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AI078 谢谢大家批改

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楼主
发表于 2005-8-21 21:20:00 | 只看该作者

AI078 谢谢大家批改

题目:


78. Most people would agree that buildings represent a valuable record of any society’s past, but controversy arises when old buildings stand on ground that modern planners feel could be better used for modern purposes.


In your opinion, which is more important — preserving historic buildings or encouraging modern development? Explain your position, using reasons and examples based on your own experiences, observations, or reading.


Should the old buildings be used for modern purposes when they stand on ground, such as certain confidential materials? The problem seems to arouse controversy between different opinion groups. Whereas some many advocate that the old buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, so we should protect them, others may strongly oppose that we should explore the important resource for the people now to better use. I agree with the spear insofar as former, however, when recognizing that a more proper solution to the question can only be achieved by incorporating all relevant aspects, I find no empirical evidence to wholly accept the author's position, which appears to be unconvincing in light of more persuasive assertion. So, I would like to the support that the old buildings should be used for the modern purposes.


For the fundamental reason, which raises the debate, is how we define the value source for the human beings. The one definingI would totally agree with is that if the resource could be made for better purpose and the use, which could bring us larger benefits, we should exploit it or substitute the old one for the new one. So, from this point of the view, we should encourage modern development, which will use the land that the old buildings stood. Although the old buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, which may be very essential for the history study, we could not deny the truth that the better use the resource could give birth invaluable wealth, which can beneficial thousands of people, whereas just protecting the exist thing, if not exploit, could not only undermine the value of the resource itself, but also turn out worse results. For example The REP buildings in Shangdong Province, built in the BC 400would be considered a treasured resource, but taking protection for excuse, the local government always thought about relying on the money denoted for it but not  about any other way to develop its town , so how can the town go further ?


Another reason, which I believe the equally important, is that history is developing continuous. Therefore, in the long run, we should optimization the resource as much as possible to make our future more beautiful and more useable.  While the old building represents a valuable record of any society's past, we should substitute it for modern one. Because, for one thing, the land can be better use; for other thing, we should use the modern building to tell the people, the sociality what the recent people think, moreover, this modern building will tell the subsequent men that what happened in this period.


One will argue that how to deal with the past record, which always exist in the old things such as the old buildings. Here we part company. To be honest, it may be the case. However, our modern technological is sufficient to store this record. We could detect the everywhere and then record them in the computer to use whenever we need. Moreover, my dissenters may contend that one cannot detect everything, that is to say we may find more in the future. But I want to ask a question is why we study this record. Of course, we want to use this result of the study make our life better. Thus, we could not always think protect but develop. Because only the more the development, the better we live.


In final analysis, because of the above-mentioned reasons, which probably interweave into an organic whole and become more compelling, we are safely arrived at the conclusion that the old buildings should be used for the modern purpose.


这也是我写的第一篇,说明例子是杜攥得,请大家多多指教


[此贴子已经被作者于2005-8-21 22:11:55编辑过]
沙发
发表于 2005-8-21 22:00:00 | 只看该作者
以下是引用QingPan在2005-8-21 21:20:00的发言:

78. Most people would agree that buildings represent a valuable record of any society’s past, but controversy arises when old buildings stand on ground that modern planners feel could be better used for modern purposes.


In your opinion, which is more important — preserving historic buildings or encouraging modern development? Explain your position, using reasons and examples based on your own experiences, observations, or reading.




Should the old buildings be used for modern purposes when they stand on ground, such as certain confidential materials? 这句是什么意思呢?The problem seems to arouse controversy  different opinion groups. Whereas some many advocate that the old buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, so we should protect them, others may strongly oppose that we should explore the important resource for the people now to better use这里缺宾语哦. I agree with the spear 这个是什么用法呢?insofar as former, however, when recognizing that a more proper solution to the question can only be achieved by incorporating all relevant aspects, I find no empirical evidence to wholly accept the author's position, which appears to be unconvincing in light of more persuasive assertion. So, I would like to the 去掉support that the old buildings should be used for the modern purposes.


For the 去掉fundamental reason, which raises the debate, is how we define the value 应该用形容词source for the human beings. The 去掉one definingI would totally agree with is that if the resource could be made used会不会更好?for better purpose and the use好象经常多加the啊, which could bring us larger benefits, we should exploit it or substitute the old one for the new one. So, from this point of the view, we should encourage modern development, which will use the land that the old buildings stood. Although the old buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, which may be very essential for the history study, we could not deny the truth that the better use the resource could give birth invaluable wealth, which can beneficial这个要用动词形式 thousands of people, whereas just protecting the exist thing, if not exploit, could not only undermine the value of the resource itself, but also turn out worse results. For example The REP buildings in Shangdong Province, built in the BC 400would be considered a treasured resource, but taking protection for excuse, the local government always thought about relying on the money denoted for it but not  about any other way to develop its town , so how can the town go further ?


Another reason, which I believe the 好象应该说to be equally important, is that history is developing continuous要用副词形式. Therefore, in the long run, we should optimization the resource as much as possible to make our future more beautiful and more useable.  While the old building represents a valuable record of any society's past, we should substitute it for modern one. Because, for one thing, the land can be better use; for other thing, we should use the modern building to tell the people, the sociality what the recent people think, moreover, this modern building will tell the subsequent men that what happened in this period.


One will argue that how to deal with the past record, which always exist in the old things such as the old buildings. Here we part company. To be honest, it may be the case. However, our modern technological is sufficient to store this record. We could detect the everywhere and then record them in the computer to use whenever we need. Moreover, my dissenters may contend that one cannot detect everything, that is to say we may find more in the future. But I want to ask a question is why we study this record. Of course, we want to use this result of the study make our life better. Thus, we could not always think protect but develop. Because only the more the development, the better we live.


In final analysis, because of the above-mentioned reasons, which probably interweave into an organic whole and become more compelling, we are safely arrived at the conclusion that the old buildings should be used for the modern purpose.


这也是我写的第一篇,说明例子是杜攥得,请大家多多指教




第一篇这样很不错哦。但是要注意语法啊。

1用the用的不大对头看看讲冠词的语法书

2词性要注意啊

加油!

板凳
发表于 2005-8-21 22:08:00 | 只看该作者
注意题号应该是AI078不是AIA呵呵还有要记得贴题目哦。
地板
 楼主| 发表于 2005-8-21 22:16:00 | 只看该作者

题目我改了


版主好负责阿,这么快就批改了,真和好感谢!



such as certain confidential materials? 这句是什么意思呢?


是说像材料中说的,不知对不对



now to better use这里缺宾语哦. I agree with the spear 这个是什么用法呢?

这个我改成use better,可以吗?


那么,judy觉得我的论证方式可以吗,这样的写法不知道行不行?



[此贴子已经被作者于2005-8-21 22:19:54编辑过]
5#
发表于 2005-8-22 23:32:00 | 只看该作者

confidential是机密的意思吧?


你的论证方法很好啊,我觉得最好就是这种五段式了中间部分正正反有条有理。


语法要加强下下肯定没问题的。

6#
 楼主| 发表于 2005-8-23 21:10:00 | 只看该作者

哦,确实,是我抄的模版,嘻嘻

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