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Anthony Summer的写作贴~~~互帮互助共同进步啊!~~~~~求狠狠的批~~~~~????????????????????????????

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111#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-11-6 17:01:04 | 只看该作者
Tpo 21

In the lecture, the professor claims that genetic modification tress may bring some benefit at some points, but it will cost more damage. She totally opposes the three statements made in the reading passage.

First, the professor claims that genetically modified trees will resist one condition, but it cannot guarantee to survive. Most wild trees would die in the change of climate or insect, but some individual tree will resist. However, genetically modified trees will be wiped out, because of the genetic unity. Therefore, she objects to the reading's opinion that genetically modified trees are more likely to survive than their unmodified counterparts.

Second, the reading passage illustrates that genetically modified trees will bring a number of economic benefits to those who grow them. Actually, there have many hiding costs of growing genetically modified trees, such as: the company will charge the farmers more seeds fee, according to the law, farmers need pay every time when they replant the genetically modified trees.

Third, the professor opposes the statement that genetic modification trees will prevent overexploitation of wild trees. In fact, she argues that genetic modification trees will bring more damage than wild trees, it grows more aggressively, and easily exhausts the nutrition and water. Therefore, wild trees will out of the competition.
112#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-11-6 18:13:24 | 只看该作者
11.5
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In the past, it was easier for people to identify what types of career or job would lead to a secure, successful future.

With the developing of modern technology such as online job website or emails, and high-speed train, people can use different kind of solutions to find and identify an interesting job. Nowadays, people feel that it is much easier to find a satisfied job than ever before.

More and more professional job introduction website such as LinkedIn can help us getting more interview opportunity, so we have more chance to make a comparison between different jobs, and decided which one is more suitable. We can post our resume online, and wait for the headhunter come to call you if there are interested in you. Therefore, online job websites will save us a lot of time and opportunity chance, because without that website, we need take a visit to every company that we are interested, we would spend a lot of precious time and money on the way, we will feel exhausted and cannot make a right decision. With the help of internet, we can send our resume via email to more than one hundred different companies in one minutes. Meantime, we would never miss any online company new job introduction broadcast because we can listen to the copy of the video and know the company better. In the past, we had fewer chances to know the company that wanted to recruit new employees, unless we have the necessary connections such as we know someone in the company. In another way, some online job website provides us a chance to view senior people's resume, we even can add them as own friends and send them a message to ask their daily work functions and what make them gain the position, which will help us avoid many mistake and have a understand of the future career.

Nowadays, we have more available career choices than in the past, so we can easily choose a favorite one. We have the capital of the airplane, so we can drive the airplane every day, how amazing that is! We can enjoy the beauty of a foreign country, but we can still see our family members quite often. In the past, we could only be the capital of the ship, that means we need to change our human nature, freedom, to spend several months on the sea, and cannot see our families for a long time. Some other new job such as Online stock trader, which means we can work at home via internet, we will have a more flexible schedule and free time after work. We would never think about working at home in the past.

Although, some people would say they have too much choice to choose a favorite one. However, with the help of college education, everyone need learns some necessary working skill such as computer language knowledge to those want to develop a career at IT industry; Painting Skill to those want to have career at art area. Modern education become much more available to majority people. It is cheaper, and more interesting comparing in the past and it provides us a chance to try something that was only available for the rich students such as public relationship major or art major.

In one words, we have more choices and opportunity to find our favorite job than ever before.
113#
发表于 2012-11-6 21:28:58 | 只看该作者
With the developing of modern technology such as online job website or emails, and high-speed train, people can use different kind of solutions to find and identify an interesting job. Nowadays, people feel that it is much easier to find a satisfied job than ever before.

More and more professional job introduction website
s such as LinkedIn can help us getting(get就行啦) more interview opportunity(复数), so we have more chance(复数) to make a comparison between different jobs, and decided(为什么要加d?)which one is more suitable. We can post our resume online, and wait for the headhunter come to call you if there(是they吧) are interested in you. Therefore, online job websites will save us a lot of time and opportunity chance, because without that website, we need take a visit to every company that we are interested, we would spend a lot of precious time and money on the way, we will feel exhausted and cannot make a right decision.(三个句子,没有加连词) With the help of internet, we can send our resume via email to more than one hundred different companies in one minutes. Meantime, we would never miss any online company new job introduction broadcast because we can listen to the copy(个人感觉record比较好哈)of the video and know the company better. In the past, we had fewer chances to know the company that wanted to recruit new employees, unless we have the necessary connectionsconnection是指关系吗?个人感觉info比较好哈) such as(好像不加句子的吧。可以用从句)we know someone in the company. In another way(表示另一种方式,用on the other side个人认为比较好), some online job website provides(为什么加s啊?) us a chance to view senior people's resume, we even can add them as own friends(这个说法有点少见诶,make friends withand send them a message to ask their daily work functions(什么意思,望解释) and what make them gain the position, which will help us avoid many mistake(复数) and have a understandv of the future career.

Nowadays, we have more available career choices than in the past, so we can easily choose a favorite one. We have
the capital of(字典里都没查到诶,什么意思?不会是指资产?) the airplane, so we can drivetake比较好,又不是自己开飞机) the airplane every day, how amazing that is! We can enjoy the beauty of a foreign country, but we can still see our family members quite often.(论据是飞机让人方便了,但是论点不是我们有很多工作,且可以选喜欢的工作吗?没有关系诶) In the past, we could only be the capital of the ship, that means we need to change our human nature, freedom, to spend several months on the sea, and cannot see our families for a long time. Some other new job such(为了让这段话通,要删去) as Online stock trader, which means we can work at home via internet, we will have a more flexible schedule and free time after work. We would never think about working at home in the past.

实际上,可以把论点改为Nowadays, the development allow us to choose the favorite one without the limitation of time and loaction.

Although, some people would say they have too much choice
(复数) to choose a favorite one. However, with the help of college education, everyone need learns some necessary working skill(复数) such as computer language knowledge to those(for those who) want to develop a career at IT industry; Painting Skill(复数)to those(for those who) want to have career at art area. Modern education becomes much more available to majority people. It is cheaper, and more interesting comparing (that) in the past and it provides us a chance to try something that was only available for the rich students such as public relationship major or art major.

In one words, we have more choices and opportunity
(复数) to find our favorite job than ever before.

总结:写的不错,字数给力,单复数请多加注意,对有些句型结构要加强理解
114#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-11-7 17:29:25 | 只看该作者
tpo 22



The lecture objects to the statements mentioned in the reading passage. The professor said that growing process of planet will absorb carbon dioxide, and it would not influence source of food for animals and the price would finally decrease. Therefore, none of reading passage’s opinion are convinced.


First, the professor points out that the growing process of a plant would absorb the carbon dioxide as its nutrition, and it will neutralize the carbon dioxide after it made into gas released. He objects to the passage’s opinion – ethanol fuel would not help to solve one of the biggest environmental problems caused by gasoline use: global warming.

Lately, the professor mentioned that ethanol could be made from cellulose, since most animal did not eat cellulose so there would be no effect to reduce the amount of plants available for animal’s food supply. It against the passages said 10 percent of the fuel needs would consume 60 percent of the corn currently grown in the states.


Finally, the reading material points out that equal price of ethanol fuel and gas are a result of tax subsidies given by the United States Government. If the government were to stop helping the producer would result the greatly increase in price. However, the professor advocated that future production of ethanol fuel would be three times compare to the nowadays’ production, farmers need government help, but the sale price would finally decrease to the same level of gas.





謝謝Lmy批改啊!

1.connections 是指關係,但是info指代信息吧,感覺不妥啊

2.capital拼錯了,應該是captain of the airplane(機長)

3.so we can drivetake比较好,又不是自己开飞机) the airplane every day, (我其實是指機長能每天自己開飛機~)

另外口語小分隊我批改好你的作業傳到郵箱并回覆了,貌似你沒收到,留個QQ~
115#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-11-7 18:25:26 | 只看该作者
Tpo 23
In the lecture, the professor points out that the hypothesis made by the reading passage is not adequate to explain why the population of Yellow Cedar is declining. He points to several reasons to support his opinion.

First, the professor claims that the yellow cedar decline is not causing by insect parasites. In fact, health yellow cedar trees can secrete chemicals that can kill the cedar bark beetles. Therefore, they are unlikely to suffer from insect parasite. As instead, the trees that suffer from the parasites are already sick.

On the other hand, the professor objects to that brown bears cause the declining in yellow cedar population. The cedar population declined at both on the mainland an island, since there have no bears on the island.

What's more, the professor doubts the third hypothesis states that the change of climate is the cause of the cedar trees declination. He admits that the number of trees died on high elevation should be larger than that on a lower elevation because the temperature at high elevation is much colder. In fact, more trees died on low elevation, which opposite to the reading.
116#
 楼主| 发表于 2012-11-7 19:40:21 | 只看该作者
11.6
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The way of a person's dress is an indication of his or her personality or character.

I do not think a person's dress can indicate of his or her personality or character. There have many other determination factors such as career and age to help know a person. After some deep conversations, we can know what they like to do in their spare time and what kind of habits they have. Then, we can combine many factors together to make a conclusion, otherwise, we would misjudge a person's character, or blind by their outside such as their dress.

Some place such as school or workplace asks people dress unity, therefore, their clothes cannot indicate their personality. In my high school, every student was asked to dress the school uniform, some girl may wear some colorful hat or fashion shoes to different from other students, but their shoes, hat, or T-shirt cannot represent their character. In another way, some high pay workers such as bankers or strategy consultants, all of them dress business suit such as black or gray, which is not only company's policy but also is a respect to the client. Those bankers would dress very casual in their spare time, or some other bankers still dress very tasteful, how can you know what kind of personality they are! I need dress business suit every working day, but I would never dress them at weekend, because every time when I dress up I just feel lost some freedom and casualty, the well dress person is not really I. In another way, A wife may in charge of husband's and children's  clothes, this means people's dress sometimes means other's people's taste.

Again, some people who work at the factory, they need to dress some cloths good work. Meantime, they would dress some t-shirt or jacket in their spare time because they are used to casual clothes. However, we don't know what will they do in their spare time. They might like go to surfing on the wave ( it means they like sports) or they like hiking ( this means they like nature and excises ) or they just don't pay attention to their clothes at all, because they are work-class, they may don't have enough budget to buy fancy and hand-made clothes. Some soldiers need to dress uniform every day, therefore, uniform cannot represent a person's personality.

Although, we would say some movie stars who dress very shiny and colorful such as Lady Ga Ga, she is famous for her outstanding and surprise dress. Many people would say she is very open-minded and like trying new things. From some point, her dress is a good advertisement selling point to catch public's attention, which will bring her more exposure and a good advertisement paycheck. Other public people such as a president of an international company, he/she has private dress consultant, because him/her dress represents company's public image. Therefore, we would be blind by some people's dress.

In one words, we cannot tell people's personality who dress business suits at work time, it may be just a respect to the client, they probably dress very casual in their spare time. Moreover, some famous people's dress sometime represents company's image, so we cannot tell their personality, too.
117#
发表于 2012-11-7 19:59:10 | 只看该作者
The lecture objects to the statements mentioned in the reading passage. The professor said that growing process of planet will absorb carbon dioxide, and it would not influence source of food for animals and the price would finally decrease. Therefore, none of reading passage’s opinion are convinced.


First, the professor points out that the growing process of a plant would absorb the carbon dioxide as its nutrition, and it will neutralize
(用的非常好!) the carbon dioxide after it made into gas releasedit the process,made into是变为的意思吧,这里是什么意思呢?). He objects to the passage’s opinion – ethanol fuel would not help to solve one of the biggest environmental problems caused by gasoline use: global warming.(很全)

Lately, the professor mentioned that ethanol could be made from cellulose
(牛), since most animal did not eat cellulose so there would be no effect to reduce the amount of plants available for animal’s food supply. It against the passages said(这句话成分有点混乱诶)it is against what the passage mentions; 10 percent of the fuel needs would consume 60 percent of the corn currently grown in the states.


Finally, the reading material points out that equal price of ethanol fuel and gas are a result of tax subsidies given by the United States Government.
If the government were to stop helping the producer would result the greatly increase in price(成分混乱诶If the government were to stop helping the producerthe price would increase greatly in price However, the professor advocated that future production of ethanol fuel would be three times compare to the nowadays’ production, farmers need government help, but the sale price would finally decrease to the same level of gas.(三个句子一个连词,however不是连词,而且好像与原文有出入:demandàproductionàlower price3times production 40%decrease)



总结:

写得很好,有亮点

但是部分长句子的把握需要再提高





口语的东西我去检查一下哈,麻烦你了
118#
发表于 2012-11-7 20:04:33 | 只看该作者
The lecture objects to the statements mentioned in the reading passage. The professor said that growing (这是个动词哇,growth吧)process of planet (小错误哦)will absorb carbon dioxide, and it would not influence source of food for animals and the price would finally decrease. Therefore, none of reading passage’s opinion are convinced.


First, the professor points (你文章中出现了两种时态,貌似下面还有过去时)out that the growing process of a plant would absorb the carbon dioxide as its nutrition, and it will neutralize the carbon dioxide after it made into gas released. He objects to the passage’s opinion – ethanol fuel would not help to solve one of the biggest environmental problems caused by gasoline use: global warming.

Lately, the professor mentioned(第二种时态,最好用一种时态) that ethanol could be made from cellulose, since most animal did not eat cellulose so there would be no effect to reduce the amount of plants available for animal’s food supply. It against (小错误againsts)the passages said 10 percent of the fuel needs would consume 60 percent of the corn currently grown in the states.


Finally, the reading material points out that equal price of ethanol fuel and gas are (你前面是price,就不能用are, 应该是is)a result of tax subsidies given by the United States Government. If the government were(又是小错误,was ) to stop helping the producer would result the greatly increase in price. However, the professor advocated that future production of ethanol fuel would be three times compare to the nowadays’ production, farmers need government help, but the sale price would finally decrease to the same level of gas.

你的reading passage里面文章写得好多,最好把听到的多写才能拿高分.
119#
发表于 2012-11-7 22:25:35 | 只看该作者
I do not think a person's dress can indicate of his or her personality or character. There have(are) many other determination factors such as career and age to help know a person. After some deep conversations, we can know what they(这个最接近conversations,会造成指代错误) like to do in their spare time and what kind of habits they have. Then, we can combine many factors together to make a conclusion, otherwise, we would misjudge a person's character, or blind by their(跟前面的不对应) outside such as their dress.

Some places such as school or workplace(这个就中式英语了,这些物不会主动发出asks,应该把主要换成人) asks people dress unity(tidely), therefore, their clothes cannot indicate their personality. In my high school, every student was asked to dress the school uniform, some girl may wear(时态不一致了) some colorful hats or fashion shoes to different(这个不是不定式) from other students, but their shoes, hat, or T-shirt cannot(时态) represent their character. In another way, some high pay(paid) workers such as bankers or strategy consultants, all of them dress business suit such as black or gray(这两个是颜色,不能当suit用), which(which不能指代前面的一整句话) is not only company's policy but also is a respect(respect很少用这种方法,换show respect) to the client. Those bankers would(时态前后又不一致了) dress very casual(这个是形容词,换介词) in their spare time, or some other bankers still dress very tasteful(同casual错误), how can you know what kind of personality they are! I need dress business suit every working day, but I would never dress them(前后单复数不一致) at weekend, because every time when(可省去) I dress up I just feel lost some freedom and casualty, the well dress person is not really I(real me). In another way, A wife may in charge of husband's and children's  clothes, this means people's dress sometimes means other's people's taste.

Again, some people who work at the factory, (加连词)they need to dress some cloths good work(中式英语了). Meantime, they would(我不懂为什么要用过去将来时) dress some t-shirt or jacket in their spare time because they are used to casual clothes. However, we don't know what will they do in their spare time. They might like go to surfing on the wave ( it means they like sports) or they like hiking ( this means they like nature and excises ) or they just don't pay attention to their clothes at all, because they are work-class, they may don't have enough budget(用money) to buy fancy and hand-made clothes. Some soldiers need to dress uniform every day, therefore, uniform cannot represent a person's personality.

Although, we would say some movie stars who dress very shiny and colorful such as Lady Ga Ga, she is famous for her outstanding and surprise dress. Many people would say she is very open-minded and like trying new things. From some point, her dress is a good advertisement selling point to catch public's attention, which will bring her more exposure and a good advertisement paycheck. Other public people such as a president of an international company, he/she has private dress consultant, because him/her dress represents company's public image. Therefore, we would be blind by some people's dress.

In one words, we cannot tell people's personality who dress business suits at work time, it may be just a respect to the client, they probably dress very casual in their spare time. Moreover, some famous people's dress sometime represents company's image, so we cannot tell their personality, too.


实在不想打击LZ  你的语法有很严重的问题 尤其是时态问题 导致后面半篇我几乎没有耐心看完了
还有中式英语很严重 很多词语都是被你直接翻译过来的 人家老美又不一定懂
在语法上先多下功夫吧
文章逻辑也有点模糊 上升空间还有很大
120#
发表于 2012-11-8 17:45:35 | 只看该作者
11.7的独立快写哦,我可能得迟点给你改了,今天得出门,sorry~
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