrid920 时间: 2006-11-16 10:24

被版主看出来勒~~~!其实藕原本就是想用它来凑字数的.因为藕的英文表达能力确实不强, 就想把模版的字弄多一点, 需要藕自己写的弄少一点

作者: TheSolution 时间: 2009-7-26 20:54
UP!

欢迎光临 ChaseDream (https://forum.chasedream.com/)