TWE 107 请大家看看.

The issue at hand is whether the children should be required to attend some household tasks as soon as
they can. Uopn this question, different people hold different views depending on their respective backgrounds
and standpoints. Some prefer this suggestion, claiming it can teach kids how to work; , yet others yet disagree,
indicating that it is too early for them children to participate in such tasks. As far as I am concerned, however, I think both
are extreme. That is, kids should take part in some household works, but these works should be restricted under
monitor.

there is no conflict between your stance and supporter's, so we cannot conclude that the supporter's opinion is too extrem. by the way, the model of your introduction is too obvious, I cannot give any opinion about that, but it is good idea to show some friends who do not write GMAT. perhaps they can give your some ideas about your model.

On the one hand, children do need to participate in some household works, such as cleaning the floor, washing
the utensils, and weeding the garden. These tasks  benefit  kids' future growth development. First, by doing so, they will understand
how hard their parents make money to support the family. This understanding in turn,  can corrects their improper habits,
such as waste and laziness. Second, doing some household tasks can cultivate some valuable skills which significantly
contribute significantly to their coming development. (? I do not get it, and I will delete the relative clause)For instance, when weeding the garden, they learn how to
manipulate the weeding machine; when washing the kitchen, they learn the qualities of different detergents; even
when cleaning floors, they can manage to plan the scientific step to get the job done. Third, children who do some
regular household jobs often try to apply some fundamental principles to these works. For example, through using
the rod, it can strengthens their understanding about lever law.

On the other hand, the amount of these this work should be limited according to their ages and capabilities. As we
know, when kids just begin to learn work, they are usually excited and do not know some harmful factors in these
works. For instance, some detergents contain harmful elements to their bodies, and weeding machines can jeopardize
children if operated inappropriately. At this time, in these situations, the instructions of the parents are indispensable. Parents,
due to their past experience, can determine which jobs kids can do and which can not. otherwise, a tragedy may happen. Last year, when a kid try to help his mother do some laundering, without instructions he entered in the washing machine. Therefore, not all
household tasks are suitable for kids. can do and lacking sufficient supervising and instruction, neither the tasks nor the kids have the positive results kids can get hurt, and tasks can fail.

In sum, taking into account above mentioned reasons, which are adequate and persuasive, we can arrive at the
conclusion that kids should learn to do some household work when they can do, but these jobs should be examined by
their parents and supervised under adults. Otherwise, the costs maybe outweigh the benefits we can afford.